Hearts and Minds (A Shifter Chronicles Story, Sequel to Healing Minds)

by M. D. Grimm

  “Maybe they have, and they haven’t said anything.”

  Mac shook his head. “I’ve been careful, with my words, my actions. I’ve never let it slip.”

  Josh smiled slightly, abashed. “You’ve done better than me. Sorry.”

  Mac shook his head and patted Josh’s hand. “You’ve always been a good friend. I don’t really mind if you know. I was just shocked, you know? Maybe this will be a good thing. Now I can at least talk to someone about it.” Mac met Josh’s gaze. “If you’re able to keep this a secret.”

  Josh lifted his hand to his chest and drew an “X” over his heart. Mac smiled, though it was strained.

  They were quiet for a few moments before Josh said quietly, “You shouldn’t have fallen for the boss.”

  Mac snorted. “Don’t I know it. It’s not like I chose to.”

  “Yeah, I know how it is. I didn’t plan to fall for a shifter, but here I am.”

  “Yeah, here you are.” Mac sighed heavily. “You’re so damn lucky. You and Poe.”

  It was a shock for Josh to learn that not long after he’d become mates with Xavier, that Poe, the top agent, had become mates with Nordik, a master shifter and guardian of Sanctuary. Josh didn’t believe it at first but it was the irrefutable truth. Josh gripped Mac’s hand, feeling for his friend. He also heard the tinge of envy. “So…. Odin doesn’t know at all?”

  Mac gulped. “Good God, no. I’d die of humiliation.”

  Josh nodded. “I… If I can do anything….”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  Josh looked at Xavier as he rounded the corner to talk to the landscapers. The sun shone off the sweat on Xavier’s brow, on his smile. Josh really was lucky and blessed to have what he did. It had been completely unexpected and perhaps not welcomed, but it was here and he wouldn’t change a thing. He had no regrets. The events of last night couldn’t alter that. So what if Xavier was overprotective? It was sweet in its own way.

  Xavier turned, and noticed Josh’s attention. He grinned and waved. Josh waved back. The anger he’d held onto since last night vanished. It was resentful anger that could easily be resolved with some words, some understanding. It wasn’t worth this tension, this distance. He didn’t want it. He wanted his mate. They could make their relationship work, and they could make this clinic work. They weren’t alone. They had each other; he needed to remember that. They could do this.

  Josh looked at Mac and squeezed his hand tighter. He needed to remember that not everyone was as blessed.

  Chapter Four

  Xavier kicked himself for not shopping earlier. It was the morning of Valentine’s Day, and not only were most shops closed, or would have a delayed opening, the items left weren’t up to his standards. And it was snowing. Big, white puffy snow flurries were falling on the town, covering everything in a white sheet. There was no indication when or if it would let up. Thank Fenris he’d seen the weather report and put chains on the truck.

  If Xavier was truthful with himself, all he wanted was the entire day to just spend with Josh, getting naked and worshiping each other. But he figured Josh wanted romance and—fuck—he really didn’t do romance.

  Would Josh even want to do something for Valentine’s Day? They hadn’t really spoken since the morning after Freddie’s fit. Duties yanked them apart constantly, and exhaustion kept his mind from functioning properly come night. Wasn’t it actually quite trivial to worry about something as stupid as Valentine’s Day?

  At least they’d given the workers the day off, so the clinic was unusually quiet. It was almost eerie. No hammering or sawing or cursing or laughing. Most of the patients were spending time with their families at the hotel in downtown Haven or enjoying time in Sanctuary, despite the snow. That meant it was basically him, Josh, and Mac. Mac expressed interest in touring Haven, so Xavier thought it would be the perfect time to accost Josh and persuade him not to work. Xavier had thought to give everyone the day off last evening, after hearing about the potential for snow, and figured it was the best way to make sure Josh had no excuse to work.

  Xavier drove back to the clinic, empty-handed of any gift and feeling rather rotten about it. Josh meant everything to him, so shouldn’t he express that in some way? Hell, he was better expressing it through sex.

  Grumbling, Xavier parked the truck and got out, immediately pelted with snow puffs. Josh sat on the porch steps, resting his chin in his palms. But when he caught sight of Xavier, he jumped to his feet. Xavier couldn’t stay in a bad mood, not when Josh grinned like that, when he was dressed in a snappy shirt, pants, and shoes, and smelled like he’d showered recently. Xavier’s inner wolf growled in appreciation and felt rather cuddly at that moment.

