Changed

by E. M. Leya

  My wolf stirred, hungry for his taste, looking forward to the hard bite I'd take from his skin when we came. "We should have gone to the bedroom before we started this. I'm not sure we'll make it now." I moved to him, not taking him in my arms yet, but I got close enough our cocks touched as we moved our hips.

  I stared down at the two of us, his cock rubbing against mine as the scent of our mixed arousal filled the room. I'd never dreamed I would want anyone the way Mark made me want him. There was such need to be with him. It scared me at times to think he could refuse me still. Turn away and leave me as if this mating meant nothing to him. The pain of just the thought was enough to almost make me cry out in despair.

  "What is it?" Mark looked concerned.

  "Nothing." I forced the thought from my mind.

  "Liar. I could smell your sadness."

  "It was nothing. Just wondered for a second how I could ever live without you by my side. How hard it would be if you left me."

  Mark paled. "That isn't going to happen. It would kill me to leave you as well. You have to know that. You have to know that I couldn't walk away from you. My wolf would refuse. I'd refuse. You mean everything to us, Tavish. I might have fought the mating at first, but I didn't understand. I'm not going anywhere."

  I wanted to ask why he wouldn't take the final step, but I held back. "I know that. The thought just hit me for a second. I would die without you by my side." I kissed him hard to end the conversation. I didn't want to go there right now. I needed to focus on us together. On him being here in my arms right now. I could only hope he never changed his mind about us.

  The kiss was enough to build the desire between us even higher, and we stroked and touched each other in the way we'd learned to do together. I was aware of every inch of his body and knew each place that would draw out a moan or make his back arch, just as he knew mine.

  I wasn't shocked at all when he got to his knees, bracing his arms on the floor, and offering his ass to me. The need was animalistic. There was no stopping it, no slowing down.

  I scraped my fingers down his spine before cupping his ass cheeks in my palms. His balls were heavy between his thighs, and I teased them for a second before I pressed him open, exposing his hole.

  With one hand I guided myself to his entrance, and with the other, I gripped his hip to keep him in place. The initial thrust was hard, causing him to arch, but that only caused him to take me deeper.

  Beneath his body, he used one hand to work his own cock while the other supported him, helping to steady him through my violent thrusts. When it got like this, I was more animal than human. My wolf was right there with me, taking his satisfaction in the pleasure the same way I did.

  "Tavish." Mark's voice was more a growl than words, letting me know his wolf was right there with him, enjoying what we were sharing together.

  The thrusts and slams of our bodies were violent as sweat covered each of us. His fingers dug into the carpet as mine dug into his skin, trying to find a grip for the current of pleasure we were each experiencing. I fought back a howl, reminding myself where we were, but my head arched back and my mouth opened wide just the same. I was going to lose my mind inside him. It was only a matter of time before I was going to be unable to deal with the pleasure Mark could bring me. Nothing in life felt as good as being with him.

  Unable to hold back, I let myself come, filling him with my seed as I leaned forward while at the same time drawing him back so I could sink my teeth into his shoulder. I bit hard, tasting the blood from his skin while at the same time feeling his body convulse as his own orgasm hit him. He howled softly, still rocking his ass over my cock as we both rode out the pleasure that shot through us.

  When it was over, he fell forward and I went with him, my weight pressing him to the floor as the knot held me inside him. I licked softly over the wound on his shoulder, easing the pain and cleaning it. "I love you so much. I'll never get enough of you."

  Mark breathed heavily. "Good, because I'd have to hunt you down and insist you change your mind if you ever did." His muscles still clenched around me.

  "Need me to roll on my side?" I asked, worried my weight was too much for him.

  "No, I like you covering me." He reached an arm back to caress my side. "They say the ceremony makes sex better, but I can't see how. It will kill us if it gets better."

