Knight's Absolution (Knights of Hell Book 5)

by Sherilee Gray

  Gunner was afraid to move.

  When Luna finished feeding, she’d kept hold of his arm, hugging it to her. Eventually, though, she’d rolled in her sleep so she was facing him. Her face was pressed against his chest, one arm up between them, the other over his waist. She was holding him tight as if she were afraid he’d get up and leave.

  That wasn’t going to happen.

  His cock throbbed, but he ignored it. Wanting to fuck your mate as soon as you found them was a given, but that was the last thing she needed from him.

  He bit back another growl; he’d been doing it all night. The realization that Azel, that twisted, motherfucking angel—who had murdered Luna’s mother, then abducted her and her brother for their powers—had used her like that, had made her think she had to give him her body in exchange for blood, made him want to roar and tear shit to pieces, preferably that fucker’s limbs from his body.

  His beautiful, precious female had been through hell. She was so strong, stronger than anyone he knew. Christ, the shit she’d survived. But there was this vulnerability, an innocence, an insecurity that she couldn’t conceal.

  Most people—demons, angels, demi—built walls, shields, using anger or sarcasm or humor as a defense mechanism. Luna didn’t have that. He guessed that’s what came from being so removed from the world. Every emotion she felt was written all over her face.

  There was no hiding, no pretense.

  She fascinated him more with every moment he spent with her. God, he wanted to protect and take care of her so badly he vibrated from the need of it.

  She made a little whimpering sound in her sleep and pressed closer. Gunner held her tighter in return. Luna was petite and curvy, and right now her soft, round hips and breasts were plastered against him. He glanced down at her, and his mouth literally watered from the desperate need to taste her skin, her lips—shit, every inch of her sweet little body.

  The fact that he had to take this slow was torture. It also soothed him, because he would do anything for his female. If he had to walk around with blue balls for months, fucking years, if that’s what it took for her to accept him, he would.

  With another sweet little sound, she bent her knee, her thigh moving up over his hip. Jesus fucking Christ. He could feel the heat of her pussy, could smell her heady scent. She was…fuck, she was turned on right then. He’d bet his incredibly hard, aching dick, she was wet.

  He groaned under his breath. What if she never wants you back?

  And, of course, now he desperately wanted to know what she was thinking about to make her body react like that. Who was she thinking about? Did she actually want Azel? Was it more than his blood she craved?

  Grinding his teeth, he sucked in a sharp breath through his nose. No, no fucking way did she have feelings for that sick fuck. All he could do was hope that her reaction was from being so close to her male. That being pressed up against him this way was having the same effect on her as it was on him.

  Luna stilled in his arms.

  She was awake.

  Her head tilted back, her gaze sliding up to his.

  “Hey,” he said, his voice sounding utterly wrecked.

  She licked her lips and looked away, at his chest, his shoulders, his arms. “I-I’m sorry…I’m not sure how I…” She tried to move away.

  Gunner held her firm. “It’s fine.”

  She blinked up at him in that slow way of hers, and Gunner got caught up in the vibrant color of her eyes. They were brighter, darker after feeding, and so pretty he couldn’t look away.

  “I don’t usually move in my sleep, I’m not sure how I—”

  “I like you close like this. Close to me.”

  Her brow scrunched. “You do?”

  She was all sleepy and warm, her face soft, lips puffy. Christ, he wanted to kiss her. “Yes.”

  “But last night when I offered to—”

  “Do you like it when I hold you, love?” He didn’t want her thinking about that, getting it all twisted in her head.

  She stilled, and her hand resting against his back moved, gliding over his skin. His demon purred, and he couldn’t stop his own shudder from the pleasure of it.

  Another slow blink. “You like it, don’t you, when I touch you like this?”

  “Yes,” he said. He wasn’t going to push her for more, he meant that, but he wasn’t going to lie either. She didn’t fully understand how relationships worked. Azel had only taken from her. Vampires were known for their lack of emotions, for being cold and distant. Luna was half vampire, add in being at the mercy of that sick fucking angel, and her confusion made sense. “You’re soft and smooth, and your skin is warm after feeding from me. I like the way you feel pressed up against me.”

