Anna's Secret

by Blossom Turner

  Rita clucked her tongue and shook her head. “You know the story, Anna, of how I lost my youngest son, Eddie, in a motorcycle accident. But there is something tougher than death. I lost my other son, John, to bitterness over decisions I made—some right, some wrong. John, who is still alive today, I never see. That grieves my heart way more than the son I have no chance to see until we meet in heaven.

  A smile filled Rita’s face with joy as her mind clearly switched to memories of Eddie. “Yes, Eddie is up there waiting for me. He was such a gentle boy with a zest for life and adventure. Oh, how he loved Jesus. Did I ever tell you, Anna, how Eddie introduced me to the Lord?”

  Anna knew the story well. Rita loved to retell the way her son Eddie brought Jesus into their troubled home.

  “Rita, that story gives me such hope, do tell me again.”

  The canted afternoon light split through the western window and spilled on the bed. Rita turned her face into it. A faraway look spread across her face as she began the story as if for the first time.

  Anna’s eyes pooled with unshed tears gazing at Rita. Her once plump cheeks were sunken and hollow, her voice whispered through empty gums, and her fair skin was leathered and seamed with endless lines, but a joy radiated there. Anna had never seen anyone more beautiful.

  Matt could tell something was wrong. Since their engagement party, Anna held him at a careful distance.

  He couldn’t put his finger on anything that went wrong, for though she had been nervous, she had skillfully conversed with everyone. The fact she was well-read on current events and delightfully unassuming won over even his staunchest of colleagues. She had a way of turning the conversation around to ask about their life. Most of his friends loved to talk about their latest and greatest discoveries, and Anna listened well with genuine interest.

  Then on the dance floor, his quiet fiancée became elegance wrapped in beauty. The crowd was mesmerized by her grace and incredible ability to glide like an angel around the room.

  His colleagues teased him unmercifully, wondering how he had landed such a classy woman and had shown genuine interest and acceptance. Even Tamara had given him thumbs up from across the dance floor while they were doing the cha cha, and he now hoped she got it. Anna was the love of his life.

  He had not invited Tamara but knew her curiosity would propel her to break etiquette and attend uninvited. He had expected trouble, or at the very least a snide remark or two, but she had been on her best behavior.

  That one remark about Anna wanting to run away made by Tamara’s group was about the worst of the evening. For the life of him, he couldn’t tell what the problem was.

  Anna had even won the hearts of his mom and dad, which blew him away. His mom and Anna had giggled like teenagers and whispered like old friends. He had teased Anna saying, “Who knew a good shortbread recipe would have that kind of power?” She had wrinkled her nose at him and laughed. “As if. Why are men so clueless?”

  He hadn’t understood that comment then and still didn’t now. But what he did understand is that his Anna was missing, and the troubled woman of his past had returned. He needed to find out why.

  That Saturday afternoon he prepped for the evening meal. They would enjoy barbecued steak, baked potato, and a tossed salad. He had insisted Anna rest while Melody had her nap and assured her he could handle the details. He had every intention of getting to the bottom of her angst and didn’t want her exhausted.

  A disheveled Anna with Melody in hand appeared on the patio a good two hours later.

  “Can’t believe I crashed like that. I didn’t hear a thing until Melody woke up.”

  Matt looked at his adorable girls, both with sleepy eyes and hair sticking up in every direction. He kissed them both on the cheeks.

  “Got the lawn cut while my two angels rested,” he said. “And supper is well underway. I’ve phoned Lorena, and we’re going to drop Melody off at her house so we can have the evening to ourselves.”

  He glanced at his watch. That gives us five hours alone before we’ll have to pick her up and get her to bed. Time’s-a-wasting—let’s get going.”

  Anna smiled in delight. “Melody, did you hear that? I get to eat steak without you bothering me twenty times.” She snuggled Melody close and then whirled her around. Melody giggled in pleasure.

  Dinner passed slowly—a wonderful treat where they both took the uninterrupted time to enjoy every bite.

  “Goodness, I’m sooo full.” Anna placed her hands on her stomach and rubbed. “I’m going to have to undo the top button on my jeans, and you’re going to have to be a gentleman and not say a word.”

  “I warned you, Anna, three pieces of sour dough bread before a steak is never a good idea.”

  She scrambled around the table and placed her finger on his mouth. “I told you, not a word.”

  He rose from the table and grabbed her close. “Well, I know how to make that happen,” he said. With a gleam in his eyes, his head drifted slowly down to her laughing lips.

  The heat from her body radiated like the afternoon sun as shivers skimmed along his flesh. She reached up and circled the muscled column of his neck. Her fingers lightly combed their way through the ends of his hair. A hunger coursed through his body. His mouth left hers with a tearing slowness as he stepped out of the danger zone and back into reality.

  “What? The grape juice doesn’t taste good after having the wine?” She muttered under her breath.

  “What did you say?” He couldn’t keep the shock from his voice.

  She moved aside and picked up the dishes from the patio table. “Nothing.”

  For a couple of hours Anna had returned to him, but now the guarded Anna was back, the one who perplexed him to no end.

  He marched over and took the dishes from her hands and placed them heavily back down on the table. “Come,” he said. “We have to talk.”

