Tainted Forever

by Terri Anne Browning

  My breath caught when he cupped my pussy through my jeans. “I’m all for what you’re doing right now,” I said with a moan as his thumb pressed down on my clit.

  He grinned against my flesh. “Yeah? Only this?” His lips pressed into my left ear. “Or do you want more?”

  “I want everything you have to give,” I whimpered.

  His head snapped up, the smile gone, the passion banked. “Is it safe? Will we hurt our sweet pea if we have sex?”

  I wrapped my legs around his waist and twisted until he was on his back and I was the one leaning over him. “Jace, you are so freaking adorable right now, it’s killing me. Yes, it’s safe. No, the baby won’t be hurt. Lucy and Harris had sex all the time while she was pregnant.”

  Pink filled his cheeks. “I don’t want that picture in my head. Lucy’s like a sister to me.”

  Laughing, I leaned back so I could pull my shirt off and unclasp my bra. “She’s hot, though. It’s okay that you liked what you saw when you caught them having sex. I would totally fuck her.”

  We both knew I was only teasing him, but the way his cock jerked against the inside of my thigh through our jeans told me he was picturing it.

  “You’re evil, you know that?” He groaned when I rocked against him. “Putting that sh—crap in my head.”

  “Why are you censoring yourself?” I giggled.

  “The baby has ears. Our sweet pea can’t hear that kind of filth.”

  “Aw, babe, you’re so damn cute.”

  His hand slapped against my ass. “Don’t cuss around the baby.”

  “But I like seeing you get so overprotective,” I goaded, a smirk on my lips. “Are you going to be worse if we have a girl?”

  “You’re really killing the mood right now, woman. You want me to make you feel good, or you want to make me crazy thinking about all the little dickheads I’m going to have to murder when they see how beautiful our little girl will be?”

  My pussy tightened, but my heart was melting into a puddle of goo in the middle of my chest. “Thank you,” I whispered.

  His hands caught my hips, holding me in place. “For?”

  “For making everything okay again.” I leaned down to brush my lips over his and stayed there, just holding on to him. “I love you so much.”

  “I love you, Kin.” His arms folded around me, his lips touching the top of my head. “You’re my everything, you know that, right?”

  I closed my eyes. My body was still amped up, but right then, I needed this more. “I do now.”

  Chapter 32

  Kin

  My palms were sweating as I stood backstage with the legends who were supposed to make this first concert easier for me.

  So far, it wasn’t working. I wasn’t calm. I didn’t feel at ease. All I felt like doing was hurling at Shane’s and Wroth’s feet. The little sweet pea was not liking the way my heart was pounding, disrupting its slumber. I tried taking deep breaths, but that didn’t do very much to help ease the roiling in my stomach.

  It was the first stop on the winter tour. The arena was sold out, but I wasn’t expecting all the seats to be filled just for my opening act.

  I should have, though. With the mix-and-match band of legends backing me up, I really should have expected people to be breaking down the doors to get the chance to see members of both Demon’s Wings and OtherWorld live for the first time in years.

  Shane patted me on the back. “You’re going to do great. Just keep breathing. Your music is amazing, but no one expects you to achieve perfection your first time onstage with twenty thousand people watching.”

  Twenty thousand people.

  Oh God.

  “Your pep talk isn’t working,” Jesse said as he pushed his way up between his bandbrother and Wroth.

  When he announced the day before that he was going to be my drummer for the first two weeks, I’d nearly fallen at his feet sobbing. With Carter in Virginia, Jesse Thornton had become my father figure when I first moved to California. Having him put his own life on hold for two weeks to help me with my stage fright wasn’t something I ever would have asked of him. He hadn’t even offered, just informed me he was going with me, and I’d never felt so loved in my entire life as I had in that moment.

  The bald Demon pulled me into a warm hug, and I felt myself begin to relax. “You’re going to be fine. The lights make it nearly impossible to see past the first few rows, so just pretend they’re the only ones out there. If you start feeling panicked, just let Wroth fill the void with a solo.” He leaned back, holding my elbows as he smiled down at me with affection. “You trust us?”

