Onyx: Forever

by J. S. Lee

  “Well, if Jiwon doesn’t drown him, at least we won’t have to worry about JongB renting any cars tonight,” Sungmin said, dryly.

  제7 장

  Thinking of You

  I slept for most of the journey between LAX and Incheon. Normally, I didn’t get much sleep on planes as there was usually too much noise and distractions – even when we were treated to seats you could almost lay down in. This flight was a night flight, which probably helped, but I couldn’t get over the fact I was just feeling tired all the time.

  This was where I wanted my mom to be present. Was this because of being pregnant? Was this because I was actually getting ill? Did I need to worry? Did my mom go through this? How was her pregnancy?

  Of my friends, I seemed to be the first one to get pregnant, so it wasn’t like I had anyone else to ask.

  I was mulling over calling Holly while we went through the farce of getting home. We’d had to take two minibuses back to Atlantis, where the team dispersed back to their own apartments. I’d gotten into a car with only my luggage, and been dropped off at the house, while the others had gone to the dorms.

  Much as I’d wanted them with me, they’d been given instructions to go back to the dorm and stay there before their final show tomorrow.

  I dragged my cases into the house, grateful that it was single story and I didn’t have to get them upstairs. It was nearly ten in the morning. One advantage to sleeping for most of the flight was that I didn’t have jet-lag and I was wide-awake for the time zone.

  The disadvantage was that I was wide awake for the time zone, and all alone in a big house. I’d spent months with Onyx, rarely getting much time to myself, and now I was feeling too alone.

  I wandered into the kitchen and examined the contents of the fridge. Someone had been in the house while we were away, because the place was spotless and there was no out of date food in the fridge. Unfortunately, there were no fresh groceries in there.

  Grocery shopping was something I could do to occupy some time. I quickly jotted down a grocery list, then, after getting changed into some clean clothes and freshening up, I left the house, walking down the street.

  Holly had found us a place in an exclusive part of Seoul. Our house, like most on the street, was hidden behind high walls, and so far, no one seemed to know Onyx lived there. It was why we were going to so much trouble to have them go to the dorms.

  There was a supermarket at the bottom of the hill. Seoul was hilly. I’d never really thought much about the geography of the city before I’d first come out here, but as there was a river running through the center of it, I guess I’d assumed it was pretty flat. It wasn’t.

  At all.

  By the time I’d gotten the groceries back – and I hadn’t bought that much – I was tired. If this was what I was going to be in for, for another seven or so months, I wasn’t impressed.

  I dumped the groceries on the side and lifted my shirt, looking down at my belly. It was a strange sensation, because I couldn’t really feel anything in there, and visibly, it didn’t look like there was anything in there. I mean, the thing was probably the size of a thumb.

  With a frown, I whipped out my phone and did a quick search.

  A pea.

  It was the size of a pea.

  Never mind a thumb, it was more like the thumb nail. “OK, Baby Onyx,” I grumbled. “You can’t be making me feel this tired when you’re that small,” I told my stomach.

  I dropped the shirt as my stomach grumbled at me. Not Baby Onyx talking back to me, but my own body reminding me that it was lunch time. I’d bought some pasta while I was at the grocery store, and that was exactly what I was in the mood for.

  Turning the music player on my phone on, I started putting the rest of the groceries away as the water boiled. I was happily making a meal I’d eaten a lot of at college – pasta, tuna fish, corn, and mayonnaise – while shaking my butt to the music, when I felt the hairs stand up on the back of my neck.

  “What on earth is in that pan?”

  I whirled around, the sloppy mixture flying off my spoon and sailing across the kitchen to hit Sungmin’s shoulder. It hit him with a splat, splashing up onto his chin.

  I stared at him, my heart pounding. “What are you doing here?”

  Sungmin was standing very still, looking down at the splodge of mainly tuna and mayonnaise on his shoulder. “Kate… Is that vomit?”

  I blinked several times. “Yes,” I said, deadpan. “Because I love to whip up a bowl of vomit for lunch.”

