Fiasco Heights

by Zack Archer

  Beyond the archway lay what looked like a series of tunnels, catacombs lit by a luminous green light cast from a kind of algae on the wall. Entering the catacombs, we hooked a right and plunged down a shaft, hustling through a warren of twists and turns until we met another wall.

  “A dead end!” I shouted.

  Atlas shook his head. “Not for long.”

  The big man battered the wall, striking the stone, his fists becoming a blur until finally, he’d bashed a way out of the catacombs.

  We exited the underground space to see we were back out on the silver ocean. Circling around the keep, we crossed back to the boneyard, crouching, looking for any sign of the Morningstars.

  “We still have time,” Aurora said. “If we can make it back through the firewall we might be able to get out of here before they spot us.”

  Big fucking “if” I thought to myself.

  Atlas signaled for us to run, so we did. I sprinted faster than I have at any point in my life, tearing back across the boneyard, slowing only once to take a final look at the still-steaming corpse of the fallen dragon.

  We made our way over the Bridge of the Requiter and then we slid to a stop.

  We could see the wall of flames up ahead, maybe fifteen yards away.

  But there was somebody standing in front of the opening in the wall, blocking the way out.

  A young woman.

  She was tiny.

  She wore a skintight black singlet with two yellow lightning bolts that rose from a pair of thigh-high black boots with stiletto heels sharpened to a glimmering point. A red cape spread out behind her, fluttering in the breeze.

  She stepped out of the murk, and I got a better look at her.

  Her features were striking: high cheekbones, ruby-red lips, porcelain skin, and jet-black hair that looked like it had been styled with a switchblade.

  If we were back on Earth she’d probably be labeled “alternative,” the kind of girl who’s hot without trying to be hot (or who doesn’t give a damn about what you or I think classifies as hot, or not).

  She didn’t walk so much as levitate, warping the air around her as she hovered an inch or two off the ground.

  “W-who the hell is that?” I whispered.

  Aurora’s expression darkened. “That’s Big Dread.”

  I was shocked.

  In my mind, given the name Big Dread, I’d conjured up the image of a slobbering, Jabba the Hut type, a rotund bad guy, not some pocket-sized hottie who looked like she’d just escaped from a fashion show.

  “That little thing?” I asked, angling my head in Big Dread’s direction. “She doesn’t even look tall enough to go on a carnival ride.”

  “She punches above her weight,” Liberty said.

  “What’s her feat?” I asked.

  “Did you know that the marrow in bones has an energy solidity that is four times that of a pound of the explosive known as TNT?” Kaptain Khaos asked.

  “So what?”

  “So, Big Dread’s feat involves detonating the trapped energy in inanimate objects. She’s what we call a Trigger.”

  My gaze fell to the bones scattered across the ground, and the Kaptain nodded. “Don’t let this scare you, but we are kinda standing on top of the world’s biggest bomb,” he added.

  Fuck me up, down, and sideways, I thought to myself.

  Liberty pointed, and I looked back to see Big Dread lift her tiny arms and then violently bring them back down.

  Nothing happened for an instant.

  And then the villain’s eyes filmed over with white, and everything exploded.

  40

  The ground around us disintegrated in a series of percussive explosions that sent geysers of smoke and debris into the air. It felt like I was trapped in the middle of the world’s strongest undertow, the kinetic energy from the blasts ripping my body back through the air.

  The back blast sucked the oxygen from my lungs and I was launched thirty yards through the air.

  The plain of pumice rushed up to greet me and I crashed hard, my body carving a trench in the grit, before I rolled over and came to rest.

  There’s a sliding scale when it comes to pain.

  A “one” is something like a paper cut, while a “ten” is what you feel when you’re friggin’ arm is ripped out the socket. I was definitely experiencing an “eleven” or “twelve” at that moment.

  I snatched a breath of air and tasted fire and blood.

  The sky was obscured by smoke, and I heard shouts and snatches of conversation, but everything was muted as if I was listening while being trapped underwater.

