Indelible Love Series + Entwined Bundle

by DW Cee

  The phone rang and interrupted us.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey,” a tender and sweet response greeted me. “Whatcha doing?”

  “I’m sitting here chatting with Sheila, my sister-in-law.”

  “And Dani?”

  “Dani is out with her cousins and Ian.”

  “Ian?”

  “Yeah. He decided to come up here early with us.”

  “Your daughter has the same Kingston charm as her mother. Ian can’t stay away from her – epitome of whipped.”

  “Yeah and I’m thrilled for her. Ian reminds me a lot of Paul. Even at his young age, I see the love in his eyes when he looks at my daughter. He’ll take good care of her. I just pray that Dani doesn’t do something stupid and drive him away.”

  “Being with Paul’s family making you sad?”

  “Yeah.” My nose got that tingling sensation and there was pressure coming from the back of my eyes. Next up, there’d be tears.

  Sheila stepped in and took the phone from me. “Hi Jamie. This is Sheila. I want to know what your intentions are with my dearest sister-in-law. You know she’s very precious to our family.”

  She kept nodding her head and saying, “uh-huh.”

  “And what about your mother?”

  Once again, her head bopped up and down. I walked back into the kitchen and got rid of my coffee and brought a glass of wine for the both of us instead. Sheila was still on the phone.

  “Jamie, why don’t you come up this weekend and join us? Mike and I would love to meet you.”

  Her invitation brought forth a sense of panic. Mike couldn’t be happy that his late brother’s wife was seeing someone again. I kept shaking my head no but Sheila ignored me.

  “I see. Okay, let me know. Here’s Olivia.”

  With the mouthpiece covered, I gave a strangled protest.

  “It’s okay. I’ve told Mike about Jamie and Joe and Lydia seem to know about him as well. We’d like to meet him.” She chuckled at my anxiety and took a sip of her wine.

  “Hey. Did Sheila give you the third degree?”

  “Didn’t you hear it all?”

  “No, I walked away for a while.”

  “You can ask her if I passed the test. I’ll let you go, but since I’ve got an invitation from Sheila to join you, I’m coming up for the weekend.”

  “Jamie… please don’t spend Mother’s Day with us and not with your own mom. As it is she doesn’t like me. That would not be a wise move.”

  “Livvy…” He stopped himself then added, “maybe you’re right. I’ll call you again tomorrow.”

  “Okay. Goodnight.”

  “I love you, Liv.”

  I hung up without responding. Though it was me who told him not to come up, I was disappointed he so easily agreed. His mother would always be his first priority. Since Dani was my first priority, perhaps it was only fair he placed someone else above me as well.

  “Well?” Sheila asked.

  “Well, what?”

  “Is he coming? He told me he’d have to discuss it with you. He said you didn’t extend an invitation to him for this weekend even though Ian got one for Africa.”

  “He was going to come till I reminded him of his mother. He then backed off and decided to stay home.”

  “Uh-oh. One of those, huh?”

  “Yep, one of those. He’s the only boy of four children – maybe a bit of a momma’s boy. Definitely not as much of a caretaker nor as independent as Paul.”

  “There are very few who can stand up tall against Paul. Even Mike falls short in the husband category when compared to Paul.”

  “Hey, I heard that,” Mike yelled from the kitchen. “Who do you think took care of Paul when Mom and Dad left for Africa? All he learned, he learned from his older brother.”

  “Whatever,” Sheila yelled back.

  I missed Paul. I missed his laugh. I missed his warmth. But most of all, I missed his love.

  Irreplaceable.

  Unconditional.

  Unending.

  But unfortunately, all of these were now nonexistent.

  “That was so cool, Aunt Olivia,” Leslie gushed. “I can’t believe how many guys asked you out tonight. How do you do it? Please, can you teach Lisa? She hasn’t had a date in like, a year or two.”

  “Shut up, Leslie. I went out with my co-worker just the other night.”

