I stared at him with horrified eyes and didn't breathe easier until he woke up, gasping for breath. Finally, he sat up and lifted his hand. It was whole, unblemished. Kiernan heaved a sigh of relief and dropped back onto the bed.
“Holy shit, that was some nightmare,” he murmured.
I'd seen enough. The ghost kid had told me about the corruption I could wreak on humans. And now I’d seen it with my own eyes. I'd also learned that Kiernan had been alright until our skins touched. And it had been Kiernan's incubus heritage that had given him power over me. I didn’t dare enter Amber’s dream because there was no way I’d survive seeing her but not being able to touch her.
That left Lance who was yawning by the window. It would only be a matter of time until I’d get my chance with him. And while I found him attractive, I didn’t have the bond with him as I had with Kiernan. I’d be able to enter his dream and deliver my warning without any danger to either of us.
14
Amber
I’d spent a good hour transcribing all the details of the ritual as I understood from the ancient book. This must have been what Denholm had wanted me to know.
The text described how everybody taking part would be protected against the energy drain and allow them to tap into the power of the pentagram. But how were we to do that if we were missing one of our group? I told my inner voice to shut up. We were four now, but there was nothing stopping me from finding a fifth.
I suppressed a shudder. I wasn’t interested in replacing Julian. Not ever. There’d only ever be the three men I had now and one I would never have again. But if I had to, I’d fuck a new guy to save ourselves and avenge Julian.
I got up and collected some of the ritual components. It required a crystal to represent each of us. Rummaging under Kiernan’s bed, I found his spell satchel with basic ingredients. There was an emerald to represent both his heritage and his earth magic. A tiger’s eye would do nicely for Macha, just in case. A fire agate for Lance, and a clear quartz for myself. At the bottom of the bag, there was a spirit quartz. I held up the purple crystal, remembering Beth telling me it carried the gift of universal love and rebirth, a stone to overcome grief and death.
Kiernan groaned in the bed above me, as if trapped in a nightmare. I quickly stuck the crystals into my jeans pocket. Should I wake him? But before I could shake him, he sat up. Exhaling harshly, he fell back onto the bed, rubbing his face.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Yeah. Just a bad dream.”
“You want to talk about it?”
“No. It was stupid. Just wishful thinking.”
I took my notes and sat down next to him. “If you’re awake, I’d like to run something past you.”
“Sure.” He waited expectantly.
“Well, you know the book Denholm gave me? It mentions a ritual that’s supposed to enhance our powers. The way it’s described, it sounds like it would stop any energy drains between us and make us strong enough to take on Farkas.”
Kiernan groaned. “Come on. Do you still want to go after her?”
I stopped myself from snapping at him. “What if she comes after us? Do you think we could take her? Her and whatever reinforcement she brings from the Fae?”
Kiernan sighed. “Okay. Tell me about the ritual.”
“It's not very difficult. We have to prepare ourselves through meditation and something called a Soul Weave. Apparently, once we’ve done that, we’d all have to have sex with each other—“
Kiernan interrupted, “At least that part sounds like fun.”
I appreciated his attempt to put me at ease. “Yes, that’s going to be the fun part. Each person has to give and receive the essences of the others. One person is called the Vessel and needs to be filled with the seed of the other four.”
“Four? And the vessel? That’s five, Amber.”
“I know that. I can count.”
“So it’s not going to work, is it?”
“It can’t be that hard to pick up another person.”
Kiernan pressed his lips together. “I don’t know. I mean, I don’t mind sharing you with Lance and Macha. If anything, Macha has more of a claim on you than we do. But a stranger? I don’t think I can do that. Not after…”
He didn't have to finish. Julian's loss was a neverending reminder that we weren’t complete anymore. How we were all broken, and time hadn’t managed to smooth the jagged edges yet.
The door opened, and Macha strolled in. His clothes were covered in dirt, and there were leaves stuck to his curly hair. “Where have you been? Did you roll in the dirt with the squirrels?” I asked, laughing despite my sadness.
