by Kim Smart
“Some folks in Buffalo Ridge say Stella bit off more than she could chew and called home to get her brother to help. That girl always was too big for her britches.” And yet, despite the gossip, deep within Susan felt envy.
Kerry was quiet. She hadn’t heard. She hadn’t reached out to Jesse since that day in May when he dumped her. Kerry finally read his book and wanted to talk to him, in person, about the things he had written. Beautiful, profound things that touched Kerry’s heart.
Kerry quickly changed the subject. “Well, of course I want to go to the pie social and the cakewalk. Those church ladies know how to throw a party.” In a small town like Buffalo Ridge, the church ladies are the social committee. “I would love to see Mr. Walker. Do you want to go to the Christmas concert with me?”
Kerry needed to dig into all the activities to avoid thinking about Jesse, who had been on her mind a lot since she decided to come home for the holidays. A dull gnawing started in her stomach when she learned he wouldn’t be there, but for her parent’s sake she would make the best of it.
The holiday activities exhausted Kerry. She and her mom baked cookies for the assisted living home, wrapped angel presents for the church, and hit every sale and bazaar in town. They took a day to have mani-pedi’s at the local salon and chatted with the women there, catching up on all the town gossip.
“Have you been out to see Cathy yet?” the nail artist, Shelly, asked. “She’s big as a house. Looks like she’s having twins, but she swears there’s only one in there.”
Boy, Kerry felt out of touch. She hadn’t been on Facebook for months and had called no one but her parents all year. Texts went unread and unanswered. She felt like a real looser of a friend.
“I had no idea they were expecting. How exciting for them,” Kerry responded. “That was fast. Seems like just yesterday they got married.”
“Right!” A familiar voice came from around the corner. Whitney peeked her head around and squealed. She rushed to Kerry, who pulled away from the manicurist and jumped from the chair to give Whitney a big squeeze.
Whitney had just stopped in to pick up a gift certificate for her mom and had to rush off. “On my lunch break,” she quipped. “The Diner is calling.”
They promised to catch up the day after Christmas, before Kerry left for school again. She had to get back to manage the lab. They were expecting shipments of new supplies for the next semester and she needed the extra money. When Professor Duncan asked her to work the week before New Year’s, it was an easy decision.
Kerry skipped the Buffalo Ridge Ranch events. There was no need to look backwards, she thought to herself. She saw the Davies family at the Christmas Eve church service and waved from a distance but avoided them afterwards. She went home with her parents to enjoy their traditional chili dinner before opening one gift from under the tree. It felt great to be grounded and at home with her parents, even if only for a little while.
Before she went to bed, she sent off a text message to Jesse. Merry Christmas (emoji Christmas tree with heart ornaments).
When she didn’t hear back from Jesse by the end of Christmas Day, Kerry felt sad. Was she so awful that he couldn’t even wish her a Merry Christmas? She looked around her room and decided there was nothing more she needed to pack. She was ready to move on and leave all this behind her. For good. She would visit her parents, of course, but this town was too small. There were too many memories she needed to break free from.
The next morning after breakfast, she loaded presents and belongings into her car and hugged her parents goodbye. She had already spent time with Prince and Gypsy (who was showing her age) telling the faithful horse, “Here girl, here’s a carrot for you. You hang out until the spring flowers rise and I will come back to see you.” She completely forgot about her promise to visit Whitney.
As she drove away, she passed the Buffalo Ridge Ranch, sitting atop the bluff overlooking the Badlands on one side and Buffalo Ridge town on the other. Postcard perfect, she thought. A dream from the past.
By the time she got to the lab the following day there were boxes piled outside the door. She looked forward to keeping busy over the next week, organizing the lab and getting herself ready for the next year. She shook her head. Her unanswered text to Jesse was a sign that she needed to move on.
Gracie returned to Brookstone on New Year’s Eve. She had a gymnastics meet early in the new year and the coach had scheduled practices over the holiday break. “The team is having a New Year’s Eve party. There’ll be no alcohol, no dancing, and no sweets. If you want to come, you can be my plus one.”
“Gee, sounds like quite a blast! Think I’ll stay home and read my syllabi for next semester and eat Christmas cookies.”
“Right, that will be a lot more fun. Really, we get dressed up and drink sparkling cider. There will be confetti at midnight, lots of loud music and pizza. What’ve you got to lose?”
