One Hella Lucky Goddess (The Midlife Goddess)

by Tee, Marian

  Mr. Shy gaped at me. "You're thirty-eight?"

  "Forty-two," Mary Priscilla clarified with a snicker. "She's actually in her forties now, which is so old—-"

  I cleared my throat loudly to drown her voice out. "Anyway..." I gave Mr. Shy my most dazzling smile and felt gratified when the boy appeared properly dazzled. "About that, um, Get High. Is it like some special type of musical, and that's why everyone's in a rush to watch it?"

  "I guess you can describe it as special," Mr. Shy allowed. "It's the only play that's specially prepared for ghosts like us, and this year's even more special. Yan Wang is this year's special guest—-"

  Mary Priscilla and I turned to look at each other.

  Did Mr. Shy just say...Yan Wang?

  JUST AS MR. SHY TOLD us, the Chinese Lord of the Underworld was seated alone in the front row, and because he was in my realm this time, it felt a little surreal to see Yan Wang in full vivid color. His military uniform, which I had imagined earlier as something black, was apparently navy blue, and surprisingly enough, this was also the same shade of his long, silky hair, which was currently combed back in a half-ponytail.

  The ghostly bodyguard Mary Priscilla and I had approached earlier bowed to Yan Wang before speaking, and a few moments later Yan Wang came to his feet and motioned for us to approach him.

  The ghosts around us started whispering as Mary Priscilla and I came forward.

  "Uh..." I forgot what I had to say as our gazes collided, and I realized to my shock that Yan Wang's eyes were the same unusual shade of silver as my husband's.

  "My soldier says you expressed an urgent need to speak to me."

  The words brought me back to my senses, and seeing him glance at Mary Priscilla, I hastily introduced the little girl as my handmaiden before asking if I could speak with him in private.

  "This is private enough."

  "Um..." Two hundred or so ghosts were seated right behind him, and all of them were gawking at us like I was some fangirl who managed to win a date with her celebrity crush. Maybe our realms had different standards for privacy?

  "Everyone here has sworn their allegiance to my name. None of them will dare speak a word about anything they hear."

  It was as if Yan Wang had read my mind, and while I did appreciate the words of reassurance...just because someone was loyal to him didn't mean that same person would be loyal to me, you know?

  "If it means anything," Yan Wang murmured, "then I give you my word that the one who placed a death curse in your name is not among the ghosts you see here."

  I couldn't help fidgeting at how the death god was saying all the right words. Could he really read minds then? I truly did hope so because otherwise—-

  Ahem!

  Mary Priscilla's deliberately coughing made me wince. Shit. I got distracted again obviously, and I could only wince anew when I saw the impatience in the death god's eyes.

  "I do not have much time to waste, woman. Speak now of this urgent need of yours."

  "Oh, um, right." I launched into a detailed explanation of my legal predicament, and Yan Wang was frowning by the time I finished telling him about the possible consequences I had to face if I were to lose the case.

  "Do you understand what you are asking here?"

  "A roundtrip ticket to your realm, hopefully free of charge?" The words were out before I realized what I was saying, and while a part of me was already expecting him to groan just like Mary Priscilla was doing—-

  Whoa.

  Was I seeing things or did the death god's lips just twitch?

  I glanced at Mary Priscilla, and the sour look on her face pretty much confirmed it.

  Well, well, well.

  The brat often talked shit about my supposedly poor taste in jokes, but she was so obviously wrong if I could make a god like Yan Wang—-

  "Do you agree then?"

  Shit.

  Since I could feel Mary Priscilla's annoyingly judgmental gaze boring through me, I just couldn't make myself admit that I hadn't heard a single word Yan Wang had said. I mean...if I did, then I might as well admit I was easily distracted, and...nope.

  A girl's gotta have some pride, you know?

  And so I heard myself say, "Yes, I agree."

  I heard Mary Priscilla gasp.

