by J. C. Allen
“I don’t know yet,” I said. I decided maybe a little bit of humor might just help. “Maybe a girl, so her and Michael can fall in love and we’ll all be one big family.”
“Hm. A boy would be cute, he could take baby pictures with a motorcycle and leather jacket.”
I nodded in agreement, but it was still hard to forgo all the fantasies I had of my first child. I was supposed to be in a loving relationship, married, and the father was supposed to actually want the baby.
But this way is how it is, and I have to accept that.
“Ice cream?” Rosella suggested.
“I don’t want to get fat just because I am pregnant.”
Rosella rolled her eyes. I suppose I really did forget that I was inexperienced. Rosella, after all, had had Michael and she was working to have a second.
“Oh my god, did you forget I gained like fifty pounds?”
We both chuckled a little bit, but then my phone buzzed. It was Matthew.
“You should answer,” she said. “He just wants to know you’re safe.”
Begrudgingly, I did.
But then it got worse.
Simon told her I was here. I wanted to kill him when I heard that. So did Rosella.
“Why did you tell him she was here?”
She smacked his arm, but he just laughed. Neither of us found it particularly funny.
“Matthew would have put out an APB or something if I didn’t. Relax.”
Still, he had the good sense to leave the room, perhaps recognizing we were both going to kick his ass if he stayed any longer. It was nice to see at least one Kinsmen was empathic.
It almost made me jealous of Rosella’s spot.
“Did you decide on having more kids?”
“We haven’t, for now. It’s an ongoing argument, every once in a while.”
Or not. None of the goddamn Kinsmen want kids, huh?
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” she said. “I understand where he is coming from. He wants to be there to see what he missed the first time.”
Empathy in a relationship… would be nice…
Maybe I can lead by example.
“Yeah.”
We talked more, and I started to feel a little—a tiny bit—better. She even stayed in the guest room for a while with me before I began to feel too tired to fall asleep.
She didn’t leave, though, without some parting advice.
“Meet with him tomorrow okay? When you both have level heads. You two were really good together, you could be anyway.”
Though I wanted to disagree with her, I knew she was right. For the sake of my baby, Matthew and I had to at least get along.
“Okay. Thank you. I’ll be out of your hair by morning.”
“No, you won’t be,” Rosella said firmly. “Stay as long as you want to, I mean it.”
“What about Simon?”
“What about him?”
We laughed together before I had one of my few pleasant thoughts of the night—this is why she’s my best friend. She’ll put me ahead of even her husband.
She left shortly after, but her last bit of advice stuck with me. I rolled over, grabbed my phone, and texted with the last bit of energy I had.
“Let’s meet tomorrow and talk about this, but I haven’t changed my mind. I am keeping this baby with or without you.”
He replied almost instantly, like he was waiting.
“See you tomorrow angel.”
I wanted to scoff at that stupid pet name, but I was asleep just seconds later.
Michael, naturally, woke me up.
He was laughing along with his cartoons. It may have only been seven in the morning, but his laughter had me wide awake. It was my first morning waking up after knowing what the future had in store for me, and…
I feel different. I really do.
I looked at myself in the mirror and lifted my shirt to observe my belly. I tried to imagine it fully rounded and pregnant and… I smiled. I really did.
I had always wanted kids. I thought I had to give up for a while because being in a loveless marriage didn’t sound like a good idea, but now I was pregnant regardless. Might as well make the most of it.
I then agreed to meet Matthew for lunch at a restaurant. I knew a public place was probably a good thing, just so we didn’t make a scene. I was a little bit calmer now and knew that such a thing was unlikely to happen, but still, it was better to be safe than to have an outburst that would get ugly in private.
Or, God forbid, wind up having sex with him again and catching unrequited feelings.
But before that, I knew what I had to do even more—and I was dreading it.
I called my father. At least he’s the more reasonable of the two parents.
“Sweetheart, I’m so glad you called.”
“Hi Dad.”
I held back my tears at hearing his cheery voice. Dad, though, saw right through it.
“What’s wrong?”
“I have to tell you something. And I don’t want you to get angry with me.”
“Of course.”
Thank you, Dad. Please don’t break your promise.
“I’m pregnant, Dad. I barely know the father and I know that it’s really messy and unbecoming but I’m keeping the baby and I’m… I’m just sorry.”
I rambled on until I lost my footing and my breath. Dad went silent on the other end. I knew he was thinking, as he was a heavy thinker. It was how he made his millions.
“Gracinda… how did this happen?”
“I don’t know, Dad. I was just… being careless I suppose.”
“Is he a good man?”
I was shocked by how quickly he pivoted to the question. He was forward thinking in that regard—I guess he figured there was no point wasting time on what could not be changed or reversed.
“I… I’d like to think so.”
“This is why we wanted you to stay here. Keep an eye on you.”
I nodded. If my mother had said it, I probably would have gotten too upset to keep talking. My dad, though, said it in an empathic and kind way.