  "You mean that geek who showed up at our door looking like Poindexter? How can he drive with glasses so thick?”

  “You’re such a moron, Leslie. Just because he's not great looking doesn’t mean he’s not a nice person.”

  “Great looking? Oh my gosh, he was nowhere near great looking.”

  We walked in the house and the argument continued.

  “How was dinner?”

  “So cool!” Leslie responded before everyone. “Ask Auntie Olivia what happened tonight.”

  Mike, Sheila and my mom all stared at me for an explanation. I kept mum.

  “Some guy asked Mrs. Kingston out on a date.” Ian explained in a nutshell.

  “But that’s not all,” Heather interjected. “When Auntie Liv turned him down, several times, he got up on stage and told everyone he would pick up the dinner tab for every table if she’d say yes to his offer.”

  “Then everyone pressured Mom to accept the date just because they wanted a free meal.”

  “But Aunt Olivia stuck to her guns even with strong pressure from the entire restaurant, and she turned down the guy,” Lisa finished the story. “And after that, all the single guys started coming up to our table, asking her out. Even some of the young guys wanted to date her.”

  “Mrs. Kingston. I’m definitely going to have to torture Jamie with this story.”

  “Alright, everyone. I think your Aunt needs to be away from all you young folks. Ian, do you want me to set up the couch for you?”

  Dani and Ian both blushed at Sheila’s question. They were darling together.

  “No thank you, Mrs. Kingston. I need to get back to my sister’s. My parents came in today and asked when I was coming back. They asked if I’ve become a Kingston.” We all laughed. “Would it be okay if Dani spent the day with my family, tomorrow?”

  “Of course, Ian.”

  “Actually, my mom’s going to call you in the morning and ask if you’d like to have brunch with us.”

  “I’d love to. Please let her know I’ll be expecting her call.”

  “Okay. Goodnight, everyone.”

  “Goodnight, Ian…” Heather, Lisa and Leslie gleefully sang out while making kissy noises to Dani who walked Ian out.

  “Why can’t any of my girls find a great boy like Ian?” Sheila lamented. “Why don’t you three go to the brunch with Dani and see if Ian has any older cousins he can introduce you to since they live up here?”

  “Oh, Mom.” All three girls moaned and walked upstairs.

  “Mom, you want to have a cup of tea with me?” I asked, hoping for some desperately needed alone time with her.

  “Sure. I’ll make us some,” she offered and walked away from us.

  “Dani, I’ll see you in a bit?”

  “Sure, Mom. You might want to call back Jamie. Your phone’s been ringing off the hook. You want me to call him and tell him you’ll call later?”

  “No, honey. That’s okay. I’ll call him tomorrow.”

  It was quiet once everyone went upstairs to do their own thing. Dani was probably on the phone with Ian, though they just parted and my beautiful nieces were most likely getting ready for bed and a full day of work. Mom and I had been apart for years till Paul died. She stayed with us for a while after the accident but she had to get back to Connecticut to care for her ailing mother.

  I hugged my dear mother before sitting down to tea.

  “How have you been doing by yourself? Any thought of moving back to Los Angeles?”

  “Your grandmother left me so much junk to sort through after she died, it’ll take me years before I can get my lif
e together and move again. Plus, I need to go sort through her house in New Jersey, too. I’m thinking once I sort through your grandma’s matters, I may sell the Connecticut home and move to Jersey.”

  “Yeah? How come?”

  “That’s where I grew up and it feels more familiar. And also, that house has been in our family for generations whereas this home is relatively new.”

  “Maybe I’ll come move in with you while Dani is on the east coast. What do you think, Mom?”

  “What about Jamie?”

  Pause.

  Sigh.

  Pause.

  “I don’t know if this will last, Mom.”

  “Why do you say that? Last I spoke with Jamie he said he wanted to live at least half a century with you.”