  Sungmin turned green.

  “It’s tuna and mayonnaise,” I quickly assured him, snatching up a towel from the side and hurrying over to wipe him down. He stood there, unmoving, a grimace on his face. “It’s not vomit,” I told him. I stepped back, all the food off him, at least, as best as I could.

  “Kate, this stinks.” He held the back of his hand over his nose.

  “It’s tuna,” I pointed out. “And you’ve eaten a lot of sushi, so it can’t be that bad of a smell.”

  “Fresh tuna doesn’t smell like this. Has this gone bad?”

  I stared at him in disbelief. Surely, he’d had tuna out of a tin before?

  Sungmin looked down at his shoulder. With the tips of his finger and thumb, he pulled his shirt up and pulled a face. “No, this is revolting.”

  Before I knew what he was doing, he was pulling the shirt off. With it scrunched up in one hand, he looked at me like I had chosen to eat something out of the trash. “I can still smell it. I’m going for a shower.”

  If I wasn’t completely distracted by the fact Sungmin had a six-pack, I would have told him to man up, and the reason he could still smell it was because my lunch was ready to be dished up three feet away from him. But I didn’t, because I was distracted by his abs.

  Damn.

  I shook my head, the effort completely unnoticed by Sungmin as he turned and hurried out of the kitchen. Why was I staring at Sungmin’s abs? I had enough six packs for a frat party’s beer-pong championships with the other members of Onyx.

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. That wasn’t fair behavior.

  The smell of my pasta called me back to the kitchen. It might have turned Sungmin’s stomach, but I was suddenly reminded of how hungry I was. I didn’t even bother with a bowl, instead, just grabbing a fork and the tea towel. Instead of eating inside, I walked through the house to the doors at the back to decking.

  I’d devoured about a third of it before Sungmin appeared, freshly showered, and now wearing a polo shirt and a pair of jeans.

  It was still weird to see Sungmin in jeans…

  He kept away from me, like I was going to throw what was left of the contents at him.

  As if I was going to waste precious food.

  “It won’t bite,” I told him, calmly.

  “I’m staying downwind,” Sungmin told me, eyeing me suspiciously. “Is this a strange pregnancy craving?”

  I looked at the contents of the pan before looking over at him. “This? Are you serious? No.” I shook my head. “This is the meal which got me through my finals – when I was in Chicago and not Japan.”

  “I’m fairly certain my cat threw up something like that once.”

  The fork hovered between the pan and the bowl. “You have a cat?”

  “He lives with my parents, in Daegu. I didn’t want to bring him to Seoul when I was never going to be in the apartment.”

  I was willing to put money on his cat being one of those British Shorthairs.

  “Not that I’m not happy to have company, but why are you here?” I asked him. “I know everyone seems to think I’ve turned into this fragile doll, but I’m capable of looking after myself.”

  “I have nowhere else to go,” Sungmin said, quietly.

  I’d forgotten about that.

  The last time we’d been in Seoul, he was supposed to be getting married, and then he’d been abandoned at the altar because of his injuries. Sungmin had moved out of the apartment he’d
shared with his fiancée and moved in with us for a few weeks. Then we’d gone straight on tour again. All of his things were still in the spare bedroom.

  “Of course you can stay.” I wasn’t sure if he’d had a discussion with the others. I knew they wouldn’t have objected – even if he was their manager.

  I finished my pasta and stood, walking back towards the door. Sungmin moved out of my way like he was Superman and I was carrying kryptonite. I waited until I was back in the kitchen and out of his sight before sniffing the pan. It wasn’t that bad, was it?

  Just in case, I put it in the sink and filled it with soapy water before grabbing a coke from the refrigerator. I popped the can open and walked back outside.

  I got through the door, and then Sungmin was in front of me, snatching the can out of my hands. “No.”

  My mouth fell open. “Give me back my Coke!” I reached up, trying to snatch it back.

  Sungmin, several inches taller than me, held it high out of my reach. “No. You can’t drink this.”

