The Hamam Diaries Continued

by Sebastian J Stone

  December 23, 2009:

  I was sitting in the park on my usual stone writing when the boy I saw running down the mountain side asked to borrow a pen. He has grown a beard and cut his hair, he needed the pen to write a telephone number of a client. He recognized me and returned. He is wonderful, so animated and full of life; his lack of English is no barrier to his flow of questions and information. He is Kurdish from Iraq, not Syria, 28 and he has been in Europe for ten years, except for a brief spell in the Iraqi army. He has tried to get into England on many occasions. He told me, “because Kurds do not have a country, I am technically stateless and nobody wants me.”

  He has tried to get into Italy and once spent a year working in Switzerland, but he is always returned to Greece by the authorities. I gave him all my change, probably about ten euros.

  December 24, 2009:

  I met Sarris briefly; he was waiting for his boyfriend. They are planning to go to Norway together. After a brief conversation, I realized that his boyfriend is Nice Niko; I am both jealous and happy for them. I saw the film ‘Avatar’ unbelievable but not recommended for people prone to headaches.

  December 31, 2009:

  Today the Kurdish boy came to the park. He waved to me so I called him over and gave him my change. I should have checked first, it was rather a lot but life must be difficult. All his clients will be at home with their wives and children for the New Year celebration. He returned in the afternoon and asked ‘You gay?’ ‘Yes’ ‘Oh good, you live alone?’ ‘Yes’ ‘Good, come on, let’s go your house.’

  He talked all the way home. We had a coffee and his flow of conversation was endless and charming. Uninvited he then went into the main room where I sleep, took off all his cloths and lay on my tiger blanket. I was surprised that he had not the slightest embarrassment about being totally naked. I sat on the bed and he put his hands behind his head and spread his legs quite wide. I was happy to just look at him because he is so delicately beautiful and covered in the finest silky black hair. I caressed his whole body and told him to relax. He closed his eyes and left me to explore the perfection of his form to my satisfaction. His dick is big, his circumcision tight and perfect, with no scar. His balls are small and completely shaved. I caressed his stomach with my face but it tickled him too much and he couldn’t stand it, so I stopped and looked at his dick. It slowly filled and stretched into an impressive long thin erection. I tested the length with my hand and then reached for the measuring tape. ‘Is it big?’ he asked, ‘Oh yes, seventeen and half centimeters’--- ‘is that big?’--- ‘Yes, fourteen centimeters is normal and it’s a very nice dick.’--- ‘You have condom?’

  I sucked his dick but he asked me to stop and he put the condom on. I kneeled over him and sat on his dick but he was not happy and one spot of my semen touched his stomach causing a degree of panic. He likes to fuck in the usual position, I was not allowed to touch his ass to control angel or speed and he soon came. I pulled the condom off and he was in a state of panic, demanding water. I gave him a towel and using a bottle of water he washed his dick immediately. I kneeled behind him to appreciate the line and perfection of his form. He said, ‘You checking my ass Sebastian’--- ‘Yep’. After his very easy orgasm he had remained lying on top of me for some moments and then he gave me a little kiss on my back before standing up. He is very clean, I handed him, his trainers and with embarrassment he said, ‘They Chinese Sebastian, they smell bad.’ Was he negotiating friendship for new trainers? Once dressed, he was ready to leave and I gave him twenty euros, ‘For bus fare’ adding, ‘I will buy you some trainers’. He kissed me on the cheek, touched his heart and was gone. A nice hour, an indifferent fuck, he looks, sounds and behaves like 18, not 28, bright, amusing, grateful and so beautiful for such a nice and funny looking boy. He told me to call him, I said ‘No, if you are in the town and want to see me, come and find me.’