  I nodded, swallowing the knot filling my throat, and smiled. “Yeah. I trust you guys with my life.”

  He kissed the top of my head like I’d seen him do to Lucy a million times, then released me. “If you lose focus, just look at me, Shane, or Wroth. We got you, sweetheart.”

  Feeling better, I let my excitement overrule my nervousness. The baby seemed to appreciate that, because my nausea began to fade. “Okay. I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

  “That’s my girl.” He winked and then pulled his drumsticks from his back pocket. “Kick their ass, Kin.”

  I grinned and followed him out onstage.

  The crowd was deafening when each of the three legends stepped out, and I knew it wouldn’t have mattered if my songs were the worst any of these people had ever heard. I didn’t matter to them…

  Determination began to burn in my veins.

  …but I was going to before my set was over.

  Jace

  I stood to the side of the stage, watching with Kassa as Kin won over the entire arena.

  I’d been there from the moment she’d first stepped out onstage, watching from the sidelines as she had her moment. And just as I knew she would, she put them under her spell the second she started singing the magic she created with her songs.

  Every single one of those people out there had come early to see Jesse Thornton, Shane Stevenson, and Wroth Niall. But by now, those three legends didn’t matter to them. Their full focus was on the redhead who suddenly had all twenty thousand of them eating out of the palm of her hand.

  She was about to sing the last song of her set, and I was the one so nervous I felt like I was going puke at any second.

  “You can do this,” my sister told me as she clutched my hand in hers.

  I gave a stiff nod, not sure I believed her.

  Holding my breath, I tried to calm my racing heart, then took the microphone our tech guy thrust into my hands. The first notes of the song began, and I hesitated, not sure I was confident enough to go through with this.

  Kassa pushed me forward, and I stumbled a step before righting myself and walking out behind Kin.

  My voice singing the first verse of her most popular song had the crowd going crazy, but Kin turned to face me with her mouth gaping open. Her surprise lasted less than a second before she was singing the chorus with me.

  Her face was dripping with sweat from the last thirty minutes of exertion and the lights beating down on her. Her makeup was perfectly in place, though, and I wondered what kind of voodoo she’d had to perform to accomplish that. But she looked beautiful, especially with that glow of adrenaline I was all too familiar with from being onstage with people screaming my name.

  As the song came to an end, she sang the last verse, her body facing the crowded arena, and I gulped down the return of nerves trying to choke me as I dropped to both my knees behind her and fished out the ring I’d been carrying around for months now.

  The crowd was going crazy now, screaming so loud it was fucking with my head, and Kin looked out at them, confused.

  Then she turned and saw me on my knees for her. She covered her mouth with her hand, tears filling her pretty blue eyes.

  She wanted the perfect proposal before she would say yes. I didn’t know if this was the perfection she wanted, but it was all I could come up wi
th. Me, at her feet, offering her everything I had to give. My heart. My soul. My entire life. Everything was laid out for her, right there onstage with the world watching because there were twenty-thousand phones recording every second of this, and it would all end up on YouTube in the next hour.

  Tears choked me as I lifted the microphone to my mouth. “The first time I saw you, I knew you were mine. The first time I walked away, I lost a part of my soul. When I held you again, I knew the perfection of true happiness. And I want that for the rest of my life. Marry me, Kin.”

  Her shoulders began to tremble, and I was ready for her to shake her head, to tell me no, while the crowd was chanting for her to “say yes, say yes, say yes.” This wasn’t enough. It wasn’t what she really wanted. Maybe she didn’t want to marry me at all. Maybe I fucked all that up when I broke her heart. Maybe—

  “Yes!” she screamed into her own microphone as she threw her arms around me and started kissing me.

  My heart suddenly felt like it was exploding with relief and happiness, and I kissed her back. Grinning like a fool, I pulled back long enough to put the ring on her finger, and then I was kissing her again.

