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Deadlock

Page 23

by Cherrie Lynn


  “Lindsey, if you want to throw us out and never speak to us again, we get it,” Sully said, approaching her bed opposite Jace. “We deserve it. Me especially. I know they altered your code, and you…” She gestured the length of Lindsey’s body. “You are a total badass to take that on yourself. I know you didn’t do it to impress us, but I for one am impressed. I’m here for anything you might need—just say the word. Or tell me to fuck off. Either way, I’m at your service.”

  “Thank you,” Lindsey said, surprised at the weight that lifted from her chest during the apology. She didn’t know them well, but she liked them. She respected them. It had hurt to be the source of their mistrust. “That means a lot. It really does.”

  “So we don’t have to fuck off?” Helix asked from where he’d dropped into a chair in the corner of the room.

  “No.” Lindsey laughed. “Well, maybe when I want time alone with this one.”

  Laughter and catcalls filled the room while Jace gave them the finger.

  She needed that time more than anything else right then. To know he was okay, that they were okay. Would he even tell her if they weren’t? She stared at him as he joked with his team, his strong profile, his piercing eyes, and wondered at the secrets he was keeping from her at this very moment. It wasn’t over. It couldn’t just…be over. Not after everything Rhys had done, what the Libra Cooperative might do next.

  After a time, the others left them so she could rest. Jace stayed, stroking her hand as he held it between his. She didn’t want to sleep, though. She wanted to lie here and look at him for as long as she could. “Am I safe here?” she asked softly.

  “We’re monitoring the hospital network,” he returned just as softly. She lay here day after day, helplessly confined to this bed with the knowledge that Libra could break in, alter her meds, and assassinate her in a heartbeat. Jace and his team had already been one step ahead. “I don’t want you to worry about anything except healing.”

  “Will you have to leave me?”

  His eyebrows drew together, creating a perfect line between them. “Why would I leave you?”

  She blew out a breath. “You talked about having to move the team, so I figured that meant far away. Somewhere I wouldn’t know about.”

  “If I were smart, that’s what I would do. But turns out I’m kind of a dumbass.”

  Lindsey smacked his hand lightly. “No, you aren’t. You’re probably the most intelligent person I know.”

  He lowered his chin to rest it on her bed rail, eyes tilted up to her. She’d never really noticed how long and thick his eyelashes were. She would gladly spend the rest of her life noticing these beautiful little details about him. “I’m not. I didn’t trust you. Not a hundred percent. I wouldn’t let myself.”

  “Well, my personal feelings aside, that only proves you’re smart.”

  “If I had, maybe you wouldn’t have run off and gotten yourself hurt.”

  “Or maybe they would have found their moment and taken me anyway. Please don’t beat yourself up. I got beat up enough for both of us.”

  “Christ, Lindsey—”

  “Shh.” She lifted a finger to place against his lips. He promptly kissed it, then captured it and pressed her hand against his clean-shaven cheek.

  “I would’ve taken every hit for you,” he said. “And more. I should have been there to do it. I wish it had been me.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t. Never. Not for a second. In fact, this—all of this—led me to you. And no matter how hard I try, I’m not sure I can regret any of it.”

  So gently it almost made her cry, he smoothed her hair back from her forehead. “I wish I could hold you,” he murmured.

  “There isn’t much room in this bed, but we can try.”

  “No, I don’t want to hurt you. Just rest. Get better. I have a lot of time to make up for.”

  The thought of that time made her supremely happy. “Oh yeah, I meant to tell you. Thanks for not choking my sister on sight,” she said. “I still don’t have many answers there, but I think I learned a lot about her throughout this.” Of course, she couldn’t tell him everything, even if she eventually learned it all. And she never for a second believed he would forgive Lena, nor expect him to. But it was important, somehow, that Lena’s sacrifices not go completely unappreciated. If she had to champion her sister to everyone from now on, well, Lena deserved that much.

  He looked at her oddly for a moment, and she thought he was about to ask her something but thought better of it. Then he lifted a shoulder in a nonchalant shrug that was almost the mirror image of Lena’s. Lena’s act. “No problem. I think I can refrain.”

  He knows.

  It was that deep, primal intuition that had no reason or explanation behind it. As usual, she wasn’t quite sure she could fully trust it. But that faint whisper in the core of her soul couldn’t be ignored. The one that said he’d known and he’d kept it from her.

  He would’ve had to, though, right? He couldn’t go around crowing about her sister being CIA. Not even to Lena’s own family.

  But what else was he keeping from her?

  No. No, no, no. Whatever secrets and knowledge he had were his to keep, just as hers were her own. As of this moment.

