by E. M. Leya
I couldn't think about all of this right now. It was overwhelming. "So I'm stuck here until I change?"
"Not stuck here, but stuck with me. I don't trust you. You were part of two attacks on my friends. While I know you just stood by while it happened, you were there and didn't stop it from happening. Even not knowing the wolves were people, you should have had enough sense to stop any kind of abuse to an animal. Right now, you're under my supervision until I trust you enough to be on your own. The house is secure, and as long as you don't have the codes, you can't get out without me. We'll go into town, go to the pack house, and get out once in a while, but for the most part, make yourself comfortable. After the change, it will be even worse. I won't trust your wolf, and neither should you for the first while. You'll have to make peace with your wolf before you can go out alone." Justice stood. "Tonight, just relax. You can watch TV or whatever. There's plenty to keep you occupied around here. Tomorrow, I'll bite you and then we wait."
I nodded. I hated feeling like a prisoner, but at least now I was in a home, not stuck in a cell as I had been before this. I wasn't looking forward to not having nothing to do. I would go insane sitting around staring at the TV all of the time, but thanks to what Justin had done when he'd killed the shifter, attacked the others, my life was no longer my own. Desperate for some time to think, I glanced at Justice. "You said I have a room?"
"Yep, follow me." He led me up a large staircase to the second floor. "Third floor is Tavish's space, leave it alone. You'll be here on the second floor with me. My room is at the end of the hall if you need anything. The main floor and basement are open to you to explore. If you need anything, just ask. You're going to suffer enough going through the change, so I'm not going to make you suffer here. Treat this as your home. Other than not being able to leave, you're free to do what you want." He paused at a door. "This will be your room while you’re here. There's a bathroom attached, and it should be stocked with everything you need. I'll cook dinner in an hour or so. Up to you if you want to eat with me or go it alone." Justice pushed the door open. "I'll leave you be."
"Thanks." I looked into the room, shocked to find a king-sized bed made of what looked like antique wood, with matching dresser and nightstands. A huge draped window sat to one side of the room. I walked over to look out, taking in the view of the forest as far as I could see. Had I been here for any other reason, I might enjoy it, but since I was here as a punishment, I saw it only as a reminder of how far away from my old life I was.
Scared and confused, I sank down on the bed, hoping I'd make it through whatever it was my future held.
CHAPTER TWO
Mark
After spending the night in my room, I was a bit calmer than I had been. Justice had left me alone, only speaking with me at dinner, and even that had been small talk. We'd talked about the weather, how long we'd both been in Montana and simple things that didn't have anything to do with why I was there.
Now, waking up to face the new day, my fear was amped up again. With only two options, being bitten or dying, I didn't have much of a choice. Today would be the day that I faced my punishment and let Justice bite me.
I still didn't know where I wanted him to bite me. No one place sounded better than the other. I mean, of course, I didn't want my face, hands, or feet bitten. I wanted to be able to function with the injury. Not knowing for sure how severe the bite would be, I couldn't plan on how long it might take to heal. There was so much I didn't know, but asking questions almost scared me more than the not knowing did.
I took a shower and dressed in some clothes that Justice had gotten for me. I had no idea how he knew my size, but I was glad he'd realized I didn't have much. When the wolves had taken me, I'd left everything I owned, which hadn't been much, at the friend's house I'd been staying with. With nothing more than the clothes on my back, I'd wondered what I would do. It was strange that Justice seemed to know what I needed before I did.
Slowly, making my way downstairs, I tried to fight back the growing fear and nervousness. I didn't want this. I hated that I was forced into this position. It wasn't like I had any choice. I either die or let Justice change me into some creature that, until recently, I'd thought were only fairy tales and horror stories.
"Morning." Justice sat at the kitchen table with his laptop in front of him. "Coffee is hot and there are pancakes on a plate in the microwave if you're hungry."
