I listened, but all I heard was the rustle of the branches in the gentle breeze. “Please,” I whispered. “Tell me it’s okay.”
The sun rose as I walked along the path to my house, and in the distance, where the path diverged, I could see Junho and Minseo headed up to visit. Minseo’s gaze met mine, a soft smile on his face. His eyes glittered with hope. My stomach fluttered, distracting me from the sound of heavy footsteps behind me.
“Charlotte,” someone said. Startled, I turned to see a wide-framed soldier, his brown hair shining in the rising sun—his hazel eyes more vibrant than the sky behind him. I knew this man. I pulled my dagger. “Lancelot.”
He didn’t so much as look at the dagger. “My orders are to take you alive, but that doesn’t mean conscious. The choice is yours. Come with me willingly or I’ll hurt you.”
“What does Arthur want with me? I just want to live the rest of my life in peace.”
“You have something he wants.”
“Take it.”
“It’s not something that can be given.”
I screamed, “What is it?”
He glared back, stone-faced. “That’s between you and the king.” Lance’s gaze moved beyond me. Minseo’s footsteps and heavy breathing came up behind me.
“I know you,” Minseo said with a smile. “Lance, right?”
Minseo held his hand out, but Lance slapped it away. “It’s Lancelot.”
Where was Junho? Didn’t I see him with Minseo earlier? Ah. Getting help.
Minseo stretched his hands over his head. “So, uh, where’s your girl?”
“She’s not my girl.”
Minseo nodded. “Ah, you broke up.”
Lance drew his sword. “I’m taking Charlotte.”
“Look, man, I’m sorry your girl left but—”
“Shut up.”
Minseo turned to me, his eyes calm and his demeanor as casual as ever. “Uh, I left my sword at the inn. Can I borrow your dagger?”
I winced at the absurdity; if Minseo pushed Lance any further, we would both die here. I eyed the direction where the Viran guards were sure to come charging in. Any minute now.
“He’s trying to take me alive. It’s better if I fight him,” I said, turning back to Lance.
“Stop stalling,” Lance barked, lunging at me. I leapt back, surprised by his force. What was he doing? That could have easily killed me. I swung my dagger at him. He caught my wrist and twisted. I screamed, the dagger flying out of my hand. Before I could pull my hand away, Minseo’s fist connected with Lance’s cheek and he stumbled back, stunned.
“Owed you that,” Minseo said.
Lance wiped at his cheek like he could sweep the pain off. “You I can kill.” He swung his sword down.
Minseo slid across the dirt path and scooped up the dagger just as Lance swung down with a second blow. Minseo deflected it with the dagger, but his arms shook. This was bad.
“Stop!” a voice called from behind us. The clang of moving metal filled the air as the Viran soldiers ran to us.
Lance gritted his teeth. “Why this stupid mission?” Lance’s arms slacked. As Jay Hyun and the other guards reached us, they leapt in front of Minseo while Junho handed him his missing sword.
25
Minseo
Rusty and weak. How long had it been since I’d adequately trained? Those daily drinking binges and wallowing in Vires had taken their toll on me. Granted, having a sword could have evened the odds a bit, but I wasn’t confident that I could actually take that guy.
What’s worse is Charlotte saw everything: the sucker punch and my looming defeat. If my guards hadn’t arrived, I could have lost Charlotte.
We were lucky he was alone this time. With Merlin, he would have crushed us, guards included.
Lance threw his arms out in surrender. “So what’s it going to be?” he said, glaring at me. “I get a few more guys and come kill you and your ridiculous friends?”
I took a deep breath. “Sir Lancelot, was it?”
“Lancelot.”
“So this is your knighthood quest.” I nodded to myself. “ Capture Charlotte.”
Lance sheathed his sword. “You understand why it’s essential that I take her then.”
“I understand that you’re supposed to complete a knighthood mission alone, thus why knights are superior to soldiers here in Camelot.”
Lance bristled.
