Den of Sorrows

by Quinn Loftis

  Decebel closed his eyes and let out a long breath. "I'll be waiting to hear from you," he said to Vasile.

  "Don't be too hard on her," Alina spoke up. "She's young and she has a lot on her shoulders."

  "I understand that, but at some point she's going to have to accept my place in our pack and our relationship. You know I'm not trying to belittle her, Alina. She's my equal in every way, but I'm responsible for her, not the other way around. I will stand before the Great Luna one day and be questioned on how I led my family and how I loved my mate and those under my care. It won't be Jen's actions that are judged, but mine."

  "You can't expect her to figure it all out in a year," Sally spoke up. "Jen is every bit as dominant as you. She's protective of those she cares about. She's determined and she needs to feel like you trust her. You guys have been through so much. I think you both have things to learn."

  Decebel thought about it before finally nodding. "Fair enough, healer. I will consider your words before I talk to her."

  Jacque stepped forward and placed a hand on his arm. "Remember her words were spoken out of hurt and anger not because she doesn't respect you or love you. I think you should consider it a good sign that she was yelling at you. The time to be worried is when Jen stops yelling because that's when she's decided it's no longer worth her energy. You don’t want to be in that place."

  His jaw clenched but he didn't say anything more. He just turned and quietly left.

  Jacque turned to her own mate and frowned. "We can talk after Vasile is done."

  "Should I be worried because you aren't yelling?" Fane asked her.

  Jacque smiled sweetly at him. "Who said I'm not yelling?" She opened their bond on her end and growled, "HOW DARE YOU KEEP SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT FROM ME!"

  Fane flinched.

  "Vasile, Alina." Jacque gave them both a curt nod and then left. Jacque tried very hard not to imagine what those poor children must have looked like. She tried not to think about blood stained fangs dripping from the evil beings that were responsible for the atrocities. She tried hardest not to think about what those parents must have felt when they found their precious little ones drained of life.

  Her stomach felt as though a huge rock had dropped to the bottom of it and her feet suddenly quit moving. Jacque stood stock still in the middle of the hall attempting to get her breathing under control.

  "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't want you to feel like this," Fane said as he walked up beside her and took her face in his hands.

  "You can't protect me from everything," she said quietly, blinking back tears.

  Fane pressed his forehead to hers and let out a sigh. "But it's my job to at least try to. Just as I will try to protect our child from everything."

  Jacque closed her eyes and took comfort in her mate’s strength. She was still upset with him, but she needed him.

  "I'm always here for you, Luna."

  Sally stared at Vasile and Alina, feeling like she was looking at strangers rather than at the parent figures that she’d come to see them as. "Why didn't you want us to know? Why did you ask our mates to do something that you knew would only upset us?"

  Vasile rubbed his hand over his face and leaned back against his desk. "Being a leader isn't all that it's cracked up to be. We make very tough decisions. My daughter-in-law will be having her first child in a month, my first grandchild. How was I supposed to tell her that there are crazed vampires out there eating children?"

  "Maybe you just trust that she's stronger than she appears and would have been able to handle it," Sally countered.

  "Maybe. But I didn't feel that was the best option."

  "And what you feel is the best is always right?"

  "Sally," Costin warned.

  She ignored him.

  Vasile's eyes flashed with irritation. "No, I'm not always right. But that doesn’t change the fact that decisions must be made. This is not a democracy. A wolf pack would not survive if it were. This is a dictatorship. I am Alpha. I am the strongest and those I care about will submit—period. I make decisions that I think are best for everyone. I listen to wise counsel, but ultimately the choice is mine and the consequences are mine as well. I realize that it is still difficult for you girls to understand. In the Canis lupus world, there has to be one leader and many followers. Otherwise, there will be utter chaos. The health of the pack is paramount. You may not like it, but you will accept it."

  "Vasile, please," Alina said as she placed a hand on his arm.

  Sally waited several heartbeats as she stared at the tired looking Alpha. Finally she nodded. "I get it. But it doesn't make it any easier."

  "I never claimed it would be. Vent to your mate. Drink hot chocolate with your females, and think of all the ways you'd like to injure me because of your irritation. Ultimately, though, just like the males in the pack, you must obey."

  "What about Decebel?" she asked.

  "He can make his own choices for his own pack. But because he respects me and my mate, he listens to our counsel. That is his choice. His pack cannot question his authority. His mate may do so, but she should do it in privacy so as not to confuse the emotions of the others under Decebel's lead. That is something she will need to learn as she continues to grow into her role as Alpha female. I don't blame her for being upset, but her behavior today was unacceptable." He met her eyes and, after a minute, Sally dropped her gaze.

  "Fair enough," she answered. She turned to Costin. "Ready?"

  He looked at her wearily. "Uh, sure." Then he turned back to the Alphas. "Guess we will talk to you guys tomorrow. Cypher," he said and nodded to the warlock king and then took Sally's hand and led her from the room.

  Sally followed quietly, still processing Vasile's words.

  "Are you mad at me?" Costin asked quietly.

  "Irritated," Sally corrected. "I get that you have to obey, but it sort of makes me feel like you put Vasile's wants before mine, though I know that's not really what you were doing."

