Adore Me

by Jillian Dodd

"Totally. Peyton has the best ass. I want to own it. Explore it's surrounding areas."

  I laugh. "You need to stay out of that part of town." He laughs, although I'm pretty sure he's completely serious, so I say, "Damian, if you really like her, shouldn't you want to take it slow?"

  "I am taking it slow because what I really want to do is wave one of your magic wands, make you disappear, and throw her across a chaise and fuck her until she can't move."

  "Damian!"

  "Come on, don't pretend like you don't want Aiden to do that to you. You two have so much chemistry if you don't do it pretty soon you may combust and kill us all."

  That makes me laugh. "Maybe, but if she's really your future wife, you should wait a little. I mean, what would you tell your kids?"

  "I'd tell them Mom's ass looked so good in her bikini I couldn't help myself. My sons will understand."

  "And your daughters?"

  "We're not having daughters if Inga's palm reading isn't total bullshit. But if we did, I'd tell them the love at first sight story. Perpetuate the future generation's obsession with fairy tales." He grins at me. "Maybe I'd even tell them she was a mermaid."

  I smack him. "Very funny."

  "Do you think your mom and Tommy waited?"

  "Ha. No. I'm pretty sure they did it on their first date. But, then, if a guy as hot as Tommy took me and my daughter on a private jet to a Russian ballet, I wouldn't have waited either."

  "You and Aiden remind me of them."

  "What did you mean?"

  "When you aren't obsessing about your lack of a future and let yourself have fun, you just glow. Hell, you both glow."

  "Do you like him?"

  "Yeah, Keats, I like him. But just as a forewarning, don't plan on us hanging out tonight. I'm taking Peyton on our first date."

  "Where are you going?"

  "We're gonna take the jeep, drive up the mountain, and look for shooting stars."

  "In the words of your father, So you're taking her parking?"

  He laughs out loud. "Oh my gosh. I about died when he said that to us in front of everyone. I'm sure I looked completely guilty."

  "We both did. The funny thing is that never once crossed my mind."

  "That's because you were hell bent on acting out some script you were writing. Where they laid on top of a mountain, held hands, and made wishes on shooting stars."

  "That seems like a long time ago."

  "Things were just simpler then."

  "Yeah, they were," I say quietly, biting my lower lip.

  "No. No. No. Don't start with the pout."

  Aiden comes back, tosses Damian a bottle of water, and says to me, "Why are you pouting?"

  "Because I'm taking your sister out tonight. She's jealous."

  "Jealous?" Aiden says, looking a little confused.

  "She loves looking at the stars."

  "I'm sure we can find some stars of our own," Aiden says, kissing my cheek before running back out into the water with Damian.

  Peyton comes wandering back out to our chaises with Sven in tow. She's carrying a laptop and Sven has two of his wickedly strong hurricane drinks on a tray. He sets them on a side table next to us and then heads back into the house.

  "These drinks are really strong," I tell her.

  "Perfect. I need to relax. I can't relax around him. It's like I'm strung out, waiting for the next hit. The next kiss."

  "If you break into song about how his love is your drug, I may have to smack you."

  She laughs, sipping and watching Damian on the wakeboard. "Wow, he's good on that thing. Almost as good as Aiden. I wouldn't think a guy that plays guitar would be so athletic."

  "Damian is like Aiden. There isn't anything he can't do if he puts his mind to it." I laugh. "It pissed me off when we were younger. I was always trying to keep up with him. So what's the computer for?"

  "Tell me that you have internet here and that you won't laugh at what I'm about to do."

  "We have internet. The password is crabbypatties. And I'll try not to laugh."

  She types on the laptop. "I'm about to match our horoscopes, so I need to know his birthday."

  I laugh, not because I think it's funny but because I did the exact same thing when I was crushing on B. Horoscope matches. Magic Eight ball questions. Fortune cookies. Numerology. Anything to give me hope that we might be together someday.

  "You're laughing," she says, scrunching up her nose at me.

  "Only because I've done the same thing when obsessed with a boy."

  "Okay," she says clicking away. "I'm a Virgo and he's a, what?"