  Anybody get the number of the car that just him me, I thought to myself.

  I pushed myself up and staggered like a new-born foal trying to find its legs.

  My eyes swung back, and I saw that a huge swath of land in front of Big Dread, the area where we’d been standing (roughly the size of half a football field), was hollowed out and fire-blackened.

  The bitch had literally blown us all up.

  But our suits had saved us and protected our vitals, because I could see the others rising from where they fell, battered, but still alive. Aurora was twenty feet away from me, the trap bottle still in her hands. She’d fallen on the bottle to protect it, but thank God they’d coated it with Akash or the explosions might have detonated the thing. Then again, maybe that’s what the villains wanted anyway. Maybe they were always intending to not only destroy the Caul, but the whole fucking universe.

  “Come, behold the works of The Dread, what desolations she has and will make of this place!” Big Dread shouted which I, frankly, thought was a little melodramatic.

  The supervillain drifted toward us. “How the mighty have fallen!” Big Dread sneered, her voice echoing over the boneyard. “Unable to complete a mission on your own, eh?!” I could feel her eyes on me like the dots from a sniper’s laser sight. “Relying on mere mortals for aid and comfort!”

  I flipped Big Dread a middle finger. “Fuck off!”

  “Who is this maggot?” Big Dread asked.

  “Maybe you’ve heard of me,” I said, squaring up, deepening my voice for maximum effect. “Night Fire.”

  She laughed. “What is a night…fire?”

  I looked over at Splinter. “What is a night fire by the way?”

  “It’s an unquenchable flame that burns even in the darkness,” Splinter replied, dusting himself off with a shrug.

  I nodded and looked back to Big Dread. “What he just said.”

  “That name is of no moment,” Big Dread scoffed.

  “Like yours is any better. For starters, it’s fucking redundant.”

  Big Dread’s eyebrows raised in mild curiosity and I continued. “I mean something that’s big is kinda inherently dreadful so in a way—”

  “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Big Dread screamed.

  Her gaze narrowed and a vulpine grin splashed her face. “You’ve got quite a mouth on you, Night Fire. I think when I’m done with the others, I’ll take you back with me. I’ll fuck you unconscious and then I’ll have Madcap transform your sex organ into something made of an alloy. Then I’ll break it off and use it to pleasure myself. How does that sound?”

  “Everything except for the unconscious sex stuff sounds pretty messed up,” I replied.

  She grinned. “You are such a cute little maggot.”

  It took me a moment to process those words.

  Cute, had she just called me…cute?

  It wasn’t the explosions or the fact that she’d tried to kill me that got my blood boiling. Oh no, it was the word that I hated to hear. Cute was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I saw red and put my head down and charged at her as she flicked a finger and detonated a patch of ground under my feet. The contained blast flung me back on my ass.

  “Be a dear, stay down, and rest that pretty little mouth of yours, maggot,” Big Dread said. “You’re going to need it when I come for you.”

  “Leave him alone!” Aurora shouted.
“This is between you and me!”

  Big Dread smiled. “One person wants what another person has, Aurora. That is the history of the universe distilled to less than ten words.”

  “Leave us alone and maybe we’ll let you live,” Aurora said.

  Big Dread barked a nasty laugh, and pointed at the trap bottle which Aurora held tight to her chest. “Before I cross you over, I do want to offer my thanks. You’re owed a debt of gratitude. You have saved us much time and effort. You’ve done the dirty work for us.”

  Aurora was silent.

  “Give me the godsdamned Light Breaker,” Big Dread said.

  “Come and take it,” Aurora replied.

  Big Dread began moving toward us, and Aurora looked to me. “Give me your hand!”

  ‘Are you nuts?!” I responded. “Didn’t you hear what she said! She’s gonna cut my dong off and use it for a dildo!”

  “Give me your hand now, you fool!” Aurora yelled. “Together we can’t be stopped.”

  Big Dread threw up her arms as I lurched over and grabbed Aurora’s hand and a warm current seemed to wrap my hand around hers. A cocoon of white light enveloped us, and then wisps of blue light shot out the ends of our fingers, spasming into the shape of a corkscrew.

