Friar Tuck

by Robert Alexander Wason

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  THE LITTLE TOWN OF BOSCO

  I hadn't done much eatin' or sleepin' on that trip, an' I was plumbbeat out; so after I fell asleep, the Friar put a soogan over me andleft me by the fire. He awakened me next mornin', gettin' breakfast,and it didn't take him very long to talk me into joinin' on to him forcompany. I had been avoidin' humans, for fear I might be tempted tostart trouble and find the easy way out of it all; but his plan wasjust the opposite--to dive so deep into humanity that I could catch aglimpse o' the scheme o' things.

  The Friar held that we all had crosses comin' to us any way. If wepicked 'em up an' put 'em on our own shoulders, we'd still be free,an' the totin' of our crosses would make us stronger; while if wetried to run away, we'd be roped an' thrown, an' the crosses chainedon us. I'd a heap sooner be free than a slave; so I decided to carrymine, head up, an' get right with myself as soon as possible.

  The Friar didn't work off any solemn stuff on me, nor he didn't try tobe funny; he just turned himself into a sun-glass, an' focused enoughsunshine on to me to warm me up without any risk of blisterin'. I gotto know him even better those days than I had before. His hair wasgettin' a bit frosty at the temples; but aside from this, he hadn'taged none since the first day I had seen him. He was like some bigtree growin' all by itself. Every year it seems a little ruggeder,every year it seems to offer a little roomier shade; but the wind andthe rain and the hot sun don't seem to make it grow old. They onlyseem to make it take a deeper root, and throw out a wider spread o'boughs.

  He told me o' some o' the scraps between the cattle men an' the sheepmen--the Diamond Dot was out o' the way of sheep at that time. Then Ibegan to take a little more interest in things, an' after takin' notefor a day or so, I prophesied a dry summer; and this brought us aroundto Olaf.

  The Friar warmed up at mention of him. He said 'at he had never seen amatch turn out better 'n Olaf's. He said Kit had just what Olaflacked, an' Olaf had just what Kit lacked, an' their boy was justabout the finest kid he knew of anywhere. We decided to head up theirway an' pay a visit.

  As we rode along we took notice of the way things were changin'. Wepassed several sheep wagons, five or six irrigation ditches, an' hereand there, we found men who put more faith in alfalfa 'n they did instock. The Friar had been well to the north when I happened upon him,and we traveled a sight o' country before we reached our destination.Everywhere folks knew him, an' he knew them; and when I saw theirfaces light up at sight of him, I had to admit that he had done theright thing in stickin'.

  Mostly he sang the "Art thou weary," one for his marchin' song, now;and it got into my blood and did a lot to healthen me up again. Ican't rightly say 'at I ever got religion; but more 'n once religionhas got me an' lifted me up like the Crazy Water in flood, bearin' meon over rocks an' through whirlpools, an' showin' me what a weak,useless thing I was at the best. The's somethin' inside me 'at allusresponded to the Friar's music, an' made me willin' to sweep on overthe edge o' the world with him; but when he tried to reason outreligion to me, I have to own up 'at the' was a lot of it I couldn'tsee into.

  We passed Skelty's old place on our way in, an' found a red-eyed,black-headed man runnin' it. His name was Maxwell, but they stillcalled the place Skelty's. We went in an' had dinner, an' found fiveor six Cross-branders there. They were doin' plenty o' drinkin' an'crackin' idiotic jokes with the girls; but they nodded friendly enoughto us, an' we nodded back.

  As soon as we finished, the Friar went outside for his smoke; but Ileaned back right where I was for mine. One o' the Cross-branders, atall, gaunt, squinty cuss by the name o' Dixon, was sittin' near me,and presently he turned an' sez: "You're Happy Hawkins, ain't ya?"

  "That's me," sez I.

  "Well, on the level," sez he, "what became o' Badger-face?"

  "I've often wondered about that myself," sez I.

  "We supposed he got killed," sez he; "but two fellers claimed they sawhim goin' south in the spring with your huntin' party."

  "What made ya think he got killed?" sez I.

  "'Cause he started over here one night, and never showed up again,"sez he.

  "I don't know what become of him," sez I. "Dinky Bradford said he wasgoin' to take him to Africa; but whether he did or not I can't say. Inever felt no call to pry into Dinky's business. Looks to me as thoughwe were goin' to have an extra dry summer."

  "I say so too," sez Dixon. "Who was this Dinky Bradford?"

  "That's bothered me a heap," sez I. "He claimed to be a Greek hero,though what sort o' business that is, I can't say. Finished yourround-up yet?"

  "Just got through. Where is this Greek hero these days?" sez he.

  "Can't prove it by me," sez I. "He's one o' these fellers no one seemsto know anything about. I saw him go without eatin' for four daysonce, an' he came out of it in better shape 'n he went in. Badger-facewas your foreman, wasn't he?"

  "Yes," sez he. "Ol' Pepper Kendal is foreman now."

  "I should think a foreman would have some load on his shoulders withthe boss gone all winter," sez I.

  "The boss brought a woman back with him this time," sez Dixon.

  "What!" sez I. "You don't mean ta tell me 'at Ty Jones has got him awoman after all these years?"

  "That's what," sez Dixon. "Somethin' queer about her, too. Ty has hada new shack built for her up back o' the old house. They don't seemoverly friendly for a bride an' groom."