  “That’s why you wanted to hold me as payment?” she asked, frowning. “Because you like hugs?”

  He wanted to smile and cry at the same time at her confusion. “First answer my question. Do you like it when I hold you like this?”

  Her eyes kind of glazed over, as if she was assessing her own body’s response. “I…I do, yes.” Surprise flittered over her features. “I feel warm as well, and your body…it’s hard and muscled. You feel…strong. I like…” Her hand slid over his side and around to his stomach, gliding up his chest, resting over the angel brand there. “Yeah, I definitely like the way you feel pressed up against me as well.”

  Jesus, she was killing him. He cleared his throat, so damn rough with lust, he was surprised he still had a voice at all. “That’s why I asked to hold you. Hugs make us both feel good.”

  Her eyes narrowed.

  He knew what she was thinking almost instantly. The whole payment-for-feeding-her thing. She was worried the balance was off. That he was still giving too much. Christ. “And when you feed from me, we both enjoy that as well. Knowing I’m giving you what you need pleases me more than you know. So we’re more than even.”

  “Why would that please you?” she asked, her hands now both getting in on that act, moving over his body, exploring, driving him crazy.

  “Because I care about you, Luna. And when you care about someone, making them feel good makes you feel good as well.”

  She shook her head, still looking confused as hell. “You have zero reason to care about me, Gunner. After everything I’ve done…”

  “You did nothing wrong,” he said with a bit more growl behind it than he’d intended. “And emotions and feelings don’t always make sense. I feel the way I do; does there need to be an explanation behind it?”

  This was probably the right time to tell her she was his mate, but he finally felt as if he might possibly be getting through to her. Telling her the mate stuff would definitely freak her out.

  She shook her head, her silky black hair moving like liquid silk. “No, I guess not.” She pressed closer, surprising him, her hands still moving over his skin. “I care about you as well. I’m not sure why, but I do.”

  And there it was, that innocence, that vulnerability right there on display.

  “I’m glad, love. That makes me incredibly fucking happy.”

  She smiled as well, flashing the tips of her little fangs, and his heart thumped harder.

  “I never knew hugs felt so nice,” she said.

  He slowly moved his hands over her back, massaging lightly, trying to give her pleasure while making sure she knew he wasn’t asking for anything else.

  “Who do you usually hug?” she asked into his chest.

  No one. He never hugged any-damn-one. “I don’t usually do a lot of hugging,” he said, sticking to the truth. “I’ve seen my brothers do it with their mates, and I liked the look of it.”

  “I don’t remember being hugged before I was taken. And not at all since. But I’ve seen it on TV. It feels better than I imagined.”

  “For me too.” He rubbed her back and asked what he’d been wanting to since she woke up in his bed. “Feelings, emotions, they’re new to you, aren’t they?”

  “Yeah,” she said softly. “I m
ean, the first time I started to feel something was about a year ago, but only anger. Anger, I know well. Though, thinking back, when Grace helped me kill Greg, there was more going on inside me. I was extremely angry, I know that much, but there was something else as well, maybe fear, sadness?”

  A year ago was when she got her powers, when he felt her, then lost her. “You didn’t feel anything good during that time? Just recently?”

  Her finger began tracing the brand on his chest. “Just recently, but I guess I didn’t have any reason to feel any of the good ones.”

  The until now went unsaid. Now she had a reason to feel the good ones. Fuck, yeah, that pleased the hell out of him and destroyed him at the same time. “How are you feeling right now, love?”

  She smiled sweetly. “I’m warm, and my skin feels sensitive, but in a good way. Does yours?”

  “Yeah, it does,” he said, fighting to control…shit, everything, his breathing, his pulse, his hands, his cock.

  She pressed closer still. “And my belly, it’s all swirly and tingly. Is yours doing that as well?”

