Full House

by Janet Evanovich

  "Yes, Daddy." She was sure of that. In fact, it was the only thing she was certain of at the moment. Everything else felt weird and unreal, as though she were walking through a fog and trying desperately to see through it. So many questions, so few answers.

  Billie's father nodded his approval. "That's all I need to hear. Like I told your mother, sometimes love hits you fast and hard, and sometimes it just eases along like a lazy river when you least expect it."

  "Wow, that's deep," Deedee said.

  "Oh, now, look what you've gone and done," her mother said. "I've got tears in my eyes." She grabbed her husband's hand. "Let's go before I start bawling." She smiled tremulously at Billie. "We'll see you downstairs, honey."

  Billie tried to remain calm as the wedding party moved to the solarium. It had been agreed that Christie would serve as maid of honor for both brides, and that Billie would follow Deedee to the outdoor altar.

  Billie tried to organize her thoughts as the first chords of the wedding march reached her ears. In her own mind she had already accepted the vows, but this was the day when her parents and her children would accept her as Mrs. Kaharchek.

  All at once, there was a commotion. A lovely blonde broke through the small crowd waiting to go in and stood before Billie. Her denim shorts bordered on indecent, and two pert nipples stood at attention, barely veiled by her thin tank top.

  "Ohmigod!" Deedee said.

  "Remember me?"

  Billie blinked. "Gloria?"

  "Yes. Not only was I fired over the fiasco you caused here the other night at the bachelor party, but you didn't return my G-string and tassels as you promised. Do you have any idea what they cost?"

  "Who is this woman?" Frankie's father demanded. "And what's this nonsense about a G-string?"

  "What's a G-string?" Christie asked.

  "You're too young to know," her grandfather said sharply, still eyeing Billie, obviously waiting for an explanation.

  "It's a long story, Daddy." Billie looked at Gloria. "I'm sort of in the middle of something right now, and I don't have my purse on me. Would it be okay if I paid you for them later?"

  The music changed.

  "Mom!" Christie hissed. "We're supposed to go out now."

  "I'm not leaving till I get my money," Gloria said. "One hundred bucks."

  "One hundred dollars!" Deedee cried. "That's highway robbery."

  Gloria shrugged. "Take it or leave it."

  "Mom, they're waiting!" Christie said. "Everybody is staring at us."

  "Get lost," Deedee told the woman.

  Gloria stuck her tongue out at her. "Okay, fifty bucks, and I'm outta here."

  "Oh, for Pete's sake," Billie's father said, reaching into his back pocket. He pulled out his wallet and handed the girl several bills. "Now, leave before you ruin my daughter's wedding."

  "Gladly." Gloria looked at Billie, and her expression softened. "To tell you the truth, I was going to quit that dumb job anyway." She started to turn away, then thought of something, and turned back. "Oh, and congratulations on your marriage."

  Billie saw the organist craning her head as though wondering what was holding them up. The minister stood there, looking as bewildered as the guests. The organist began replaying the wedding march and Billie waited for her cue.

  "Okay, Christie, I believe we're ready," she said, trying to sound calm when her insides were jumping about like popcorn on a hot skillet. It was then that she noticed her daughter's forehead, but it was too late to do anything about it. She sighed and watched Christie walk forward, and then Deedee, on the arm of Frankie's manager, Bucky. Billie caught a glimpse of Nick waiting for her at the altar. He looked handsome, and only slightly concerned as to why the wedding party had taken so long to get started. A small private smile lit his face when their eyes met.

  Nick watched Billie walk the length of the improvised aisle on the arm of her father. She was beautiful in a cream-colored suit that was as simple and unpretentious as she was.

  She looked worried.

  Nick took his place beside her and wondered if she was just nervous. He glanced around quickly and almost groaned aloud at the sight of Snakeman with his boa. He looked at Christie, saw three wrestlers' signatures on her forehead, and winced. He considered himself to be flexible, but, he had to admit, this wedding was somewhat unusual. And what the hell was that clacking sound? One look at Deedee and he had his answer. He'd never seen so many beads on a woman. What could she have been thinking when she'd purchased such an outfit?