  He captured her hand in his and pulled her to the porch swing where they sat together. Not once did he break his stare. He needed to know what was going on inside that pretty little head of hers.

  He waited.

  She waited.

  They both started talking at the same time.

  “So, what is—”

  “I’m sorry, Matt—”

  “Ladies first.” He said. One hand gallantly rolled in the air.

  “Matt, I’m sorry, I don’t know how to even have this conversation.”

  His hands turned instantly clammy, and his heart hammered in his ears. “What is it?”

  “What I just said is something Tamara said to me the night of our party. She was the wine and I was the grape juice.”

  Matt’s eyes fell to his lap. “I wondered if she would try and corner you. I didn’t invite her, by the way—she just showed up. But when you didn’t mention her, I thought maybe she had enough class to let things be.” He read hurt in Anna’s eyes.

  “Anna, I tried to tell you about her that day we went for a walk in the park. I wanted you to know about my past, but you said you didn’t need to know. Remember?”

  He paused. “I have no problem sharing my life with you—all of it, the good, the bad, and the ugly.”

  A disturbed look flickered in her soulful brown eyes. “I have only one question, Matt.”

  He inched closer taking both of her hands in his. His thumbs traced up and down her wrists, but his eyes never left her face. “Ask me whatever you want.”

  “How long ago was it over between the two of you? Because she was talking about a current thing.”

  He did not hesitate. “Not a chance, Anna. I haven’t been with Tamara since you came back into my life.”

  “Matt,” she said falling forward into his arms. The swing jostled wildly and she laughed against his lips. “I love you, Matthew Carmichael, so much.”

  Anna’s peace of mind lasted exactly two weeks. Lo
ng enough to set the wedding date for April thirtieth and meet with Carla the wedding planner. Matt had hired her to help pull off a wedding in six weeks—and no more.

  Anna had been thrilled that God arranged the opportunity to talk to Matt and that one question had quelled all the others. She concluded that Tamara was exactly who Faye pegged her to be—a brilliant liar.

  Then Matt’s cell phone dinged, and a text appeared. Anna didn’t mean to be nosy, but Matt had left the phone on the counter and gone to the washroom. Enough of the message was visible to send her heart crashing to the floor.

  “Hey, Matt, are we meeting at seven tomorrow night or eight? Can’t wait.” The contact name clearly said Tamara Stanton.

  She waited for him to return, and watched him grab his phone and quickly slide it into his pocket, but not before he glanced at the message. He held his face poker straight, with not a hint of emotion.

  “Okay, dear,” he said with a smile, “I’ll head home now, got surgeries scheduled early first thing and I need to get some shut eye.

  “Oh, and don’t forget I have a long workday tomorrow and won’t be over in the evening. Instead, I scheduled Carla to come over for some girl talk to sort out all the arrangements for the wedding. Stuff I know nothing about—like decorations, flowers, color themes, and a host of other things she was all in a dither about.” He kissed her full on the lips in a hurried embrace and headed out the door.

  Questions boiled and bubbled. Why is Matt meeting that woman? Why did he make excuses about working late? Why didn’t I jump up and down and demand an explanation immediately?

  Explanations threw ice cubes into the boiling pot of angst and cooled the worry.

  I trust Matt. He’ll have a good reason. As Rita suggested—all I have to do is ask.

  She headed to bed with the decision to take the time to digest and pray rather than instantly call him. A fitful sleep ensued. She tossed and turned and dreamed of gorgeous Tamara hanging possessively onto to Matt. Numerous times she woke up in a cold sweat.

  The gathering light of sunrise filtered through the cracks in the blind. Anna was thankful she could finally get up. The long night had brought clarity. She would choose to trust God and Matt. This meant she would allow the day to progress as planned and have a conversation that following evening. She would not be one of those women driven by suspicion, who tracked him down or texted nonstop. Anna knew if she started down the road of distrust she’d never be free of that kind of fear, and over time, that would kill their relationship.

  That day peace settled in, and Anna thoroughly enjoyed her evening with Carla planning fun ideas for the wedding. She slept like a baby and entered the new day with joy in her soul.

  Mid-morning her cell rang. She looked at the number but didn’t recognize the caller.

  “Hello?”

  “Anna. I hope you enjoy sharing your fiancé.” A voice of mockery dripped over the line. “We had a fabulous time of it last night. A wonderful meal at Toberta’s, you know that high-class steak house which is just the rave and then …” She paused for effect. “Honey, use your imagination. Just like the good old times, only much hotter … guess you haven’t been keeping him satisfied!”

  Anna hit the end button. She couldn’t listen to another word. Her legs buckled beneath her, and she crumpled in a heap on the couch.

  The reality of the situation rolled over her like a tsunami. Matt had lied to her. Tamara remained in his life and they’d had a rendezvous the previous evening while she foolishly trusted him. Another wave hit and she felt the world, as she knew it, float away.

  Anna was about to be a mother of two infants. She had quit her job because Matt had insisted they had more money than they could spend in a lifetime. She had placed all her eggs in the Matt Carmichael basket only to find Tamara had been correct the whole time, and she was the one so easily duped.

