Girl of Shadow

by Holly Chavez

  Wait.

  I look down at my bed and then around the room and find everything perfectly neat and put back together. It’s unsettling compared to the last time I saw it. Every drop of blood gone and not even the scent of blood lingers. Someone did some serious cleaning. It almost makes me feel like the last twenty-fours never happened if not for the pain coming from my body.

  With some renewed hope, I get up and grab more pain pills, swallowing them down dry. If I can just talk to Darick and somehow make him understand, then I can still fix this. If he had already told my father, I’m sure someone would have greeted me in my room, right? I pace back and forth for a bit, trying to determine the best course of action. In the end, the only thing I can think to do is face the day with bravery and hope Darick hasn’t said anything yet and I can somehow get through to him before he does. If I have to threaten him, then I will. I have to get his attention before breakfast before he has a chance to talk to The Boss privately.

  It’s time to get ready.

  Stripping off my ruined clothes, I throw the pile into the fireplace. I never want to see that set of clothes again. In fact, I might create a whole new outfit all together. The cloak is way too thick for the kinds of movements I need to make anyway. Lighting a match and throwing it in, I watch the edge of the material burn. Satisfied that the fire will take care of the rest, I turn and gather the things I’ll need to bandage myself up.

  Treating my injuries doesn’t take long at all. My body is bruised all over, but the only open wound of notable size is the one on my hand. I clean it as best as I can and then heat a needle and sit at my vanity and thread it. Pressing the needle through my skin at regular intervals, I try to keep my hand steady. Before I know it, and only a few tears later, the wound is stitched. I wrap it in cloth to protect the stitches from catching on anything until I can put my gloves on.

  I dress as if this is my last day on earth, wearing a favorite dress and leaving the black behind. My dress is dark blue and reaches just past my knees. The matching corset is of the same color but embellished slightly with little clear beads. It has never been worn. Mirna bought it for my birthday a year or two ago when she was attempting to brighten my wardrobe, but haven’t worn it until now since I have been in my own self-proscribed mourning for years. It’s loose, but with a few pins I manage to make it look okay.

  I comb my hair until every strand is shiny and all the leaves, grass, and other things from the night before fall away. I decide to leave half of it down with the upper half in a clip; not something I usually do, but it helps to conceal the scraps on my neck. I apply makeup liberally, wanting to hide the small scraps around my face and the red bags under my eyes. Throwing on black gloves and my usual boots, I manage to be ready in record time.

  I consider taking a weapon with me, but what purpose would it serve against dozens of guards? Either Darick told or he didn’t. My very life rests in my ability to change his mind.

  Just like any other ordinary day, I walk the halls with my head held high, my confidence growing and my panic easing with every step. No one has stopped me. I haven’t received any unusual attention at all. The maids are busy about the house while the guards make rounds, just a regular day.

  Fighting the urge to hurry, I take the spiral staircase down at a steady pace. For the first time, the sight of my family portrait doesn’t bother me. I am what I am, and it’s time I accept who I am. The people in the picture next to me don’t define me, nor the wealth, or the mutual look of misery we all share.

  Walking into the dining room, I don’t bother to hide from Darick’s gaze. I meet him straight on, practically daring him to do something. His eyes, filled with questions, bore into mine. He hasn’t told. Our eyes remain locked as I take a seat across Mirna. Alroy is sitting next to The Boss discussing something in whispers and none of my brothers are in sight.

  I break contact first, focusing the bulk of my attention on my distraught friend.

  She looks as put together as she does any other day aside from the puffy eyes from crying and a new gleam reflected back at me that feels all too familiar. I’m surprised she managed to get dressed.

  “How are you holding up?”

  Her lip quivers, but she pulls it together. She shrugs. “I don’t really know yet. I’ve been keeping myself… distracted.” I try to think of something to say, but nothing seems right so I turn the conversation in another direction. “Do you want to do something today? Maybe take the horses out or go on a walk?”

  “Actually I need to show you something.”

  “What is it?” My interest peaked.

  “I’ll tell you about it after breakfast.”

  “Okay.” I eye Darick. “I need to take care of something first. Can you give me an hour?”

  “Is everything alright?”

  “I think so. I’ll explain more when I get to your room.”