  Fuck me. She was literally going to kill him. “Yeah, I got some of that going on as well.”

  She sighed happily. “I really like it.”

  He leaned in and pressed his lips to her forehead, unable to stop himself. “Me too.”

  “I’ve been a little all over that place, haven’t I?”

  He’d most definitely noticed. She breathed him in, and his balls tightened.

  “That’s only to be expected, everything’s still so new.”

  Her fingers traced patterns on his chest. “I guess being emotionally and physically shut down for so long will do that. It’s confusing as hell, Gunner. Up until a year ago, the only things I felt were hunger and pain. I didn’t know I was capable of feeling anything else.”

  He tried not to freeze, tried not to react in a way that would upset her, and made his body stay relaxed as he rubbed her back. “You won’t feel either of those things ever again, love. I’ll make sure of it.”

  Azel was going to die screaming.

  Chapter 13

  Hell

  Scarlet winced as she ran her healing rag as gently as possible over the other female’s back.

  Scarlet.

  The name Tobias had chosen for her was pretty. She’d been so long without one. They called her drudge, the demons and Diemos. She didn’t know why Tobias was in chains here, what he’d done, but she found herself thinking about him more and more often.

  The female beside her hissed.

  “I’m so sorry,” Scarlet whispered as she dipped her rag in the small bowl at her hip.

  “I’m fine,” the female said through gritted teeth.

  Diemos himself had sent for Scarlet to tend her, and not for the first time. The small, fragile-looking female belonged to their king. Though going by how often he punished her, she obviously didn’t want to belong to Diemos. Not surprising. Who would?

  He never allowed her to leave his quarters either. No, she wasn’t locked in one of the cells like Tobias, at the mercy of demons, but this was still a prison. And if this wasn’t torture, Scarlet didn’t know what was.

  A shiver slid through her as she looked around the king's chambers. There was a glossy black stone bed, the mattress covered in deep blue silks, and a large charred wooden chest sat at the end of it. A few other dark wood pieces of furniture were scattered around—a desk, a couch with blue silk cushions—but what made her shudder with revelation was the glistening dark walls. They looked like glossy obsidian, but when Scarlet had taken a closer look, it was blood that made the stone shine, blood running down the walls from the cells above.

  “Would you like me to help you to the bathroom?” Scarlet asked, another task she’d done several times when the female had been too weak to walk on her own.

  The other female shook her head. “He told me not to move.”

  Scarlet’s heart ached for her, but there was nothing she could do. The king would do terrible things to both of them if they went against him. The way he obsessed over the small female, watched her, controlled her, was unsettling.

  She eased her rag over the female’s abused skin again and thought about Tobias, the way he’d asked for her name every single day she’d tended him—how she’d felt the day he’d given her one of her own.

  Did this female know her name? Would having one of her own help her the way it had helped Scarlet? She found now she stood a little taller. And for once no demon guard was listening or watching their every move. Or worse Taren, Diemos’s right hand, who was always close by. The male was almost as terrifying as Diemos himself.

  “What is your name?” Scarlet asked.

  The female stared at the wall for several long moments. Finally, she blinked, and a single tear slid down her cheek.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you…I just thought…”

  “Kyler,” she said huskily. “My name is Kyler.”

  “That’s such a lovely name. I’m Scarlet.”

  “It feels…so long since I’ve said it out loud, since someone has called me by it,” Kyler said, her gaze so incredibly hollow.

  Scarlet carried on tending Kyler’s wounds. “Is there something I can do to help you?”

  Kyler shook her head. “Nothing that wouldn’t get you killed or tortured for eternity.”

  “There must be something? The way he treats you… I know the passageways, the cells, deep hidden places barely anyone goes. I could hide you.”

  Kyler remained completely still, only her eyes moving. “As soon as I left this room, they’d be on us. He’d tear Hell apart to find me. I’m too important.” She huffed out a humorless breath. “If I moved a finger right now, he’d know. And he'd return. Then you’d need to come back to do this all over again tomorrow.”