"Thanks." I wasn't used to eating most mornings, but I was going to take advantage of having food around while I could. Aware of Justice watching me, I poured a cup of coffee and went to work on smothering the pancakes with butter and syrup. "You've eaten?"
"Hours ago." Justice smiled.
"What time is it?"
"Almost ten."
"Wow, I usually don't sleep that late." I took the plate and coffee to the table. "Thanks for cooking for me."
"No problem." Justice turned his attention back to the computer.
I ate in silence, savoring the food. I was starving. While I managed to eat a bit here and there, it hadn't been much over the last few months. It sucked having no money and no place to live. If what Justice said was true, that was all changed now. I would be here for weeks or longer from the sound of it.
Another wave of nervousness hit me, and I swallowed hard, hoping the food and coffee weren't going to come back up.
"I can smell your fear." Justice glanced up.
"I'd be stupid not to be scared." I met his gaze across the table.
"Actually, you have nothing to fear. While the change will be hard on you, you're going to have a better life once it's done. You'll have the pack to help you. You won't be on your own anymore. Kurt will help you find a job, get you a place to stay, and help you get on your feet. If you ask me, it's better than the life you've been living."
It might be, but it was hard to think about that when all I could focus on was the fact that I was about to be bitten by some strange creature and forced into becoming one. "I'm having trouble seeing that far ahead. All I can think about is today."
"I won't hurt you." Justice sat back.
"You saying the bite doesn't hurt?"
"I'm sure it does, but not enough to worry about it the way you are. Your scent is so sour that it's almost hard to be around you."
"You can really smell my emotions?"
"As a wolf, you'll find you can smell everything. Not only will you know someone's emotions from their scent, once you join the pack, you'll be able to feel them too. Some stronger than others, but we're all connected in a way since we can read each other's base emotions."
"So there is no privacy?"
"No, it's not like that. We respect each other and don't intrude, but there are times it's a good thing. If one of us is in trouble, then it's good the rest of us can know to help. As alpha, Kurt feels the emotions stronger than anyone else, but we can all feel distress or severe anger from each other through the pack link." Justice stood and poured himself another cup of coffee. "And when you find a mate, you will feel each other's emotions almost as easily as you feel your own. The mating link is stronger than the alpha or pack link."
"What about the link you'll have with me after you bite me?"
"I'm not really sure how serious that will be. I've never bitten anyone before to know. I'm told I'll be able to sense your feelings enough to know if you're going to cause problems or if you are in pain. This is all going to be new for both of us. While I've been told what happens, what to expect, I really won't know until it happens."
I sighed. "I don't know if I can do this."
"One way or another, it happens today."
"You mean you bite me or kill me?"
Justice shrugged.
Was it really that easy for them to kill? Justice acted as if he could kill me and just go about his day as if nothing happened. I wondered if death might be the easier choice. I didn't want to be some freakish wolf shifter. The whole thing freaked me out, even though Justice tried to make it sou
nd like it would be a good thing.
"You have to decide. We need to get this done. The sooner we do it, the sooner you'll be able to get on with your life, if that's what you choose."
"You act like killing me is no big deal."
"It isn't. If I have to kill you to protect the pack, then that's what I'll do. I think you're stupid if you choose to die when you've been given the chance at a life that many people would long for, but the choice is yours."
"How would you kill me?"
Justice sighed.
"Seriously, I need to know."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah. I mean, I should know if death would be less painful."
"Death would be less painful than the change, but it would also be final. The change won't be easy, but the life you'll have after will be amazing. I know you're scared of what you don't know, but there isn't a way to explain it all to you. It's something you have to experience. Every part of you will be stronger. Your senses will intensify. You'll be ten times the man you are now. If you choose death, I'll tear your neck out and then bury you. It will be quick and you will be dead before you really suffer, but death is final. Is that really what you want?"
It wasn't, but it was easier.
