Intense - Aspen Drake & Emily Cain

by Special Forces - Operation Alpha

  I didn’t want to leave his chalet in the snow. I didn’t want to rejoin the real world. Life was full of pain and disappointment. Even the people closest to us betrayed us. It was hard to know who could really be trusted. My mother trusted my father and look where that got her.

  Parker’s arms wrapped around me, and he pulled me closer to his side. “It’ll be okay, Sierra. I know that sounds hard to believe right now, but it will.”

  With just his simple words and touches, Parker healed a part of me. The second we met, I knew something was brewing beneath the surface. It was so strong it scared me. That kind of connection was more powerful than anything I’d ever felt before. And with great power comes great danger. I tried to evade him, but that wasn’t meant to be. For either of us.

  Now we’d spent so much time together locked away in a winter wonderland, that I couldn’t imagine my life any other way. For a moment, I thought he was evil, an enemy. But then he turned out to be the greatest hero I’d ever known. My heart was wrapped around his finger so tightly, the string was about to break.

  Parker was a wounded soul with a broken heart—just like me. But deep down inside, he was still the same man he used to be. He had the ability to love and forgive…as soon as he allowed himself to.

  We were connected in a way both of us understood. He couldn’t deny it anymore, and I didn’t bother trying. Just being with him numbed the pain. We chased each other’s nightmares away like we were destined to take care of each other.

  And maybe the connection we had to each other would change the world.

  Parker gave me more time to recuperate from my heartbreak. Instead of putting me back to work and digging in to my training, he allowed me to relax. He would leave early in the morning for work, and by the time he came back, I was just opening my eyes.

  There were times when we went outside and walked around the village or had a snowball fight. Other times, we’d watch movies and try to guess the endings. And sometimes, we wouldn’t do anything at all. We would stay in bed and read or make love as if we were the last two people left on earth. I suspected it was the only time in his life he actually kicked back and relaxed.

  I lay on my side and stared out the window with the sheets up to my shoulder. Parker lay behind me, his iPad resting against his extended knee.

  “Sweetheart?” His quiet voice fell on my ears like gentle snow.

  The nickname made my heart skip every time I heard it. “Yes?”

  “I’m not trying to be insensitive, but we need to get back to work. You still have a lot to learn.”

  I knew this fantasy wouldn’t last forever. “Okay.”

  He turned to me with his eyebrows raised, surprised I was giving in so easily. “Okay, then. We’ll start tomorrow.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  He set his iPad on the nightstand next to his phone then got out of bed. “I’m going to shower before dinner.”

  “Okay.” I turned over so I could watch his ass as he walked. No matter how many times I touched it, I still wanted to sink my teeth into it.

  I lay flat on my back and looked at the place where he’d been laying just seconds ago. His imprint was still on the sheets, and they smelled like him too. I ran my hand across it, trying to absorb some of his essence.

  That’s when his phone vibrated on the nightstand.

  I’d spent a lot of time with Parker, and he never carried around a phone. Obviously, he had one, but he rarely kept it out and visible.

  The screen lit up and there was a text message on it. I didn’t mean to read it, but I couldn’t help glancing at the preview.

  Come tomorrow night. It was from someone named Jessica.

  The second I read the words, I felt sick to my stomach. Parker and I had been hibernating for months, and I forgot about the outside world. It was easy to think it was just him and I, but I had to face the reality that it wasn’t. We shared the same bed every night, and his arms were wrapped around me in a protective cocoon. But maybe that didn’t change anything as far as he was concerned.

  We finished sparring and weight lifting before lunch then we sat against the back wall where a few computers were located. My forehead was shiny from sweat, and my muscles screamed with pain. Taking the past two weeks off set my body’s strength and stamina back a few months.

  Parker opened a folder and pushed it toward me. Inside was a picture of a bald man with glasses. He wasn’t bald due to age, but because he shaved. He looked like he might be in his early forties.

  I glanced at it then looked up at Parker. “Uh, who is this?”

  “Do you recognize him?”

  “No.” I’d never seen that man in my life.

  “Are you sure?” Parker implored me to come up with a memory that didn’t exist.

  “Yes. Believe me, I would remember if I saw a creepy guy like that.”

  He pointed to the man’s face and covered up his head so only his eyes and lower face were visible. “Look again.”

  I held back the urge to roll my eyes and did as he asked. Nothing changed. There was no recognition or familiarity. “Parker, I’ve never seen him before.”

  He sighed in disappointment. “Are you sure you’ve never seen this guy?”

  “No. Parker, I didn’t spy on my dad. I assumed he was a CIA agent or something noble. I wasn’t suspicious of terrorist activity. I wish I could be more helpful, but I simply can’t.”

  He clutched the folder in his hands. “Sierra, you’re my only lead. I had him in my grasp out of sheer luck. I’m not going to get so lucky a second time.”

  I wanted to stop my father more than anything. He deserved to be thrown in a cell to serve the rest of his life behind bars, and not just because he murdered my mom. He killed so many others. A man like him shouldn’t walk free. “I can go back to the house and search it.”