“I know.”
He sighed, but he didn’t swear or mutter under his breath.
“You could come home. We’ll arrange something for you so that you can have privacy.”
I gave that serious thought, I really did. But…
Maybe I was crazy. Maybe a part of me still wanted Matthew to work out. But I didn’t think it was right to just pack up shop and leave without giving Matthew a chance of any kind.
“I—I don’t think I should leave the father out of it, Dad.”
“But how will you take care of it?”
You’re too practical for your own good, Dad.
“I sort of have a job and… um, I can find another job.”
I knew it sounded weak. It was obvious that, at best, I was stretching the truth.
But thankfully, my Dad knew what mattered most, and it wasn’t calling me out for that in that very moment.
“You don’t have to. I’ll send you money—”
“But then you’ll just give me another ultimatum, like Mom did.”
He chuckled. I had to remind myself that my father was not my mother.
“I am not your mother, Gracinda. No ultimatum, I just want you to be okay. But. I will ask that you come visit soon while you can still travel with the father.”
I gulped. The proposition scared me, especially because it meant getting close to my family again.
But I saw little choice in the matter.
“Um… okay Dad. Thank you.”
“Good. I will send something over, how much do you need?”
17
Matthew
I had left Jaxson’s place feeling twenty percent better.
I still had a dark pit in the bottom of my stomach, and it wouldn’t go away until I saw Grace again. I realized it had taken me way too long to realize this was what I wanted. Maybe it was too fast… but these moments of
thinking Grace was gone, with our baby, was the worst of my life. I wanted her, I wanted all of it, and I was going to fight like hell to get her back.
No matter what it takes.
I woke up early to meet my mom at the hospital for breakfast, since she worked the night shift. I wouldn’t even feel right until I told her. She’ll know exactly what to do. It’s Mom.
“Matthew, you’re early.”
Mom hugged me, looking more tired than I remember. It must have been a long night—but, also, unfortunately, the more time that went by without Dad, the harder things seemed to be getting for her.
“Yeah, I have to, uh…”
Just get to the point.
“Can we sit?”
She gave me a long look, as if to imply it better be important, and then led me over to the lounge. I waited as she poured two cups of coffee and then sat next to me.
“You look tired.”
“I am tired,” she said with a weary laugh. “What was so important you had to meet right now?”
I took a heavy breath, sipped the coffee, and ran my sweaty palms down my jeans. Mom had made a lot of points about doing the right thing over the years, and getting someone pregnant I barely knew wasn’t the best thing or even a right thing. I knew this conversation was going to suck badly.
“I, um…”
She playfully swatted my thigh.
“What is it, Matty?”
I looked in her eyes, found an ounce of courage, let it all come barreling out of me.
“Grace is pregnant. And it’s mine.”
I swallowed hard as her face dropped. For several seconds, she just stared at me silently. I knew I had fucked up, but seeing my Mom upset was one of the worst things I could have experienced. Finally, she shook her head and exhaled softly.
“What are you going to do?”
What am I going to do. Great question.
I could have told her I have to first get Grace to forgive me for being such an asshole, and then I had work out how to be in a relationship with her. I didn’t know if I should actually ask her to marry me or if that would seem too forward, but I didn’t want our kid to have a broken home.
What I did say, however, was the best answer possible.
“The right thing.”
She smiled sadly and took my hand.
“Okay.”
It was such a simple response, with more said through her kind tone and her actions than the word. I didn’t know… I didn’t know if I needed to expect more on the other side.
“You aren’t mad?”
She laughed once, sipping on her coffee before she continued.
“No, you’re a grown man, I can’t do much more raising.”
“Disappointed, then?”
That, too, was met with a head shake.
“You’re my good boy, Matthew. I know you’ll do the right thing. If you don’t, then we’ll have a talk. But until then… are you happy?”
I took a shaky breath. The morning had given me a chance to reflect upon everything, and I knew the answer.
“Yeah. I am.”
That will be even more true after I meet with Grace and make things right.
“Good,” she said with a gentle smirk. “I’ve always wanted more grandkids anyway.”
I texted with Grace to figure out when to meet.
Admittedly, I was surprised she picked such a late time. This meant I had to sit around until four and stew in my thoughts. I talked with my brothers, which helped some… until they started making jokes about it. At least Simon said that she seemed fine, but he didn’t know her like I do.
I left with enough time to make it to Simon’s house to pick her up. I decided to drive my car, because I didn’t think a pregnant woman riding a motorcycles, even one relatively new to pregnancy, was a good idea, and I didn’t want to find out the hard way otherwise.
Walking up to the door made my heart race. I had to focus to text her that I was here. It had only been one night, but I missed her terribly already. Just being without her was a reminder that no matter how I felt about a kid—something that I was starting to come more and more around to once I had left my mother’s house—I had to be there for Grace.
I knocked.