  I laughed, glad he was thinking of the ceremony. "It will be amazing. I can't wait to see what everyone talks about. I want that closeness with you. I want to share everything with you. You'll be able to know what I'm thinking, feeling. There won't be any doubt how much you mean to me. It will be clear once you can get inside my head and see what I'm feeling."

  "You're not scared that I might know everything?"

  I kissed his shoulder. "No. I want you to know everything. I'd tell you everything now if I could. I just don't always know how to say the things I want to. I've never been good at letting others in. With you, it feels natural to share all of me. Like you, I've only heard the rumors of how it is between mates, but I'm looking forward to finding out firsthand."

  "Do you hate me for not being ready to take that step?"

  "God, no. I understand it's overwhelming. As much as I want to complete the ceremony with you, I'm patient. I'll wait until you're ready." It wasn't as if I had a choice. Waiting was all I could do. I wasn't going to leave him over the issue.

  We lay in silence until the knot eased and I was able to pull out of him. I rolled to his side, drawing him up against me. "It's early, but how about a nap? Then when we wake, we can shower and head out to dinner somewhere. I'd like to take you out tonight."

  "Showing me off to your fans?"

  I grinned. "Making sure they all know who I belong with." I slowly got up and held out my hand. "The floor's hard. Let's find the bed."

  Taking my hand, he rose from the floor, pausing to kiss me softly before letting me lead him to bed.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

  Mark

  I tried not to fidget as the plane came in for a landing. I'd talked to my grandparents only long enough to ask if we could visit and arrange a time. I'd heard the relief in my grandfather's voice when I'd called. It helped ease some of my nervousness to know they really did seem to want to know me, but it still didn't answer the question of where were they when I needed them?

  Making the call had been the hardest thing I'd ever done, and if it hadn't been for Tavish by my side, I probably would have chickened out.

  "It's a short drive to their home. Do you need to stop anywhere before we get there?" Tavish asked as the wheels touched down.

  I took a deep breath. "Not unless you do. Since they sent a car for us, I'm guessing it's best to just go straight there." I'd been shocked when my grandparents offered to send a car. This was a world I wasn't used to. Between Tavish and the private jet and my grandparents having a driver, I was way out of my comfort zone.

  "I was looking at a map of the area around their home. They don't live too far from a couple of places we can go run if we want later." Tavish was trying to distract me.

  "Let's see how long we're staying here first. If it's too tense, we'll head home tomorrow. I just want some answers from them and maybe learn a little about my mom."

  Tavish nodded. "It's all up to you. I have to be back in Los Angeles to meet the tour bus in a week, but other than that I'll follow your lead. I have nothing I need to do until then."

  I focused on grabbing my bag and getting off the plane, glad when I could take several gulps of fresh air. One thing about being with Tavish and taking a private plane that I loved was how fast we were off the plane and heading to the car that was waiting for us.

  "Mr. Westburg?" An older gentleman in a black suit smiled at me as we made our way to the car.

  "Yes." I smiled at him, then stopped because of the odd look he was giving me. "Is something wrong?"

  "You look just like her." The man took a step forward. "Forgive me if I'm out of line, but you resemble yo
ur mother. I can't believe how much so."

  I touched my cheek. "I do?" Then curious, I asked, "you knew my mother?"

  "Of course, I did. I've worked for the Shell's for many years. It was devastating for all of us when she died." The man reached for my bag. "You have her hair and eyes." The man smiled before turning to Tavish and taking his bag. "Let me be the first to welcome you to Denver. I'm George."

  "Thank you," Tavish said as he reached for my hand to lead me to the back door of the car.

  I slid in and was glad when Tavish moved in beside me. My stomach was so unsettled with nerves, I worried I'd be sick. "This is going to be harder than I thought."

  Tavish kissed my cheek. "You're finally going to have the answers you've needed. Take a deep breath. I won't leave you alone unless you ask me to. If you can't handle things, we can leave at any time."