  Oh shit.

  Did I just agree to something I wasn't supposed to then?

  I quickly turned to Yan Wang. "Um—-"

  But it was too late, with the death god suddenly grabbing my hand and the girl's, and a second later both of us were screaming in pain just as the colors around us slowly started to fade.

  Oh...shit.

  We're fucked.

  Chapter Ten

  "So this was what you meant about being in black and white." Mary Priscilla's stunned voice snapped me out of my shock, and I looked down to see the little girl staring at her hands just like I had once done.

  I glanced down at my own hand, and it was only then I realized with a start that I had my coin back. Did this mean—-

  Mary Priscilla suddenly flew up, and I found myself stumbling a step back when I saw the way she was glaring at me. "What?"

  "I can't believe you said yes to this!"

  "Well..."

  "Only an idiot would agree to having their death curse resurrected!"

  So that was why I had my coin back.

  "And because I'm your handmaiden, it automatically means I must suffer the same fate as well!"

  Oh. I smiled weakly. "Um...about that."

  The little girl's glare intensified.

  "I kinda...didn't...um...hear a thing that Yan Wang said?"

  "Saoirse!"

  Mary Priscilla groaned like my stupidity was about to kill her, and I said defensively, "Surely you know me better than to think I'd ever let you come here with me!"

  "Neither of us should be here!"

  I shook my head in stubborn rejection of her words. "Now that I disagree with. I need to be here because this is the only way—-"

  "Do you even know what you've signed ourselves up for?" the little girl demanded.

  "Well, there's that bit you mentioned about my death curse being resurrected..."

  "And that's it?"

  "Sorta?"

  Mary Priscilla clasped her hands behind her back, and I told myself that she wasn't doing it because she was trying to resist the temptation of twisting my neck.

  A moment later, the little girl started to speak—-

  To find the one who placed a death curse in your name is to turn back time.

  And that was when I realized she was impersonating the death god while quoting his words verbatim.

  But when the death curse is resurrected, it shall be ten times stronger, and the shadows' hunger for your life energy shall know no bounds.

  I started to speak, but the little girl raised her hand in a halting gesture that was so like the death god I had to fight back a smile.

  They shall strike when you least expect it, and no longer will it be a battle of strength. The purity of your heart shall also be tested, and to fail is to meet your end...for all eternity.

  Mary Priscilla floated back down, and as soon as her feet touched the ground, she planted her arms on her waist and scowled up at me. "Do you get it now?"

  "Nope."

  "SAOIRSE!"

  "Did you get it?" I challenged. "Like really, completely get it?"

  "Well..." The little girl grimaced. "Not completely."

  "See? That's what I'm talking about." I started pacing absently as I contemplated the death god's words. The first time I came here, the shadows had converged on me right away, and - according to Hadrian - the only reason they hadn't been able to kill me was because the curse was only strong enough to kill humans.

  This time, however...

  Yan Wang had warned us about the curse being ten times stronger. Did that make the curse strong enough to kill a goddess? And what about the part where the so-called purity of my heart would also be tested? Like...exactly what k
ind of purity were we talking about here? I mean, my mind kinda loved being in the gutter sometimes, and probably more times than Hadrian's ever did, too. Dirty thoughts were just—-

  "Stop getting distracted!"

  The horrible brat had yelled the words right at my face, and although her shrill voice had my ears ringing painfully, she did get her point across, and I gave myself a quick mental shake.

  Focus like a LOTUS, Saoirse!

  I got Little Iron out of my pocket and gave it a nip of my blood before letting the magical partridge have a sniff of my newly minted curse coin.

  "So..." I waited until I had Little Iron's full question before making my request. "I'm looking for the one who placed the death curse in my name this time. Do you think you can find that person for me?"

  Little Iron gave a quick bob of its metallic head...and then off we went, with the partridge taking us deep into this city that still reminded me of Paranormal Hong Kong with its empty streets and decrepit-looking buildings.