  “He’s long gone. He’s a professional.” Parker shook his head. “He wouldn’t leave even a fingerprint.”

  My body deflated in sadness. “Would it hurt just to make sure?”

  “I’m not letting you go back there. It’s too dangerous.”

  “How is it dangerous?” I asked. “Why would he hang around the one place he knows you’ll look for him?”

  “He won’t. But he’ll have someone else watching the house. Sierra, you’re his enemy now. He’ll be searching for you.”

  The idea that my own father might try to hurt me was horrifying.

  His expression didn’t change, but he didn’t seem to like what I said. “You’ve only scratched the surface. There’s so much more to this job than you are aware of. As we dig deeper, we’ll see if you feel the same way.”

  I already knew how I felt. “I will.”

  He looked down and grabbed the folders. “Time will tell.”

  Parker didn’t come downstairs for dinner. He went to his room to shower, but never returned.

  I kept thinking about that text message I saw, the one from Jessica. It was a clear invitation to a booty call. It hurt me to think he was still fucking around when he had me in his bed every night. I didn’t want to share him with anyone.

  He came downstairs in jeans and a nice jacket. He was going out.

  My heart fell into the pit of my stomach. Bile rose back into my mouth and I had to swallow it down. Jealousy and pain washed through me.

  “Dinner?” Jana asked from the kitchen.

  “No, thank you,” he said politely. “I’m going out. But make me a plate for when I get back.”

  Jana didn’t ask where he was going. She probably already knew. “Okay, honey.”

  I avoided his gaze and picked at my food, unable to look at him.

  Parker grabbed his wallet from the counter, just feet away from me. I could feel his eyes on me, but I ignored him. “Everything all right?”

  How could he ask me a question like that? How could he sleep with me every night then run off with some skank the second she texted him? Why would he want something meaningless when we could have something gre
at? “I’m fine.”

  Parker watched me for another moment before he walked to the door. His footsteps sounded on the hardwood floor. Anger bubbled inside me with every step he took, and I wanted to blow like a volcano.

  He walked out and shut the door behind him.

  I grabbed the steak with my bare hand and chucked it across the room at the window. It splattered on the glass and slid down to the floor. Jana stood stark still as she realized what I’d done to her precious meal.

  I excused myself from the table without apologizing to Jana. I was livid and out of my mind. My heart had been left vulnerable, and Parker stabbed it the second my walls were down.

  As painful as it was to admit, I loved that man and he obviously didn’t feel the same way about me.

  Chapter 14

  During our training session, I released all the anger that had been building up for the previous twenty-four hours.

  Parker hopped around me on the mat, both of his fists near his face. Just as he stepped to his left, I nailed him right in the nose. I threw all my weight into the jab and hit him as hard as I could. I wanted to break his face since he broke my heart.

  His nose immediately began to bleed, and he danced out of the way without showing even the slightest amount of pain. There was obvious surprise in his eyes since I’d never attacked him so viciously.

  We definitely had bad blood.

  I didn’t let up, going after his face once again. Parker was stronger and had more experience, but I had speed on my side. My instincts were sharp, and I could quickly get out of the way of anything he threw at me. I waited until he tried to punch me then deflected it hard against his side. With his face unguarded, I punched him in the lip, making it bleed too.

  He immediately stepped back, surprised I landed another hit so quickly. “What’s gotten into you today?”

  I shrugged and went for him again. “Just really focused.”

  “I like it.”

  That just pissed me off even more. My anger was at an all-time high, so I tripped him. Once he was on the ground, I pulled his arm in a deadlock and pressed his face into the mat. “Do you like this?” I applied more pressure.

  He didn’t show any sign of discomfort. “I love it.”

  I released a sigh that sounded more like a scream then stormed off. Taking my anger out on him had accomplished nothing. Now I didn’t want to look at him anymore. I just wanted to barricade myself in my room until I was forced to face him again. Perhaps this would be easier if we were at the agency and other people were around. I wouldn’t be stuck with him all damn day, and I could have some space.

  “Sierra, what’s the problem?” He got to his feet then walked to me, his nose and lip still bleeding.

  “There’s no problem. You got your ass kicked by a girl. That’s all.”

  “I’ve wanted you to kick my ass for a long time. So, why today?”

  I grabbed my jacket then shoved my arms through it. “No reason. Bye.” I walked to the staircase.

  When he spoke next, he didn’t sound like himself. His voice radiated authority and was laced with a shadow of a threat. The power in his voice made me stop in my tracks. “Get your ass back here. Now.”

  I counted to three to keep from exploding. “I’m done for the day.”

  He didn’t raise his voice, but it was somehow worse than if he yelled. “You aren’t done until I say you’re done. So, get your ass back here and don’t make me ask you again.”

  Afraid my emotions might get the better of me, I stayed put.

  “Sierra.” He threatened me again with just my name.

  I turned around, feeling no remorse for his beat-up face.

  “What the hell is your problem? You’ve been throwing a hissy fit all day.”

  “I don’t have a problem.”

  “Horseshit,” he said. “Yes, you do. If you have a problem with me, you better tell me.”

  It was pointless to say anything, but I wanted to scream anyway. “Had a good time with Jessica last night?”

