Mystery at the Hedge Fund

by Eleanor Kittering

“You know, as strange as all this is to me, somehow I understand you. Don't ask me why, but I understand you.” Lana said.

  “Maybe you're smarter than you know Lana.” Roger said smiling. “Well, one thing is for certain, Michael's death had to make somebody's life easier. But who? I have to get into that office when nobody was around. I have to check where the body was found and look for some clues. Fred mentioned something the coroner said and I want to look into that.” Roger continued.

  In the middle of all this, Mandy came over and started talking to the cats.

  “Well you two seem to be talking a lot these days. Ok Lana, I promised you we were going to go to the park, so let's go for a while. I don't want you to think I've forgotten about you.”

  She was holding the leashes for both of them.

  “It looks like we're going to the park!” Lana said excitedly.

  “Yes, Mandy is going to make good on the promise to take you to the park so you don't feel like the red headed step child.” Roger said.

  “What's a red headed step child?” Lana asked.

  “That's one of those human expression, referring to someone is neglected, treated poorly, doesn't fit in or is not part of the family.”

  “That has definitely been my experience this morning.” Lana said still a little hurt.

  “Well, we didn't do it to you on purpose. It's just hard to conduct business with two cats. Never mind that, It's hard to conduct business with one cat. But Mandy is still worried that getting hit by the truck hurt my brain and she wants to keep an eye on me. And now you're aware I'm not really a cat.” Roger said.

  “I keep forgetting, it's so hard for me not to think of you as a cat.” Lana said.

  “Well, I hope you don't hold it against me.” Roger said jokingly.

  “Oh no, I would never, I mean, since I met you I don't want to be with anyone else…” Lana trailed off, trying not to make Roger feel bad and realizing she was saying things she felt but was trying to keep hidden.

  “It's ok Lana, I'm only kidding.” Roger assured her. “Actually, the part of me that's still a cat is looking forward to going to the park. If I was a man, I'd be spending hours and hours trying to solve this murder.”

  While both were talking Mandy was putting the leashes on both of them and walking them to the car. She thought of how talkative Roger was with that weird meow of his. And it seemed Lana was talking back. She was still worried about Roger. She didn't know what happened to him.

  As she drove to the park, she thought back to discussing with Fred the possibility of trying to get more investment advice and learning more about Cathy and Tim. She figured once she got to the park, she would call Fred. Since he had asked for her help in this investigation, she didn't think he would object to her plan. And she truly still wanted to learn how to invest her money, whether it was with these people or someone else. In the course of these thoughts, she arrived at the park.

  “Ok you two, we're finally here.” Mandy said and got out of the car to let the cats out.

  Lana and Roger ran over to the grass and just rolled around.

  “Oh, this feels so great!” Lana said, happy to be rolling around on the grass.

  “Yes, I actually find this fun. It's probably this cat/man combo that's keeping me sane. I still enjoy cat like things, but think like a man. This is definitely one for the books, but there's no one to write it into the books.” Roger said.

  Lana was busy running off to another part of the park “C'mon Roger, see if you can catch me.”

  Roger shook his head and laughed “I'll be right with you. You gotta move faster than that.”

  Once Mandy saw the cats were in their element, she called Fred.

  “Hi Mandy.” Fred answered.

  “Hi Fred, listen I have an idea for further investigation.” Mandy said. In his head, Fred upon hearing this wondered if Mandy was coming up with something dangerous.

  “What is this idea of yours?” Fred asked warily.

  “Well, it's possible Cathy and Tim are holding on to some knowledge as to why Michael died in the office. So I thought of going back to the hedge fund as though I'm still interested in investing my money and what opportunities are there, now that Michael is gone. In the midst of these explorations, I'll ask questions as to how it was working with Michael, easy questions that might shed some light as to how his co-workers viewed him. Maybe somebody has a grudge.” Mandy replied

  “Well, I guess as long as you do it during business hours as a regular customer, it will probably be alright. Don't meet with these people after hours, particularly if they suggest it. They may have other motives for not speaking to you at the office which may be tied to Michael's death.” Fred suggested.