“No squirrels. Just play.”
“Your speech is coming along great,” Kiernan said.
“Did you find something to eat?” I asked.
Macha’s eyes lit up. “No, but I remember. Tuna in fridge.”
He smiled at an area just above my head before leaving the bedroom. I looked up, but there was nothing. A breeze moved a few strands of my hair. The windows were probably drafty.
A yowl from the kitchen caused both of us to jump off the bed and sprint into the next room. The fridge door was open, and Macha clawed at something on his face.
“Did you hurt yourself?” I asked breathlessly.
Kiernan burst out laughing. “Oh my God. His tongue’s stuck.”
He was right. Macha’s tongue had gotten trapped between the sharp edge of the can and the half-open lid. Carefully, I wiggled the container until Macha was free. “For the last time. You’re not a cat. And why, in God’s name, would you stick your tongue into a can of tuna?”
Macha rubbed his tongue with the back of his hand, nodding sheepishly at my words. Then he pointed at his mouth. “Ow.”
I tried so hard not to roll my eyes. Macha was probably only a little younger than my other men, but seriously, he behaved like a child. Kiernan took a closer look at his tongue. “Yeah, there’s a little cut. You’ll be fine, big boy.”
Affectionately, he carded his fingers through Macha’s hair until the man purred and pushed his head under Kiernan’s chin. Macha sought my gaze and gave me a watery smile. My heart went out to him. I shouldn’t be so harsh on him. It couldn’t be easy to adjust after spending however long trapped in a feline body.
I bent and kissed his lips, gently, not wanting to cause any more pain. “There, my kitty cat.”
He threw me a dirty look but didn’t protest the pet name.
* * *
Julian
* * *
I waited until Lance was asleep before I tried again. The urgency was burning in the back of my mind. The FBMA agents would surely be on their way soon, and even if they didn't attack at night, they would swarm our hideout come morning. We only had a few hours to get ready to run.
I chuckled as I realized I still considered myself part of the group, even in my current, inconvenient state. As before, I hovered full-length above Lance and allowed myself to sink until I merged with his consciousness.
My God. It couldn’t have been any different from where I’d found Kiernan. I didn't know if this was part of Lance’s past, or if he was trapped in a nightmare. I stood next to him on an ice float. In theory, I shouldn't have been able to feel the burn from the freezing temperatures, but this was Lance’s dream. My rules didn't apply here, it seemed.
Lance shivered so hard, his teeth sounded like rapid fire. He was barefoot, topless, only dressed in his underwear. He didn't pay any attention to me. Could he not see me?
I reached out and shook his shoulder. “Lance. Hey, buddy. Can you see me?”
Lance didn't say anything, but he sneaked a look at me. I tried again. “Hey. What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you stuck here?”
Through chattering teeth, Lance murmured something I couldn’t make out.
“What?”
“I deserve it.”
Okay, this time I’d heard him. “Sorry, I don't understand. What do you deserve?”
“I deserve being here.”
He still didn't make any sense. “Did the cold freeze your brain? What do you mean you deserve it? Deserve what?”
“It’s my fault you’re gone. If I’d only been better or faster, I could have saved you.”
I shook my head to clear my ears. “Come again? That makes no sense. I should know. I was there. There was nothing you could have done. The other guy was just too fast.”
Lance’s lips pulled up but it wasn’t an amused smile. It was a bitter smirk. “You always tried to make me feel better. That’s what I loved about you.”
I could tell I wasn’t getting through to him. So I focused on why I was here in the first place. “I have to warn you. The FBMA—“
Lance cut me off. “I’m going to make it up to you. And to Amber and Kiernan. I know what you meant to each other.”
Before I could respond, he moved to the edge of the ice float. The water beyond our precarious surface looked so cold, gray and still, it reminded me of an icy shroud. If a person fell in, they wouldn’t live long. The water would burn my skin, paralyze my muscles, until my own bodyweight pulled me down, away from the light. I shivered, forcing myself to stop being so morose. My death had been traumatic enough without visualizing an even more terrible demise.