  Poor Billie. He'd wanted everything to be so perfect for her.

  The minister's smile looked forced as he began a short speech about the bonds of marriage. Billie could barely hear him over the jangling beads. "Could you speak up?" she whispered.

  The minister shot her a look of apology, then glared at Deedee. He cleared his throat and started over in a louder voice.

  Nick glanced at Christie, who looked as though she wanted to crawl under a rock. The door to the solarium slammed and almost everybody present glanced over their shoulders to see Max running down the aisle, his hair uncombed as usual, his glasses askew. He pulled up at Nick's elbow and tried to straighten his tie.

  "Sorry I'm late," he said.

  The minister arched one brow in question.

  "I'm the best man," Max said.

  Billie thought the boy looked tired and pale, but she couldn't question him at the moment.

  The minister began again. "As I was saying—"

  Just then there was an explosion, followed by the sound of shattering glass. Several women screamed; the crowd bolted to their feet, craning their heads to see what had caused the blast. Billie glanced in the direction of the largest tent where tables had been set up for the reception that was to follow. The elaborate wedding cake had been blown to smithereens, the food splattered on shards of what had once been champagne glasses. The champagne bottles had burst, spewing champagne in all directions.

  A sense of dread and disbelief clouded her head. She stood motionless as reality set in.

  "Everyone clear the area now!" a detective yelled, even as the guests scattered toward the long driveway that led to the road.

  Billie grabbed Joel and Christie and led them away quickly, depositing them with her parents in case her help was needed. An employee from the catering service had obviously been injured in the blast; several security guards and plainclothes detectives were kneeling beside someone on the ground.

  Billie searched out Nick. He and Max were helping an elderly couple to safety. They joined her a moment later.

  "Thank God you're okay," Nick said, his eyes combing Billie for signs of injury. "Where are the kids?"

  "My parents have them."

  "Is everyone all right?" Nick called out to the stunned crowd. They looked about and finally nodded.

  "I need to talk to you, Nick," Max said, sounding desperate.

  Nick turned to him, the look on his face almost menacing. "Are you responsible for this?" he demanded.

  Max's expression changed from concern to anger. "Hell, no. And I'm tired of you accusing me for everything."

  Nick met his gaze. The boy seemed as frightened as everyone else. "Then help me check the guests. I want to make sure nobody was hit by flying glass."

  The boy spun on his heels and headed in the opposite direction. "Go to hell."

  Nick glared at Max's retreating back, but he didn't have time to do anything about the kid just yet. He had to check for injuries.

  Billie noted the wedding guests standing around quietly, most of them still in shock. Many were her family members—simple, down-to-earth people who'd never been in a house the size of Nick's or rubbed elbows with famous people, and had certainly never had to run from a bomb blast. They looked toward Billie and Nick, obviously searching for answers.

  All at once, Billie spied Sheridan Flock heading toward them. The woman looked angry enough to take off Nick's head. She planted her hands on her hips. "Oh, gee, I hope I haven't come at a
bad time. I had no idea you were getting married." Her eyes were cold, almost flashing with hatred as she took in the sight of Billie in her dress. "Don't you look sweet?"

  "Actually, your timing couldn't be worse," Nick said. "Someone set a bomb off. People could have been killed."

  "Somebody obviously despises you as much as I do," Sheridan replied. She stepped closer, so close she was no more than an inch from his face. "Just who the hell do you think you are, sending the police to question Daddy and me? You're lucky he didn't come here personally. Isn't it bad enough that you ruined my life?

  "Your life hasn't been ruined, Sheridan, and I didn't say anything to the police. The stable hands saw the temper fits you pitched over here; you threatened to do everything but shoot me at close range. I'm sure they reported it when they were questioned."

  "My father is going to sue you—"

  "I'd hoped we could remain friends, Sheridan."

  "Screw you and this poor creature who thinks you're such a hot catch." She slapped him hard and stomped away.

