A Kiss For You

by Rachel Van Dyken

  Then, I fucked her.

  Hard.

  I showed her how much I loved her until I couldn’t tell where I started and she began. Until all that was in that room was me and her and the thing between us that kept pulling us together like magnets. Until we were lost in sensations and orgasms.

  And in each other.

  I fucked her until we were one person, and in a way we were, because I’d lost myself along the way, and I found myself again in the most unlikely place.

  I’d found myself again in the haunted eyes of a girl who was just as lost as I was.

  Or maybe, we didn’t find each other at all.

  Maybe, we just decided to be lost together.

  King

  Doe and I were lying in bed on a Saturday afternoon, watching Demolition Man. Her idea. Not mine. Out of all the DVDs in my collection, that was the one she’s watched the most in the past few days. She also liked Disney movies, but every time she watched them, I thought about Max and a pain formed in my chest thinking that she might never be around to watch them with us.

  Or Max might be around, and Doe might be gone.

  I was going to do everything I could to get them both under one roof with me. Although as the days went by, the reality of putting together the money for the payoff seemed less and less likely.

  Disney princess movies may have just been a bunch of fairy tales, but the idea of the three of us together—four if you count Preppy—was my idea of happily ever after.

  “All restaurants are now Taco Bell,” Doe said in sync with Sandra Bullock’s character. She knew every line. It was downright adorable. Besides, we were naked, and I had one hand on her tit and the other was cupping her pussy, so I had no complaints. “Why is the house half-painted?” She turned to me abruptly, propping her head on my chest.

  “Cause when Preppy and I first moved in, it was already an old house, but we kind of trashed it with all the parties and didn’t think much of fixing it up. Then, I asked Preppy to fix it up a bit because I expected to bring Tricia and Max here.

  “But why did he stop?”

  “Because I went to prison, and the house being painted didn’t seem to matter to either of us anymore. There wasn’t a chance in hell they’d let me have her at that point. Besides, Preppy may be able to cook, and he’s a killer mechanic, but he’s a shit handyman. So, the place kind of went to hell while I was gone.”

  “Well,” she said, stretching her arms over her head. Her perky tits bounced as she yawned and hooked her leg over my thigh. “You better get to painting again because we’re going to get the money, and she’s going to come home.”

  “Yeah, baby. We’re going to get her back.” I was unsure if I was speaking to her or trying to convince myself. The truth was that each and every day that passed by, Max was slipping further and further away.

  Preppy opened the door, and Doe sat up quickly, pulling the sheet over her bare chest.

  “Dude, fucking knock much?” I asked.

  Preppy ignored me and hopped up onto the bed, settling himself between me and Doe. He slung an arm around each of us.

  “I just love you guys,” he said, squeezing the three of us together like we were one big, fat, odd-as-fuck family.

  “Is there a purpose to this love fest?” Doe asked, giggling as Preppy leaned in to tickle her.

  It should’ve pissed me off that he was even touching her, but there was nothing sexual about their connection. Although I often found myself jealous of their easy friendship. I had to work my ass off to get Pup to like me, and even then, I was shit at it.

  But, Preppy wore both his crazy and his heart on his sleeve, and I was always a little envious of how easy it was to be around him.

  All of us together just made sense. Doe could read bedtime stories to Max as she fell asleep at night. Uncle Preppy could teach her how to make pancakes. Those were the kind of images that made it all come together for me. It was clear. I had to do whatever it was going to take to make this shit work.

  Max had to come home.

  Pup had to stay.

  I’d told her I was a selfish prick, and I’d meant it. I just didn’t think she realized how true that statement really was. I guarantee that she had no clue that I was hiding the truth about her past from her.

  I didn’t plan to fall for her, but I did. Now, she wasn’t just a pawn I was going to use to get Max back. Now, she was a part of my life.

  A part I wasn’t willing to give back.

  Even if that means keeping the truth about who she really is a secret until I’m rotting in the ground.

  “As a matter of fact, there is a point. So glad you asked!” Preppy turned to me, and his face went serious. “Bear wants us to come to the compound tonight. They’re having a party since daddy over here got pissed when he threw the last one and grounded him for a month.”