  When Little Iron finally came to a stop and perched itself on my shoulder, Mary Priscilla and I found ourselves in front of what seemed like an automated tram. Its engine was running noisily, but there was no driver in sight.

  Mary Priscilla pointed to the tram's revolving door, and that was when I saw the fare charges painted on its glass pane.

  3 coins per person

  Gold and Silver accepted

  I glanced at Little Iron. "Is there any way you can help us find more coins?"

  The bird shook its head.

  Shit.

  Mary Priscilla gnawed on her lip. "What do we do now?"

  "Give me a moment to think." A part of me was already waiting for the kid to say something annoying (and false) about my intellect again, but when Mary Priscilla actually did give me a moment, it was then I realized how secretly frightened the kid was about all of this, and—-

  Now is not the time to panic, Saoirse!

  I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. Surely there was something we could do here. A way for us to either find or even earn...oh!

  MARY PRISCILLA LOOKED confused and incredulous at the same time when she realized I had brought her to what was more or less a casino, even though the only game the ghosts played here was mahjong.

  "You want us to gamble for coins?" she asked finally.

  "We have to work with what we've got," I told her, "so..." My voice trailed off as I pushed the door open, and we found ourselves stepping inside...an empty mahjong hall.

  Shit.

  "The last time I was here," I said uneasily, "there were lots of ghosts flying around."

  "Maybe they've moved to another floor?"

  "Maybe."

  I didn't really believe it though, and the way Mary Priscilla just nodded told me she didn't believe it either.

  All of the mahjong tables we walked past were empty, and it was only when we made it to the second floor that we found another ghost: a woman selling what seemed like an assortment of trinkets, and all of it were neatly laid out on the table in front of her.

  The woman smiled when she saw us approaching. "Hello."

  "Um...hi."

  "May I help you with anything?"

  I started to ask her about the empty mahjong tables when something caught my eye. A silver framed portrait of a pearl, and I couldn't keep myself from slowly reaching for it.

  "That is an ancient painting," the woman murmured.

  "Is this pearl real?"

  The woman looked at me in surprise. "You do not recognize it?"

  I shook my head.

  "It is the pearl of Gong de Tian."

  Since the memories of how I previously butchered other foreign terms and names were still fresh in my mind, I knew better this time than to simply repeat what the woman said.

  "Could you spell that please?"

  Mary Priscilla snickered at hearing my question but I told myself I should just ignore her because that was how a wise LOTUS rolled.

  "It's G O N G D E T I A N."

  "And how do you pronounce it again?"

  "Gong De Tian."

  I repeated it back, and the woman smiled. "Perfect."

  "Thank you, and um...who exactly is Gong De Tian?"

  The woman looked amazed. "You are not even from this realm, are you?"

  "No, sorry," I admitted sheepishly.

  "Gong de Tian is - well, was - the Heavenly Goddess of Luck."

  I glanced at Mary Priscilla. "Maybe I should tell Persephone I'm a goddess of luck. It could put an end to all of her complaints about my deus ex machina moments."

  The kid looked at me thoughtfully. "It would make sense, you know. If you were a goddess of luck. But the heavenly part..."

  "Oh, shut up." I looked back at the woman. "Do you mind if I ask another question?"

  "By all means."

  "Why do you refer to her in the past tense? Aren't goddesses in this realm immortal?"

  "Hers was a special case," the woman answered. "As the Heavenly Goddess of Luck, the one and only thing she must not ever do was to force her luck."

  "But she obviously did."

  "Yes," the woman said sadly, "and she paid for it with her life."

  "Oh." I glanced down at the painting. "What about this pearl?"

  "It is a pearl that's able to grant wishes. Gong De Tian used it to share her luck with other people."

  "What happened to it when Gong De Tian died?"