“I’m not sure why your king let you take your girlfriend along, but in any case, she’s gone. Charlotte is under the protection of Vires now. You can either fight all eleven of us by yourself or get a new dream.”
“Fine,” Lance said.
“Fine, what?”
He stepped forward. “I’ll fight all eleven of you. One on one.”
I giggled. “That would be the honorable way to do it, wouldn’t it?” I smiled. “You know, my brother Young was an honorable man. That’s the kind of deal he would have made.” I tilted my face up at the sun. “Unfortunately for you, I’m not honorable. And I’m certainly not the kind of man he was.”
Lance shook and, for a moment, I wasn’t sure if he would attack me or cry. The bulky swordsman he’d been a minute prior dissolved into a teenager mid-tantrum. I breathed relief when he turned and walked off in the direction from which he came.
“Prince Minseo of Vires,” he said, looking over his shoulder. “I’ll kill you someday.”
“Later, then,” I said.
I turned to Charlotte. “Are you hurt?” She shook her head. I nodded. “He was lucky we’ve been out of practice. We’ll get him next time,” I said.
“You think he’ll be back?”
“Without a doubt.”
Charlotte turned to my men. “Thanks for coming. I’ll make everyone breakfast.”
We walked back to Charlotte’s house with the energy of a triumphant victory while a lonely soldier returned defeated to Bullhorn. I’d known that kind of defeat—I’d lived it for a long time. I should have thought about what could be born from that level of despair; I should have taken responsibility for my part in feeding the beast.
Junho, Jay Hyun, and the other soldiers entered Charlotte’s house before us, but she stopped me before I went in.
“Minseo,” she grinned, “want to see my garden?”
If that’s some kind of innuendo, yes. “Of course,” I said and she led me around the house to the back.
A large kitchen garden sat tucked away behind the house. It had rows of leafy stocks and flowers beginning to bud. It was preened, and the way Charlotte beamed told me that she’d done it herself. “These are hydrangeas. They’ll be big and blue in a month’s time.” She knelt next to a leafy row, pulled a large carrot from the soil, and handed it to me. “Lovely!” I teased, dusting the dirt from it.
“I know!” she said too loudly.
“Those are called buttercups. They’re yellow. I found them by the river and replanted them here.”
“And what did you name these?” I said, pointing to a green patch.
She rolled her eyes. “That’s lettuce. Pick one, will you?”
We picked several of her spring vegetables and carried them into the house. It was the kind of work I’d never done. I hadn’t even watched anyone do it, but I’d never imagined it could bring someone such joy. Perhaps Charlotte was happy about our defeat of Lancelot, or maybe she was happy for another reason.
The soldiers didn’t fit well in the house, but they sat cheerfully around the room as Morgana treated them like her personal toys. I laughed at how she looked ordering them about and how they listened. She was a princess of Vires through and through.
Charlotte cooked and, before long, she hummed a familiar melody that I couldn’t place.
“So you’re just going to toss them all in and boil it?”
She shrugged. “How else?”
I pulled out some bowls and plates, anything we could use to feed everyone. They were all different sizes, mostly made from wood. Many of them seemed like the
y’d never been used, or hadn’t been used in quite some time. I rinsed the usable ones, all the while Charlotte hummed.
I like to think I brought a little peace to her that day, and that there was a chance that she’d change her mind someday and return with me to Vires. But it was too soon to ask her. Still, I relished seeing her that way. Welcome back, Charlotte.
Back at my inn that night, I picked up the letter I’d been writing to Young and read over my last sentence.
I was relieved to find that she was not the dead-eyed widow I’d abandoned but a woman of grace and silent strength.
What else? How could I describe her?
She sang while she cooked and spent long stretches of time in her garden. She picked wildflowers and gazed up at the stars.
When she speaks of you, she smiles to herself then looks off into the distance, as if she’s waiting for her time to come so that she can be reunited with you in the next life. Through all the loss she suffered, she somehow became more.