  January 5, 2010:

  My new friend came to see me. I feel depressed but I don’t understand why. He was very nice in bed, affectionate and he quite likes me to make love with him but he is too easily tickled and I must not touch his ass. I mentioned the trainers and he was very worried about the cost. ‘Don’t worry; the sales will be starting any day now.’ I gave him some money but I made it clear that I don’t pay for sex. He likes to kiss and cuddle a bit, but he prefers to fuck. His dick is getting very hard and it’s not so comfortable. He does not seem to understand about positions or angel. It is like being poked and prodded with the stick. He tells me that he is looking for work and he does not like selling sex. It is interesting that some people like to pay for sex but I must convince myself that I am helping a friend.

  January 10, 2010:

  Today I took Nashwan to the Hamam. He was not happy being naked and refused a massage but gave me a brief scrub. He was a source of great interest to all the resident gays. Stavros has seen him at the sandy beach and Nashwan was very abusive to him. A handsome Frenchman came into the Hamam and I offered him a brief massage. He is on his way to Syria by bicycle, he enjoyed the massage and seemed open to an uncomplicated sexual venture. Now that my job is over I have more understanding of the situations that I use to find myself in and the possibilities of sex. Had we been alone, I sensed a degree of mutual need for contact, something sexual but unspecified.

  Once home Nashwan was very eager for sex even love, he asked me for twenty-five euros because he owes money. I gave him thirty and he promised to return and stay the night. He also promised to suck my dick. He seems to be amazed and grateful that he has my friendship with no demands of any sort. He reminded me of the first time we met at the sandy beach when I gave him all my change. He ran to his Greek friend and showed him the 70 cents and said ‘look, he thinks I am begging.’

  Nashwan returned very drunk and very amenable and loving. He wanted thirty euros. He put his arms round me giggling and let me feel his ass and he started feeling my dick. His body had become soft and compliant. Turning around he put his ass against my dick holding me tight. I held him close by his shoulders and then putting one hand on his loins I held his soft round ass firmly against my dick. He turned around and kissed me on the lips and face with little pecks. He held me close pulling my face down to his so he could press his cheek against mine and his whole body yielded, molding to mine. He whispered, ‘you want to fuck my ass Sebastian.’ He left with his thirty euros for a party or something. He drinks beer and he was drunk. I have a macho boyfriend with a dick like a pole, who turns into a giggling girl and presses his soft ass against my erect dick after only a few beers.

  Nashwan’s father is one of the missing thousands in Iraq. He is a Sunni Muslim who likes Europe, democracy and freedom. He is very religious but not so devout that it interferes with his drinking or sex. He seems disappointed that I am not a practicing Christian. I told him that God is everywhere and in the human heart. He accepted this gladly. He once returned to Iraq and joined the army but his friend was shot at his side. So, he changed his mind and left. Nashwan is bright, sensitive, has a sense of humor and is also caring and funny. I find him more to my taste and sensibilities than the equivalent boys from Europe or Greece. He has a natural dignity, a natural compassion, is intuitive, sensitive and proud. He is a loving person who likes sex.

  January 12, 2010:

  We made another visit to the Hamam, after an hour we were alone and all his inhibitions vanished. He stood in front of me doing a little dance to make his dick jiggle. He filled two basins and went back and forth like a child, pouring vast quantities of water over himself. He always waits for my awareness before pushing his underpants down, as if presenting me with a little gift. I find such youthful innocence very attractive but strange in somebody from a country like Iraq. He has known violence and poverty, has had no choice but to sell sex and has traveled in Europe illegally for ten years. This suggests that innocence is a state of mind not a fact of life.

  Savas once told me that Nashwan had propositioned him for thirty euros. Savas also t
old me of a recent experience in the park. A tall very handsome Greek boy noticed that Savas was interested and dropped his dick out. Savas asked, “What do you want?” and the boy replied, “Give me a blowjob.” The boy then led the way behind a bush and dropped his trousers down to his knees. He was obviously a sportsman in prime condition. Savas sucked his well washed dick but noticed a slight smell of shit. The boy then asked, “Lick my ass.” Savas replied, “No, but I will insert one finger.” and the boy pushed hard on Sava’s finger and after some very satisfactory sex had an intense orgasm. Savas told me, that boy, because of his sensitivity and responses, was worth two hundred others, his whole body responded to everything. Savas maintained him on a high level of sexual excitement until choosing to bring him to his climax. Once over Savas stuck his finger under the boy’s nose and the boy recoiled in disgust and Savas said “It’s yours.”