  "Thanks." I stared out the window as we started to drive. It had been years since I'd been back to Colorado, and the fact that I was now in the same city as my father caused a chill to run down my spine. I tried to tell myself he was no longer a threat to me. I was a wolf now, and I could tear out his throat in seconds if I needed to. Not that I would. That would get me killed, but I liked reminding myself that I had the power if I needed it to defend myself. "Have you been here before?"

  Tavish nodded. "There aren't many places I haven't been at least once. Denver is always on the tour schedule. We come here at least every other year. It's a nice enough place, but a bit too big for my tastes."

  "Says the man who has a home in Los Angeles." I laughed.

  "That's all for show. Home is in Terrin Pass. It's where my heart is. Well, at least part of my heart. You hold most of it now."

  "Aww, that was sweet." I grinned as I pecked his cheek.

  "I know. I never used to be that way. You bring out the sweetness in me."

  I rolled my eyes. "Even though I grew up here, I don't know the city well. My dad never let me leave the house other than to go to school. All my friends would go to baseball and football games and stuff, but I never got to."

  "We can do all of that together. I'm a huge sports fan. Colorado even has a great hockey team."

  "Once you get the tour done, we'll plan something." I needed to remember we'd be on the road with the band for the next few months. I leaned against Tavish, watching the landscape change as we drove and passed the large skyscrapers before moving into a more mountainous area. There were large homes, set back in the trees that reminded me a lot of Tavish and Justice's home. I missed being there.

  Tavish stayed quiet as if he knew I needed to be alone in my thoughts. I loved how he always seemed to give me what I needed. It was eerie how in tune we were to each other, and to think it would only get stronger with the ceremony was hard to believe. There had been nights in the last week where I'd almost asked to do the ceremony, but something was still holding me back. I wasn't sure I was ready to take that final step, as much as I trusted Tavish, it was as if there was something about the ceremony that would change the way things were between us and I feared that. At first, I feared giving Tavish more control over me, giving up my independence, but now, it was different. I trusted Tavish not to control me, but something about sealing our lives together forever in such a drastic way had me on edge. It was more than a marriage. That you could always escape from. Feelings and emotions would fade in a human commitment, but with wolves, it was forever. Even if we parted ways, the feelings wouldn't change. What if he left me? What if I wasn't enough for him?

  Most of the time I was sure that would never happen. I believed that he loved me. Then there were moments when I felt like I was still a young kid, trying to avoid my father's fists, trying to understand the world, trying to believe that my life had any value. I hated how insecure I sometimes felt.

  The car turned into a long driveway, and I stared up at the house in front of us. It was a huge, cabin-style home, that looked way too large to house just my grandparents. It was clear they had money, but just how much I wasn't sure.

  As the car came to a stop, Tavish gave my thigh a soft squeeze. "I'm with you for all this. Remember that."

  "I will. Thank you." I kissed him.

  When the car door opened and I followed Tavish out, I took another hard breath before looking up at the house as the front door opened. An older man stepped out, followed by a dark-haired woman. They looked like any other couple, only I could see a resemblance to myself in the woman's features. It was clear that my mother's side of the family had strong genes. They were both dressed in jeans and casual tops, both with grins on their faces as they came down the front steps.

  "Mark?" The woman, my grandmother, came forward. "I'm Susan Shell, your grandmother." She stepped close, her arms open.

  I gave her the expected hug as a wave of emotions hit me. "It's nice to meet you." I tried to smile.

  "And I'm John Shell." The man offered his hand.

  "Thank you for allowing us to come visit." I shook his hand, then turned to Tavish. "This is my fiancé Tavish."

  "The pleasure is ours." They greeted Tavish. "We'd know you from the news. Lead singer of the band, Destiny." Susan grinned.

  "Are you fans?" Tavish asked with a sly smile.

  "I can't say we are, but that is probably because of our age differences." John laughed. "We've never heard your work, but you can't miss your face on the news. Your engagement has taken a lot of people by surprise."