  I finish up my light breakfast and walk to the head of the table, approaching my father.

  I clear my throat and both men look over at me. “Would you mind if I borrowed your Enforcer for a moment.”

  The Boss looks at me annoyed. “He’s on duty.”

  “I know and I’m sorry to interrupt his work, but I would like to discuss some details of our wedding.”

  “It is a year out.” He says it as a statement, but I chose to answer it as a question anyway.

  “Yes.”

  “Fine.” He turns to Darick. “Have someone cover for you.” Darick nods and leaves the room for a moment, returning with a guard in tow. The guard takes up position behind The Boss and I follow Darick out of the room.

  We don’t say a word as we weave through the halls together. He clearly has a place in mind for our conversation and I just have to trust it’s safe. He takes me into what looks like a conference room. It has a table with chairs around it and white walls; nothing else. There are a few of these in the house meant for guard meetings. It would make sense that Darick would want to speak here. It’s technically his territory.

  He shuts the door behind him while I stand up against the wall feeling a little unsure about all of this. Where to begin?

  “Start from the beginning.” I hadn’t realized I’d spoken out loud.

  “There are too many beginnings of this story and to be perfectly honest, I don’t trust you.”

  “How about you ask me a question and then I’ll ask you one. We can pass if the question is too much.” He looks slightly annoyed by my suggestion, but it’s the only way for this conversation to be fair. Why would I give him anything for nothing in return?

  “Okay. Take a seat.” He pulls out a chair for me. I sit casually. He takes the seat right next to me so we are forced to be close to one another. I start to fidget with my hair as the silence stretches between us. I can’t take it anymore. “I’ll start. What were you doing at Margery’s house last night?”

  “I was looking for you.”

  “You were looking for the Girl of Shadow?”

  “It’s my turn to ask a question. Who sent you to kill Erik last night?”

  “I’m afraid I’ll have to pass on that question. Ask another one.”

  “Did the Red Spider send you to kill Erik last night?” I shouldn’t even be surprised at what Darick already knows.

  “You know I can’t answer that either.”

  “But your non-answer tells me enough. As for your question, no, I was not looking for the Girl of Shadow last night. I was looking for you.” I try to comment, but he cuts me off. “My next question is, how long do you think you can do this before your father finds out?”

  “I guess a lot of that depends on you?”

  “I haven’t said a word to him, nor will I, but he’s determined to find the Girl of Shadow.”

  “Well let’s hope he doesn’t find out. How long have you known about me?”

  “I put the pieces together last night when I came across this.” He pulls my necklace from his bag and hands it to me.

  “Where’d y
ou get it?” He raises a brow at me, but answers.

  “Daytin picked it off the floor after you attacked him. I recognized it immediately as yours. It seems like a risky thing to wear?”

  “Is that your question?”

  “No. What I want to know is, what’s your end goal here? Do you even have a plan?”

  I find the question difficult to answer. What is my end goal? I want to see my father removed and I want to be the Girl of Shadow full time, protecting the people. Yet, I feel no closer to any one of those things. “I… it’s complicated.”

  “I don’t doubt it is. Look, I think I can help you, but it’s going to require trust from both of us.”

  “Okay.” I’m interested. This is not the way I pictured our conversation going. I figured there would a lot more yelling and me begging…

  “First, I have to know if you’re working for the Red Spider. Just a yes or no will suffice. I’m not asking you to tell me who he is and nothing we say here will get back to your father. I have my own secrets to protect.”

  I consider it, chewing the idea over to see if there is any way he can use the information against Fernando. Without him knowing who the Red Spider is I don’t see how my answer can be used against him. But what got me was the part where he said he had secrets; ones he didn’t want getting back to The Boss. He’s hiding something and he’s willing to share it with me. “Yes, I do.”

  “Then Girl of Shadow, I could really use your help.”

  About Author

  Holly Chavez was born in El Paso, Tx into a military family. She graduated high school in Osan, South Korea and went on to earn a BA in Criminal Justice from NMSU and a MA in Science of Psychology from UofP. She is married with three children and resides along the bank of the Rio Grande River in the Land of Enchantment.

  You can find her on facebook and goodreads or email her at mostlovebooks@gmail.com.

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