  I dropped my arms, glowering at him. He might have the height advantage, but I had the maknae line advantage: I was so used to one of them stealing something from me and holding it out of my way, that I knew two ways to handle this.

  The first one was the JongB way: Pinch his nipples.

  Knowing my audience, that wasn’t going to work well.

  I went for the second option.

  I turned around and dropped straight into a crouch, wrapping my arms around my legs as I dipped my head to my knees. “Kate?!” Sungmin cried in alarm.

  I sensed him move in front of me, dropping down to my level. My hand shot out to grab the can, snatching it easily from the unsuspecting man.

  “Ha!” I cried, standing and quickly turning so that I could take a sip. The next thing I knew, Sungmin was pressed up against my back, trying to get the can from me. I reached out as far as I could, keeping the can just out of reach. “Not going to happen.”

  “That’s what you think,” Sungmin tutted in my ear. He wrapped his arms around me, using them to clamp mine to my sides.

  “I can still drink this,” I laughed, raising my hand and doing just that.

  “Kate!”

  I laughed again. “It’s decaf,” I pointed out, holding the can up so that he could see it. “I’m being a good momma and I’m staying away from the caffeine, although I don’t think one little can is going to hurt me.”

  “It’s not just caffeine in them,” Sungmin told me.

  “I didn’t want it,” I responded. “Baby Gem wanted it.”

  “Gem?” he repeated, sounding confused.

  At some point, I’d decided Baby Onyx wasn’t a good name for the little pea inside me. But an onyx, was technically a gem, and that sounded a lot closer to the precious thing it was. Of course, I had no idea what ‘Baby Gem’ was in Korean. “I don’t know what the baby is, so I’m calling it Baby Gem.”

  “Studies have shown that children whose mothers had soda when pregnant had poorer nonverbal problem-solving abilities and verbal memory, along with lower global intelligence scores associated with verbal knowledge and non-verbal skills.”

  I was beginning to wonder if my mom had consumed gallons of soda when she had been pregnant with me…

  I wasn’t completely sure I was following what he had said properly, because there were big Korean words in there, but the gist was, soda equals bad.

  With a sigh, I lowered the can. “Fine, no more soda.” I expected Sungmin to release me, but he didn’t. I bit my lip, holding my breath. This felt… I didn’t want to say right, but it didn’t feel wrong either. And it should have done.

  Maybe I was imagining it? This was still just Sungmin trying to stop me from drinking a soda, right?

  Who was I kidding?

  I’d been picking up on something from him for a while now, and although I hadn’t put a name to it, I knew what it was.

  I closed my eyes. “Sungmin?” I muttered, not wanting to startle him.

  Sungmin instantly released me, grabbing the can. “No more soda,” he said, before walking back into the house.

  I watched him go, feeling cold now that he wasn’t there.

  Shit.

  제8 장

  Simon Dominic

  “Fuck me, that man is beautiful,” I sighed, staring at the television.

  I could feel six sets of eyes on me, and I turned, looking around the room and found Onyx looking at me like I had said something blasphemous.

  “Excuse me?” Youngbin asked.

  I pointed at the television. “Simon. Simon Dominic.” Youngbin continued to stare me out. I didn't blink. “D. O. M. I. N. I. C. Oh. Oh.” I continued, deadpan.

  “I am well aware of who Simon Dominic is and how you spell his name,” Youngbin returned, dryly.

  “Then you are also well aware that he is beautiful.”

  “I mean, she's got a point, hyung,” Xiao chimed in.

  I flashed him a grateful smile before turning back to Youngbin. “See, Xiao gets it.”

  “He's short.”

  “We're all the same height lying down,” I pointed out.

  “Get Simon Dominic out of your filthy mind right this second,” Youngbin growled at me through gritted teeth.

  “What if I said you were there too?” I asked, blinking innocently.

  There was the briefest pause. “I am NOT bringing Simon Dominic into this dynamic.”

  “Shame,” I pouted, watching the music video.

