I sighed. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Is he going to be a part of our family?”
He was asking some seriously tough questions. “I don’t know.”
He didn’t look satisfied with my answer. “I hope so. I like him.”
“So do I,” I murmured. “So do I.”
“Can we go to the jump park after this?” he asked, quickly moving on to the next thing on his mind.
I smiled. “Yep. I told you, this is your day. Our day. We’re going to spend it doing whatever you want.”
His face lit up. I was glad I had the means to be able to spoil him. When the new baby arrived, things were definitely going to be a little different. He would have to share me. That was one of my biggest fears. How could I possibly give two children all the love and care they needed all by myself? Whenever I thought about it, I got freaked out.
I dismissed the thought and focused on the present. That was what mattered. I would have dates with Jace and get in plenty of bonding time before it was time to divide my attention and time. I checked my phone, hoping to have a message from Theo, and found nothing.
I was disappointed, but I wasn’t going to let it ruin my fun.
“Ready?” I asked Jace. He nodded. “Why don’t we stop at the home store first? Give your lunch some time to digest before you go bouncing?”
He looked a little bummed but agreed. “All right.”
We walked into the store that had been transformed into a winter wonderland. The two of us stood, staring at the amazing displays with our mouths hanging open. “Oh, my goodness,” I finally managed to breathe out the words.
“I want to decorate!” Jace exclaimed.
I laughed. “After seeing this, so do I. Go grab a cart. I think we’re going to find some really great stuff in here.”
We spent an hour walking up and down every aisle, taking in the sights and deciding to put up a second tree with a beautiful under the sea theme. Jace had a ball picking out all the new decorations. I loved seeing him so happy. He gave me hope that I could absolutely do the single-mom thing if it came to that. He would make a good big brother. He would want to help, and I was going to need all I could get.
“I’m exhausted,” I said as we walked into our house.
“Me too,” Jace agreed.
I put the pizza box on the kitchen table. After the long day, there was no way I had the energy to cook dinner. I kicked off my shoes and settled in on the couch. I was beat. Once again, I thought about the energy it was going to take to chase around a toddler and Jace.
It made me tired just thinking about it. Jace came back into the living room, carrying two plates with slices of pizza. “Here, Mom,” he said, handing me one of the plates.
I nearly burst into tears at the sweet gesture. “Thank you.”
“Thank you for taking me all over today. It was a good day.”
I smiled. “It was a really good day. Thanks for hanging out with your old mom.”
“You’re not that old,” he replied.
I laughed. “I suppose not. I’m going to finish my pizza and then take a hot bath. Do you want me to put on a movie for you?”
He shook his head. “I’m going to read my book for a little bit. I’m kind of tired too.”
“We had a busy day.”
“When are we going to put up the new tree?”
I sighed. “How about in a couple of weeks?”
“We can put it in my room,” he suggested.
I thought about it. “You know what? You’re right. We don’t have to follow the rules. I’ll clear some space in there tomorrow.”
“Thanks, Mom,” he said, his smile big and bright.
It was the very thing I needed to see after a stressful few days. He made my world such a better place. I had to believe my world could only get better with two children to love.
Chapter 33
Theo
We walked around the factory, checking on every piece of equipment to avoid having any more breakdowns that could seriously interrupt production. I felt a little bad as we toured the facility. I had neglected the people that worked for me. The facility was in good shape, but I hadn’t been to Florida for over a year. I had let Sawyer do the quarterly visits.
I needed to be a better CEO. Or step away. I was leaning toward the latter, but that had been when I thought there was something else I wanted to do to fill my days. I didn’t need to spend any more time alone. I would lose all that progress I had gained working with Harper. She and I might not be a thing, but I wanted to eventually find someone that I could spend my life with.
No, I didn’t. I didn’t want to find someone. I had found Harper. She was who I wanted to spend my days and nights with.
“Theo,” Sawyer hissed my name.
I looked at him. “What?”
He had that frustrated look on his face. “He was thanking you for taking the time to come out.”
I looked at the manager and offered a smile. “It was my pleasure, truly. I’m glad everything is going to work out fine. Please don’t hesitate to call the moment something like this happens again. I’ll make sure one of us visits more often to follow up on things. You’ve just done such a good job all these years, I never feel like I have to worry about you.”
The man looked very proud of himself. “Thank you, sir. Thank you again for coming here. I love my job. Your father was very good to me, and I’m glad to see you’re keeping his memory alive. I see a lot of similarities between the two of you.”
I smiled, pretty sure it was a line of bullshit but keeping that to myself. “We should get out of your hair. I know you have a lot to get done today, and I don’t want to keep you any longer than we already have. Again, thank you for showing us around, and keep up the great work.”
Sawyer had an amused look on his face. He shook hands with the manager before turning to follow me out of the sprawling building. I wasn’t all that interested in the factories. I never had been. They were loud and chaotic in my opinion. I liked the simplicity of the lab and my office.