  "Ain't nothin' overly friendly with Ty, is the'?" sez I.

  "Oh, I dunno," sez he. "Ty ain't as sticky as taffy, but he's a mightygood man to work for."

  "What sort of a woman did he get?" sez I.

  "She don't show herself much," sez he. "She's tall an' shapely, an'right smart younger 'n Ty; but she spends most of her time in the newshack; and from all we can tell, she's froze up tighter 'n Ty is."

  "Well, I guess we'll have to jog on. Good luck," sez I, and me an' theFriar rode on. He was as much beat out over Ty Jones gettin' a womanas I was; but first thing he thought of was, 'at this might have asoftenin' effect on Ty, an' give him an openin'.

  We reached Olaf's in time for supper, and found Kit bustlin' about ashappy as a little brown hen. The Friar hadn't sprung it none about thekid. He was a solid little chunk with a couple o' dimples and all thesigns o' health. I looked careful into his eyes. They were full o'devilment, an' he scowled his brows down over 'em when I held him; butthey were brown like Kit's.

  "Oh, he's too dirty to touch," sez Kit, beamin' all over with pride."I just can't keep him clean, try as I will."

  "Be careful, Happy, and don't soil your hands on that baby!" yells theFriar as though in a panic. "Let me have him. I was dirty once,myself."

  It was plain to see 'at the kid an' the Friar were old cronies; and itwas a pleasant sight to see 'em together. The Friar got down on thefloor with him an' played bear an' horse an' the kid entered into itan' fair howled with merriment. Kit scolded 'em both an' took so muchinterest in their antics she hardly knew what she was doin' to thesupper things.

  Before long Olaf came in. He still took up all the space not otherwiseoccupied; but he had an altogether-satisfied expression which made yaforget how everlastin' ugly he really was. He took us out an' showedus the garden, an' the new wire fencin' an' the baby's swing, an' allthe rest of his treasures. Olaf didn't want any more changes to takeplace in the world. If his vote could have made it, things would justcontinue as they were until the earth wore out. It made me feel alittle lonely for a moment; but I entered in as hearty as I could.

  Durin' supper I sez to Kit: "Well, Ty Jones has a woman, now; and ifit improves him as much as it has Olaf, he may blossom out into a goodneighbor to you yet."

  "Ty Jones got a woman!" exclaimed Kit. "Well, I'd just like to lay myeyes on the woman 'at would take Ty Jones."

  "Oh, all women ain't so set on havin' a handsome man as you were," sezI.

  "Well, I wouldn't have any other kind," sez Kit, an' she gave her heada toss while Olaf grinned like a full moon.

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p; They were both purty well beat out to think o' Ty Jones havin' awoman, an' we all talked it over durin' the rest o' the meal. Aftersupper, Olaf took the kid on his lap and sat by the fire tellin' ushis plans, while Kit cleared up the dishes an' stuck in a word of herown now and again. It was plain to see 'at she did full as much o' theplannin' as he did, an' this was probably what made her so satisfied.The kid regarded Olaf's mustache as some sort of an exercisin'machine, an' Olaf had to fight him all the time he was talkin', but hecertainly did set a heap o' store by that boy.

  He told us he had about sixty cows and a fair run o' two an' threeyear olds with a high average of calves; but that he intended to sellthe whole run to the Double V outfit up on the Rawhide, and get asmall band of sheep. This flattened me out complete; but he had a lotof arguments on his side. He was also experimentin' with grain seedwhich he had got from Canada, an' he already had a patch of alfalfawhich was doin' fine. He was one o' those fellers who can't tire'emselves out, an' so just keep on workin' as long as the law allows'em to use daylight. He had a young Swede workin' for him, but just atthat time, he was off lookin' for the work hosses which had voted'emselves a vacation, an' had gone up into the hills.

  The Friar wanted to go up into the Basin country next day, so webedded down purty early. I lay awake a long time thinkin' over what afright Olaf had once been, and how he had straightened out of it.

  Next mornin' we started soon after sun-up. The Friar had a couple o'women runnin' a Sunday School at Bosco, and he wanted to see how theywere gettin' along. They had belonged to his brand of church clearback in England, and he set a lot of store by 'em; but owned up thatthey had their work cut out for 'em at Bosco; it bein' one o' the mostungodly little towns in the whole country.

  We nooned on Carter, slipped over Boulder Creek Pass, and reachedBosco at sun-down. It allus surprised me to see how much travel theFriar could chalk up, takin' his weight into account; but he was lessirritatin' to a hoss 'n airy other man I ever met up with. The more ofa hurry he was in, the more time he took on the bad hills; and henever robbed a hoss by sleepin' an hour late in the mornin', an'makin' the hoss even up by travelin' beyond his gait.

  The husband of one o' these women ran a saloon, the husband of theother--the women were sisters--was the undertaker and also ran a meatmarket. I thought this about the queerest business arrangement I hadever been confronted against; but the man himself was full as peculiaras his business.

  I have a game I have played with myself all my life. I call it "why,"an' I suppose it has furnished me more fun 'n anything else has. Itake any proposition I come across an' say all the whys about it I canthink up an' then try to answer 'em. Why did anything ever happen justas it did happen just when it did happen? This is the joke o' life tome. I have played it on myself times without end; but only once in awhile even with myself can I follow the line back to common sense.