Ah! And Morgana.
Your young daughter, Morgana, glitters with all the charisma and poise of royalty and all the mischievousness that you and I possessed in youth. When Charlotte’s gaze fell upon her, I saw in her eyes the glimmer of love that I’d only ever seen when she looked upon you.
But something changed. Today, I saw it when she looked at me.
Though Charlotte prefers to remain tied to the simple life she’s accustomed to—
I will try to win her love. I’ll raise Morgana as my own in Vires. We’ll be a family. I was a horrible brother and a liar. Why couldn’t I write the truth?
I will return to visit your daughter as often as time allows. And if Charlotte permits me, I’ll bring her lavish gifts and toys from Vires.
I sighed, disgusted by my lie. I’d rather die than return to Vires without them. Was this guilt? He’d asked me to take care of her. Ugh. He couldn't have meant this. Come on, Minseo, write something true.
Though she was born untitled, she’ll remain a princess in my eyes. Morgana is true joy embodied, and it seems her most treasured moments are spent telling magical tales.
Can you believe it—she has your smile.
With all my love,
Minseo
I’m a fraud. I threw my face into my arms.
“Oooooh, is this for Charlotte?” Junho said, pulling the letter from under me. I grabbed for it, but he spun. The smile and dimples dimmed from his face. I clenched my jaw. I hadn’t heard him come in. “After all this, you plan to leave her?”
“Of course not.”
His gaze was sharp. “Is it because of Sumin? Because he’s sick? There’s nothing you can do to help him.”
“That’s not it,” I assured him. I felt lucky to have a friend who cared, a friend who wanted what was best for me.
“Then what’s this, Minseo?” he asked, shaking the parchment in the air.
I dropped my head. “He’d never understand. If the roles were reversed, I’d never forgive him.” I didn’t need to explain which he I meant.
Junho sighed. “Have you considered, perhaps, that he was a better man than you?”
I laughed, wiping the wet from my eyes. “Every day of my life.”
26
Lancelot
I spent years searching for Charlotte, and this was the second time I had to walk away without her. Would I die a nameless soldier? My sole purpose had been to become one of Arthur’s knights. Rich enough to marry whomever I chose, respected at Arthur’s right hand—but what was it all for? Arthur had taken the only thing I’d ever wanted, reduced my life to stolen moments and secrecy. I’d be nothing but his pawn. He was no brother of mine, was he?
The bell tower at the Wellwood city center struck noon. They’d be getting married right about now. My face burned. Did he even love her?
My mind flashed to the night I’d spent with Gwen—the blush of her cheeks, the clasp of her fingers.
I hoped he loved her because somehow I’d capture Charlotte, I’d become a knight, and whenever his back was turned, I’d have his wife.
The problem was Charlotte was untouchable. How was I supposed to capture her when she had ten Viran guards around at all times? Arthur wouldn’t grant me a single one of Camelot’s soldiers for this mission. He’d even refused to let Merlin accompany me until she’d begged, and even she’d abandoned me.
What was her problem anyway? Regardless of how she felt about me, I never misled her. I was always going to return back to Gwenevere. The least she could have done was see the mission through to the end. Years of partnership tossed aside in an instant, for a crush. I’d never admit it to her, but I needed her more than ever. Her power, sure. But more than that, I was hurt and alone. Isn’t this when friends or family are supposed to step in and lift me? But it had never been that way, had it? No. When I found a way to be knighted and made something of myself, they’d all come, basking in my success like they’d guided it.
I recalled the icy glare Merlin gave me when I last saw her. No, enlisting her help wasn’t an option even if I did swallow my pride enough to apologize.
Which left Arthur. I’d have to convince him to allow me some assistance—appeal to the part of him that might still consider us brothers. Yes, I’d ask for his help in order to ultimately betray him. Just like he’d done to me after I basically handed him the throne on a silver platter. It had agreeable symmetry. With a haphazard plan in place, I felt reinvigorated. I didn’t need foolproof, I needed possible.