  We brought the corkscrew back and heaved it at Big Dread, where it slammed into her chest.

  There was a flash of light, and my POV whited out.

  Blinking away stars, I used my arm to cover my eyes, and when I blinked and looked back, I saw Big Dread propelled back through the air by the blast.

  She hit the wall of flames, tore a hole through it, and kept on going.

  “RUN!” Aurora screamed.

  We stampeded forward, hurtling through the hole in the wall to see Big Dread crashing to the ground a few hundred feet away from where the wave sleds were hidden.

  Beyond her a column of dust was rising up in the distance.

  Shit!

  The Morningstars were on the way!

  Balls of light propelled by smoke trails soon filled the sky, curling over our heads. They were being fired by the villains and began dropping to the ground all around us like mortar shells, spraying debris into the air. In seconds it was like being trapped in a sandstorm, there was so much grit flying through the air.

  Through the haze, I saw forms running and hover-charging toward us. I made out Madcap, The Showstopper, Dolly Dagger, and dozens of general-purpose Fodder grunts. I didn’t see the Barrister, but I had little doubt he there somewhere, coming with the others to Big Dread’s aid.

  The bad guys moved with superhuman precision, and before we could scramble aboard the still-concealed wave sleds, they were on us.

  Kaptain Khaos tapped his tattoos, amping the volume on his embedded speakers. “We need some fightin’ music!” he thundered.

  An old rap song echoed, a tune by a guy named DMX who started shouting about losing his mind, up in here, up in here.

  Everybody bobbed their heads to the song, cracking their knuckles, ready to give and receive.

  The Showstopper loomed fifteen yards out in front of us, leading the advance of the Morningstars.

  He conjured up a cyclone and powered it toward Atlas, who was one step quicker.

  The big man planted his feet and dropped The Showstopper with a fist to the face.

  The impact drove The Showstopper back through the air, and then Atlas was leading us on the attack. I saw him slam a fist into the gut of one of the Fodder, then spin and slam an elbow into another before jump-kicking a third.

  While he was doing this, I was leaping through the dust, coming up behind Lyric, who was bombarding the bad guys with sonic bullets.

  I saw Dolly Dagger release a storm of fireballs that she heaved at Lyric. I engineered several plasma balls and tossed them at her incendiaries, shattering the fire mid-air, turning the fireballs into a plume of harmless friction sparks.

  Lyric held up a fist to thank me, and I wheeled around, realizing I’d gotten used to fighting with the other superheroes. Just like a pro sports star, the game had slowed down for me.

  I ran forward, lowering a shoulder, upending a Fodder before I spotted Madcap. There was a mad grin etched on his face.

  He called me out, his lips pulled back in a sneer of pure malice. The kind of sneer that’s sported by every bully, every person who enjoys putting a boot down on the neck of another.

  Madcap stabbed a finger in my direction and cursed me.

  I flipped him both middle fingers and the villain rampaged forward, twirling a finger before releasing a cord of black light that I knew contained whatever dark energy allowed him to turn one material into another.

  Madcap wielded the energy like a bullwhip, bringing it back over his head before snapping it forward at me.

  I collected a ball of plasma and Madcap’s bullwhip struck against it and bounced off.

  The dark energy ricocheted back into a pair of unlucky Fodder who were instantly turned into steel statues.

  I threw another plasma ball sideways at Madcap, hitting him in the leg, knocking him to the ground.

  I was readying myself to finish him when there was a glint of light peripherally, and I reflexively ducked as—

  A metal object slashed through the air, nearly decapitating me.

  Somehow, I managed to do the splits and looked up to see the Barrister’s gavel.

  As if pulled on an invisible string, the gavel rocketed back through the dust into the hand of the man himself.

  The Barrister had an unreadable expression, then fixed a nasty gaze on me. Before I could react, he threw the gavel at me again and—

  BOOM!