"Listen, there is no point in drawing this out. I'm going to run up to my room for a minute. When I come down, we'll head outside and do this. Make up your mind, because once we're out the door, you'll need to give me a decision. If you don't make one, I'll make it for you." He stood, meeting my gaze over the table. "Letting you sit and worry about this all day isn't good for either of us. Let's just get it done." He stalked away.
I listened to his heavy footsteps going upstairs as I tried to think of a way to escape all of this. I was so fucked, and all because I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I hadn't attacked the wolves. It wasn't my fault I'd found out about them. I shouldn't be blamed for all this.
Appetite gone, I took the dishes to the sink and rinsed them. I stared out the window over the sink and tried to think about what I wanted. I really didn't want to die. As easy as that choice would be, I couldn't do that. I needed to see this through, but I wasn't sure the fear wouldn't kill me first. I had to trust Justice, but that wasn't easy. I'd been there when he'd been attacked. I hadn't stopped my friend from trying to kill him. How could I trust him now to have my best interest at heart? What if this was some horrible revenge plot he had?
"Ready?" Justice asked from behind me.
I turned, taking a deep breath. "You can't read thoughts, can you?"
He laughed. "I wish. That would make life easier. I hear that when you find your mate, you can almost read each other's thoughts, but as for the rest of us, no, we go by scent and hope for the best. Why, what were you thinking?"
I dropped my gaze to the floor.
"You think I'm going to hurt you?"
I shrugged.
"I'm not. It's not who I am. I'm pissed at everything that happened, and yes, there is a part of me that doesn't understand why Kurt didn't sentence you to death along with your friend, but he's my alpha, and his decisions are final. I won't argue them. I didn't need to offer to be the one to bite you, but I wanted to be the one who made sure you deserve the gift you've been offered. I want to make sure you aren't released on your own until we are sure you aren't going to try and fuck us over." Justice folded his arms over his thick chest. "So, what will it be?"
My heart pounded so hard I wondered if I'd have a heart attack before we did this. "It's not like there is a choice. I don't want to die."
Justice nodded. "And where would you like me to bite you?"
I swallowed hard. "I guess either my upper arm or shoulder. I don't want my legs hurt. I want to be able to move and walk after the bite."
"The shoulder is a good spot." Justice nodded toward the door. "Let's get this done." He turned and started to walk outside.
I hesitated, unsure if I could make my feet move to follow him.
"I don't want to get blood on my kitchen floor, but I will bite you here if you don't move," Justice called without looking back.
Fear consumed me as I forced myself to follow him. It was as if I was walking to my own execution, which honestly, I could still choose if I wanted. Fuck, this was so hard to do. I didn't want to give up my life. As lame as things were for me at the moment, I liked my simple life. Being changed into some monster was going to make things a lot harder for me. Despite what Justice promised, this was not going to better my life. I was being forced into living a life that would have to be kept secret. I would be limited on where I went, who I hung with. From all I could gather, I'd work for the pack and not have a choice in what I did. Everything sounded as if it was about the pack. I didn't want to be part of a group. I was used to being alone, doing my own thing.
The sun was high in the sky as I followed him into the yard. It was going to be another warm day, not that it would matter to me. I'd probably be suffering in pain all day after the bite.
"This is as good a spot as any." Justice looked around as if making sure we were really alone.
I didn't know what he was worried about. We were so far out in the middle of nowhere that it wouldn't matter. I doubted there was anyone around for miles. I turned to face Justice, trying to swallow back my fear. "So you just need to bite me?"
"Yep. There's something in the saliva that will pass into your bloodstream and cause you to change. As I said, it won't happen overnight. It can take weeks to happen, so don't expect any changes right away."
I fisted my hands to keep them from shaking, but it did no good. The rest of my body trembled, giving away just how scared I was.
Justice pulled his shirt over his head. "I'm going to shift, then I'll slowly come closer and bite you. Take off your shirt."
I slowly pulled my shirt over my head and dropped it to the ground as I watched Justice kick off his shoes, then step out of his pants. Naked, he had an amazing body. Muscle covered every inch of him. He was easily three times the size of me, towering over me like some giant. I swallowed hard.