Lance hadn’t stopped walking. I shouted, “Stop, Lance. What are you doin—,” but I couldn’t even finish my sentence when he stepped off the edge.
“It’s just a dream.” I had to say it out loud to remind myself. Was Lance suicidal? He’d never struck me as the self-sacrificing type, but this was his dream. He did what he wanted to do. Staring at the empty ocean, I hoped he’d emerge, but there was no sign of him. Only a couple of air bubbles, and then the sea was glassy again. Would he stay dead because he died in his dream?
I groaned. “Oh, no. Lance, you idiot.”
Before I could leave Lance’s body, I was propelled out of him so fast, I hit the wall and went straight through it. Was that it? Did he die? My chest contracted at the thought, but when I returned, Lance had woken up. He stared at the ceiling with dead eyes, an expression of self-loathing on his face.
I groaned. Once again, I hadn’t been able to deliver my warning. The ever-present rage boiled up, and I screamed so loudly, the bulbs in the light fitting burst with a bright “ping.” Kiernan stood up from his place by the window and examined the busted light.
“Old house, I suppose,” he murmured.
I willed myself to calm down, or I wouldn’t be able to enter anybody else’s dreams. For the rest of the night, I meditated with my new friends, the spiders. Pushing non-existent breaths out of my ghostly lungs, the familiar movements helped me level out.
Outside, it was still pitch dark, and the sun wouldn’t rise for several more hours. Kiernan was staring into the night, but even if he’d gone back to sleep, I wouldn’t have tried him again. His incubus nature would have latched on to me, and it didn’t feel right to be seduced in my current state.
Lance was awake, but his self-hatred scared me. Witnessing him killing himself had been awful. That left Amber and Macha. I flitted through the house, but Macha was gone again. The toilet flushed, and Amber walked out of the bathroom. She was dressed in a man’s T-shirt that fell just above her knees. Her tousled hair and sleepy eyes made me ache to hold and protect her.
She joined Kiernan by the window and sat on his lap. Kissing him, she pressed her body against his, and for a few moments, they held on, seeking comfort in each other’s company. I drifted closer to hear what they were whispering.
“I’ve seen him before, you know?” Kiernan said.
“Really? As a human, you mean?”
“Yeah. I saw him plenty with you when he was your pet.”
Amber slapped him playfully. “No need to be so catty.”
They dissolved into giggles before turning serious again. Amidst all the pain and chaos, it soothed me to see them being playful.
“I can’t remember where I saw him, except that I did. But when I met him, his hair was much shorter.”
“Well, if you remember anything else, let me know. Might be important.” Amber yawned. She hugged him tightly, then slipped under the cover and nestled up close to Lance. Lance turned around and pulled her in against his chest.
After what the voices had told me, I didn’t want to try entering Amber’s dreams. But I was really running out of time. A thought occurred to me. Maybe if I focused hard enough, I might be able to follow Macha’s pull. I face-palmed for missing the obvious, but my hand went through my head. Which was weird. So I stopped.
I closed my eyes and focused. There was a big pull toward Amber, a slightly lighter, but still strong pull toward Kiernan. Lance’s presence also tugged on me, stronger than I’d expected. We hadn’t been that close before I died, but maybe visiting him in his dream had strengthened our bond.
I tuned out the strands I’d already identified. And there was a fourth pull. Not as strong as the other three, but I could easily focus on it. It had to be Macha. It was weak, but I’d be able to follow it.
Gliding through the walls of the house, I floated through the night air. The further I moved away from the other three, the more Macha’s presence acted like a homing beacon. Within seconds, I was back on the academy grounds. Macha’s pull led me along a familiar route into the library and towards the door I’d entered only recently.