  I wondered what they would say if they knew how old Tavish really was. "It was quick. I'm sure his fans are upset." I smiled at Tavish.

  "I'd say they are more curious about you." Tavish took my hand.

  "You'll have to tell us how you met," Susan said. "Come on inside. I'm sure you'd like to relax after all the travel."

  We followed them into the large home. Like the outside, the interior was decorated in a country flare. While the furnishings were high-end, the feel was as if you were stepping into a cozy cabin. Other than the pure size of the place, it was comfortable and welcoming.

  "We assumed you'd be sharing a room, but if we are wrong, we have another available." Susan gestured to a large bedroom at the top of the steps we'd just walked up.

  "We'll be sharing." Tavish smiled. "This is perfect. Thank you."

  "You go ahead and relax. If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask. We'll be downstairs. We can talk when you're ready." John had his arm around his wife. "We're looking forward to explaining some things and hopefully rebuilding a relationship with you."

  I tensed, but nodded. "Thank you. Me too. We'll freshen up and be down shortly." I wanted nothing more than to slam the bedroom door and hide out there the rest of the night with Tavish. It wasn't that my grandparents made me uncomfortable, but I was still angry that they'd walked out of my life so many years ago without a backward glance.

  Once they were gone, I did close the door before turning to Tavish. "They seem nice enough."

  "I only smell regret and sadness on them. How are you holding up?" Tavish's arms came around me.

  "I'm okay. I want answers, but I'm almost scared to get them. I'm not sure what excuse they can give to make ignoring me all these years okay." I rested my head on his shoulder. "I hope coming here wasn't a mistake."

  "Getting closure is never a mistake, even if it hurts. It's better to have the answers than always wonder why." Tavish kissed my forehead. "Let's grab a quick shower, change clothes, then we can see what they have to say. As I said before, we don't have to stay any longer than you want to."

  "I'm glad you're here with me."

  "There's nowhere else I'd rather be." He pulled back. "You want to share a shower?"

  "Yeah, that would be perfect."

  The shower was quick, and for the first time ever, it didn't lead to more. I think Tavish knew I just needed his closeness and wasn't up for sex at the moment. I had a million thoughts running through my head and even more questions. I'd worked so hard on leaving the past behind, but now it was as if it was all coming b
ack, forcing me to face what I'd run away from.

  Tavish didn't say much as we dressed, staying the silent, steady support that I needed. As we finally walked back downstairs to meet with my grandparents, his hand held mine firmly, reminding me that I wasn't alone in this and that no matter what happened here, he would be by my side when it was over.

  "Did you have everything you need?" Susan glanced up as we walked into the kitchen.

  I smiled at both Susan and John, who were sitting at the kitchen table. "Everything was perfect. Thank you."

  "Can I get you a drink? Lemonade, tea, coffee?" Susan stood.

  "Just water for me." Tavish smiled.

  "Same for me as well." I made my way over to the table, taking a seat without being invited.

  Tavish sat beside me. "You have an amazing home."

  "Thank you. We've talked about downsizing, but it's hard to let go of the home where you raised your family," John said. "We have a lot of memories here."

  "My mother was raised here?" I asked.

  "She was. In fact, you've been here before. She would bring you over to visit when you were a baby. Way too young to remember, but you used to love crawling around the backyard while your mother and Susan chatted." John smiled at his wife. "We have photographs to show you, but figured it was better to let you get settled before bringing them out."

  I swallowed hard, wondering how something I couldn't remember could stir such emotion inside me. "Thanks, I'd love to see them later, but I do have questions first."

  "Of course. We figured you might." Susan set two glasses of ice water down before retaking her seat beside her husband. "First, tell us about you. Are you okay? Happy in life?"

  I glanced at Tavish before looking back at her. "It's been hard the last few years. I lived mostly on the streets since I ran away, doing odd jobs to survive. I made a few friends along the way who helped me. It wasn't until I met Tavish that things really started to change."

  "How did the two of you meet?" John asked.