"Okay, now this would be easier if you sit on the ground and just let me come up to you. I'll be as gentle as I can, but the deeper I bite, the more saliva will transfer into your blood, hopefully making the change easier on you." He narrowed his eyes. "You okay?"
I shook my head.
"How about I shift and give you a minute to get used to my wolf?"
I nodded, thinking that was a good idea. Things were happening so fast all I wanted to do was run. My knees shook as I watched Justice shift. It was so quick I almost missed it. One minute he was man, then next he was a huge black wolf with flecks of red running through his coat. He didn't seem aggressive, but the size of him was overwhelming and I swallowed hard as I stared at the beast in front of me.
It was too much. I was too scared. Without even thinking about it, I shook my head. "I can't." I turned and started to run, petrified at the thought of the large wolf sinking its teeth into me, but even more scared at the thought of becoming something like him.
I ran as fast as I could without knowing where I was going. I just needed to escape. I was probably going to end up dead for what I was doing, but I didn't care. I couldn't do this.
A loud growl had me glancing back over my shoulder, and I screamed at what I saw. Justice, in his wolf form, was leaping at me, his huge body a good five feet off the ground. I kept running, but it wasn't enough. Justice hit me hard, his wolf pushing me forward, forcing my body to the ground. I tried to scream again, but all the air had been taken from my body, and the weight of the wolf against my back kept me from taking much of a breath. Tears stained my cheeks as I cried, sure that this was it. I was going to die.
The wolf's breath washed over the back of my neck as I tried to escape the weight of his body, but I couldn't move. I kept my eyes closed, waiting for death to come.
When the bite came, it was sharp and painful, digging into the back of my shoulder like a million knives hitting me all at once
. I screamed, but without air, it was hardly more than a hollow gasp. It was over as quickly as it happened, and the weight of the wolf was gone, freeing me.
I didn't move. Too scared to face Justice and find out just how angry he was that I'd ran from him.
"It's done. You can get up now." Justice's voice came from behind me.
I was shocked to hear him and rolled over quickly, surprised to find Justice in his human form again, standing several feet away from me, watching me closely. Pain raced through my shoulder, and blood ran down my skin. Looking back, I couldn't see the wound, but there was no doubt it was there. It hurt like a motherfucker.
"Come on. Let's get you into the house so we can bandage that." Justice offered his hand.
I stared at it, too shocked to move. "You bit me."
"That was the whole idea, wasn't it?" Justice raised a brow. "Did you think running from me would stop it from happening? I'm a wolf. We like to chase and hunt. When you ran, it just got my wolf excited to chase. He wanted to let you keep running so we could hunt for you, but I wasn't about to play games right now. This was too important."
"Hunt me?"
"Like when we chase a deer or other prey." Justice shrugged. "Hunting is what wolves do when we feed."
I swallowed hard.
"The hard part is over. Now we just wait." Justice again offered his hand. "Let's go get you cleaned up."
I stared at him, taking in how comfortable he was standing naked in front of me. I couldn't imagine being that at ease being naked around anyone, let alone outside where anyone could drive up at any minute. "How bad is it?" I tried to look over my shoulder at the wound again.
Justice moved around me and bent down. His fingers traced around the area that felt as if it was on fire. "It's not bad. It looks like any other bite I've seen. It will heal. It's lower than I wanted to bite you. I hoped to get the top of your shoulder."
"I thought you'd kill me."
"You don't want to die. You're scared, not suicidal. When you ran, my wolf was happy to take chase. My wolf knew the goal was to bite you, and that's what he did. We do need to get this cleaned up. I took a good chunk out of your skin, and you're bleeding harder than I wanted you to. It's nothing dangerous, but we do need to get some pressure on this and get it covered. Until you change, it can still get infected, and that's the last thing you need on top of the other symptoms you're going to have."