  Xavier walked up the porch steps, out of the snow, and wrapped his arms around Josh’s waist, kissing him deeply. Josh melted into him, just like he should, and wrapped his arms around his neck. Josh’s heat warmed Xavier inside and out, and he hardened predictably. While his wolf demanded he dominate and devour, Xavier wanted to take his time. All thoughts of even trying for romance fled as he cupped Josh’s ass and lifted him. Josh wrapped his legs around Xavier’s waist and continued kissing him as Xavier carried Josh to their bedroom. Once he’d kicked the door shut, he felt Josh wiggle to escape.

  He growled and tightened his hold. Josh pulled his mouth away, and Xavier proceeded to lick and suck at his throat.

  “Hey, X, wait. I wanna show—”

  “I wanna see you,” he said, his voice rough. He carried Josh to the bed and laid him down on it. Then he shoved his hand into Josh’s pants.

  “But I”—Josh’s pupils dilated and his breath shuddered—“okay, have it your way.”

  As his inner wolf pranced with success, Xavier devoured Josh’s mouth again, thrusting his tongue inside. A sense of urgency drove him, and he felt the need to reassert the intimacy in their relationship, he had to show Josh that he belonged to him, with him. They belonged together, and that Xavier wouldn’t be here, in this place, without him. Josh had healed him, his heart, his mind. He could only think of one way to express his gratitude, and he felt like he’d been denied his ability to show Josh just how much he loved him.

  Still kissing Josh, he tugged his mate’s pants and yanked off his shoes. Soon, Josh was naked from the waist down, and Xavier let his hands roam over his flesh, remembering it, relishing it. Josh made the cutest sounds, moans and whimpers coming from his throat. Xavier danced his fingers danced over Josh’s ribs, slid over his flat stomach, and rubbed and stroked his groin. He cupped Josh’s balls and groaned himself. They were full and heavy, and Josh’s erection was hot and hard, already dripping. His scent filled the room, filled Xavier’s lungs. Was there anything more arousing than the knowledge that he made his mate hard with the slightest touch?

  Xavier finished the disrobing by pulling Josh’s shirt and jacket off. Josh looked dazed, his lips swollen. But even as he reached to touch Xavier, Xavier gripped his wrists and pushed his arms to the mattress. Then he lay completely over Josh and proceeded to torment him with licks and sucks across his collarbone, his chest, his nipples. Josh moaned, his body quivering, pressing closer to him. Xavier growled, his skin rippling as his wolf relished the fun as well.

  Xavier suspected Josh liked being dominated like this. When he lifted his eyes to Josh’s face, his suspicions were confirmed. Josh never made any effort to escape, and his brilliant blue eyes were hazy with desire and the want for more.

  “You, naked,” Josh said, gasping, a plea in his voice.

  Xavier knelt on the bed and took off his shirt. Josh’s groan and look of appreciation upon seeing his chest fed his ego. How could he not be delighted when Josh still found him attractive? For himself, he thought Josh was the cutest and most delectable man in the world.

  Josh tugged at his zipper, and Xavier made quick work of his shoes and pants before rejoining his mate on the bed. Now it was Josh’s turn to explore with his hands. Josh stroked over Xavier’s chest, tweaked his nipples, fingers dancing
over his ribs. Then those hands dug into Xavier’s back, and his muscles quivered, craving more of Josh’s touch.

  If a bomb went off, Xavier wouldn’t give a crap.

  Josh gripped Xavier’s erection and stroked him with one hand while squeezing his tip with the other. Xavier gasped, his muscles clenching as pleasure burst inside him. Josh had mightily talented hands. Josh grinned a little smugly. Xavier smiled, knowing that two could play at that game. He slipped down Josh’s body and grabbed his erection, pumping twice before slipping it into his mouth. Josh bowed off the bed, and he grunted.

  “Xavier—God, I love you,” Josh whimpered.

  Xavier closed his eyes tightly even as the flavor of his mate exploded in his mouth. He sucked harder, Josh’s cock dripping, and cupped his balls, squeezing.

  “Fuck!” Josh said as he came.