  January 13, 2010:

  Nashwan stayed the night; he shares a room with four boys from Syria. He sleeps on the floor and has only one blanket. I want him to stay with me but I am intolerant of other people. He is a very sexy boy but I don’t sense any love. His dick is too long and too hard but not thick enough. He talks of getting my dick stiff for me but so far he has not shown the slightest interest. He might stand more chance of finding work here, but I am reluctant to risk commitment. So, I will leave the matter to chance and circumstance.

  January 14, 2010:

  My new friend arrived today very drunk and sexy. He talked about his money problems and insisted on getting my dick out and sucking it. He told me that he has a Greek lover who refuses to pay him so he has stopped fucking him. He kept putting his hand on my ass and kissing me. I gave him 20 euros and he asked for 10 more. I explained that my total income is thirty euros a day and I must live on that. I also explained that I will give him a home and share what I have, but I cannot give him money as well. I suspect that he values money more than me or a home. When he sucked my dick, it was obvious that he liked having a dick in his mouth but he also had to keep spitting on the floor. He has many taboo and fears especially for a rent boy.

  Nashwan is gay behind his macho front, or is he just one more asexual rent boy? I thought to check my stack of Viagra in case he wants a dick. The whole stock has gone missing. It is five years old anyway but the question is who steals people’s old Viagra. It can only be Pauline or the Paki rent boy. Is nothing sacred?

  January 16, 2010:

  Nashwan has got problems with his flat mates. They have accused him of being gay because his Greek lover left him a bag of oranges. Nashwan telephoned me before arriving with his bags and the oranges. The arrangement is that he will find work, pay his debts off and then find his own room.

  January 17, 2010:

  We did not have sex; Nashwan doesn’t like being touched. He told me that his whole life is contained in his two bags. His documents are very carefully organized. He told me about hiding in Lorries for days without food or water, hoping to get into Italy. He also told me that after the army in Iraq he returned to Europe at some point, nailed under the floor of a boat. That cost him six thousand euros. He showed me a photograph of himself in the army. The bullets across his chest looked too heavy for his slight body and he gave me the carabineer that he stole off his dead friend. He said, “My friends Kalashnikov hung from this.” He told me that a few nights ago he was so drunk he was taken to hospital. He also showed me his collection of porn on his mobile, all women but as he said, “Only up the ass Sebastian.” Listening to Nashwan I get the feeling that all inhibitions in Islam are social not sexual. It seems that sex with men is acceptable for convenience or money but must never be acknowledged; also, as in southern Europe, men can only confess to being active. If a man confesses to liking a dick up his ass he is despised as being a woman.

  Nashwan went to a bar where he saw some gay men and complained to the owner vowing never to return. The owner of the bar once destroyed a friendship between me and a nice straight Scottish boy, who liked me. If she sees me with Nashwan she will be confused, or perhaps not, Nashwan looks exactly what he is. We sleep in the same bed, but I must to stay on my side. It is interesting that he can be a sexy rent boy for money but not for a home or friendship and he refuses to drink in bars frequented by gays.

  January 18, 2010:

  Savas was telling me that Crete is the best island to live on and that Cretan men are the best, they are unusually beautiful, muscular and very macho. They talk in very big voices while pressing their knees against one under the table and of all Greek men they are the best at kissing and gay love. I am finding no discernible pattern or logic to homosexuality or gay men and their activities. Savas also told me that one Cretan man who is expert at fucking animals claims that pig’s asses are the best.