  If Jace were privy to her inner turmoil right then, he didn’t show it. Maybe she was becoming a good actor as well. Hell, she was surrounded by them, so why not? She gave him a smile and asked him for another kiss.

  His lips were infinitely gentle on her cut, but she felt the barely restrained hunger behind the sweetness. It called to her own. Even her battered body awakened, just from that touch of his lips, that tiny teasing swipe of his tongue against hers. She sighed, and groaned, and wished for more.

  “I want to kiss you everywhere you hurt,” he murmured.

  “That would be everywhere.”

  “That’s what I have in mind.”

  Doubts and secrets…those were for tomorrow. Those were for some future far in the distance. What she had right now was him, whole, beside her. She would focus on that. It was all that mattered. All the worry, all the fear, all the anxiety, had led her straight to here, right where he was. She was injured and in pain, sure, but she would heal in time. Physically, anyway. Mentally, emotionally, she would have a long way to go, but she wasn’t as afraid of that road to recovery as she probably should be. Because he would be at her side through it all.

  Everything else could wait.

  Epilogue

  She crossed her legs and laced her fingers demurely in her lap, staring at the panel of suited men and women in front of her. Her boss, her boss’s boss. And his boss after that. The bureaucracy always amused her, the intimidating appearances, the assessing looks. They always thought they could see something she was trying to hide. How cute.

  She felt as if a spotlight were shining down on her, but that had never bothered her before. It didn’t bother her now as she returned their gazes blandly, keeping her own schooled and neutral.

  The deputy executive director cleared his voice. “One final question, Agent Morris, and I think we’re done here,” he said, his beady dark eyes boring into Lena the way they had the entire time she’d sat through this debriefing when he wasn’t murmuring with his colleagues. “To your knowledge, does Jace Adams suspect, in any way whatsoever, the true part you played in having him expelled from MIT?”

  Lena Morris shook her head confidently. “No, sir.”

  “Good. That’s perfect.” He closed the file folder that had been open on the highly glossed desk in front of him throughout the meeting and gave her a single nod along with his serpentine smile. “Then everything is going according to plan.”

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  Acknowledgments

  Here’s the thing about writing books: it never gets easier! Whether it�
�s your first book or your fifteenth, the struggle might be different, but it’s no less real. I’d like to take a moment to recognize everyone who helped make this story happen.

  Thank you so much to my agent, Louise Fury. You always fight for me and give me a voice when I don’t know how to use mine. You cheer me on, talk me through, and keep me writing. In this business I’ve always felt like a lone wolf, and I rather like it that way, but I’m so glad to have you in my corner!

  Hats off to the team at Entangled who helped me whip this manuscript into shape: Liz Pelletier, Hannah Lindsey, Stacy Abrams, and Greta Gunselman. To the fantastic crew in publicity: Holly Bryant-Simpson, Jessica Turner, and Riki Cleveland, you guys are so on top of things and handle all the heavy lifting so I don’t have to. Thank you all so much.

  To my husband, Brandon, who’s always worthy of a dedication in every single book: I don’t know what I would do without you. Sometimes I think I’m an extra full-time job on top of your own, but you never complain. You take up my slack when I’m in the writing cave. You make sure things get done. And you’re always there to support me and the kids in everything we do. I love you!

  Kids, you two keep me laughing every day and, let’s be honest, you’re probably the main reason I ever leave my house. A, if I didn’t have your epic knock-knock jokes and time away from the computer to cheer you on in softball and gymnastics, I don’t know how I’d make it. D, I’m so proud of the person and writer you’ve become. I know you’re destined for great things and I can’t wait to see what you do!

  And finally, to you reading this right now. I honestly think I have the best readers in the world. There aren’t enough words for what you all have given me: the opportunity to live my dream. From the bottom of my heart, thank you, thank you, thank you! I’ll see you next time.

  Love,

  Cherrie

  About the Author

  New York Times and USA TODAY bestselling author Cherrie Lynn has been a CPS caseworker and a juvenile probation officer, but now that she has come to her senses, she writes contemporary and paranormal romance on the steamy side. It’s much more fun. She’s also an unabashed rock-music enthusiast and loves letting her passion for romance and metal collide on the page.

  When she’s not writing, you can find her reading, listening to music, or playing with her favorite gadget of the moment. She’s also fond of hitting the road with her husband to catch their favorite bands live.

  Cherrie lives in East Texas with her husband and two kids, all of whom are the source of much merriment, mischief, and mayhem. You can visit her at cherrielynn.com or at the various social networking sites. She loves hearing from readers!

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