by Leo Tolstoy
to drink tea in a wood and on the grass and where none else had ever
drunk tea before seemed to us a treat beyond expressing.
When Turka arrived at the little clearing where the carriage was
halted he took Papa's detailed instructions as to how we were to divide
ourselves and where each of us was to go (though, as a matter of fact,
he never acted according to such instructions, but always followed his
own devices). Then he unleashed the hounds, fastened the leashes to
his saddle, whistled to the pack, and disappeared among the young birch
trees the liberated hounds jumping about him in high delight, wagging
their tails, and sniffing and gambolling with one another as they
dispersed themselves in different directions.
"Has anyone a pocket-handkerchief to spare?" asked Papa. I took mine
from my pocket and offered it to him.
"Very well. Fasten it to this greyhound here."
"Gizana?" I asked, with the air of a connoisseur.
"Yes. Then run him along the road with you. When you come to a little
clearing in the wood stop and look about you, and don't come back to me
without a hare."
Accordingly I tied my handkerchief round Gizana's soft neck, and set off
running at full speed towards the appointed spot, Papa laughing as he
shouted after me, "Hurry up, hurry up or you'll be late!"
Every now and then Gizana kept stopping, pricking up his ears, and
listening to the hallooing of the beaters. Whenever he did this I was
not strong enough to move him, and could do no more than shout, "Come
on, come on!" Presently he set off so fast that I could not restrain
him, and I encountered more than one fall before we reached our
destination. Selecting there a level, shady spot near the roots of a
great oak-tree, I lay down on the turf, made Gizana crouch beside me,
and waited. As usual, my imagination far outstripped reality. I fancied
that I was pursuing at least my third hare when, as a matter of fact,
the first hound was only just giving tongue. Presently, however, Turka's
voice began to sound through the wood in louder and more excited tones,
the baying of a hound came nearer and nearer, and then another, and then
a third, and then a fourth, deep throat joined in the rising and falling
cadences of a chorus, until the whole had united their voices in one
continuous, tumultuous burst of melody. As the Russian proverb expresses
it, "The forest had found a tongue, and the hounds were burning as with
fire."
My excitement was so great that I nearly swooned where I stood. My lips
parted themselves as though smiling, the perspiration poured from me in
streams, and, in spite of the tickling sensation caused by the drops as
they trickled over my chin, I never thought of wiping them away. I felt
that a crisis was approaching. Yet the tension was too unnatural to
last. Soon the hounds came tearing along the edge of the wood, and
then--behold, they were racing away from me again, and of hares there
was not a sign to be seen! I looked in every direction and Gizana did
the same--pulling at his leash at first and whining. Then he lay down
again by my side, rested his muzzle on my knees, and resigned himself to
disappointment. Among the naked roots of the oak-tree under which I was
sitting. I could see countless ants swarming over the parched grey earth
and winding among the acorns, withered oak-leaves, dry twigs, russet
moss, and slender, scanty blades of grass. In serried files they kept
pressing forward on the level track they had made for themselves--some
carrying burdens, some not. I took a piece of twig and barred their way.
Instantly it was curious to see how they made light of the obstacle.
Some got past it by creeping underneath, and some by climbing over it. A
few, however, there were (especially those weighted with loads) who were
nonplussed what to do. They either halted and searched for a way round,
or returned whence they had come, or climbed the adjacent herbage, with
the evident intention of reaching my hand and going up the sleeve of my
jacket. From this interesting spectacle my attention was distracted by
the yellow wings of a butterfly which was fluttering alluringly before
me. Yet I had scarcely noticed it before it flew away to a little
distance and, circling over some half-faded blossoms of white clover,
settled on one of them. Whether it was the sun's warmth that delighted
it, or whether it was busy sucking nectar from the flower, at all events
it seemed thoroughly comfortable. It scarcely moved its wings at all,
and pressed itself down into the clover until I could hardly see
its body. I sat with my chin on my hands and watched it with intense
interest.
Suddenly Gizana sprang up and gave me such a violent jerk that I nearly
rolled over. I looked round. At the edge of the wood a hare had just
come into view, with one ear bent down and the other one sharply
pricked. The blood rushed to my head, and I forgot everything else as
I shouted, slipped the dog, and rushed towards the spot. Yet all was in
vain. The hare stopped, made a rush, and was lost to view.
