Prima

by Alta Hensley

  I couldn’t have spoken if my very life depended on it. All I could hear was his confessions… not of ordering those horrid acts, or even attempting to call them accidents any longer, but of having committed every one of them himself. I was at the mercy of a man who had absolutely no hesitation in taking what he wanted and removing anything, or anyone, who stood in his way.

  A cry managed to escape my closed throat when fingers dug into tender skin.

  This made no sense. Nikolai never gave information without extracting some sort of price. Though one voice inside my head screamed at me to keep silent, the other demanded I know… I had to ask. “Why… why are you telling me this?”

  He laughed again, the sound chewing into my soul like daggers. “Because evidently you are a very poor student and need some visual aids to drive the lesson home.” Digging his fingers deeper, he yanked my head back.

  “You seem to have forgotten that when I ask a question, I expect a fuckin answer,” he said, eyes devoid of anything but evil boring into mine.

  Pure terror ran through me, burning away any residual fog in my mind, allowing me to see clearly. This man had murdered Alek and Yuri’s father, and I had no doubt he’d do the same to anyone I loved.

  Vomit began to fill the back of my throat as I realized I had returned to the same position I had been in before. That I’d seemingly learned nothing over the last few years. Here I was, considering stepping back into the very hellhole I’d barely managed to crawl out of, only this time my actions wouldn’t affect just me. My choices would affect people I actually cared about, and I also had a lot more to lose. If I did this, I was sure to lose myself, but the thought of possibly losing Baba or Alek… that really was the end of the internal debate.

  “Yes… it’s clear.”

  “Good, and just in case those pictures become a bit foggy in your pretty little head and you think about spilling your guts, I suggest you remember there are more people in that theatre of yours… two frilly dancing boys who will die as easily as their daddy did.”

  “I-I won’t say anything…” I said, no longer in fear of my own life, but knowing I was now responsible for the lives of three others. “I’ve learned the error of my ways. I-I’ve missed you, Nikki.” Every word killed a bit more of my soul. Every one like a knife twisting in my belly and yet that no longer mattered. I no longer mattered. With a swing of the hammer, I pounded another nail in my coffin. “I’ll do whatever you want.”

  “Of course you will,” he said, his lips curling into a smile that had icy fingers climbing up my spine.

  “Boss?”

  “What?” Nikolai snapped as he turned his head to glare at the man guilty of interrupting him.

  “The champagne you ordered is here,” the man said, evidently used to his boss’ change of mood or else totally clueless as to what Nikolai could do. Holding up a silver bucket full of ice and a bottle of champagne in one hand, a pair of flutes in his other, he asked, “Where do you want it?”

  “Put it on the table and then get the fuck out,” Nikolai said, finally easing his hold and stepping back a foot. “Don’t interrupt me again unless the fucking hotel is on fire.”

  “You got it, boss,” the man said, giving me a sleazy leer before completing his task and leaving.

  Was it crazy that I was grateful when he pulled the door closed behind him? Considering I hadn’t left with him, perhaps it was nuts to feel gratitude, but I didn’t care. The thought that whatever was going to happen would at least happen without witnesses this time was the only good thing I had to cling to at the moment.

  Nikolai casually walked across the room and tugged the bottle from its bed of ice, grunting as he read the label. “Not bad, not Krug, but I won’t turn my nose up at my good friend Dom,” he said.

  I knew better than to roll my eyes or laugh… that lesson I’d learned fairly quickly after first meeting this man. I nodded, rubbing my throat to ease the pain of his hold.

  He worked the wire free and then popped the cork, the loud sound causing me to jump and Nikolai to laugh. “Well, go ahead,” he said as he poured the bubbly wine into one of the flutes. “Take off whatever the fuck you call what you’re wearing and get down on your knees.”

  Even knowing what was likely to happen, I seemed unable to comprehend what he was saying. I watched as he took his first sip, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed the mouthful of champagne.