Sawyer’s hand clapped me on the shoulder. “Wow. That was like seeing your old man in action.”
“Stop it.”
“I’m serious. That’s exactly how he talked with his people. You just earned that man’s respect and loyalty. I don’t know if you realize, but our people have been waiting for you to really step into your father’s shoes. You just did that. I’m impressed.”
I shrugged. “I didn’t do anything special.”
“Your dad had a way of making his people feel special. He made them feel valued, like they were an integral part of the business.”
I scoffed. “Gee, I’m glad he could make complete strangers feel valued. He sure as hell couldn’t do it for his son.”
“He didn’t mean to make you feel different. I think he just didn’t know how to connect with you. Don’t hold it against him.”
“I’m holding nothing against him, but I’m not going to talk about how great of a man he was. He wasn’t a great father. That’s the man I needed. I didn’t need a man who could be a great businessman who led his company to greatness. I would have settled for an average businessman and an okay father.”
He nodded, not bothering to argue with me. It was a discussion we’d had many times. He always praised my father and insisted I have some understanding and empathy for the man, and I always demanded he look at it from my point of view. Neither of us seemed to be able to see it from both sides.
“Let’s grab some dinner,” I said. “I could really use some authentic Cuban food.”
“Sounds good to me. I’ll call the pilot and arrange for our flight back tomorrow.”
We got into the waiting car. Sawyer gave the driver instructions to take us to the best Cuban restaurant in the city. The man grinned, clearly thrilled to show off his knowledge of Miami.
I liked Miami, but I liked it better when I was about ten years younger. It all felt very loud and very bright to me now. Too
much. There was always a party, and it made me feel like I was pushing eighty instead of forty.
The driver pulled to a stop in front of a restaurant with an actual red carpet and velvet ropes running along either side. I looked at Sawyer. “Seems a bit much, don’t you think?”
He grinned. “May as well live it up while we’re here.”
I sighed. “I hope it’s not too loud.”
“You are seriously old. Come on.”
I got out of the car and noticed paparazzi hovering nearby. We were no one special. They looked disappointed when they realized it was two nobodies. I almost laughed at their expressions. The restaurant was a celebrity magnet apparently. I didn’t give two shits about seeing anyone famous. I was hungry and cranky and ready to get home and face my fate with Harper.
With the slip of a hundred-dollar bill, the host found us a table on what he said was a sold-out night. The empty tables all around the dining room told me otherwise, but I didn’t mind the emptiness. I liked it. In my frame of mind, I needed it.
“Still thinking about the Harper situation?” he asked as we both sipped on Jack and Coke.
“I can’t stop thinking about it.”
“Did you call her last night?”
“No. I thought about it, but then I figured I probably didn’t want to hear the news over the phone anyway. She made it sound pretty serious.”
“I was just kidding about her being pregnant,” he said.
I shrugged. “You made a good point.”
“I hate to say it, but the chances are more likely it is her wanting to break things off with you. I know you don’t want to hear that, and I am really sorry, but experience tells me that ‘talk’ usually leads to the end of a relationship.”
I nodded. “I know.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Nothing you did. It wasn’t serious.”
“Bullshit. It was serious. I saw how hard you fell for her.”
I shrugged. “I guess it doesn’t matter now, does it?”
“Look, if you really like this lady and you want to make a go of things, you’re going to need to put some effort into it. Send her flowers, chocolate, jewelry, whatever. Maybe she doesn’t think you want anything serious and she’s trying to dump you before you dump her.”
“That’s stupid.”
He chuckled. “It might be stupid, but it’s been the way of things long before we were ever born. If you want her, fight for her. If you let her walk away, it’s on you. Maybe she wants you to fight a little.”
I sighed. “I don’t know why it has to be so complicated. Things were just fine.”
“For you, but I know you. You’re not great at calling and checking in or being spontaneous. Your lady is kind of a firecracker. I’m thinking she might want a little zing in her life. Be zingy.”
He did have a point. I hadn’t actually done anything all that great for her. We’d gone to dinner a couple of times and spent a weekend together at a theme park. Most of it had been her idea. Her inviting me out.
“I don’t know. I’ll text—”
He stopped me with a shake of his head. “If she’s crying out for attention, the last thing you want to do is send a text. You need to have a little game. Flowers. Surprise her at work. Hell, send a singing telegram if you must, but make it big and make it special.”
“We’ll see. I’m not going to beg. I’ve been there and done that. If she doesn’t want me, then that’s fine.”
“It isn’t fine,” he said. “Don’t give up. Make a small gesture then. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you can walk away knowing you tried. There are always going to be people you can’t please.”
I nodded. “That, I can agree with. I’ll worry about it when we get back. For now, I’m going to eat and drink and pretend all is good.”
He laughed. “Good. Perfect. Let’s hit one of the nightclubs when we’re done.”
I held up a hand, finishing the drink before putting it back on the table. “No.” I signaled for another drink to be delivered. “I want to drink, but I don’t want to dance and have sweaty bodies pressed against me.”