  It was only when Wroth nudged me with his foot that I came back to my senses. I stood, taking her with me, and faced the crowd. “Thank God she said yes. I was about to die if she didn’t.” They all screamed in reaction.

  Kin pressed her face into my chest, but I turned her to face the other side of the stage, where Lucy, Angie, Caleb, Carolina, Carter, and Scott were all standing. More tears spilled from her eyes as she screamed in delight and ran over to hug them.

  She wrapped her arms around Angie first, Caleb folding his arms around the both of them. I waved to the crowd and joined them just as Carter was stepping back from hugging Kin.

  Scott stood there, watching, waiting his turn. As soon as Carolina released her, he didn’t hesitate to wrap his daughter in his arms and kiss her cheek. She hugged him back, laughing and crying all at the same time.

  “I didn’t know you guys were coming tonight,” she said, wiping her eyes.

  “We wouldn’t miss your first live show,” Lucy told her, wrapping her arms around her for the second time but not letting go this time. “You were so good out there, babe. I’m so proud of you.”

  “But you were all so busy. And Lucy, you have Hayat to think about.”

  Lucy put her hand over her best friend’s mouth. “Harris has her back at the hotel. She’s fine. I wasn’t going to miss this. Especially when Jace told us he was proposing tonight.”

  Kin’s gaze met mine, and I stepped in beside her as the roadies started clearing away her things to prep for the Blonde Bombshells’ set. “You arranged for them all to be here to see you propose?”

  I lifted a shoulder in a half shrug, not letting her see just how scared I’d been. “I knew you would want them to be here.”

  “What if I’d said no?” she whispered, her eyes huge with wonder.

  “I had faith that you would give me a yes,” I lied, and I knew she understood.

  I’d put everything on the line tonight. She could have said no and walked away, and I still would have gotten up and followed after her, still would have tried again. And again. And again.

  “I love you,” she cried.

  “Baby, I love you too.”

  Epilogue

  Kin

  Three years later

  I adjusted the bride’s veil and then picked up the bouquet of flowers her groom had pushed into my hands earlier to give to her.

  Beside her, Riley was making last-minute adjustments to Amara’s makeup, wanting to make sure she was perfect before her best friend had to walk down the aisle to marry her besotted husband-to-be.

  In her adorable little flower girl dress, their daughter, Charlotte, was dancing around, showing everyone just how prettily her skirt floated around her legs. “Look at me, Auntie Kin! Look at this!”

  I crouched down in front of her, a beaming smile on my lips. “You are gorgeous. Are you ready to show Daddy your dress?”

  She nodded, her dark-blond hair swinging over her shoulder. “Can I? Please, Mommy?”

  Amara grinned down at her. “Go on. Give Daddy a kiss for me, okay?”

  Clapping her hands with excitement, Charlotte ran to the door, and I hurried after her. Across the hall was the groom’s room, and she was already knocking on the door. Caleb opened the door, his eyes skimming over me and then his goddaughter before stepping back.

  “Daddy! Daddy!” Charlotte squealed as she raced into the room, twirling the whole way. “Look at my pretty dress.”

  Cash swooped down and scooped her up, kissing her cheek until she giggled for him to release her. “You look so beautiful, I might cry, Charlotte bug.”

  Setting her on her feet, he straightened, and I was surprised to see not a single ounce of nerves on his handsome face. “You look nice,” he commented, adjusting his tie so it was perfect once again. “Everything okay with my bride?”

  I shook my head. “She’s screaming she changed her mind and is about to run out on you any second. But she said you can keep the kid.”

  His skin paled, and I realized he’d just been putting on a brave face. I hugged him quickly. “I’m kidding. Amara is practically dancing with excitement. She’s so ready to marry you, she’s yelling at the clock to hurry up so she can do it already.”

  He clutched at his chest. “You scared the crap out of me, Kin.”

  Laughing, I stepped back, offering my hand to Charlotte. “Give Daddy one more kiss, and tell him you’ll see him at the altar.”

  She threw her arms around Cash’s leg, then waved up at Caleb. “See you soon, Daddy!”