  “We love each other but I don’t know if it’s enough. Back at twenty-two, it didn’t matter what the circumstances were. I was in love and I married only for love. I was fortunate to have been in love with such a fine man as Paul. It would have been a disaster if I’d met a bad guy. But now, it’s all so complicated.” Mom stayed silent but put her hand over mine. “I have Dani to think about, I have Rose and Harry and the rest of his family to worry about, and I’d like for him to have kids one day. I don’t think I’m the right person to give him that idyllic life he so deserves.”

  Mom chuckled heartily.

  “Why are you laughing? I find none of this funny.”

  “I laugh because you’ve grown up so much. You’re finally an adult.”

  “What?” I tried to sound as astounded as possible but I knew what Mom was talking about. Paul’s death woke me up to reality.

  “Olivia. If this relationship troubles you so much, then end it now and move on. There are other men out there. You can start again.”

  “But, I love him, Mom.” That came out sounding a bit immature and whiney. Mom laughed again.

  “If you really love him, then work for this relationship. You had it too easy with Paul the last eighteen years. He practically handed you everything on a silver platter. You don’t know what it means to work through a relationship. Either decide now to drop Jamie or keep him and be happy no matter what the circumstances.”

  “Oh, Mother. You are ever so practical and wise. I will take your sage words to heart and make a decision. Let’s move on to happier topics like Dani and Ian. Isn’t he a dream? He reminds me of Paul.”

  Our conversation went well past midnight and we refilled our teacups several times. I thanked God for my mother and hoped I was half the mother to Dani as my mother was to me.

  We arrived at home to a bouquet of flowers at our doorstep. Mother’s Day celebration started at breakfast in Seattle so Dani and I could come home to Los Angeles by late afternoon.

  I love you madly. I missed you terribly. Happy Mother’s Day.

  Jamie

  “I see somebody’s been a little lonely,” my daughter smirked. “Wait till Ian and I fill him in on all the details of our trip.”

  “Danielle Kingston. Don’t tease Jamie.”

  “Oh, but it’s so much fun.”

  She ran away cackling before I could smack her on her rear end.

  I had a phone call to make and an apology to give. After talking with Mom the second night, I texted Jamie and told him I needed alone time to think about us. That was the last I’d responded to his messages. It wasn’t fair but it was necessary for me to clear my head and to come to a conclusion about us.

  “Liv!” He picked up on the first ring. “You’re home?”

  “Yes. We just got here. Thank you for the gorgeous arrangement.”

  “Stay right there. I’m coming over.”

  Without waiting for an answer, he hung up. Quickly, I rushed into the house, started a load of laundry and changed into comfortable clothes. As though he’d been waiting around the corner, Jamie pulled into our driveway within minutes of our conversation.

  Two by two, he hopped up the porch steps and came in through the opened front door. His arms crushed my body in the fiercest most longing hug ever known to woman.

  “I missed you so much,” he whispered.

  “I missed you, too.”

  “I love you. Don’t leave me. I don’t care about our differences. I just want to be with you.” He looked so frightened.

  “I love you too and I’m not leaving you. I’ve decided not to care about our differences either. I, too, just want to be with you. We’ll work everything out.”

  His arms were squeezing the life out of me at this point.

  “Jamie, you have to let me go or I’ll break in half.”

  “Sorry.” As his arms somewhat let go, his lips now became the crushing body part.

  “Ahem,” Dani called from the top of the steps with her hand partially covering her eyes. “Minor in the house.”

  “Can the minor go back to her room for about another hour?”

  “Is that your version of a greeting? Hi Jamie, How are you? I’m fine thank you.”

  “Come on Dani. Throw me a bone.”

  “I’ll throw you a delicious bone and tell you what Mom’s been up to in Seattle without you.”

  Jamie hesitated but curiosity won. “Okay. Tattle on your mother. How much fun could she have had without me?”

  “Oh, loads!”

  Dani gave Jamie a play by play of where we went, what we did, and whom we met. Jamie took the whole restaurant incident in stride and he even felt sorry for the guys I turned down.