  “I completely understand, I definitely do not want to wind up as another statistic. No, just go there during business hours and see what someone may say in regular conversation.” Mandy said.

  “I'm going to visit Michael's old boss tomorrow. If anybody has a chip on their shoulder regarding Michael it's this guy Chester. I tried setting up an interview and the ego that was coming out of my phone resembled a clogged toilet, no matter how many times I tried to flush him down, he just kept bubbling over.” Fred said.

  “He sounds like a real charmer. I'm glad you're talking to him and it's not me.” Mandy said.

  “Listen I appreciate you helping me in this investigation, but I'll handle the troubled children, you just talk to the normal people like you've been doing.” Fred said.

  “Sounds good to me, I definitely do not want troubled children. And you ask yourself, how does a guy like him stay in business? From everything I've heard he's caustic and delusional, and yet he manages to stay in business.” Mandy said.

  “There's a lot of coarse people in the back end of the investment business. It's such a dog eat dog, back stabbing business that you have to be somewhat unbalanced to go into the business in the first place. Some people say it's the siren song of making money that lures them in, but really, it's a culture, and if you can fit into that culture or want to be in that culture, then you can survive. Not everybody can put up with that lifestyle.”

  “And these are the people in charge of the world's finances. No wonder the economy is such a mess.” Mandy said.

  “There might be some truth to that. Not everybody in the investment world is like that, but this guy definitely is.” Fred said.

  “Well, I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow, if I can get in to see them tomorrow.” Mandy said.

  “You do that.” Fred said.

  Chapter Ten

  As Lana and Roger frolicked in the park, Roger stayed close to Mandy and took note of the phone call between Mandy and Fred. He told himself that tonight would be a good night to visit the investment firm. It wasn't that far from the house. He had made a mental plan of what to do when he got to the hedge fund. But he didn't know how to infiltrate the hedge fund. For this he was going to need Colin's help. It had been a while since he last saw Colin. Roger thought maybe he felt bad cause he still didn't have an answer for Roger. Still, investigating this murder, kept Roger's mind off thinking of his immediate problem, that he was still a man stuck in a cat's body. Luckily for him, there was still enough of the cat mind to make life bearable.

  “You've been awfully quiet. Don't you want to run around the park?” Lana told Roger.

  “Well, I'm thinking of visiting the investment firm tonight.” Roger said.

  “Really, can I come?” Lana asked excitedly.

  “Sure, let's go over there where Mandy won't hear us and she'll think we're playing. She won't start wondering why I'm meowing so much.” Roger said.

  “But, how are you going to get in.” Lana asked.

  “I'm going to get Colin to help us.” Roger said.

  “Are you sure he will?” Lana asked.

  “It's either that or I'll drive him nuts asking him when am I going to become a man again or what's happening with the cat project.” Roger said.

  “
How are you going to get in contact with him?” Lana asked.

  “Usually, I start calling out for him. Colin.. Oh Colin.. Where are you Colin? Colin, are you there?”

  After a minute or so of invocations, Colin appeared.

  “Yes Roger, I am here.”

  “Ah Colin, so nice to see you. Haven't seen you in a while.” Roger said.

  “Well, I still don't really have a solution, and I didn't want to get your hopes up if I returned prematurely.” Colin said.

  “That's very considerate of you Colin. You remember when you said I should try to read the paper and try to get up to speed as to what's happening these days?”

  “Yes, I remember that. Have you been keeping up with the news?” Colin asked.

  “Well, yes and no. Yes, I've been keeping up with the news that around me. And it turns out that Mandy is involved in another murder.”

  “Why do I feel that this is leading to some kind of trouble?” Colin said.

  “Colin, Colin don't be such a pessimist. It's just that as a detective, this is right up my alley. I've been privy to some of the preliminary investigations and from what I've seen thus far, these people might be missing a couple of pieces that I could find and will fit into the puzzle.” Roger said.