  It was the day after Onyx’s last show of their world tour, and they were officially on a break. Sungmin had arranged for the six of them to get back to the house, and we had twenty-four hours together before they would have to start regularly swapping between the house and the dorm.

  Despite having constantly spending all our time together for nearly all that time away, they were in no hurry to disappear to their rooms and have some alone time. And neither was I.

  It was nice to be able to just ‘be’. We were all in casual clothes… well, Xiao was wearing only a pair of shorts (not that I was complaining). There was plenty of fruit and popcorn on the coffee table, and I had a vast selection of fruit juices in the refrigerator to choose from.

  At some point between confiscating my can and dropping Onyx off at the house, Sungmin had done his research, discovered what I could and couldn’t eat, and had gone grocery shopping to make sure only the good things were in the house.

  I’d bitten my tongue and stayed quiet as I knew he was only trying to be helpful, but there was no rule to say I couldn’t have some junk food every once in a while.

  I snuggled up into Jiwon. There was something satisfying about doing that, mainly because he wasn’t really a cuddly person with anyone other than me, even though he would pretend he didn’t like it unless we were alone. We’d all decided to sit together and watch a movie, but as no one could agree on what we were going to watch, I had taken control of the remote and put some music videos on in the background. Two hours later, we were still watching them.

  “Oh, now this group have a lot of good-looking members in it,” I said, giving Youngbin a side-eye.

  He caught me staring and tilted his head. “Good luck getting around their no-dating clause,” he scoffed.

  “That sounds like a challenge,” I grinned.

  I was rewarded with a sharp slap on my ass by Jiwon. “Behave.”

  “For the love of god, do not make me deal with dating rumors with another company.”

  I whipped my head around, finding both Sungmin and Holly standing behind me. Onyx seemed to leap to their feet like there was a sharp current running through the couches. “When did you get here?”

  “About the time you decided that NCT 127 was hot, which, you’re not wrong, but no,” Holly said, rolling her eyes as she walked over. She looked at the guys and frowned. “You can sit. It’s fine.”

  The six of them did as she said, but none of them relaxed back into their seats like they had been before they r
ealized she was there. Their respect was rather endearing, even if it was amusing to see Holly being treated like that.

  “Whaddup, dude?” I asked her, earning a disapproving noise from behind me. I turned and found Sungmin staring at me. He could disapprove all he wanted, this was my bestie, and I called her dude – mainly because she was really strait-laced and not the ‘dude’ type at all.

  “Sadly, I’m not here for a social call,” Holly said, making me look back to her. “I know it’s only the early days of your pregnancy, but there’s a lot we need to discuss about what’s happening next with you and Onyx.”

  “You’re not going to disband the group up, are you?” I asked.

  Holly’s expression went blank. “Why is it, everyone’s first question is about whether I’m disbanding their group?”

  “Because one of six of them got me pregnant?” I offered. “And we know how fans will react to that?”

  “If I’d have known I was going to be running an entertainment company when I graduated college, I’d have picked a different major,” Holly muttered under her breath. She closed her eyes, shook her head, and then, when she opened them, looked like the focused Holly I knew. “The way I see it, there are three options, and while one of them is probably not going to end well, it’s still your collective decision to make.”

  “What’s that?” Youngbin asked, warily.

  “Hyung, she said it wasn’t going to end well,” JongB said, although he might as well have added a ‘duh’ to the end of that statement.

  “It’s still an option, so we should hear it,” Youngbin told him.

  “The truth,” Holly shrugged.

  “Next,” Jiwon grunted.

  “We get it,” Xiao said, indicating to the people in the room. “And I think there will be some people out there who get it too, but most won’t.”

  CX nodded his agreement. “It’s not like saying one of us is dating; this is going to be life altering for us.”

  Holly breathed out a long breath, nodding. “Good. I’m not one for lying, but I think in this instance, withholding the truth is a better option. I am all for change and making things better for my artists, but I’ve run a dozen scenarios on this, and telling the truth, while an option for you, is a terrible one.”