  He didn’t react at all. His face stayed exactly the same, not showing guilt or remorse.

  “Did you think about me when you fucked her?”

  He moved his hands to his hips and slowly stepped toward me, not blinking once. “How do you know about Jessica?”

  “What does it matter?” I snapped.

  “You’re going through my stuff now?” His voice was lower than it was a moment ago, but it felt more deadly as it vibrated through my body. “That’s the kind of person you are? Snooping through my phone like it’s any of your damn business.” His eyes started to glow like a blazing fire. “Are you a bratty teenager? Are you a controlling girlfriend? Maybe you need a reality check, Sierra. I’m not your goddamn husband. If you can’t trust me, then we can never work together. It’s that simple.”

  “Why should I trust you?” I wanted to punch him again, but I knew I’d just hurt my hand more than his face. “Everything’s a secret with you.”

  He worked his jaw like he was trying not to scream. “Keep acting like a child if you want, but don’t expect me to stoop to your level. I offered you a job because I thought you were fit for the task. But the more I spend time with you, the more I realize how unprofessional you are. You clearly don’t know what it’s like to be an adult. You don’t always get your way. And when you don’t, that doesn’t give you the right to throw a tantrum.” He gave me a final glare before he walked around me. “You need to decide what you want, Sierra. I’m done playing games.”

  The rest of the week dragged on slowly, and when we weren’t training, we weren’t speaking. He stayed in his room, and I stayed in mine. Neither one of us ate at the dinner table. Jana was probably lonely without any company, but I didn’t know how to get over my feelings.

  By the seventh day, I started to reconsider everything that happened. Despite the way I felt, I knew I did some things I shouldn’t have. When it came to Parker, I was blind. I couldn’t see straight, and my emotions guided me crazy directions.

  It was almost ten in the evening when I knocked on his door, but I knew he would still be awake because he usually didn’t fall asleep until midnight.

  “Come in.” His tone was clipped, and he didn’t sound as sweet as he did when he spoke to Jana.

  He knew it was me.

  I stepped inside and saw him sitting on the couch. His back was to me, and he faced the window. “What do you need?” he asked without turning around.

  I walked past the fireplace until I reached the couch.

  He didn’t look up at me, his eyes locked on his iPad.

  “Do you have a minute?”

  “I guess.” He sighed but put down the iPad then looked at me.

  I eyed the couch before I sat down. There were a few feet of space between us, and I didn’t get any closer to him than necessary. “I want to apologize…”

  He didn’t blink.

  “I shouldn’t have looked at your phone. That was wrong. But I want you to know that the phone lit up with a text message. I read it, but I didn’t actually touch your phone…if that makes any difference.”

  He blew out a long breath and kept his gaze on me.

  “But I shouldn’t have read it to begin with, and even though I did read it, I shouldn’t have assumed the worst. I should trust you, or at least ask questions instead of making accusations. I’ve never been like this my entire life, honestly.”

  He watched me carefully, and the man I knew so well started to come back.

  “You know how I feel about you…” I didn’t want to get into it and confess everything in my heart, but I didn’t want to hide my feelings either. “I’ve grown more attached to you over the last few weeks and…I feel something I’ve never felt before. And I swear, you feel it too. I know I’m not crazy.”

  His eyes softened.

  “Anyway… I’m sorry for my behavior. It won’t happen again. I do trust that you’ll be honest with me when you need to be. And if I have any questions, I’l
l ask them.”

  He smirked and raised an eyebrow. “So, let’s hear them.”

  “Hear what?” I’d already said everything I could say. What else did he want?

  “Your questions. You obviously have some, so let ‘em rip.”

  I bit my lip and wondered where to start. “Did you sleep with Jessica?”

  He reached for my hand and held it on his knee. “No, I didn’t. She’s an informant. She had some intel she needed to share in person.”

  My cheeks burned with humiliation for the way I attacked him, but I was so damn relieved by his answer, I didn’t even let myself feel bad. “Oh, I see.”

  Parker cleared his throat. “Anything else?”

  I watched his thumb draw circles on my palm as I gathered up the courage to just say the words I’d been holding in for weeks. “Do you feel for me the way I feel for you?”

  “I think I do, Sierra.” He tugged on my arm so I was closer to him. “I haven’t wanted to admit it to you or myself, but it’s stupid to keep fighting it.”

  My heart skipped a beat.

  “I don’t have sleepovers with women. I don’t spend all my time with one person. I don’t cuddle. That’s not me. But I do those things with you…because you do mean something to me.”

  I wanted him to keep going. I wanted this to be the start of something more. “Will you be mad if I say I love you?”

  He leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine in a soft kiss. “No, sweetheart, because I love you too.”

  Chapter 15

  I was having the best dream when Parker woke me up.

  “Sierra, listen to me.” He was hovering over me as my eyes struggled to adjust in the dim moonlight.

  “What?” I rubbed my eyes. “What’s wrong?”

  “I’m leaving. I wanted to say goodbye before I left.”

  “Leaving?” I pulled the hair out of my face and sat up. “Where are you going?”