  “And what are you thinking of doing?” Colin asked.

  “Well, in order for me to test out my theory, I need to get into the investment firm at night, when nobody is there. And I need your help in breaking into this place.” Roger said.

  “Mhmmm” Colin said thoughtfully.

  “Look Colin you yourself said that I should do something to keep my mind occupied. Notice that I'm not nagging you as to when I'm becoming a man or am I going back to being a cat. I'm sure that you're working on that problem. Meanwhile, involving myself in this activity keeps me sane. And besides, how much trouble can two cats get into in a building?”

  “With you as one of the cats, civilization as we know it may cease to exist.” Colin said dryly, smiling at Roger.

  “You know Colin, you're a real comedian. You should sign up for the Major Edward Bowes show, you'll be a real hit.” Roger said sarcastically.

  “There is no Major Edward Bowes show any longer Roger, sad to say.” Colin reminded Roger.

  “Oh yes, of course, it's seventy years in the future. What do they have these days?” Roger asked.

  “America's Got Talent.” Colin replied.

  “Sign up for that.” Roger continued.

  “They won't be able to see me.” Colin replied.

  “Well, there's your gimmick right there. You're a comedian nobody can see. Everybody needs a gimmick in show business, right?” Roger said.

  Colin shook his head and rolled his eyes. He asked Roger.

  “You mentioned two cats, are you taking Lana with you?”

  “Yes. Lana here is beginning to get a complex that she's not wanted. I figured there's no harm in her coming along. In a worst-case scenario if we are caught, what are they going to do? Arrest two cats for breaking and entering? Charge us with implied larceny? I don't think so. They'll just wonder how two cats got into the place. They'll laugh it off, Mandy will think I really flipped my lid.” Roger said.

  Colin stood there thoughtfully for a minute.

  “Well, the place is not far, and I'm sure I can find a way to get you in.” Colin said.

  “You're a good man Colin, no matter what I may say about you now and then.” Roger said.

  “Well, I'm not really a man, I'm your guardian angel.” Colin replied.

  “You know what I mean. I appreciate it Colin. I figured the best time to go is tonight, after Mandy goes to sleep. That way she won't miss us not being around.” Roger explained.

  “Yes, the cover of darkness will be your best ally, both coming and going.” Colin said.

  “You always put these things so poetically. And it was in English too.” Roger teased Colin.

  “I have an extensive command of the English language Roger, that's all. And I always speak English, you just don't understand me sometimes.” Colin explained.

  “Be that as it may, I think going tonight while the location of the murder is still fresh will work in our favor. Roger said.

  “I will help you in your endeavor Roger.” Colin said.

  “See what I mean Lana?”

  All this while, Lana had been sitting on the grass watching this exchange going back and forth.

  “Colin just has a good vocabulary.” Lana observed.

  “Thank you Lana.” Colin said.

  “Well, when he starts going off the deep end, I can't understand him.” Roger said.

  “Don't worry Roger, I'll always try to make myself understood.” Colin replied.

  Mandy had been watching her cats from the distance. To look at them, you would think they were having a conversation she thought. Roger was doing most of the talking and Lana was lying on the grass. This behavior was so strange for Roger, she said to herself. She wondered if this was the new normal. It's as though being hit by the truck gave her a new cat. One that seemed more aware and more communicative. He sure meowed a lot more. She kept hoping that in time, he would go back to being the same old Roger. She wondered if they were going to continue sitting there.

  “Hey aren't you two going to run in the park? Are you tired already?” She yelled out to them. Roger heard Mandy.

  “Looks like Mandy is wondering what we're doing here sitting around. We better make believe we're cats so she doesn't think we're going weird on her again.” Roger said.

  “Hey, I'm a cat, I don't have to make believe.” Lana said.

  “You're right. On the other hand, I have to make believe.” Roger said.

  “Colin, you'll back later tonight?”