  "An Aquarius. Smart. Creative. A little bit temperamental."

  "Hmm," she says. "This says that when Virgo and Aquarius team up they can either bring out the best or worst of each other. It seems I have a rigid and theoretical approach to life."

  "Do you?"

  "Yeah, I'm big on theory. And list making. And I need a certain order in my life to function."

  I watch Damian out on the wakeboard, cutting as hard as he can across the wake and then racing up the side of the wave runner, trying to get ahead of Aiden. He's going balls out. Not once thinking about anything other than the rush. "Damian isn't that way at all. He's the anti-list maker."

  "This says that Aquarians are poetic." She pauses. "I guess that would fit since songs are basically poetry. Oh, here. It says that we can thrive on our differences and grow together as we learn about each other. That's romantic, right?"

  "Yes, it's romantic. What else does it say?"

  "It says he's passionate, modern, hates routine, and seeks spiritual enlightenment, but that he can be opinionated and stubborn."

  "Wow. That's pretty much on target, except it makes it sound like he's kind of a slacker. And he's not. He's highly motivated."

  "Oh, my gosh. Listen to the end. The most positive aspect of their union is that their combined ambition can drive them to do miraculous things together. Their relationship is enlightening and full of pleasure."

  "I think the pleasure is referring to the mental kind," I say as I watch Peyton lick her lips.

  "He's got amazing arms, don't you think?" she asks dreamily.

  I look at his biceps flexing to hold the rope. "Yeah, he's got great arms. All that guitar playing, I suppose. And he loves to golf."

  "Really?" she says, her eyes getting big. "Me too. Well, I like to drive the beer cart." She stops staring dreamily at him and says, "Okay, let's match you and Aiden."

  "Oh, no. That's okay. I don't even know his sign."

  "Luckily, I do. Did you know on his birthday he'll be 18? And that I'm already 19?"

  "No, I didn't know that."

  "We don't really tell people."

  "Why? Were you held back?"

  "In a way. We missed a year of school when my mom got cancer. It was the worst year of my life for lots of reasons. I was scared she'd die. Pissed I had to leave my friends and move to California. Although the worst part was watching her lose her hair. She had the most beautiful hair. Anyway, we're both a year behind and part of what made me put Go to boarding school on my bucket list. I couldn't handle it like Aiden could."

  I look at Aiden driving the wave runner, laughing, and having a great time. He now appears to be on a mission to make Damian crash. He's driving in tight circles and trying to whip him around like you would to get someone off an innertube.

  "He didn't tell me."

  "I know. He doesn't like to talk about it either. Alright, so what's your sign?"

  "I'm a Leo."

  "L-e-o," she says as she types. "And he's a Sag-it-tar-ius."

  "He is?" I say in shock. I seriously never would have guessed that. And I know every single Sagittarius quality by heart, because I've studied B's horoscope more than I have my own.

  "Oh, wow. Listen to this! When you get together the result is usually fireworks. You are both dynamic and like to enjoy life to the fullest. As a couple, you are lots of fun to be around. And you encourage each other. And
even though the Sagittarius' philosophical ways can compete with Leo's love of all things material and bigger than life, they can still get along. They admire and respect each other and together they radiate energy."

  "That's okay, you don't have to keep reading," I say. "I get it. We're a good match."

  "But there's so much more," she says excitedly. "It says the Sagittarius' sign is an archer, meaning he goes slowly and likes to take his time surveying his target. Oh, and he's a flirt. It says you might be bothered by that though because you like to be admired. It also says it will be a relationship full of passion and heat. So you're a good match horoscopically."

  "Is that a word?"

  "Ha. I have no idea. But you know what I mean. It also says here that Leo's sometimes pout to get their way. Do you do that?"

  "Of course not," I say, shaking my head.

  "She's lying," Damian says, suddenly standing in front of me. "What are you two doing?"

  "Nothing!" Peyton says, her eyes big as she slams the laptop shut. "Just girl talk."

  "Did you girls realize it's 2:30 already and almost time for Thanksgiving dinner?"