“My self respect.” Kerry laughed with her friend. Gracie went to the closet and tossed a cute dress out to Kerry. “Here, hot stuff. Put this on. We’re leaving at 8.”
The party was a lot of fun and, on the plus side, there was no hangover the next day. There were about fifty people in the condo complex clubhouse of the community where the gymnastics coach lived in. The New York New Year’s ball drop was on the big screen. Board games were set up on tables on the periphery of the room. They had decorated to the rafters with neon-colored streamers, disco balls, and strobe lights. A huge boom box blaring 80s music sat on the kitchenette counter.
“This place looks like they preserved it from the 80s,” Kerry commented when they first walked in.
“Yeah. This is the coach’s one big bash every year. She and her husband do all the decorating and cleanup. Apparently, they got engaged, or met or something on New Year’s Eve and so it’s become their thing.” Kerry knew that Gracie loved her coach. Gracie described her as caring about the whole person not just the athlete. Kerry saw this when Gracie struggled early on, being far from her family, especially her brother Gabe. Coach and her husband included Gracie in some of their own family’s activities and that helped Gracie through the rough spot. She went fishing and hiking with them and to several dinners at their home.
“Come on, there’s an escape room game over there. Let’s show ‘em how it’s done.” Gracie and Kerry joined in the fun going from game to game all night. As the final countdown got closer, the whole room was up dancing. Kerry found herself dancing with a good-looking guy with dark hair, mysterious deep brown eyes and a tight body. Clearly he spent a lot of time at the gym. She had met him, along with about fifty other people, earlier in the evening. Mac came as a plus one with his sister, Jill, who was on the team. He had driven Jill back to school from Minnesota where he attended college.
Mac danced closer and closer to Kerry until he had his arm around her. At the strike of midnight, she raised her glass to toast this good-looking hunk of a guy. He leaned in and, without warning, planted a warm, luscious kiss on her unsuspecting lips. She let him linger a moment and pulled back to catch her breath.
“Um. Hello. I’m Kerry.” She reached her hand out to shake his. He laughed.
“Yeah, I know. Your friend Gracie told me all about you. I’m Mac. Here with my sister Jill.” He nodded toward a lean sandy-haired girl in the crowd.
“Oh yeah. Sorry, we met earlier. You just — um — took me by surprise.”
“Sorry about that. I just like a memorable celebration. How about you?”
“Well, I will definitely remember this one. You’re lucky I didn’t reach up and slap you.” Kerry gave a half-hearted laugh. He was lucky. Kerry liked her personal space and didn’t give it up freely.
“Is that right? Well, thanks for not slapping me and I hope you have a wonderful New Year. And, that lip gloss is mighty tasty.” Mac smiled that kill-them-with-kindness smile he had perfected and gave Kerry a light tap on her upper arm. “Forgiven?”
Mac didn’t care if she forgave him or not but
didn’t want to leave any bad marks behind for his sister.
“Forgiven.” Feeling awkward and out of place, Kerry excused herself and wound her way through to crowd, away from Mac, to find Gracie.
“Hey, you ready to go? I’m done with this scene.” Kerry had an edge to her voice unfamiliar to Gracie.
“Sure, girl. Let me just say goodbye to coach.” Gracie carried her heels in one hand and her sparkling cider in the other. She hugged Coach and her husband and wished them a happy New Year. Kerry waved and mouthed her thanks from the doorway. She couldn’t get out of there fast enough.
“Wow, that was fun! It was good to see the team again.” Gracie loved being part of such a close team. Unlike her high school days, she wasn’t competing with her teammates as much as she was competing with herself. That’s the environment the coach fostered, and it made each one of them a better athlete.
“What did you tell that guy?” Kerry was edgy, almost accusatory, as she tried to get information from Gracie.
“Huh? What? Tell who?” Kerry’s questions confused Gracie.
“Mac. Jill’s brother. He said you told him about me. What did you tell him?”
“Really? All I told him was your name. He asked who the gorgeous girl in the knockout dress was and I gave him your name. Why? What’s wrong?” Gracie was worried that she had missed something. She looked her friend over. It didn’t appear that she survived an attack or anything.
“He kissed me. Right there, in a room full of people, this stranger kissed me.” The kiss obviously upset Kerry. There had to be more to it than this.