  January 19, 2010:

  I like Nashwan staying at my home but he has problems with food and his idea of sex is having me suck his dick while he watches porn on his mobile of women being fucked up the ass. He finds the pussy disgusting and not sexually arousing. He would prefer a complete circumcision. I love my little friend while at the same time I am planning to get rid of him. I am enchanted by his beauty but he drinks too much beer and he is trying to exercise his power by testing my limits. There is a strange but subtle battle for supremacy; because he has the dick and feels that he has the right to dictate how the house should be run. He insists on wearing a condom to get his dick sucked. I am relieved and I admire his resolve, but if I want to suck a plastic dick I have one in the draw that vibrates. I like him in my bed, he never moves and breaths silently but he is complaining that the soft mattress is damaging his back and he wants to sleep on the floor. I will make him a little role-up bed.

  Nashwan has shown me a video on his mobile of a group of young Iraqi men throwing a donkey off a bridge into a river. The boys and Nashwan find it unusually funny and become engulfed by uncontrollable spasms of laughter. There is no concept of panic, fear, dislocation or drowning. It was a modern bridge and very high. The more I know about people the more I like snakes, to misquote somebody.

  The word ‘donkey’ comes into Nashwan’s conversation continually. It signifies stupidity. He refers to himself as a ‘Donkey Malaka’ every time he makes a mistake or gets drunk. The symbolic fate of the donkey is interesting; it seems to be a symbolic act of purging submission and stupidity. I suppose it is in the same category as throwing goats of towers in Spain or getting the fattest man to ride a donkey to exhaustion before the village beat it to death with sticks. This is a Christian phenomenon for the expulsion of sin and the origin of the phrase and concept of ‘scape goat’. I am beginning to think that hypocrisy is common to all religions and from my observations in Greece they all degenerate into superstition.

  January 21, 2010:

  Today is a clear typical January day with no wind. This is the period known as Halcion days. I am, as always sitting on my stone working on my book. Savas has just told me about a Greek confidence trickster who got caught because he became too confident and greedy; probably John’s teacher. This story is significant in helping us to understand both perpetrator and victims.

  This conman was acquainted with the bishops and many similar pillars of society. His victims actually sort his help in investing their money. One old man gave him total access to one bank account but the con-man went too far. After emptying that account, he found a similar looking old man to impersonate him took him to the bank to write his signature gaining access to the second account. The cashier had doubts and pressed the button for assistance. The impersonator didn’t even know who he was supposed to be and the con-man was exposed.

  His victims were helpless and many preferred not to come forwards and expose themselves as gullible fools. He got only three years in jail and that was the end of it. His friends in high places came to his aid and vouched for him. Greek jails are full of people imprisoned for minor offences or no reason at all, but I am told that if I want john to be kept in jail I must pay for his keep. It is t
hought that the con-man had stolen a total of at least ten billion Drachmas. A petty thieves and drug addicts go to jail for years but if a thief is big enough he can be let off or even given public office.

  I made Nashwan a role up bed from a duvet folded in half and blankets. It is on my valuable carpet. A very apt arrangement as it is a Kurdish marriage carpet from Uzbekistan. When he came home I took him into the dark room and then turned the light on. He was delighted.

  January 22, 2010:

  Nashwan’s behavior is intriguing me, he plays the boy in love for money and as the man of the house he must demand sex from me, but I must not ask him. He is obsessed with wanking about six times a day and believes he must get rid of his sperm. A nocturnal emission is a source of great concern because his semen touches his body. He is very upset if he comes in my mouth and I must spit it out immediately. The first time we made love I sat on his dick while caressing his body and one spot of sperm dropped from my dick onto his stomach. This has caused him deep concern ever since and he is very unhappy about unusual positions for fucking.

  Savas told me a story from Egypt. An English girl had a very beautiful Egyptian lover and she once sucked his dick and swallowed his sperm. He never kissed her again and the relationship did not continue. Savas went on to explain that Muhammad made rulings on sperm. It must be wiped off the dick or be put inside the woman, but it should never touch the skin. Nashwan told me that he does not want me to massage him because he knows he will like it. This suggests to me that he avoids any role that could be passive or even pleasurable and sex is only permissible for money or in marriage. I am reminded of the Italian comment on a girl in love, “she’s actually giving it away”.