  “So, all in all, I’d say we had a good time with our family but it was evident to us all, Mom missed you.”

  “Hey. My family is having dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant for Mother’s Day. You two want to join us?”

  “This is a special day for your mother. I don't want to ruin it.”

  “Mom promised to give us a chance. She’s willing to get to know you.”

  “How about we work on us first then we work on your family? I’d like to just spend some time with you and get back on the right track. Can I get a rain check on dinner?”

  “Yeah?”

  I nodded ‘yeah’ in answer.

  “Can I come back after dinner?” he whispered into my ear.

  I nodded a yeah, again.

  Between post-season softball, graduation and Jamie stopping by the house like he owned the place, I started feeling comfortable about our relationship. Jamie was introduced to many of the parents on the softball team and I joined Jamie on all of his social and business functions. We were a steady couple going through the honeymoon stage of our relationship finding life in general to be a complete joy.

  My astute and kind-hearted daughter purposely spent nights at her best friend, Jessie’s house to give me some flexibility with Jamie. We took advantage of every one of those nights. Jamie and I had an unexpectedly fun evening with his sister Melissa and her husband Matt but then there were those painful days where Rose insisted I go see OBs, fertility specialists and any other doctor she could think of to keep the Hutchison name alive. Though it went against my good instincts to participate in all these inane doctors’ visits, in the spirit of getting along with possible, future in-laws, I complied.

  “How did the doctor’s appointment go today?” Jamie sounded more hopeful than I wished.

  “Not much different than any of the other ones. They won’t say that I can’t have kids but chances are slim.”

  “Oh…” He was disappointed.

  Watching his face morph from day to night, I waited for his next words of comfort that never came.

  “Jamie…we can end this now and you can go have a family with someone who can provide it for you.”

  “Why do you always insist on us breaking up?” It was odd how torn and strangled his voice sounded uttering this sentence. He was mad on the one hand and yet I sensed relief?

  That hurt. Frankly, it more than hurt. It left me numb.

  “Why don’t we see each other tomorrow?” I whispered and walked out of the kitchen towards my bedroom wondering if thi
s was karma getting back at me for having lived the perfect life with Paul.

  Sitting on my bed sniffling away, memories of my last pregnancy flitted through my thoughts.

  “Guess what?” I whispered to Paul in bed after making glorious love.

  “What, princess?”

  “I’m pregnant again.”

  “Princess, I love making babies with you! I still hope for a house full of kids who look and act just like you.”

  “You happy?”

  “Ecstatic!”

  “You think Dani will be happy?”

  “Um…not sure. There will be an eighteen year gap between the two kids. We’ll find out in the morning.”

  “I’d like a boy who looks just like his daddy.”

  “I just want one who will stick around for nine months and pop out healthy like our Dani. I want you to take it easy, okay? And, if we lose this baby, it’s not the end of the world. We have Dani and I have you. We don’t have to have another child. It kills me to see you so distraught whenever you miscarry. Can you promise me you’ll accept any outcome without too much grief?”

  Oh Paul… what famous last words. How could I accept any outcome without too much grief when the outcome left us with only half our family.

  “Hey.” Jamie sat next to me on the bed.

  “Hey.”

  He put his arms around my neck and I bawled. I bawled for the husband and child I lost. I bawled for the children I couldn’t give Jamie. But mostly I bawled knowing deep down this relationship couldn’t work. Though it was cut short, I had lived a full life with Paul and Dani already. Jamie had yet to experience this fullness. In the end, I couldn’t give him all he needed and deserved out of life.

  “Since Dani is going up to Seattle next week, can we get away next weekend?”

  A possible last weekend together. I’d work up the courage to end our relationship. I nodded yes.

  “Where should we go?”

  “Doesn’t matter.”

  “Let’s go Friday to Sunday, then we’ll pick up Dani from the airport and go to my dad’s birthday barbeque. It’s at their house and the whole family will be there. I’d like for you to meet everyone.”