  "Uh, no," Peyton says. "What time is dinner?"

  "It's at three. And we can't be late."

  "Oh, I better go get ready. What are you wearing, Keatyn?"

  I grab her arm. "Come with me. I have the perfect dress for you to wear."

  "Meet us in the great room, boys," I say with a wave to Damian and Aiden.

  I pretend to be just taking her up to get a dress, but internally I am freaking out.

  I assumed because B and I were so perfectly matched it meant he was my destiny. I mean, we fell in love at first sight, and we were perfectly cosmically matched. We were made for each other.

  But so is Aiden?

  I drag Peyton up to my room trying to focus on clothing.

  I take her into my closet and pull out the gorgeous red slip dress I bought back when my goal was to seduce Aiden. "Here, wear this."

  I hand her a strapless bra and the dress.

  When she puts it on, she goes, "Wow. Just the way this dress glides over my skin feels sexy."

  "You look amazing, but the bra looks bad. You may have to take it off."

  "I can't go braless."

  "Just try it." She undoes the bra and pulls it out from underneath the dress. "Now, look."

  "I feel so sexy. Like, I've never really wanted to be sexy before. More like I just wanted to look hot, you know?"

  "Yeah, I know. Did you bring some strappy sandals?"

  "I have a pair of silver heels."

  "Perfect, but just carry them. Set them on the floor next to you. You'll totally look casual but, yet, amazing."

  "Okay, I'm going to go put on a little makeup. I'll meet you in the great room."

  She stops, gets tears in her eyes, and looks at me. Then she rushes back to me and gives me a tight hug. "Thank you for bringing me here and for the dress. I've never been so happy in my life."

  "Just have fun tonight. He's taking you somewhere special."

  "That's what he said, but he won't tell me where. Seriously, I feel like I've walked into a fairytale. Hell, I'm even getting dressed in a flipping turret."

  "Go finish getting ready, so you'll look perfect," I say, escorting her to the door.

  Once I close it, I sit on my bed and stare at the computer she left behind.

  Yes. I'm a glutton for punishment.

  But I can't stop myself.

  I open it and type in our match on a different website hoping to get a different result.

  And I do.

  But this one is worse.

  As a lover, the Sagittarius man likes to explore his lover's mind, body, and soul.

  I shut the computer and focus on getting ready.

  I quickly shower off then throw on a soft crepe halter dress with an ombre wash that variegates from a pale pink at the neck to a deep orange at the hem. I pair it with white studded double strapped platform wedges.

  My mind suddenly flashes to Aiden slowly taking this dress off me.

  I close my eyes and indulge my mind for a few seconds before focusing on looking amazing.

  I braided my hair while it was wet and let it dry in the sun, so I unbraid it, gently run my fingers through the soft waves and then add some balm to make it shine.

  I stand back and study myself in the mirror. My face is tan and glowing, so I decide to skip foundation and blush and just add some sparkly pink eye shadow, a thin swoop of black liner, a bunch of mascara, and a peachy lipgloss.

  I check the time and, seeing that I have a few minutes to spare, decide to check my phone.

  There are texts from all of the Johnson boys, Maggie & Logan, Annie, and Katie, all wishing me a Happy Thanksgiving. But it's Dallas' text that cracks me up.

  Dallas: Would it be in bad taste if I offered to share my wishbone with the governor's hot 16-year-old daughter?

  Me: You can always make me laugh. I love that about you. Happy Thanksgiving. Let me know if she decides to, uh, make a wish.

  It's noon in Vancouver, so I decide to call my family. I remember last Thanksgiving. The girls running around in little pilgrim headbands. Gracie wanting Tommy to buy her a pet turkey.

  The phone is answered with, "Bonjour."

  "Well, bonjour to you. Is this Avery?"

  "Kiki?!"

  "Hi, sweetie. I just called to tell you happy Thanksgiving. Are you going to eat lots of turkey and stuffing today?"

  She lets out a big sigh. "We were supposed to."

  "What happened?"

  "Bad Kiki jumped up on the kitchen island and ate the turkey while we were setting the table."