  “Don’t keep me waiting, Clara. You know I don’t like to repeat myself.”

  Yes, I’d learned that lesson as well. It seemed the thing I hadn’t learned was escape was not an option. Not if I didn’t want another to pay the price for my disobedience. My hands shook as I took off my clothes. Silence accompanied each drag of fabric down my legs or up over my head until I had nothing left to remove. The only thing I wore was a cloak of shame and quite possibly his fingerprints on my neck as I watched him walk toward me, one hand lifting the glass to his lips, his other reaching to slide the zipper of his pants down. By the time he stood before me, his cock was already freed of its confinement, bobbing lewdly as he looked up and down my nude body.

  “Knees, now,” he said, fisting his cock. “Unless, of course, you’ve decided you’re not a fan of lube?”

  I thought I couldn’t feel more humiliated, but I’d thought wrong. As I slowly went to my knees, I looked behind me for the first time to see what I’d thought was a wall was actually a huge plane of glass that looked out over the waters of the lake. Turning back, I knew what he’d said on the phone was about to come true. His lips curled into a sneer as mine opened to accept his cock, my tongue instantly beginning to lick and lave, knowing I was the one to provide the lubrication he’d promised. He drank his champagne while looking out the window at the lake while my head bobbed up and down his cock until he took hold of my hair and tugged me free.

  “That’s enough,” he said, using his hold to pull me to my feet. “We wouldn’t want it to be too easy now, would we? Turn around and press those little titties against the window.”

  Even with his shaft glistening with my saliva, I knew easy wasn’t even close to what I’d be experiencing. Turning, I stepped up to the glass, closing my eyes as I pressed my body against the cold pane, my nipples pebbling with the shocking change of temperature. I didn’t think of how someone might see me, knowing it didn’t matter as no one could see me as anything worse than how I saw myself in my mind’s eye.

  I saw the woman I’d struggled to become disappear, and the woman I’d thought gone forever returning to step in to take her place. Perhaps that was for the best as I wasn’t sure the new Clara would be capable of surviving whatever happened in the next moment or the hours that would follow.

  So, when he kicked my feet apart, I simply shifted my stance. And when he upended his glass to allow the remaining icy drops of his drink to slide down my spine, I only shuddered feeling the liquid slide into the crevice of my buttocks. And when he said to reach back and spread the cheeks of my ass wide… I did.

  28

  Alek

  It didn’t take a degree in psychology to know something was off with Clara. No, not just off — something was definitely wrong.

  It wasn’t the fact she was avoiding me because she wasn’t… not in the sense that she didn’t answer the phone when I called to check on how her grandmother was faring. She answered my questions, assured me everything was fine, politely thanked me for my concern, and hung up. At the theater, she didn’t slip from a room whenever I entered. Yes, she still gave me a smile, though it never reached her eyes. She would return a wave if I called out to her from a distance, yet even that was off.

  I used to stand in the shadows and watch her move, the fluidity of each motion like water dancing over smooth river rocks. But now, watching her almost had me wincing. It was as if every movement caused her pain though she never complained nor attempted to take it easy when Yuri snapped at her to jump higher, leap farther, or simply to position her fingers differently. Watching her per
form a series of spins and then turn her back to the others and close her eyes, her brow furrowing as her fingers clenched in front of her, I had had enough.

  “Clara, I want to see you in my office before you leave,” I said, pushing off the wall and stepping out where she could easily see me. Her slight jerk affirmed she’d not been aware of my presence.

  “Oh… I can’t. I mean, I have… um, I have an appointment right after we finish rehearsal,” she said.

  It wasn’t the words that had the hairs on the back of my neck standing up. It wasn’t even the fact her fingers were twisting together and she was looking toward the wings of the stage, or toward the exits… or anywhere other than at me. The thing absolutely killing me was that she looked terrified standing on the same stage where we’d first had sex.