Seriously? Had I mistaken Macha’s presence for the dead student’s ghost in the hidden library room? I nearly turned back when I heard a scratching noise on the stairs leading up from the basement. Somebody was there who wasn’t a ghost.
I lifted myself up to the ceiling, not keen on having anybody walk through me again. Not that I felt it. It just seemed wrong. There was no illumination other than tendrils of moonlight sneaking in through the cuts in the walls. I didn’t recognize the black outline of a man until he came closer. His eyes reflected the light like an animal’s. It had to be Macha.
I called out, “Hey, Macha.”
He nearly lost his footing on the stairs, but like the body he’d inhabited for so long, he caught his balance easily. When he focused on me, he smiled. “Julian. Why are you here?”
He spoke slowly with an odd sibilant sound, but it had mellowed to an accent rather than a speech impediment.
“Thank God I found you. I’ve been trying to warn Amber and the guys at the house. There are FBMA agents on campus, and they’re going to search the forest. It’s no longer safe. Will you tell them?”
His eyes widened. “Oh, sssshit.”
“What are you doing here anyway?” I asked.
“I thought the same. I wanted a safer hideout as well. I don't like the house.”
“And? Did you find somewhere?”
“Here.”
Did he mean the tiny room at the bottom? “But it's too small. It would never hold four people.”
Macha’s teeth gleamed as he grinned. “There’s another room behind a secret door. It would hide all of us.”
I hadn’t seen any door, but then I’d been distracted by the dead kid. “What about Denholm? Won’t he find us in there?”
“I don’t think so. That door hasn’t been opened for a long time. I don’t think he knows about it.”
15
Julian
I wanted to get back to the house as fast as possible, but I had to keep stopping and wait for Macha. He was nervous like a cat on a hot tin roof—pun intended—to know there were FBMA agents about. We had just crossed the square when Macha stiffened.
“Somebody’s watching us,” he hissed.
I floated higher but couldn’t see anybody. “Are you sure?”
He nodded rapidly. “In the window, second floor.”
Flitting to where Macha was pointing, I came face-to-face with a man I’d never seen on campus before. His attire screamed “Federal Agent” from the suit to the expensive binoculars. He was speaking into a mic, and while I couldn't hear his words through the window, it
was clear he had eyes on Macha.
“Oh, shit.” I yelled across the campus. “Macha. Run! They’re coming.”
Macha yowled and broke into a sprint, aiming to reach the safety of the forest. I flew after him. “No, not that way. What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
I might as well have yelled at a rock in full flight. He must have heard me, but he didn’t respond and only ran quicker. Two men sprinted after him. Macha was faster than they were, but he was leading them into the direction of the house.
I flitted to the hideout, frustrated at my inability to communicate with my friends. I could see them, but I couldn’t warn them. It was infuriating. Then I went back again, shouting at Macha to run into a different direction. There was panic in his eyes, and he paid no attention to me. Whatever inner demons were chasing him, he was determined to find safety with the people he loved.
At least he was fast enough to leave the agents in his wake. When he tore open the door, he was gasping for breath.
Kiernan was the first to react. “What the hell, Macha? What's happening?”
Macha shouted, “They’re coming. They’re right behind me.”
Amber and Lance jumped out of bed. The color was draining out of Amber's face. “Macha. Calm down. Who is coming?”
Macha shouted again, “The FBMA. They’re coming.”
Kiernan grabbed him by the throat. “Did you fucking lead them right here?”
Amber grabbed his wrist and pulled his hand away from Macha’s throat. Macha was cowering, his face pale and terrified. “I didn't mean to. I just wanted to get away.”
Amber pulled on her pants. “It's okay. We’ll talk about it later. How much time do we have?”
“Not long. They were right behind me.”
Lance cursed and got dressed at top speed. Kiernan kept watch out of the window. The sun sent its red light above the tops of the firs. Soon, the house would be flooded with daylight. They had one chance to leave.
Second Chance Heat, a reverse harem magical academy HEA paranormal romance: Book Four of the Second Chance Academy Series Page 8