  But Xavier wasn’t done. After he’d licked Josh’s erection clean, his mouth descended and sucked on his balls, rolling one, then the other in his mouth. Afterward he licked Josh’s inner thighs, which he knew to be incredibly sensitive. Josh shuddered and cursed some more. There were more freckles there, and Xavier found them incredibly sexy. That, and the fact that Josh’s thatch of curls around his groin was as red as those on his head. Xavier never thought of himself as a fan of redheads, but he was a huge fan of this one.

  His mouth lowered farther, and he pushed Josh’s legs up and out as his tongue trailed over Josh’s most intimate place.

  “Hell yes!”

  Xavier smiled. He knew all of Josh’s weaknesses and pleasure points.

  After he’d sufficiently worked Josh up once again, where he was nearly fully erect, Xavier kissed him again, and Josh tangled his hands in Xavier’s hair.

  “Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me,” Josh chanted, frenzied. Xavier’s wolf howled with triumph. Josh tormented Xavier with quick, hard kisses. “Fuck me, damn you.”

  Xavier would have laughed if he’d had enough air. Instead, he obeyed his mate’s demand and disentangled himself long enough to reach over to the nightstand to pull out a bottle of lube. Josh attacked his back, nipping and kissing, his hands gripping any flesh he could. Xavier groaned with need, and his wolf was nearly frantic to dominate Josh.

  Xavier turned and pounced, shoving Josh on his back again. Josh glared at him.

  “Hurry up, wolf.”

  “Yes, dear,” Xavier said mockingly. He then gave Josh a hard kiss before kneeling and shoving Josh’s legs up. Josh complied and spread his legs wider, bending his knees toward his chest. Xavier slicked his fingers, Josh’s hole, and then shoved his fingers inside. Josh hissed and gripped the sheets. Xavier hadn’t been inside Josh for weeks. Weeks. But he was today. He was going to make up for lost time and fuck Josh into the mattress… several times.

  He nearly lost control when Josh’s muscles contracted around his fingers, and his heat… fucking Fenris, his heat!

  When Josh finally yelled, “fuck me!” Xavier knew he was ready.

  He slicked his cock, gripped Josh’s hips, and pushed inside with one thrust. Josh let out what sounded like a sob, and his body welcomed Xavier by clenching around him. Xavier gasped and had to still his movements, lest he come too soon. It wasn’t easy, since Josh wouldn’t lie still.

  “Move! Please, X.”

  “Just a minute,” he grunted. With slow breaths and after he dug deep for control, he managed to calm enough to start moving. He began slow, much to Josh’s frustration, but then he sped up, thrusting harder. This was what he’d wanted and been denied—Josh lying open underneath him, entering his mate’s body, and eliciting those sweet sounds from Josh. There were very particular sounds Josh made when being penetrated, and Xavier realized just how much he’d missed them.

  He managed to prolong the pleasure, causing both of them to become sweaty and breathless, and Josh was starting to beg him for release. Xavier angled his thrusts, and on the third attempt, he found Josh’s prostate. Josh covered his face with his hands, and his muscles clenched as he gave a shout.

  Xavier leaned over and shoved away Josh’s hands to kiss him deeply. Josh locked his arms and legs around Xavier as he kept thrusting. Josh seemed to be trying to suck his soul right out of his mouth, and if Xavier could, he would give it to him. Josh owned him, mind, body, and soul.

  And, more vitally, his heart.

  Josh came with a scream. Xavier came after one more thrust. Xavier slumped on top of Josh and vaguely wondered if he’d ever get enough air into his lungs again. The scent of them hung in the air, and it soothed both Xavier and his wolf. He’d missed that smell.

  Xavier only realized he’d fallen asleep when he woke up, still on top of Josh. He managed to find the strength to roll off him and lie flat on his back with a grunt. Looking over, he saw that Josh’s color was still high and he was radiating body heat. Reaching over, Xavier rubbed his hand lightly over Josh’s chest. He was sure Josh was fast asleep, but still, Josh rolled closer to him and curled against his body.

  Even as he wrapped his arms around Josh, he felt love so profound it hurt. To think, that even after all he’d done and who he’d been, he somehow deserved such a beautiful man. It was a gift he would never take for granted.

  Josh woke up and was so amazingly satisfied, he determined that sex was the best kind of drug. He nuzzled Xavier’s chest, and Xavier tightened his arms around him.