  Anna stifled another yawn. She had not slept the past two nights. The terror of her situation virtually rendered her useless. When Matt called, she made excuses that she was too busy to see him. In reality, she needed the time to process and steel her heart with enough determination to make a clean break.

  Anna had a baby to look after and could not stay in the doldrums though everything within her screamed to curl up in a ball and die. Tentacles of fury reached inside as if to strangle the life right out of her. Anger surged—at Matt—at the all too beautiful Tamara—but mostly at herself for being such a fool to trust so fully. The only smidgeon of good came from the realization she had not yet walked down that aisle. For that small mercy, she was thankful.

  His happy-go-lucky voice sang out as he entered the house without knocking. “Anna, I’m here, where are you?”

  Anna came in from the back porch and sighed heavily. She had never been good at confrontation, but this turn of events demanded action.

  Matt took one look at her face and was instantly at her side. “Anna, what’s wrong?” He placed his hand on her shoulder and tried to pull her close. Anna spun out of this reach.

  “Matt.” A tremble shook her lips. “Did you, or did you not see Tamara on Thursday night?”

  The blood drained out of his face, and he grew deathly white. “Yes, I did, Anna, but I can explain.”

  “Explain? No! I don’t want explanations. I want—no, I need to trust you. You’d better go.”

  “Anna, you can’t be serious.”

  Her words bit back, laced with anger and sadness. “Matt, I’ve had enough sorrow to last a lifetime, and I’m not signing up for more. The wedding is off, and as for that brash, immoral woman—” Her lips trembled, but her voice turned edgy. “As for that despicable woman, she may be inclined to share you, but I’m not.”

  “You spoke to Tamara?”

  “Why, Matt, worried your past—that is clearly not your past—will catch up with you? Well, rest assured it has, and I’m not a player in a game of three.”

  A muscle in his jaw clenched. “So, our relationship means so little to you that you’re going to write me off without an explanation?” He ground his teeth and ran a hand around the back of his neck.

  She fought the sting of tears. She didn’t want to break down in front of him. Sorrow grew out of the pit of her stomach and flowered in her throat as she choked out, “You shouldn’t have been with her for any reason, and worse yet, you shouldn’t have hidden it from me. I saw your phone the other night, and the way you read her message and stuffed it in your pocket right in front of me. Tamara gave me all the explanation I need. I’ll be in touch through a lawyer to set up joint custody of Melody. Please don’t call me.”

  Through a curtain of tears, she walked to the front door and held it open. A canyon of pain registered in his eyes, which she could barely see through the misty veil of her own.

  Pain rose like a banshee cry on the winds as deep guttural sobs worked their way up and out. A groan from his throat unlike any sound he had ever uttered filled his car as tears came in torrents. He drove having to continually swipe at his eyes to clear his blurred vision and arrived home not sure how he got there.

  He fell on his bed and punched his pillow. A spike of anger rode his spine. How could he have been so stupid as to meet with Tamara without telling Anna? Why hadn’t he insisted Anna at least listen to his side of the story?

  A sad truth drove that decision. She didn’t trust him or love him the way he loved her, and it bit like a venomous snake whose poison leaked slowly into his brain. There was no other excuse for the way she had so easily dismissed him.

  In a fit of rage, he lurched his body off the bed and slammed the front door behind him on the way back to his car. He was done waiting … the police had better have an update on the Tamara situation, or he was going to come unglued. She had successfully damaged his most treasured relationship, and it had to end.

  His hands turned white as he gripped the steering wheel in outrage. A
ll the prayer Pastor Harry had suggested he do had done little good, and disappointment ran through to the bone. The more he thought about the situation, the angrier he became. His tires squealed around the corner, which didn’t change a thing, but it sure felt good. Adrenaline roared through his veins as the needle on the speedometer soared.

  Anna didn’t have the energy to call the wedding planner—she assumed since Carla was a friend of Matt’s that he would make the call.

  The next day, Anna opened the door to find Carla sweep in with her arms loaded with bags and a bolt of sheer fabric.

  “Anna, look at this chiffon I found to decorate the head table and hang between the pillars and ceiling.”

  Her voice so chipper and light mocked the sorrow Anna felt.

  Carla dropped the bags on the counter and held up the material with triumph. “What a find. These tiny rosettes are divine and woven right into the—” One look at Anna, with tears streaming down her cheeks, stopped the conversation dead.

  “The wedding’s off, Carla,” Anna gulped between sobs. “I’m sorry, I thought Matt would’ve called you.”

  Carla’s eyes bulged large beneath arched brows. Her mouth flew open forming a perfect circle. “Oh my, no. That can’t be. Why ever would you two break off the engagement? I’ve known Matt since we were kids, and I’ve never seen him so happy or in love.”

  Anna’s chin quivered but she held onto control enough to say one word. “Tamara—”

  Carla dropped everything and wound her arms around Anna in a warm hug. She pulled back and concealed her expression behind a mask of professionalism but not before Anna caught the pity pooled there.

  She gathered up the shopping bags over her arms. “Tamara’s a real piece of work. I’ve known that witch for years now, and all she does is create havoc wherever she goes.”