  "We aren't human," Costin reminded her.

  "And I am not Canis lupus, so I suppose we should both cut each other some slack."

  Peri flashed back into Vasile's office and looked around. "That party broke up fast. Guess that's what happens when Jen flips her lid." She took a step toward Cypher. "You ready for me to take you home?"

  He nodded.

  Then Peri looked back at Vasile as she took Cypher’s hand. "They will come to realize you were right to withhold the information," she assured the Alpha.

  "Was I though?" He glanced at his mate and then back to Peri.

  She shrugged. "Doesn't matter if you were. You're Alpha. You own your decisions and stand by them. You must."

  "But I am to protect them and nurture them in all ways."

  "You aren't perfect, wolf. You, of all people, know that sometimes the difficult decisions we, as leaders, must make will be the most unpopular decisions. But that doesn't matter. They are still decisions that have to be made by someone. Suck it up and move on."

  Vasile chuckled. "Thank you for the advice."

  Peri saluted him. "It's what I do."

  She left him and Alina and dropped Cypher off before heading back to the veil of her realm. Four pixies awaited her.

  "How is it that you guys weren't in your realm when it went into lockdown?" she asked them before they could begin giving their report.

  "Ainsel likes to keep a presence in the human realm so we can let him know what the other supernatural beings are doing," the leader of the group answered.

  Peri nodded. "He's a wise king for doing so. So" —she folded her arms across her chest— "what info do you have for me?"

  "It isn't good," the smallest one answered.

  Peri rolled her eyes. "Good to know I can count on some things to never change. Hit me."

  "Word has traveled through some of the trolls that guard the entrances to the In-Between. It seems that there have been more killings of the little humans in the land called Canada. The
vampires have grown in numbers while they've been in hiding."

  Peri cursed under her breath. "Any idea how many covens in Canada?"

  "The trolls like to exaggerate so who knows if they are right, but the rumor is that there are around thirty."

  She closed her eyes and shook her head. "That's about thirty too many."

  "What are we going to do?"

  "Pray that the wolves are eating their Wheaties and that they bring their A game to the rumble."

  The pixies frowned. "We do not understand?"

  Peri waved them off. "Basically it means we need the wolves to work a miracle."

  "What if they cannot defeat the vampires?"

  "Then we, my little tiny friends, are—what the humans call—royally screwed."

  Chapter 5

  "I hurt, so I hurt you. I bleed, so I want you to bleed. I feel betrayed, so I will become the betrayer. Why is it that we treat the ones we love the most, nearly as bad as we treat our enemies?" ~Jen

  Decebel stood outside of their bedroom door. It was nothing new for them to fight. It was nothing new for Jennifer to say something in the heat of the moment that she didn't really mean. But he had never before felt that she saw him as weak, as incapable of making the right decisions for their pack and family. He felt as though she'd grabbed him by the balls and successfully neutered him. He was angry, but more than that, he was hurt.

  She'd shut the bond down tight. But he could somehow still feel the rage rolling off of his mate through their bedroom door. Decebel usually ran headfirst into an argument with her, but after her harsh words, he found himself hesitant to stand before her criticism again and be found wanting. He listened as she sung to their daughter and knew that it was her way of calming herself. He decided that perhaps, for once, they both needed to cool off before facing off again. At least that was what he told himself was best as he walked away from the door. He didn't examine the fact that he was afraid that if he walked into the room at that moment, he might say some very hurtful things, just because she'd so thoroughly hurt and embarrassed him. Two wrongs didn't make a right. No matter how satisfying it might have been to retaliate, the feeling would have been fleeting.

  Jen listened as her mate’s footsteps faded away. Decebel had never walked away from a fight. She deserved it. Her words had been harsh, unkind, and completely out of line, and yet she couldn’t shut herself up. She'd been so angry that he'd chosen not to talk to her about the vampires that she'd just lost it. After so many secrets they'd kept from one another over the past year, so much pain they'd endured because of some delusional need to protect one another from the impossible, still they hadn't learned. They were stronger together.

  Tears tracked down her face as she looked down at the little girl she held in her arms. They'd made Thia from the love that they shared. She was a living testament of how much they adored one another, but still Jen had ripped into him as if he was her most hated enemy.

  "I suck, Thia girl," Jen whispered. "And not in the good way."

  Thia grinned up at her, completely unaware of the turmoil Jen was feeling. Oh to be so innocent again, she thought. She lowered her daughter to the floor and then sat down next to her. There was no point in seeking him out. If he hadn't come in, it was because he wasn't ready to speak with her. So she'd spend time with Thia and hope that she hadn't done irreparable damage to their relationship.

  Jen kept the bond closed, unable to bear feeling the hurt and anger that she'd no doubt caused him. For the first time in their short relationship, she wondered if he'd be able to forgive her.

  Fane pulled Jacque into his lap. He'd followed her to the library and though she'd attempted to keep space between them, he wouldn't allow it. There had been enough space between them in the past and he wasn’t going to allow anger or hurt from either of them to come between his need for her touch.

  "I am sorry that I hurt you," he whispered into her hair. She smelled amazing, like his.