  Back in the bridal room, Angie and Carolina had joined the party, making the room crowded, with Santana and Roanna already sitting with Kassa on one of the long couches.

  “Mommy, Daddy looks so, so, so handsome,” Charlotte told her mother as she started dancing around again, showing the two newcomers just how pretty her dress was. “Can we go marry him now?”

  “Soon, baby girl. Soon.”

  A knock on the door was the only warning before Aunt Emmie stuck her head in. “Are you ready? It’s about that time.”

  Amara’s hands shook as she took her bouquet in one hand and Charlotte’s hand in the other. “Is he already out there?” she whispered.

  Aunt Emmie nodded, her smile full of motherly affection as she skimmed her eyes over Amara in her wedding dress. “And he’s shaking like a leaf. But he looks good.”

  Riley and I stayed behind while the others rushed to take their seats with everyone else. This wedding was considerably smaller than my own had been, but almost every pew was overflowing in this tiny chapel.

  Jace had pulled out all the stops with ours, and I was glad Aunt Emmie hadn’t pulled any of the crap she’d done while planning Lucy’s wedding, because I’d needed her help with the entire thing. A girl needed a mother figure the day she said “I do,” and I’d missed mine so badly that day. But Aunt Emmie, Alicia, and even Shannon had stepped up to the plate to make the grief of not having Abby with me that day bearable.

  It had been a magical day, with both Carter and Scott walking me down the aisle. There hadn’t been an empty seat in the entire church that held two thousand. Of course, I’d had a baby bump at the time, but that didn’t seem to matter to anyone, least of all Jace, who’d looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing he’d ever set eyes on.

  Charlotte held my hand as we both walked down the aisle together, while behind me, Riley walked in front of the bride.

  As we walked, and the toddler threw flowers along the path while we passed rock legends Charlotte only knew as her uncles, my gaze caught Jace’s halfway up the aisle. His eyes scanned hungrily over me before winking, and I had to refrain from fanning my hot face at the hunger I’d seen in his blue eyes.

  Beside him, Kassa was holding her newborn baby girl, while Gray kept their
toddler son on his shoulders. But my gaze skipped over the family of four to land on Alicia. Her hair was only just now starting to get long again. She’d lost all of it during her yearlong battle and the powerful chemo treatments. But she hadn’t had to go through any of it alone.

  After the winter tour, Alicia finally confessed everything to Kassa and Gray, and they bought a house just a few blocks away from her. Jace and I had moved out there until her treatment was over too, living in her house and giving her all the support she would allow us to give her while she fought and won against the brain tumor that tried to steal her from us.

  In Alicia’s arms was my sleeping daughter. Abigail was a heavy sleeper, just like her father, but that was the only thing she got from Jace. Everything else, from her red hair and the shade of her blue eyes, all the way to her personality, was one hundred percent me. And Jace was just as much a slave to her as he was to me.

  Abi adored Alicia, and even though we lived in California again since Alicia had been in remission, the two were still close.

  As I passed them, my eyes landed on the other members of Tainted Knights. Kale stood with Santana, Angie and Jenna right behind them in the pew. The ring on Santana’s hand was so big, it nearly blinded me as it caught the light, and I hid my grin.

  Santana had said over and over again she never wanted to get married, but after my wedding, she’d proposed to Kale. She even had a ring, but he’d surprised her by producing one of his own and sliding it onto her finger even before she’d finished asking him to marry her.

  They hadn’t done the whole church wedding but had flown out to Hawaii and gotten married on the beach alone. We’d all been surprised when they came back with glowing tans and wedding rings on their fingers.

  On the other side the aisle, Sin stood with Roanna and the other Blondes. I joked that he was their daddy now, and he always rolled his eyes, but he never told me to fuck off, so he probably considered himself their father figure. He’d sure acted like a papa bear when London had been dating Derrick and then when Genesis started dating the guitarist in my band. And God forbid Aubree ever found someone to have a relationship with, because he was the most protective of her.