  “What the fuck is going on?” I asked, no longer concerned about waiting until we were in the privacy of my office.

  “Nothing’s wrong,” she said far too fast to be even slightly convincing.

  I hadn’t asked if anything was wrong, but her answer confirmed something was definitely wrong. “Bullshit,” I said, moving swiftly down the aisle toward her and trying not to cringe as she instantly moved backward. Halting, I looked up at her. “Clara, talk to me.”

  “I-I have to go,” she said, turning on her heel and running toward the wing.

  Shock had me frozen for an instant before I said, “Fuck,” and made my own move… not toward the stage, but to the place I was sure she was fleeing. By the time she pushed out the side door, I was ready and reached out and grabbed her arm. The piercing scream almost had me releasing her, but the pure panic on her face had me tightening my hold.

  “Let me go,” she demanded.

  “Not happening,” I said, pulling the door open again.

  “Please, I… I can’t be late,” she said. “I’ll… I’ll call you later, but you have to let me go.”

  Looking down at her, every alarm bell I had was pinging through my body. Something wasn’t wrong, something was bad enough to have one of the strongest women I’d ever met shaking like a leaf and looking as if she was going to either pass out, throw up, or die on the spot.

  “Clara,” I said softly, reaching out to touch her face only to watch her recoil before realizing I wasn’t going to strike her.

  My blood boiled at her reaction. There was just one thing I could think of that would have her reacting like this, and his name was Nikolai Kosloff.

  “What did that bastard do?” I demanded.

  “Who? I-I don’t know what you’re—”

  “Don’t,” I said sharply. “You can tell me to fuck off once we’re done, but not until you explain what the hell is going on.”

  Her mouth opened and closed as if she couldn’t decide what to say, what to confess or what to attempt to keep hidden.

  “And don’t even think about lying to me,” I added, stepping back inside and pulling her along beside me. I gave a glance out to the parking lot, not exactly sure what I was looking for but certain I’d recognize it if I saw it. Seeing nothing but a few dancers moving to their cars, I pulled the door closed behind us.

  “Alek, please…”

  She didn’t continue but I felt her plea course through me as my gaze tracked a single tear as it slid down her cheek, my eyes locking on what appeared at first to be a smudge of dirt on the side of her neck and yet I realized it was a bruise. A bruise that looked suspiciously like a fingerprint.

  “Ah, fuck,” I said, wrapping my arms around her and holding her close. Leaning down, I brushed a strand of hair off her cheek, gently running my fingertip over the darker spot, seeing a few fainter ones as well. “He hurt you.”

  She didn’t respond, but I knew the truth… but had to ask. “Is this… is he what you want?”

  Finally, a bit of the Clara I remembered appeared, her eyes widening and a fire flaring if only long enough for her to shake her head.

  Relieved, I nodded and pulled her closer. “Whatever it is, we’ll get through it together. I told you I’m here for you no matter what, and I meant it.” I dropped a kiss on top of her head before continuing, “But I can’t help you if you won’t let me in. I’m asking you to trust me, Clara. Let me help you.”

  “You can’t,” she said, shaking her head. “I can’t… I won’t let you…”

  “Let me what?” I asked, sure even she didn’t believe the words she was saying. “Let me in? Let me help you? Let me care about you? Let me…”

  “Be hurt,” she blurted out, slapping a hand over her mouth with the realization of what she’d said.

  The son of a bitch! He was using Clara’s caring for me as a weapon against her. “Where is he?”

  “Who?”

  “I’m not going to play this game, Clara. Not when we both know exactly whom I’m talking about. When did Nikolai show up?”

  “I can handle it,” she said.

  “I hate repeating myself, but bullshit,” I said. “That certainly hasn’t proven true even after four years of being free from him, and it’s obvious it’s not true now. It’s not that you aren’t strong or capable, Clara, it’s because no one handles a man like Nikolai unless they are like Nikolai, and, babe, you aren’t even a blip on his playing field. Hell, even I’m not capable of handling this on my own.”