  “Cut the sarcasm, Prep,” I said, I had no patience for Preppy’s humor because all I wanted was for him to leave so I could be alone again with my girl.

  “Yes, a par-tay with the bikers and the four B’s.”

  “Four B’s?” Doe asked.

  “Yep. Beer, Booze. Blow. Babes.” Preppy looked between us. “Well, maybe not the babes since you two seem to be an exclusive thing. Are you an exclusive thing? Should I be getting out the fine china and calling the preacher?” Preppy turned to Doe. “Are you with child?”

  “What?” she asked. “No! I’m not.” She laughed while Preppy pretended to pass out on the mattress.

  “But we are exclusive,” I chimed in. I’m not sure why I felt the need to say it, but I did. I needed Preppy to get the message loud and clear. It may be an innocent friendship between them, but the warning to your fellow horn-ball friends about your woman could never be too obvious or too loud.

  “Ahhhhh, so what do you say, my friends? Par-tay with Preppy tonight?” He rubbed his hands together like an evil warlock casting a spell.

  “Do you want to go?” I asked Doe who was all smiles.

  “Really?” She asked.

  “Really.” I replied. If going to a party was all it took to coax that kind of smile from her, I’d take her to one every fucking night if she wanted.

  “Yipeeeee motherfuckers! Get dressed, lovers. We’re going to the clubhouse.” Preppy stood up on the bed, jumping up and down until his head hit a spinning blade of the ceiling fan. He dropped back down to his ass, clutching his forehead. “That’s gonna leave a mark.”

  Doe leaned over Preppy and pushed his hand off his head to inspect his injury. She’d let the sheet fall from her chest, her bare breasts swayed in front of Preppy’s face.

  Preppy was no longer concerned about his wound. He openly stared at her nipples and licked his lips.

  I might not have been mad that they were friends, but my best friend was about to take a fist to the face for ogling my girl like that.

  I grabbed her waist and dragged her back to me, covering her chest with the sheet. She blushed.

  If she thought my homecoming party was wild, she would be shocked to see what went on over at the Beach Bastards’ compound. “Shit, I forgot about those fucking bikers,” I said.

  “Oh stop it,” Preppy said. “Bear’s people are harmless now. You’ve staked your claim, flagged your territory, put your sausage in the onion ring. That’s all they care about. That’s bible to them. She won’t be fucked with. Besides, I’ll be there, and so will Bear, and so will you.”

  “I’m not all that trusting of Bear these days,” I said. “It wasn’t a week ago that he was asking my girl to be his old lady.”

  “But as I said, you gots it in. It’s all good, play playyyyyyy.”

  “Preppy, how much coffee have you had this morning?” Doe asked.

  “Not much, six, seven cups. Why?” He twitched his fingers like he was playing an imaginary piano.

  “We can go, but you’re not to leave my fucking sight,” I told Doe. “I mean it. Either me or Preppy are with you at all times, got it? Worst case scenario,
go to Bear, but I swear to god if he lays a hand on you, I will chop it the fuck off.”

  It came out harsher than I intended, but I wasn’t fucking around. The reality of what could happen to her if she wandered off on her own was what was really harsh.

  Not a motherfucker in that place would survive if they touched her. Just remembering what Ed had almost done made me want to kill that piece of shit all over again.

  “Got it,” Doe said, recognizing the seriousness in my tone. She placed a hand on my shoulder. “I won’t go anywhere unless you or Preppy are with me.”

  “Good.” I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

  “So, what are we watching?” Preppy asked, leaning back on his elbows and crossing his feet at the ankles. “Ooh, Demolition Man. This is my jayum.”

  “Get the fuck out,” I said, shoving him off the bed.

  “You guys are no fucking fun,” Preppy pouted, picking himself up off the carpet. “You are all in lovers’ land and forgot all about ole Preppy over here.” He stuck out his lower lip and drooped his shoulders.

  “Have the car ready in twenty,” I barked, throwing a pillow at his head.

  “You mean the truck. My classic caddy is in a million little pieces, and ‘death by bomb’ isn’t covered by insurance,” Preppy said, dodging the pillow.