  Something slammed into it before it could reach me.

  It was a ball of plasma fired by Aurora.

  She ran through the haze, still holding the trap bottle, executing a perfect crouch-slide, ending up next to me. She grabbed my wrist. “YOU HAVE TO COME WITH ME!”

  I stood and pivoted to see one of the wave sleds.

  Aurora clambered aboard and pulled me onto the machine, which pitched to the left and then rose up into the sky.

  “Where are the others?!” I shouted.

  She pointed and I looked down to see Atlas, and the others boarding the other wave sled.

  “We’re going to safeguard the bottle and draw the Barrister off!” Aurora shouted.

  41

  I spotted the supervillain on the ground below us.

  He’d collected his gavel and was running across the Empty Quarter with long, loping skips, chasing us.

  “How did she get through?” I asked Aurora. “I saw the wall close up behind us.”

  Her eyes fell on me. “I’m in the middle of trying not to get us killed, and you’re asking more questions?”

  “I mean, how could Big Dread get through the fire wall? She would’ve needed blood from an Elemental, right? From…Greylock.”

  “You know what the problem is with asking too many questions, Quincy? Sometimes you get answers.”

  I opened my mouth to reply and my words were drowned out by a huge, echoing—

  BOOM!

  The wave sled rocked.

  A jet of black smoke billowed from the underside of the craft as I flew sideways. Aurora snagged me before I pitched over the edge.

  We descended rapidly to the ground, the machine kicking up a whirlwind of gray dust from the regolith.

  Righting myself, I caught sight of the Barrister’s gavel flying back into the hands of the villain, who leaped up onto a slab of naked rock and kept on coming.

  He caught some serious air and flew toward us as I gathered up a ball of plasma and fired it at him—

  The plasma roared into his midsection and burst apart in a flash that blinded us for a moment.

  When we looked back, the Barrister was nowhere in sight.

  “Do you see him?” Aurora asked.

  I shook my head. “I think we’re in the clear,” I replied.

  “What makes you think that?”

&
nbsp; “I’ve got a sixth sense about these things,” I answered, tapping a finger to my head. “We are gonna be platinum.”

  A rocky outcropping, down and to our right, vanished in a blast that fragmented the rock, sending shards of it in every direction.

  I saw the flash of light off the gavel as it plowed through the rock then circled around and snapped back into the mallet-sized hand of the Barrister. The big villain mounted another hillock of gravel and grabbed his sex while making an obscene gesture at us.

  “Did he just do what I think he did?” I asked.

  Aurora didn’t answer, she was too busy firing up the wave sled that vroomed forward, throttling the acoustic vortices that propelled us eight feet off the ground.

  Aurora stomped on the accelerator, increasing the intensity of the ultrasonic waves that rocketed us forward. My head snapped back as Aurora deftly maneuvered the sled up and over the outcroppings and a monstrous knot of bleached bones.

  The stone formations all around us vanished in percussive blasts, obliterated by the Barrister’s gavel. Looking over the rear seat, I saw the bastard ducking under a stone arch and hurdling a ribbon of boulders, arms and legs chopping the air.

  “That sonofabitch is incredibly persistent!” I shouted. “And he’s got serious anger issues!”

  “Do your thing!” Aurora screamed back.

  “You want me to bust some moves?!”

  She smiled as if she didn’t have a care in the world. “No, Quincy, I want you to use your powers to defeat him!”

  I sucked in a breath and heaved myself up just at the moment the Barrister flung his gavel directly at us.

  The gavel spun forward as time and sound seemed to slow.

  Sounds muted, but the colors all around me suddenly became brighter. The air shimmered with iridescent color and then assumed a glassy, almost liquid-like quality. My line of sight was fringed with chromatic aberrations, and then I held up my arms as the air caught fire and—

  BAROOM!

  I expelled a field of blue flame that was met by the gavel.

  The blue flame exploded, blocking the gavel.

  The backblast shunted me sideways.

  I screamed, falling over the edge of the wave sled as Aurora grabbed my arm.