  Billie put her finger to her eye. It was twitching again. And she had a headache. "I need a moment of quiet," she said.

  "And I need to restore some order," Nick told her.

  Billie wandered over to one of the limos. It was empty, and it looked dark and peaceful inside. She crawled in and closed her eyes.

  Someone tapped on the car's window. She glanced up and found Raoul's face pressed to the glass. She opened the door.

  "I have to get you out of here," he said. "You're in danger."

  "What?" Billie almost shrieked the words.

  "I'll tell you on the way," he said.

  "Tell me now!"

  "Get out of the limo fast. It may be rigged."

  "Rigged? You mean with a bomb?" Billie almost fell from the limo getting out of it. Raoul grabbed her arm, shoved her into his truck, and squealed away.

  "Where are we going?" Billie cried, watching the limo grow smaller as Raoul drove away like a madman.

  "Someplace safe."

  "How do you know I'm in danger?"

  Billie heard a loud explosion and turned. The limo literally flew apart before her very eyes and burst into flames. All she could do was stare in mute disbelief. Another thirty seconds, and she could have been killed! Her children had almost lost their mother. And what if they had been with her? The thought was too much to bear.

  A wave of dizziness swept over her as the realization of what could have happened hit with such a force, she thought she might be sick.

  * * * * *

  A horrified Nick raced blindly toward the burning limo; Max was right behind him. "Nick, wait!" the boy cried.

  "Mr. Kaharchek, stop!" the detective ordered. "It's not safe."

  "I've already called 911," one of the caterers yelled out.

  Nick couldn't hear for the steady roar in his head. He had to know if Billie was in the car. He fought the blazing heat without a thought for his own safety, tried to reach the door, but the flames made it impossible. Max and the detective grabbed him and literally tackled him.

  "Get your hands off me!" he shouted. "I have to see if she's in there! I have to know."

  Several of the security guards were at the scene with fire extinguishers. One of them was able to get a good look at the interior of the limo.

  "Mr. Kaharchek, your fiancee is not in the car," he said.

  "Are you sure?"

  "Yes. There's no one in the car."

  * * * * *

  "Raoul, would you please tell me where we're going?" Billie insisted, once they'd left the city limits behind and turned onto a dirt road.

  "I'm taking you to a safe house," he said, reaching over and patting her hand. "Try to calm down."

  "What do you mean, safe house?"

  "You need to know something about me," he said softly. "I'm not a bug man."

  Which explained why he hadn't been able to kill the spiders in her house, she thought. "I don't understand."

  "I'm an undercover police officer, and I've been posing as a pest-control man for a year, due to a string of burglaries in Loudoun County. Recently, I was assigned to protect you."

  "From whom?"

  "Nick Kaharchek, and now his crazy cousin, Max."

  Billie gaped in total disbelief. "What are you talking about?"

  "He isn't what he seems, Billie, you have to trust me on that one. And now that his crazy cousin Max is on the scene, it only makes my job harder."

  Everything suddenly felt even more disjointed. "I don't understand."

  "I'm not at liberty to discuss the details, but Kaharchek is involved in a number of shady deals headed up by some, um, unsavory figures."

  Billie just looked at him.

  "Nick's a player in a variety of money-making scams run by some of the most important people in the country."

  "Are you saying Nick is involved with the Mafia?"

  "That term is a little outdated, but the men he deals with will stop at nothing to get what they want, and they all operate under the guise of respectable businessmen, just like Nick." He paused. "Why do you suppose Nick refuses to print anything against the new developers who plan to build a damn city on prime marshland? That land has been preserved for hundreds of years, but all of a sudden it's up for grabs? Nick's behind the whole thing, and he stands to make a lot of money."

  "I don't believe you."

  "You will when he's indicted."

  Billie felt the blood rush to her ears. She could taste the disappointment in her mouth. Nick involved in illegal activities? It was hard to swallow. Had she let love blind her?

  "Is Max involved? Did he bomb Nick's car and start the fire in the stables?"