  "The pearl goes where Gong de Tian goes, and since Gong de Tian has died a thousand years ago, it hasn't been seen again." She smiled at me hopefully. "I can see how interested you are in the painting. Perhaps you would like to purchase it?"

  "Um...well..." I knew it was a long shot, but I thought I should ask anyway. "Do you take American Express?"

  Mary Priscilla groaned, and I saw the woman glance at the kid in visible concern. "Is she alright?"

  "Ignore her," I advised like always. "She's been moody since the 1960s."

  The brat rolled her eyes. "That's not even the slightest bit funny."

  I looked at the woman tellingly. "See what I mean? Moody, right?"

  The woman's lips twitched. "What I see is a great relationship between mother and daughter—-"

  Both Mary Priscilla and I started gagging at the same time.

  "I'm not her mom, yuck!"

  "I'm not her kid, ew!"

  "Sisters then?"

  "We're not blood related in any way," I told the woman as I returned the painting to her.

  The woman appeared disappointed. "You do not want to buy it?"

  "I wish I could, but the thing is..."

  The woman listened attentively as I told her about the current state of my finances.

  "The mahjong tables are only open during weekdays," she explained, "and since today is Sunday..."

  Shit.

  "Is there any other way we could earn coins here?" I asked hopefully.

  "There is a way, but...you two are obviously new here."

  "We are," I admitted.

  "Then I don't suppose you're aware of how karma works in this place?"

  I looked at her blankly. "Isn't karma like...you do something good, something equally good happens, and vice versa?"

  "Exactly," the woman affirmed cheerfully. "If you go around, you'll eventually find a soul that would require help. If you succeed in helping that person, you earn gold coins of good karma. If, on the other hand, you deliberately do something bad, you will earn silver coins of bad karma."

  "Do gold coins weigh more than silver coins?"

  "Oh no. They are of the same value. The only difference is that the other ghosts would know what you did to earn those coins."

  MARY PRISCILLA AND I were exhausted. Since my plan to gamble for coins was a total fail, the only recourse we had left was to follow the tram's trail...on foot. We had been walking for hours since then, and a part of me was worried that we might not make it back in time for my hearing. Actually...if I were honest, I was worried that we might no
t even make it back at all, and—-

  Finally!

  Mary Priscilla and I had reached the end of the trail, and looming in front of us was a pair of towering temple gates that looked eerily familiar.

  When the doors suddenly started creaking noisily as they slowly swung open on its own, I instinctively grabbed Mary Priscilla's hand and forced her to stand behind me. I had a feeling something big was about to happen...

  And I was right.

  The gates had finally opened, and for one moment all I could do was stare in shock. "You."

  "Me." Yan Wang's tone was calm. "And so now..."

  There wasn't even the slightest bit of warning.

  Shadows simply came out of nowhere.

  Countless hungry mindless shadows.

  And they were all coming for me.

  I pushed Mary Priscilla to the ground and covered her with my body.

  The swarm of shadows swirled closer.

  And closer.

  And closer.

  And...

  Nothing?

  I slowly opened my eyes...and my heart nearly stopped beating.

  The shadows.

  All those shadows...

  Countless hungry mindless shadows...

  They were still around me.

  And they were all on their knees as if they, too, recognized me as...

  LOTUS.

  Chapter Eleven

  Only three minutes were left until the hearing was to officially start, and by now the whispers coming from the public benches had reached a crescendo. Unlike the previous meeting between the two opposing parties, today's trial was open to all those who wished to attend—-

  And attend everyone certainly did.

  For the Lord of the Underworld to come up above ground was a rare enough sight, but to witness Hades and the former Lady of the Underworld reunite was a scene that no one would have even considered possible in the past. It was no secret that Persephone had fought tooth and nail to keep her divorce from being finalized, and no one had any doubts that Persephone, if given the chance, would remarry Hades in a heartbeat.

  But for that to happen, the god would have to give up his new Lady of the Underworld, and if rumors were to be believed, well...