  “You don’t fucking have insurance,” I said. Preppy didn’t believe in anything that kept him on the grid, no matter how illegal it was.

  “But if I did, it wouldn’t cover it,” he said, waving us off and leaving the room.

  “Remind me to get a deadbolt for that door,” I said.

  “Oh, stop. Preppy’s great, just highly caffeinated,” Doe said in his defense.

  “You can back out now if you’ve changed your mind. We can stay here and stay naked and watch whatever stupid movie you want, as long as we are naked while watching it. We don’t have to go to Bear’s party if you don’t think you will feel comfortable.”

  “I want to get to know your friends better. I want to get out of the house for a while. I want it all.” Doe smiled. “And I want it with you.”

  I wanted to puff out my chest and beat on it like a gorilla. Her words were empowering. She wanted it all.

  With me.

  I felt so good about where we were and where we were heading that I almost felt okay about living the rest of my life lying to her.

  Almost.

  King

  Bear’s clubhouse was an old two-story apartment complex with a courtyard in the center and a small, kidney-shaped pool that had been graffitied a million times over.

  Plastic patio chairs with gaping holes in the seats and backs, some missing legs, were scattered everywhere. A few were floating upside down in the deep end the pool in a foot of green sludgy water. There was no sophisticated speaker system. An ancient boom box sat on top of a small round table blaring Johnny Cash. Its cord ran into the shallow water of the pool and across the courtyard where it was plugged into a wall outlet inside one of the rooms.

  Scantily clad women were everywhere, and bikers of all ages, shapes, and sizes lingered about in various states of drunkenness. Two muscle heads wearing their cuts with nothing but their bare chests underneath, arm-wrestled in the corner on top of an overturned laundry basket.

  Two women with matching bleach blonde hair, both topless, were making out on the second-floor balcony against the railing, while a skinny prospect stood close by looking on with heavily lidded lust filled eyes, with a hard-on he wasn’t even trying to hide, straining against his jeans.

  Bear was the first person to greet us. “King, you motherfucker!” he shouted, standing in the open doorway of one of the motel rooms, his arm draped around the neck of a girl with innocent chubby looking cheeks, but a very weary look in her eyes. “In here!” He waved us over and practically shoved the girl out of the room. She would have landed face-first on the concrete if Preppy hadn’t caught her and set her back on her feet.

  “Thanks,” she said, looking up at Preppy. Preppy scrunched his nose as if he was confused by her thanks, then stepped around her. She looked back at him as she walked away.

  “What the fuck was that?” I asked.

  “No fucking clue,” Preppy said seriously, his usual humor nowhere in sight. “Let’s get this party started.”

  “Doe, baby! You’re here!” Bear exclaimed, pulling Doe into a hug that lasted a beat too long. I clenched my fists. Bear didn’t seem to notice, and if he did, he didn’t seem to care. “Bump, get my friends a drink!”

  A freckle-faced redheaded prospect I’d seen a few times before, filled three red cups from the keg and handed them to us.

  “Got anything in a bottle for the lady?” I asked, emptying my cup in just a few swallows.

  I needed something to take the edge off, but I wouldn’t put it past one of these little prospect fuckers to try and slip Doe something. We were friends of the club, but some of these newbies may not know the extent of which we weren’t to be fucked with. I was about to explode out of my skin. Why did we come here again? Oh yeah, because Doe wanted to.

  I was turning into such a fucking pussy over this girl.

  “You heard the man. A bottle for the lady,” Bear ordered, taking the cup from Doe’s hands before she had a chance to lift it to her lips.

  Bear chugged the contents of her cup while Bump handed her an unopened bottle of beer. I discarded my cup and used the buckle on one of the belts around my forearms to pop off the cap for her. “Overreacting much, buddy? Wouldn’t let anything happen to her. Not on my watch. Not at my place. You should know that.”

  I shrugged, and Preppy chimed in before I could say anything. “Don’t get all fucking butt hurt about it, Bear. King doesn’t even trust me around her, and I only wanted to take her out on a date, and maybe put the tip in a little, but noooooo.”