  Raoul looked at her. "Max knows all about Nick's business dealings, and he's just crazy enough to do whatever he can to stop them. He's like a kamikaze pilot who is so caught up in a cause he'd strap dynamite to his body and crash a plane into a crowd of innocent people, just so he can make a statement. The only reason Max is interested in hurting you is to get back at Nick."

  Billie was quiet as they turned onto yet another dirt road. "What about my children?" she said, a lump of fear forming in her throat. "How do I know Max won't try to harm them in my place?"

  "Your children and family are under protection as well. It's you we're most concerned about."

  Billie tried to let it all sink in.

  A few minutes later, Raoul pulled into the driveway of a ramshackle house and parked. "This is it," he said.

  Billie frowned. "You're kidding."

  "It's the best we could do on such short notice. Besides, you won't be here long."

  Billie followed him inside a musty room that smelled of old food and dirty clothing. She turned and found Raoul locking dead bolts with a key. "What are you doing?"

  "Securing the place. Nobody's going to get in if I don't want them to."

  Billie watched him put the keys in his pocket. Nobody was going to get out, either, she told herself.

  * * * * *

  Nick stood, hands on hips, his face streaked with soot from the fire. If Billie wasn't in the car, then where the heck was she? He'd been all through the house and she didn't seem to be on the grounds.

  "Are you looking for the bride?" one of the caterers asked. "I saw her leave with a man. He was driving a truck."

  "Raoul!" Max said. "I bet it was Raoul. That's why I was late to the wedding. I think Billie's bug man has her."

  "Bug man?"

  "His name is Raoul Hernandez."

  "You mean the pest-control man? I use his service. Why the hell would he have Billie?"

  "I think he's got a thing for her. Why do you think she has spiders all over the house?"

  Nick remembered Billie mentioning spiders to him the first time they'd met, and how she hated to enter a room with a spider in it. "Billie is scared of spiders," he said, thinking out loud. "At least she used to be."

  "And who better than Hernandez would know that? I think he's been bringing spide
rs into her house so Billie will keep calling him for service. As dumb as it sounds, I think he feels it'll make him look like a hero or something."

  Nick shook his head impatiently. Billie was missing, and Max was going off in God only knew what direction. "Get on with it, Max," he said.

  "I sort of got suspicious when Hernandez was unable to kill harmless spiders after numerous attempts, then I caught him looking at Billie when he didn't know anybody was looking. I'm telling you, Nick, the guy has it bad for her. I analyzed a canister of bug spray he left behind. It's sugar water and what I think may be granulated hamster food. Nobody in their right mind would ever spray that stuff to get rid of bugs. In fact, it's a primo bug banquet. Also, Raoul works on household repairs for Billie, simple things, but it takes him forever. I think he never gets around to fixing Billie's stuff right because it's an excuse to be with her. And I think he's created an entire epidemic of spiders and other insects in the neighborhood just so Billie won't get suspicious about the bugs in her place."

  Nick shook his head. "That sounds insane."

  "That's not all. After I found out that Hernandez has the keys to half the houses in the neighborhood, and that there have been a couple of break-ins around here in the past few days, I did some digging. He's only been in the business for a year or two, but all of the neighborhoods he services have experienced a recent rash of minor break-ins. Hernandez is a con man. He builds people's trust and confidence, and next thing they're giving him the keys to their places and asking him to pick up their mail and newspapers while they're away."

  "Then he robs them?"

  "Not right away. I think he has duplicate keys made and robs them at a later time so they won't suspect him."

  This time Nick frowned. "Why don't I know anything about the burglaries in Billie's neighborhood? I run a newspaper, dammit. My reporters do a column on police blotter stuff in the local section. Why haven't I seen anything in the newspaper, and why hasn't Billie mentioned it?" Then Nick realized he'd only scanned the front page since the bombing of his car, because he'd been so preoccupied. He'd been away from the office more in the past few weeks than he had in years, so he hadn't talked to the reporters on the local beat lately. And minor burglaries didn't make headlines.