“Spoilsport,” he pouted.
“I am saving you a great deal of embarrassment. You’re too old to be hanging out in those places.”
“You’re only as old as you feel.”
“I feel old.”
He took a drink from the fresh drinks that had been delivered. “You know,” he started, and I just knew it was going to be something stupid. That was how he always started obnoxious sentences.
“I don’t, but you’re not going to let me stop you from saying it anyway.”
“The best way to get—”
“Don’t. I’m stopping you right there. I’m not a college frat boy. I don’t get over women by sleeping with a new one. No self-respecting adult does.”
He grinned. “I do.”
“Self-respecting,” I reiterated.
He shrugged. “I respect myself fine, but I like women and sex with women, and sometimes, you just have to jump back on the horse when you’ve been bucked off.”
“I can’t even with you right now.”
He laughed. “Keep drinking. It’ll get easier to tolerate me.”
“I don’t know if they make enough liquor for that.”
We ate our dinners and drank enough alcohol to dull the senses. It didn’t make me forget about Harper. That was a wound that wouldn’t be healing anytime soon. Assuming it was a wound, which, with the more alcohol I consumed, was what I believed.
Much to Sawyer’s irritation, I declined his multiple invitations to hit the clubs. I wanted to sleep and sulk. I got into my room and pulled off my tie, kicking off my shoes and flopping in one of the chairs. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and stared at the screen that was lacking any notifications. No missed calls. No texts. Nothing.
I pulled up her name and started to write out a text. I stared at the words, the words that asked her for a chance to fix whatever it was I had broken. To be the man she needed. To be a part of her little family. I stared at the words and then hit the backspace button, holding it down until the message was lost forever.
I put the phone on the table and got up. There was no point in taking it into the bedroom. It wasn’t like I was going to get any calls. I stripped off my clothes and climbed into bed. I stared up at the dark ceiling, wondering what I would do if Harper didn’t want to see me anymore.
I needed to be able to have my response planned so I didn’t say or do something stupid. I hated being unprepared. I liked to know what was coming. It made my life easier.
I needed an action plan.
Chapter 34
Harper
I was moving slowly. I had overdone it yesterday. The morning sickness was worse than it had been all week. I felt green. My stomach was rolling. I had pulled the eggs out of the fridge but quickly put them back in. The thought of the smell of eggs made me nauseated. Eggs were not on the breakfast menu.
I scanned the pantry and decided it was fruit, toast, and some yogurt topped with granola. I didn’t have the energy to cook anything. I wasn’t going to feel guilty about it either. I carried everything to the table, making several trips and doing my best not to make any sudden movements.
“Jace, I’ve got breakfast ready,” I shouted down the hall.
He came into the dining room, putting his book on the table. “Are you okay, Mom?”
I smiled. “I’m fine. I think that pizza didn’t sit well with me.”
“I’m fine,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders.
“Because you have an iron stomach. You always have. When you were a little guy, you rarely got sick.”
“Is that a good thing?” he asked.
“It was for me,” I said. “I think we’ll stay home today if that’s okay with you. I want to get the laundry done and get the house clean. I need to go through your dresser and see what we need for winter clothes. You’ve grown, and there are quite a few pairs of pants I kn
ow you’ve outgrown. It would be a good time to go through your toys and figure out what you want to donate to the shelter as well.”
He nodded, clearly not paying attention to what I was saying. I had this need to clean and remove clutter. We had a four-bedroom home. I was going to give up my office and turn it into the nursery. The guest room would remain as is. I felt like there was a lot to do and little time to get it done.
The doorbell rang. “I’ll get it,” I said, getting up from the table.
I practically ran to the door, hoping it was Theo. I knew it was unlikely, but I wanted to see him. As worried as I was about his reaction, I really wanted to lean on him. I missed his strong arms around me. I missed the quiet strength he provided with very few words.
When I opened the door, it was Kylie. “Oh, hi,” I said, pulling it open and gesturing for her to come in.
“Gee, I feel loved.”
“Sorry, I thought you might be Theo.”
“Are you expecting him?” she asked.
“No.”
She stayed in the living room. “Did you tell him?”
“No.”
“Oh. Are you going to tell him?”
“Yes. I think. I tried.”
“You tried?”
“I asked if he wanted to go to dinner so we could talk. He said he was on his way to Florida.”
She scowled. “Is that an excuse? Because that seems like an elaborate ploy to avoid talking to you.”
“I don’t know. He said he had to go and would call when he got back.”
She nodded, looking thoughtful. “Do you think he knows?”
“How could he?”
“True. You didn’t give him any hints?”
“No.”
“Have you figured out what you’re going to say to him?”
I walked to the sofa and flopped down, my arms splayed to the side. “No. I don’t know what to say. I feel like shit today. I just want to curl up in bed and forget about everything for a while.”
“Do you want me to take Jace for a while? You can rest or just have some alone time.”
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