  It was a lie. I hope Preppy knew that. I trusted him with my life, and I knew he wouldn’t do anything with Doe that meant upsetting me. But that didn’t mean I didn’t want to slit his throat every time he smiled at her. Especially when every single day since the day I decided I needed her in my life, I’d felt like my every move had to be thought out around her so I wouldn’t send her running scared.

  Or worse, accidentally tell her the truth.

  “You wanna get this shit started?” Bear asked, holding out his hand he pointed to an old nightstand where several lines of white powder were already cut. I shook my head. I hadn’t touched anything but alcohol and weed since I got out, but Preppy stepped up and did two lines. He knew me better than anyone, and he knew that a bump was the last thing I needed with all the adrenaline already coursing through my veins. But he also knew that doing coke with the bikers, especially Bear, was like their version of bringing a nice bottle of wine to a dinner party. A show of respect. Biker etiquette, if that makes any sense. I lit a cigarette and glanced over at Doe, who was looking around the place like she was discovering the lost city of Atlantis.

  Another one of Bear’s crew popped his head into the room. I recognized him right away as a guy named Harris, who’d been voted in just before I went away. “Bear, your old man’s here. He wants to see you and said to bring King and his crew so he can say hi. He’s back in the office.”

  Bear chugged his beer and let out a long belch. He threw his now empty cup at Bump. It bounced off his head and landed on the ground.

  “Clean that shit up,” Bear ordered, leading us from the room. “Come on, kids. Let’s say hi to my old man and get it over with.”

  Bear’s dad was the president of the Beach Bastards. One day, he would take the gavel from him and become the man in charge.

  When we walked into the office, the door closed behind us and a clicking noise echoed in the room. Preppy turned back to the door and turned the handle, but it was already locked.

  Shit. Bear swore.

  Behind the desk, on the far side of the room, a chair sat, facing away from us. It slowly turned, and where I’d expected to see B
ear’s dad, was Isaac.

  “Motherfucker,” Preppy swore.

  Isaac’s feet were propped up on the top of the desk. He was caressing his long-braided beard. A toothpick hung haphazardly from his bottom lip. His eyes immediately narrowed in on Doe.

  Fuck.

  His eyes darted from me to Doe as he spoke. “And who is this?”

  I felt my face getting hot with rage. If I ever saw that cocksucker Harris again I was going to tear him limb from chubby limb.

  It was at that moment I realized how stupid bringing Doe to the party really was. Isaac was a dangerous man, and although I thought I had time before he rolled into town, I’d known him being around was a possibility. I’d planned to send Doe to Grace’s house in a couple of days, at least until this all blew over.

  Obviously, it wasn’t soon enough.

  It was a complete lapse in judgment on my part. My brain had been put on hold because all the blood had been in my cock, which for the better part of a week had been deeply lodged inside Doe’s tight as fuck pussy.

  “She’s with me,” I answered, keeping my voice as casual as possible. Trying not to let my words scream SHE’S WITH ME, IN A FOREVER KIND OF WAY SO BACK THE FUCK OFF OF HER, ASSHOLE. Instead, I kept my face hard and unemotional. “They with you?”

  I gestured to the two blondes with sketchy looking matching pink BITCH tattoos on their biceps. They were making a show of touching each other’s huge fake tits.

  “I guess they are,” Isaac said with a laugh. He clasped his hands together and gestured to the chair in front of him. “Have a seat, Mr. King.”

  I sat and pulled Doe down onto my lap where I kept a hand possessively around the back of her neck. It was a gesture that said she was with me, but it was disrespectful enough to Doe to tell Isaac that she wasn’t all that important. She let out a surprised little yelp, and I rubbed the back of her neck with the pad of my thumb to comfort her. Her pulse raced in her neck.

  Isaac’s gaze roamed up her calves and settled between her legs where I was sure he’d caught a glimpse of her panties. I wanted to cross her legs or throw her off of my lap so that he’d stop looking at my girl like he wanted to eat her, but that would show him that she was my weakness. Instead, I slightly parted her knees with my hands to show Isaac more of her. He licked his bottom lip, and his gaze met mine.