  "Yes, it upsets me that you didn't talk to me. I'm a girl. I want us to communicate and share all of our deepest darkest crap, blah, blah, blah. But I also need to remember that you are your father’s son. He is your Alpha and you have to obey him."

  Fane leaned back so that he could look at her. "Really?"

  She frowned. "Don't look so shocked that I can be reasonable."

  "Well, you have to admit that if I'm going on recent past experiences, reasonable has not been your MO."

  "True enough. Can't fault you there. Can I just say being married is hard?"

  He grinned at her. "Yes, it is. But it has its benefits."

  "Like?" she prompted.

  "Making up," he whispered in her ear.

  Jacque snorted out a laugh. "One track mind. Will that ever change?"

  "I hope not," he said as he ran his hand over her belly. "I hope you never tire of me, because I assure you, I will never get enough of you."

  She was quiet and Fane felt her worry. "Children, Fane. They're killing children."

  "Shh," he soothed. "We will deal with them. Taking out the bad guys is sort of what we do."

  "But how many more will die?"

  "I don't know. I wish I could tell you none. But evil doesn't just hang out waiting for justice to kick its butt."

  She leaned back against him and he wrapped her tighter in his arms. "I love you, Jacquelyn. Thank you, for understanding why I didn't tell you about the vampires."

  "Part of me is glad I didn't know last night," she admitted.

  "Why?"

  "Because it gave me one more night to be in your arms without feeling guilty. Because how can we possibly be basking in each other’s pleasure when there are innocent children being murdered?"

  "Children," he paused, hating to say it, "were being murdered by evil people before the vamps even did it. Does that mean we stop living because people are hurt by evil? We would go crazy if all we did was focus on the bad in this world, Luna. There has to be some good in it for us in order to keep us sane so that we can help those who need it."

  "Are you just saying that so I'll keep making love to you?"

  He turned her face to look at him. "I'm saying it because—though I am charged, just like my father and the other wolves, to help the weak—you come first. Always. I can't give to others if I have nothing to give. You are what fills me up. Your love, your touch, your wants and desires. You make me capable to do what I need to do. I'm asking you not to take that special thing away from us just because of the ugly and painful things in this world."

  She stared at him, considering his words. "I get it. You are my home, my safe place, and I'm yours. I would never take that from you."

  Fane leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers, savoring her taste. She was definitely his home and no matter how much darkness they faced in the world, her light would always be enough to lead him home.

  Costin held Sally's hand as she led him to the potions’ room. It was always the place she went when she needed to think. He didn't know if she really wanted him around her, or if she needed to process what was going on, but he couldn't bring himself to ask because he was afraid she'd tell him to leave.

  "What are you worried about?" she asked him just as they reached the door.

  "Why aren't you throwing a fit like your two comrades?"

  She quirked an eyebrow at him. "When have I ever been the fit throwing type?"

  They entered the room and Costin took his usual place on the stool across from her worktable. They had their own potions’ room back at the Serbia mansion, but they often stayed at the Romanian mansion so that Sally could continue to learn from Rachel. And also because Jacque would be having her baby soon and Sally was determined not to miss it.

  "You've thrown a fit or two since we've met."

  "It's not nice to point out your mate’s flaws," Sally scolded him.

  He grinned. "I never said your fit throwing was a flaw. On the contrary, it's quite attractive. You get all pink faced and huffy. It makes me want to poke
you some more just to watch you get yourself all worked up."

  "Why?"

  "Because then I get to use my suave moves on you to get your feathers unruffled."

  She shook her head at him. "You're such a guy."

  "You weren't complaining last night," he teased her.

  "Anyways," Sally said as she took several old books off a shelf above the table. "I'm not as mad as they are because I guess I don’t have the same emotional ties to the issue that they do. We don’t have children. I mean, I love Thia and I will love Jacque's baby as well, but they aren't mine. I think there are things you just can't feel until you have your own child. So I'm better able to look at the situation a little differently. I understand why Vasile did what he did—doesn't mean I like it—but I get it."

  Costin stood and walked over to her. He wrapped his arms around her from behind and pulled her back against his chest. He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to her neck before whispering in her ear, "Thank you for getting it. I appreciate your ability to stay calm and think before you decide whether or not to throw a fit." Costin grunted when she elbowed his stomach.

  "I don't throw fits," she bit out.

  "Just keep telling yourself that, Brown Eyes."

  Cypher paced the throne room, dreading the moment when he would have to tell Lilly what was coming. He was going to have to accompany the wolves on their mission. There was no way they could handle such a large number of covens alone. From what Peri had told them, and judging from the anger that radiated off of her, they weren't planning on leaving any survivors.

  The large double doors opened and his mate strode into the room. She may not have been born royalty, but she carried herself with a regality that had even him wanting to bow to her. Her eyes were assessing and her lips pursed slightly as though she was deep in thought. To his surprise, she walked straight up to him and wrapped her arms around him pulling him close.

  Cypher let out a deep sigh as he let her scent and peaceful presence fill him. The world was falling apart at the hands of the vampires and yet just one hug from her could make everything okay.