How confused I felt when at that moment Turka stepped from the
undergrowth (he had been following the hounds as they ran along the
edges of the wood)! He had seen my mistake (which had consisted in my
not biding my time), and now threw me a contemptuous look as he said,
"Ah, master!" And you should have heard the tone in which he said it! It
would have been a relief to me if he had then and there suspended me to
his saddle instead of the hare. For a while I could only stand miserably
where I was, without attempting to recall the dog, and ejaculate as I
slapped my knees, "Good heavens! What a fool I was!" I could hear the
hounds retreating into the distance, and baying along the further side
of the wood as they pursued the hare, while Turka rallied them with
blasts on his gorgeous horn: yet I did not stir.
VIII -- WE PLAY GAMES
THE hunt was over, a cloth had been spread in the shade of some young
birch-trees, and the whole party was disposed around it. The butler,
Gabriel, had stamped down the surrounding grass, wiped the plates in
readiness, and unpacked from a basket a quantity of plums and peaches
wrapped in leaves.
Through the green branches of the young birch-trees the sun glittered
and threw little glancing balls of light upon the pattern of my napkin,
my legs, and the bald moist head of Gabriel. A soft breeze played in
the leaves of the trees above us, and, breathing softly upon my hair and
heated face, refreshed me beyond measure. When we had finished the
fruit and ices, nothing remained to be done around the empty cloth, so,
despite the oblique, scorching rays of the sun, we rose and proceeded to
play.
"Well, what shall it be?" said Lubotshka, blinking in the sunlight and
skipping about the grass, "Suppose we play Robinson?"
"No, that's a tiresome game," objected Woloda, stretching himself lazily
on the turf and gnawing some leaves, "Always Robinson! If you want to
play at something, play at b
uilding a summerhouse."
Woloda was giving himself tremendous airs. Probably he was proud of
having ridden the hunter, and so pretended to be very tired. Perhaps,
also, he had too much hard-headedness and too little imagination
fully to enjoy the game of Robinson. It was a game which consisted of
performing various scenes from The Swiss Family Robinson, a book which
we had recently been reading.
"Well, but be a good boy. Why not try and please us this time?" the
girls answered. "You may be Charles or Ernest or the father, whichever
you like best," added Katenka as she tried to raise him from the ground
by pulling at his sleeve.
"No, I'm not going to; it's a tiresome game," said Woloda again, though
smiling as if secretly pleased.
"It would be better to sit at home than not to play at ANYTHING,"
murmured Lubotshka, with tears in her eyes. She was a great weeper.
"Well, go on, then. Only, DON'T cry; I can't stand that sort of thing."
Woloda's condescension did not please us much. On the contrary, his
lazy, tired expression took away all the fun of the game. When we sat
on the ground and imagined that we were sitting in a boat and either
fishing or rowing with all our might, Woloda persisted in sitting with
folded hands or in anything but a fisherman's posture. I made a remark
about it, but he replied that, whether we moved our hands or not, we
should neither gain nor lose ground--certainly not advance at all, and I
was forced to agree with him. Again, when I pretended to go out hunting,
and, with a stick over my shoulder, set off into the wood, Woloda only
lay down on his back with his hands under his head, and said that he
supposed it was all the same whether he went or not. Such behaviour and
speeches cooled our ardour for the game and were very disagreeable--the
more so since it was impossible not to confess to oneself that Woloda
was right, I myself knew that it was not only impossible to kill birds
with a stick, but to shoot at all with such a weapon. Still, it was
the game, and if we were once to begin reasoning thus, it would become
equally impossible for us to go for drives on chairs. I think that even
Woloda himself cannot at that moment have forgotten how, in the long
winter evenings, we had been used to cover an arm-chair with a shawl
and make a carriage of it--one of us being the coachman, another one the
footman, the two girls the passengers, and three other chairs the trio
of horses abreast. With what ceremony we used to set out, and with what
adventures we used to meet on the way! How gaily and quickly those long
winter evenings used to pass! If we were always to judge from reality,
games would be nonsense; but if games were nonsense, what else would
there be left to do?
IX -- A FIRST ESSAY IN LOVE
PRETENDING to gather some "American fruit" from a tree, Lubotshka
suddenly plucked a leaf upon which was a huge caterpillar, and throwing
the insect with horror to the ground, lifted her hands and sprang away
as though afraid it would spit at her. The game stopped, and we crowded
our heads together as we stooped to look at the curiosity.