  “I'll be there Roger. We'll get into the investment firm.” Colin said.

  “Good to hear, we'll see you then.” Roger said.

  Roger and Lana ran off to meet Mandy, like a couple of happy-go-lucky cats.

  “Ah, there are my babies.” Mandy said.

  “Yep, here we are.” Roger replied. All Mandy heard was a short strange meow.

  “Now, don't hang around me, go ahead, have fun and run around.” Mandy said.

  “That's our cue to run and go in a different direction.” Roger said to Lana.

  “Ok, try to catch me.” Lana said.

  “I'll give you a head start, I don't want to take advantage of a cat.” Roger said.

  “Advantage of a cat? You'll never catch me now.” Lana said, and she ran faster and further away. As Roger started to run after her, he realized he had underestimated her speed. Lana could run pretty fast. It was becoming work for him to try to catch her.

  “Either I'm getting older, or you've been practicing running.” Roger yelled out after her.

  “Nonsense, you're just getting old.” Lana said laughingly.

  “Great, I'm surrounded by smart alecks. First Colin, now you.” Roger yelled from a distance.

  Lana laughed and kept running. And so, they spent the rest of the afternoon running up and down the park, chasing birds, and finding new nooks and crannies in the park. At one point, Mandy yelled out:

  “Ok you two, it's time to go home.” Mandy said.

  As Roger heard these words, he was actually disappointed.

  “I think Mandy is trying to shepherd us to bring us back home. I'm beat, how about you??” Roger asked.

  “I'm doing fine, I love coming out to the park and running. It clears out my mind and gives me much needed exercise. Most of the time, we just sit around at the house whenever we're inside.” Lana said.

  “Yeah, now that I have this human awareness, the park is a welcome change from being indoors. Although I will say, Mandy does take us wherever she goes, so that's a plus.”

  When Roger and Lana finally got to where Mandy was standing, she put the leashes on both of them, and then walked to the car.

  “Well, you two seemed to be having fun today.” Mandy said to them both.

&
nbsp; “Yes, we like the park.” Roger said. All Mandy could hear was a weird meow.

  “Are you talking to me Roger?” Mandy wondered if Roger was actually responding to her statement. Upon hearing this, Roger remembered that he's not supposed to understand Mandy and stayed silent. “Well, maybe it's just a coincidence.” Mandy shrugged it off as possibly Roger generally meowing, while Roger noticed that Mandy didn't make too much of it.

  The drive back to the house didn't take long, and before they knew it Roger and Lana were back in the kitchen, mostly drinking water since they had built up a thirst from running around so much.

  “I don't know about you, but I'm parched. Running after you definitely builds up a thirst.” Roger said, while lapping up water.

  “Yes, I got very thirsty too.” Lana replied.

  Mandy saw that they had both emptied their water bowls and proceeded to replenish them.

  “You two are either dehydrated, or you want me to change the water.” She said playing with them,.

  Roger wanted to say “You try running around a park all afternoon and see how thirsty you get.” But he didn't because he knew then Mandy would get upset thinking that he has Tourette's syndrome or whatever it is that they call it.

  Chapter Eleven

  The night was pretty uneventful with Mandy watching a movie on a service called the Lifetime Channel. Roger wondered if they had a lifetime worth of movies on that channel. He said to himself, one thing is for sure, people certainly have modern conveniences that didn't exist in his day. Like the giant tv that Mandy had. Eventually Mandy went to bed, which was what Roger was waiting for so that they could escape the house.

  After a half hour of Roger making sure that Mandy had fallen asleep, Roger started to call Colin. Colin had already sensed that Mandy was asleep and stood behind Roger, but didn't tell him he had arrived. Roger continued calling out until Colin cleared his throat. Roger turned around slightly startled.

  “How long have you been standing behind me?” Roger asked.

  “About five minutes.” Colin replied smiling.

  “Oh, you're hilarious. I tell you, you'd be an absolute knockout on that show, what you call it? Talent for America?” Roger said.