I spent my trip home in reflection. So much of my time I’d been searching, but I wasn’t sure that I’d been looking for Charlotte. I wanted what everyone did: strength, sense of self, and a place to belong. Had I purposely delayed my return? These lackluster searches and drawn-out training sessions—did I really need to train to catch some girl? Every path I forged in my mind led me to the same conclusion. I hadn’t been before, but now I was ready. Ready to be a knight, ready to give myself the title, and that was worth more than what Arthur could bestow.
I returned to Bullhorn not as a disgraced failure but as a man ready to embrace my new path. I strode proudly into the castle, let my gaze linger too long on Gwenevere in broad daylight, and demanded an audience with Arthur.
Based on the number of guards and the caliber of the knights that attended our meeting, Arthur understood how dangerous he’d made me. Knighted with a title, I’d be all the more deadly. But I wasn’t there for his life. I was there for his help.
He paced. “Vires, you say?”
“Yes, sir. Ten of them. I’d need half as many to defeat them. Please bend your conditions and allow me to—”
“What an interesting opportunity,” he said. “Perhaps this is the perfect moment to use my ace and expand Camelot’s reach.”
“Sir?”
“Jeremy, do you trust me?”
Not as far as I can throw you. “Yes, Your Majesty.”
“Permit me a few weeks. Stay in Bullhorn and I’ll see to it that your next meeting with Charlotte will result in your knighthood.”
“Thank you, sir,” I said as I turned to exit.
“Will you be joining me for dinner?” he asked, his voice returning to that of a teenage boy.
I shook my head. “I’m tired.”
He sighed. “Gwen as well. Perhaps Merlin will join me?”
I turned away before the smile cut into my face.
27
Minseo
A knock sounded on my door, and before I could open it, it flew open and Morgana ran in. “Minnoooooow!” she yelled. It had been over a week since a slip of the tongue had given birth to this heinous nickname, and I still wasn’t used to it. She leapt onto my bed and jumped herself out of breath. Gabriel peeked in. “Hey, man, do you have a minute?”
“Sure, come in,” I said.
He rubbed his hands together. “So, Morgana has never spent a single night at this inn. Did you know that?” His voice was exclamatory.
I mirrored it. “Is that so? And does
my little princess want to stay here with me?” I reached for her and she jumped into my arms, wrapping her little legs around me, a large heap of her curls bouncing into my mouth and up my nose. I shook them away.
“Actually,” Gabriel said, his voice flattening, “I was thinking maybe we could…” He shook his head. “Trade?”
I blinked blankly back at him.
“Morgana and I will take this room and you can stay in my room.”
“Your room?” I gulped. “You mean with Charlotte?”
His eyes darted to Morgana. “It’ll be like a game.”
“Game!” Morgana shouted.
“Ah,” I said, biting back a smile. “And, um, does Charlotte know about this game?”
Gabriel’s eyes shifted. “We thought you could surprise her.”
I exhaled a stomach full of nerves. “We meaning you and Junho.”
Morgana squealed. “And me.”
I tickled her. “And you, of course.”
I nodded, a calm exterior hiding the hurricane of chaos inside. It was too soon. Things had been going so well. The last few weeks were a dream. Charlotte and I spent every second together that we could, and I could feel it changing. We’d never gotten close again, not like that night by the pond, but we started talking again, the way we used to.
The day Charlotte, Morgana, and I spent by the river, she’d laughed so hard she cried. And a few days later, when she dared speak of the past, her eyes sparkled at the realization that even for a short time, I knew her father, her mother, her friend, the cook, Leon, many council members, and mutual acquaintances. I’d known her, before all the loss, and suddenly the happy memories she’d shut out with the bad ones were there for us to enjoy together. But I still couldn’t bring myself to mention Sumin—or my father’s order to come home, the one I disobeyed with every passing day.
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