  That remark finally seemed to shock her from her rejection of the truth. She stared up at me for a long, silent moment and then whispered, “Then there really is no way to be free.”

  “Oh, there’s a way,” I assured her. “I might not know exactly what that is yet, but I promise you, there is no way I’m going to send you into hell again. It might take more than even the two of us, but I swear to you, this time, the asshole will pay.”

  Clara shuddered, her eyes closing, and I momentarily regretted my choice of words but then remembered who I was about to do battle with. Taking her hand, I walked toward my office. I’d need all the information I could gather, and though I knew it would open old wounds, Clara was the best supplier of that ammo.

  Spying Yuri in the break room, I said, “Join us,” and continued down the hall. I had to give my brother credit for not instantly asking why he should. Evidently my tone or perhaps his own concern for our principal dancer had him following in our wake.

  Once inside my office, I waited until he’d entered and then closed the door. When I thumbed the lock, Yuri’s expression changed, his eyebrow lifting.

  “What the fuck is going on?” he asked.

  “That’s what we’re going to find out,” I said, nodding toward Clara. Deciding I didn’t have time to coddle my brother but knowing I desperately needed to back up my words with actions, I dropped into one of the chairs and dragged Clara onto my lap. When Yuri’s eyes narrowed, I shook my head. “Give it up. We’re together, and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it. Now, sit down and help us figure out what we need to do before all your hard work goes out the fucking window.”

  I wasn’t stupid enough to think he’d accept the fact that neither Clara nor I had listened to his warnings to keep away from each other, but was smart enough to hit him where it would hurt… his pride in his creativity in pulling a bunch of dancers together and turning them into one of the best ballet troupes in the country.

  “I’m listening,” he said, taking the chair next to me and turning his attention toward Clara.

  “Go on,” I said softly, rubbing my palm against her back. “You’re safe here.”

  A golden ponytail swung as she shook her head. “No one is really safe… not when the bratva…” She turned to look back at me.

  “I know what you mean,” I assured her. “We’re Russian, remember? Go ahead and tell your story. We’ll stop you if we have questions, all right?”

  “Okay,” she said, nodding and taking a few moments to collect her thoughts. I wasn’t unaware she glanced at the clock on the wall.

  “What time is he expecting you?” I asked.

  “A little over an hour,” she said, looking
over at Yuri. “We got out of rehearsal a bit early today.”

  An hour. Sixty minutes didn’t seem very long, but it would have to do. “Then let’s not waste time,” I said. “Tell us everything that’s happened since Nikolai Kosloff showed up in Chicago.”

  I saw Yuri’s reaction to the name. While I’d filled him in a bit, I’d not offered him the intimate specifics of Clara’s past that she’d shared with me. Evidently, I hadn’t needed to. I wasn’t the only man capable of running a Google search. Yuri might appear all tough and uncaring, but beneath that veneer was a man who cared deeply about his dancers.

  “Yes, tell us,” Yuri said as he sat forward.

  She talked for the next half hour without us interrupting her. Though she had begun speaking in short bursts, her voice hitching as she attempted to gather her thoughts or perhaps tried to smooth over the facts she didn’t want to delve too deeply into, by the time she finished, she’d become calmer. It was as if releasing the words helped remove at least a bit of the stress she’d been carrying for the past week all by herself.

  “I don’t care what happens to me, but I won’t let anything happen to Baba or Yuri, or you,” she said softly, turning to look up at me.

  “Well, I care what happens to you,” I said, “and so does Yuri.”

  “Yeah,” he said though he appeared to be lost in thought for a moment.

  Finally, he looked from Clara to the wall. I followed his gaze to see the painting of our mother, and suddenly something Clara had said exploded in my consciousness.

  “Wait, tell me again. Exactly what did Nikolai say about the man on the road,” I said and saw Yuri nodding as if he’d wondered the same thing.