  "Oh, no! I bet Daddy was mad."

  "He said merde. That's a bad word."

  "Yes, it is. Why are you speaking French today?"

  "I'm practicing. We're moving to France!"

  I let out a huge sigh of relief, knowing that Mom would never tell the girls unless it was a sure thing.

  "That's amazing! You'll love it there."

  "Mommy says we'll get to go to the store, and to the beach, and to the park there! We don't get to here."

  "That will be so much fun. Can I talk to your sisters?"

  "Sure! I'll go get them."

  I hear her running through the house, her little bare feet padding across the hardwood floors. I swear, this time next year, I'll be with them. No matter what.

  I hear a chorus of, "Kiki!!" and "Happy Turkey Day, Kiki!"

  Then, "Gracie, don't grab the phone out of my hands! It's rude!"

  Then Gracie's sweet little voice, "I miss my Good Kiki."

  "I miss you too, Gracie. I heard the puppy was naughty and ate your turkey."

  Gracie laughs. "Daddy was chasing after Bad Kiki and she had bones in her mouth. I laugh and laugh at Daddy and Kiki."

  "It bet it was funny. How's Mommy?"

  "She's sick."

  "Sick?"

  "Yes, she in bed wiff the flu."

  "Can I talk to her?"

  "She sleeping. Daddy say, Girls, be quiet. But Daddy yelled at Kiki."

  "Where's Kiki now?"

  "Under Gracie's bed. She know it safe cuz Gracie love her Bad Kiki. Daddy say Kiki might not go to France and Gracie cry and tell Daddy, Bad Kiki no go, Gracie no go."

  I can't help but laugh. I so wish I was there, because even though the house is always filled with chaos, it's like the perfect chaos. I hope Inga was right. I pray I live a long life and have a houseful of my own kids someday.

  "Keatyn?" a deep voice asks.

  "Hey, Tommy. Happy Thanksgiving. The girls said they're moving to France."

  "Happy Thanksgiving to you too, baby. Tell me you're with some friends and not all alone."

  "I'm with some friends, Tommy."

  He lets out a sigh. "Good. One less thing to worry about."

  "Is Mom okay?"

  "Oh, yeah, just the flu. Everyone on set has been sick."

  "Okay, good. I heard the dog ate
the turkey."

  "Damn dog. She's lucky she's so cute and Gracie loves her so much."

  "I gotta go eat dinner, but tell Mom I love and miss her. And tell her next year things will be different."

  "I hope you're right," he says, and then we say goodbye.

  I don't know what's wrong with me. It's like I have pre-traumatic death syndrome or something. Every time I think of my future, I picture me dead.

  Which makes me feel guilty, because I know Cooper's Thanksgiving has to be rougher than mine.

  Me: I was thinking of you today. I know it's gotta be tough.

  Cooper: I was thinking of you today too.

  Me: Don't worry about me.

  Cooper: Garrett says you're not going back to school.

  Me: I was going to discuss my plan with you after the holiday.

  Cooper: Tell me now.

  Me: Um, it's still in the planning stages, that's why I want to talk to you.

  Cooper: Yet it sounds like you've made up your mind.

  Me: I have about school. I just haven't decided for sure where I'm going to live.

  Cooper: Don't take off on your own.

  Me: I wasn't planning to. I was going to ask you to come with me.

  Cooper: See, you're smarter than Garrett thinks.

  Me: He thinks I'm going to do something stupid.

  Cooper: Are you?

  Me: I considered walking into Vincent's office and telling him I want to audition for his movie.

  Cooper: Tell me you scrapped that plan.

  Me: Not quite yet. I wanted to get your thoughts. He's like a bully, Cooper. Maybe I just need to stand up to him.

  Cooper: There is a big difference between a bully and a sociopath. Do some research.

  Me: Does that mean if I don't go back to school, you'll still help me?

  Cooper: Of course.

  Me: That makes me cry, Cooper. Thank you. I just want to be proactive instead of sitting around waiting for him to find me.

  Cooper: Go eat some turkey. I heard your dinner smells amazing.

  Me: Have you been keeping tabs on me?