  Oh god, she literally wasn’t permitted to move.

  “Kyler…”

  The door opened, and Scarlet shot to her feet as Diemos strode in, tall and pale and utterly terrifying. His yellow eyes locked on Scarlet, and fear so strong her lips trembled spiked through her. Then his gaze slid to Kyler, at her almost fully healed back. “Ah, almost as good as new, my darling,” he said in a voice that grated down Scarlet’s spine.

  Kyler’s gaze became so impossibly empty it hurt to look at her.

  Diemos glanced back at Scarlet. “Leave, drudge, you have work to do elsewhere.”

  It took a second to unfreeze, to make herself move.

  Diemos walked to the bed as Scarlet rushed to open the door.

  “I hate it when we fight, my precious one,” he said to Kyler. “But making up is always so much fun.”

  Scarlet had to bite back her sob. Leaving Kyler there felt wrong in every possible way, but what could she do? Diemos was their king. They couldn’t win. If she tried to help her, Scarlet would end up dead, and Kyler would endure even more torture. That wouldn’t help either of them. For now, she could do more by being there for the other female when she needed her.

  Kyler’s muffled cry of rage hit Scarlet as she pulled the door shut after her.

  Shaking, Scarlet rushed away.

  Hours later, she was still rattled when she finally reached Tobias’s cell. There were a lot of other cells she’d had to stop at first, and all the pain and suffering was more than she knew how to deal with. She’d tried to remain numb to it. It helped her get through each day, but with every moment she spent with Tobias, it got harder. And today, after talking to Kyler, she was more than struggling.

  She walked into Tobias’s cell, the male who had started to not only fill her head during the day but her dreams as well, and a sob broke free.

  “No,” she whispered. “What have they done to you?”

  Blood coated his chin, his chest, dripping down his bare legs. His big, muscular body was torn and sliced, bite marks in his flesh. But the blood, there was so much blood pooling at his feet.

  He tried to smile, he always smiled no matter his condition, his
pain. “I-I’m okay.”

  Seeing him like this, it…hurt. Her ability to switch off from what she was seeing every single day was failing her. But this male, seeing him like this, it was so much more, it hurt like she was the one bleeding all over the floor. How could that be?

  She rushed forward. Her sympathy and pain wasn’t helping him right now.

  Looking up at him, she forced herself to smile as well. “I’m going to take care of you,” she whispered, then as gently as she could, she began the long process of cleaning and healing his wounds.

  And while she did, she kept her head down to hide the tears burning hotly down her cheeks, because tomorrow they would hurt him again. They would cut and bite and tear at his beautiful, strong body until he was bleeding all over again.

  Chapter 14

  Luna’s small room was crowded.

  Eve, Meredith, Grace, and Mia had all stopped by. Eve and Meredith were sitting on her bed, and Grace and Mia were on the small couch in the corner. They were talking and laughing, and Luna wasn’t exactly sure why they were here. Why they’d want to be?

  She’d been at the compound for close to a week, and all the females had been kind and welcoming. They were demi as well, all with their own powers. Grace could draw another demi’s powers into herself and use them as her own, like the demi Sir had used to take Ronan’s powers. Eve could get in people’s heads and retrieve information, and according to Gunner, was strong enough to kill a demon with her mind. Mia’s power was fire, and Meredith was an amplifier, which meant she could help boost another demi’s powers, increasing them to devastating proportions.

  All so different. Unique.

  Honestly, it made Luna feel less of a freak.

  They’d shared openly, and though they hadn’t pressed her to do the same, Luna had found herself explaining the way her blocking power worked before she knew that she was going to.

  She’d started to feel…at ease around them. She liked the other females, but she wasn’t sure why they wanted to spend time with her.

  They all smiled at her, and they seemed to enjoy helping her order more clothes online—even if she hadn’t liked using Gunner’s money to do it. He’d insisted, of course.