I peeped over Katenka's shoulder as she was trying to lift the
caterpillar by placing another leaf in its way. I had observed before
that the girls had a way of shrugging their shoulders whenever they were
trying to put a loose garment straight on their bare necks, as well as
that Mimi always grew angry on witnessing this manoeuvre and declared
it to be a chambermaid's trick. As Katenka bent over the caterpillar she
made that very movement, while at the same instant the breeze lifted the
fichu on her white neck. Her shoulder was close to my lips, I looked at
it and kissed it. She did not turn round, but Woloda remarked without
raising his head, "What spooniness!" I felt the tears rising to my eyes,
and could not take my gaze from Katenka. I had long been used to her
fair, fresh face, and had always been fond of her, but now I looked at
her more closely, and felt more fond of her, than I had ever done or
felt before.
When we returned to the grown-ups, Papa informed us, to our great joy,
that, at Mamma's entreaties, our departure was to be postponed until
the following morning. We rode home beside the carriage--Woloda and
I galloping near it, and vieing with one another in our exhibition of
horsemanship and daring. My shadow looked longer now than it had done
before, and from that I judged that I had grown into a fine rider. Yet
my complacency was soon marred by an unfortunate occurrence. Desiring
to outdo Woloda before the audience in the carriage, I dropped a little
behind. Then with whip and spur I urged my steed forward, and at the
same time assumed a natural, graceful attitude, with the intention of
whooting past the carriage on the side on which Katenka was seated. My
only doubt was whether to halloo or not as I did so. In the event, my
infernal horse stopped so abruptly when just level with the carriage
horses that I was pitched forward on to its neck and cut a very sorry
figure!
X -- THE SORT OF MAN MY FATHER WAS
Papa was a gentleman of the last century, with all the chivalrous
character, self-reliance, and gallantry of the youth of that time. Upon
the men of the present day he looked with a contempt arising partly from
inborn pride and partly from a secret feeling of vexation that, in this
age of ours, he could no longer enjoy the influence and success which
had been his in his youth. His two principal failings were gambling and
gallantry, and he had won or lost, in the course of his career, several
millions of roubles.
Tall and of imposing figure, he walked with a curiously quick, mincing
gait, as well as had a habit of hitching one of his shoulders. His eyes
were small and perpetually twinkling, his nose large and aquiline, his
lips irregular and rather oddly (though pleasantly) compressed, his
articulation slightly defective and lisping, and his head quite bald.
Such was my father's exterior from the days of my earliest recollection.
It was an exterior which not only brought him success and made him a
man a bonnes fortunes but one which pleased people of all ranks and
stations. Especially did it please those whom he desired to please.
At all junctures he knew how to take the lead, for, though not deriving
from the highest circles of society, he had always mixed with them, and
knew how to win their respect. He possessed in the highest degree that
measure of pride and self-confidence which, without giving offence,
maintains a man in the opinion of the world. He had much originality,
as well as the ability to use it in such a way that it benefited him as
much as actual worldly position or fortune could have done. Nothing in
the universe could surprise him, and though not of eminent attainments
in life, he seemed born to have acquired them. He understood so
perfectly how to make both himself and others forget and keep at
a distance the seamy side of life, with all its petty troubles
and vicissitudes, that it
was impossible not to envy him. He was a
connoisseur in everything which could give ease and pleasure, as well
as knew how to make use of such knowledge. Likewise he prided himself on
the brilliant connections which he had formed through my mother's family
or through friends of his youth, and was secretly jealous of any one of
a higher rank than himself--any one, that is to say, of a rank higher
than a retired lieutenant of the Guards. Moreover, like all ex-officers,
he refused to dress himself in the prevailing fashion, though he attired
himself both originally and artistically--his invariable wear being
light, loose-fitting suits, very fine shirts, and large collars and
cuffs. Everything seemed to suit his upright figure and quiet, assured
air. He was sensitive to the pitch of sentimentality, and, when reading
a pathetic passage, his voice would begin to tremble and the tears to
come into his eyes, until he had to lay the book aside. Likewise he was
fond of music, and could accompany himself on the piano as he sang the
love songs of his friend A-- or gipsy songs or themes from operas;
but he had no love for serious music, and would frankly flout received
opinion by declaring that, whereas Beethoven's sonatas wearied him and
sent him to sleep, his ideal of beauty was "Do not wake me, youth"
as Semenoff sang it, or "Not one" as the gipsy Taninsha rendered that
ditty. His nature was essentially one of those which follow public
opinion concerning what is good, and consider only that good which the
public declares to be so. [It may be noted that the author has said
earlier in the chapter that his father possessed "much originality."]
God only knows whether he had any moral convictions. His life was so
full of amusement that probably he never had time to form any, and was
too successful ever to feel the lack of them.
As he grew to old age he looked at things always from a fixed point