  “While I knew we’d end up here eventually,” he said, his voice slightly hoarse, “I had planned on some romance first.”

  “What?”

  Josh looked across the room at the table he’d set with candles, flowers, and a meal Bruno had prepared to his specifications. He gestured to the table, then looked at Xavier’s face. It was amusing to watch the confusion turn into shock, then into guilt.

  “Oh, wow. Sorry, Josh. I—”

  “Silly, don’t be sorry.” Josh laughed and kissed Xavier on the cheek. “Happy Valentine’s Day, Xavier. I love you.”

  Xavier met his gaze and guilt gave way to gratitude. “I love you too, Josh.” He stroked a hand over Josh’s hair, and Josh nearly purred.

  “I’m sorry I’m not better at the ‘romantic’ gig.”

  “I guess it depends on what you define as ‘romantic’.” Josh stroked Xavier’s slightly scratchy chin. He needed to shave nearly twice a day. “I don’t mind ‘mind-blowing sex’ to be that definition. You do it so well.”

  Xavier laughed.

  “Besides, why do we have to be conventional?” he said.

  “Jack and Travis aren’t.”

  Josh grinned. “I like their idea. Should we establish a tradition like that?”

  “I kinda thought we were.”

  Josh raised an eyebrow even as his stomach jumped. “Making love the entire day? Has merit.”

  Xavier laughed again.

  They ate in bed, feeding each other. Then they made love again, but this time, Josh straddled Xavier and determined the speed. He kept it slow at first, taking Xavier gently inside him, feeling everything. Xavier’s eyes were so gold and glowed in the darkened room. They only had the candles to give light, and it lent such sensuality to the atmosphere, with shadows half hiding, half revealing skin, and the need for touch to take over sight. Josh found himself losing all his self-consciousness. While he knew Xavier liked the look of him, he still wasn’t very thrilled with his skinniness.

  But none of that mattered now, since Xavier seemed to be unable to stop touching him. Xavier slid his callused hands up Josh’s waist, over his stomach, and Josh erupted in goosebumps. The sensations danced up his spine, and the pleasure kept him hard. Xavier grabbed his erection and slowly tugged, even as he began to thrust up, causing the pleasure to come from both ends. Xavier was so big and stretched him so wonderfully, it was hard to keep from coming instantly. But Xavier’s stroking hand and the look in his eyes couldn’t be resisted anymore. Josh came with a deep groan. Then Xavier flipped them, and with two more hard thrusts, Xavier came as well. Xavier rolled them again until they lay on their
sides. Josh kissed Xavier’s face, slightly delirious. A deep growl came from Xavier’s chest, and Josh delighted in the sound.

  They lay there for a few quiet moments, their arms wrapped around the other.

  Josh spoke into the silence. “I know you want to keep me safe, Xavier. I don’t mind, not really. But… I don’t like the orders.”

  Xavier heaved a large sigh. “Yeah, I know. It was instinct, Josh. I fell back on my own training. I took charge.”

  Josh nodded. “Okay, I get that.” He sat up, met Xavier’s eye. “But don’t order me around like you own me.”

  Xavier opened his mouth. Josh stared hard at him. Xavier blew out a breath.

  “I’m sorry it sounded like that to you. I didn’t mean it that way. I didn’t know what to expect with Freddie, Josh. The bottom line is, I wanted you safe and nowhere near danger.”

  “If we’re going to help all shifters, I will encounter dangerous ones.”

  Xavier paled and his eyes flickered with hard determination. “I know that. I’m trying to swallow that. But I don’t have to like it.”

  Josh smiled slightly. “No, no, you don’t have to like it. I remember what you did for me, X. Don’t think I’ll ever forget that you killed to save my life. But that can’t be the way we solve everything.”

  Xavier stroked Josh’s head, sending a pleasurable chill down his spine.

  “I can’t change, Josh. I won’t, not even for you. If you’re in danger, I will stand in front of you, and I will kill anything that threatens you. You have to accept that. You have to accept me.”

  Josh realized there was more to his words, to his tone, than what was on the surface. He took a deep breath, swallowed.

  “I do accept you,” he whispered before kissing Xavier softly. “I always have, remember?”

  Xavier smiled. “Yeah, I remember.”

  Josh’s mind lit on an idea. “You could train me.”