There was no answer at first. I figured that maybe Grace was just making me deliberately wait as a sort of test, and while that might have seemed somewhat in character with Grace, it didn’t seem that in character with her. She was weird, but she had never struck me as particularly rude.
I knocked again and rang the doorbell twice for emphasis, but again, there was no answer. Annoyed, I checked the driveway and saw that Rosella’s car was there, meaning Grace and Michael almost certainly were. Simon’s bike wasn’t, but I just figured that he was on club business.
One final time, I knocked.
And still, there was no answer. I had in memory of what had happened the previous night with Jaxson and Isabelle all too well, and I did not want to repeat history. So, as a less awkward interruption of what I assumed was some frisky times between Rosella and Simon and maybe naps for Grace and Michael, I called Simon. I didn’t expect him to answer, just to see that—
“Hey bud,” Simon said almost immediately.
“You in the house?” I said, trying to get right to the point.
“Uh, no, did you not see my bike there? I’m doing some construction work.”
I sighed, but a new feeling was coming over me in place of annoyance—worry. Had something happened? Had Grace decided to just go back to her family and have Rosella drive her? That was unfortunately possible.
“Did… did Grace say anything about leaving?”
“No?” Simon said, as befuddled by my question as anything else. “Last I heard, you were going to pick her up right now and take her to a late lunch.”
“Yeah… that’s the thing. I am there. She’s not answering.”
I could hear Simon sigh, and it wasn’t a frustrated sigh.
“Well, you have a key to my place, check it out,” he said. “And if anything is out of sorts, just let me know.”
“Will do, thanks,” I said before hanging up the phone.
I tucked it into my pocket, wishing that I had a gun to pull out—now I was full out worried. If something had happened… if one of Rosella’s cousins had suddenly returned…
I found Simon’s key amongst the many on my key chain and opened the door slowly. I peeked inside.
“Grace?” I shouted. “Rosella? Michael?”
No answer came. The place felt empty for how quiet it was.
I turned the corner.
And I just barely ducked as a man swung a fist at me.
I ducked and tackled him, slamming him into the oven. I had no idea who the hell this man was—I had never seen him in my life—but anyone who was in the house of my brother that I didn’t know or, put more simply, anyone who tried to hit me was going to get hurt. He tried to drop some fists on my back, but he couldn’t get a lot of force behind them and they more or less bounced off of me, weak attempts to damage me that didn’t mean anything.
I then drove back my head, only to headbutt him straight in the gut. He had some muscles on him, but the action still stunned him long enough that I rose up, delivered a strong right hook, and knocked him to the ground.
“Who the fuck are you?!” I shouted.
The man, bloodied in the face and woozy in the eyes, groaned and looked up at me with hatred in his eyes.
“This is for Uncle Nic—”
I didn’t need to hear anything else. I curbstomped his face, knocking him out.
Problem solved.
But that only meant I was aware of the much bigger problem—Grace, Michael, and Rosella were nowhere to be seen. And it wasn’t hard to figure out that someone had come through here and ransacked the entire place.
Now that I wasn’t preoccupied by someone trying to knock me out like Mike Tyson, I got the chance to see just how much damage the Cavaros had done to this house. Everythi
ng was turned upside down. Many things were broken in half or destroyed. It would take a significant amount of money to fix what had been done here, but that was the least of my concerns.
I went through every bedroom and every spot, just checking to see if maybe, just maybe, Michael or one of the women had been smart enough to hide when everything else went down. But no matter where I looked, no matter where I checked out, they were gone without a clue.
There was only one thing that was left besides the man.
A note.
“I told you more were coming. And now more are.”
Jesus.
I called Simon right back, and it only took one right to reach him.
“Matthew, what—”
“Simon, Rosella’s been kidnapped,” I said. “Along with Grace and Michael.”
He didn’t say a word. I think he was too much in shock to say anything.
“Let’s meet at the clubhouse. We can go over what to do there. I’ll alert Zeke and Jaxson.”
It took us less than about an hour to get everyone together. Simon looked like he wanted to break the table in the meeting room, not that I could blame him. Jaxson had a scowl on his face that would have intimidated the devil. Zeke, smartly, wasn’t making any wisecracks now—he knew that both Simon and I were bound to punch him in the face if he so much as joked about the women we loved being kidnapped.
In the corner, bundled up and tied up, was the man that had tried to knock me out. He was still passed out, but he was breathing, alive. He would prove useful eventually—if he would break. If he breaks in time. Doesn’t do us any good if the Cavaros kill them before we can get this guy to snap.
“So you think it was the same guy?” Jaxson said. “The same guy who sent us the email.”
“Has to fucking be,” I said. “The note more or less said the same thing. ‘I told you more were coming. And now more are.’ What the fuck does that sound like to you?”
“I know,” Jaxson said, but his question sure made it seem like he didn’t.
“Fucking Cavaros,” Beast grumbled.
“We should have hunted them down and killed them when we had the chance,” Simon said. “Should never have let it come to this.”