“Well, I know a lot of girls who would be flattered that a beautiful man like Mac, with his rippling muscles, bright white teeth and fashionable clothing, kissed them at the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve. I’m not so sure what’s got you all knotted up. Chill.” Gracie had a great night and didn’t want to come crashing down over a friend being kissed. It wasn’t like Kerry to get so touchy about something that seemed so minor. Gracie made a mental note to bring it up when Kerry was calmer.
Later, as she lay on the couch in the quiet, dark apartment still amped up from the evening, Kerry tried to unravel her feelings. She gazed out the window to the night sky for answers. She tried to see the situation from her friend’s perspective. When she stopped to think the situation through, she realized her reaction was extreme. She did feel slightly flattered, but whenever she thought about kissing, it wasn’t with a stranger. Mac was not her type. The only person she thought about kissing was Jesse. Getting over him was harder than she thought it would be.
Chapter 10
Jesse and Stella spent Christmas week on the trail. It was Stella’s tradition.
“I’m not a church-goin’ gal, but I know when I am out here under this sea of stars surrounded by critters, wild and tame, that there is some good force greater than me making all this happen.” Stella dug in her pack and pulled out a tin of Christmas goodies that a dear friend gave her. She passed the treasure trove of sugar goodness to Jesse.
Jesse leaned back and stared up at the indigo sky. A million pinholes of light dotted the darkness. He breathed in the cool, fresh air. He agreed that there was something in the vast unknown making all this possible. Something he couldn’t touch but could see in the ordinary, in the eyes of those he loved, and feel in the touch of someone special. He had only met one person like that. Kerry. Somewhere out there was the one his heart longed for. He wondered if she was also looking up into the night sky, thinking of him. He shook himself out of his whimsical daze and looked into the warm fire.
Jesse stopped bringing his cell phone with him on these trips. There was no use. The cell towers were too far and few between to make it worth the risk of losing the phone. Stella carried a satellite phone in case they ever needed it for an emergency. Their mom and dad had that number in case they had to reach them. Stella brought her cell phone, but only to take pictures. She turned off the ringer and the data. She loved taking photos of baby snakes, spiders and every form of wild thing she could spy. Jesse had seen her share a photo or two with friends in town. He quietly pondered why she shared none of those photos or stories with their family. Maybe she didn’t want to alarm Mom with pictures of black widow spiders or rattlesnakes.
When the eve of New Year’s Eve gave way to morning light, they packed up camp for the last time that year. Stella threw some sage on the embers of the campfire. This was her way of cleansing the space, she explained.
As they rolled through town on their way home, they stopped for a New Year’s Eve toast at the Rodeo Lounge. People packed into the place. It was impossible to get to the bar without risking an elbow in the ribs or a shower of beer from a mug.
“Hey cowboy, where you been?” Jesse looked down to see a very cute and tipsy Kendra walking by, holding hands with a guy. Jesse tipped his hat at her.
“Oh boy, that Kendra’s quite the party girl isn’t she Stella. Can’t believe you tried to hook us up.” Jesse gave his cute boy grin to his sister and shook his head.
“Just trying to do you a solid brother. Come on, this place is crazy. I’ve got some gut rot at home I’ll break out.”
Midnight was approaching as they kicked off their boots and sat their tired bodies down. Stella poured them each a smooth whiskey that Stella had held back for a special occasion.
“Here’s to a beautiful ending to the old year and a wonderful start to the new. So glad to have you here, brother.” Stella raised her highball glass to his. He agreed that it was a great place to be as they moved into a new year with a new beginning.
There was no rush to get up the next morning. Stella agreed they would have a few days off now, unless something came up, as frequently happens for a rancher. A new hired man, Joe Nance, joined them for some part-time work - checking the cattle as needed, fixing some fence and other odd jobs. He was another down-on-his luck cowboy that Stella wanted to rescue. She had a knack for that. Her skill for helping others seemed to be in how she held others, and herself accountable, Jesse noted. She didn’t hug and smother. Instead, she set out achievable challenges and celebrated wins. Even small wins. She was a lot like their mother.
It was late morning before Jesse rolled out of bed, sore from sleeping so long. He threw on his jeans, grabbed his phone and stepped out of his chilly room into the warm living room. He had a dozen missed calls and some messages. Not unusual for the holidays and being out of signal range for a week, he thought. He set the phone on the kitchen table, poured himself a cup of coffee, and used the washroom. He was grateful for indoor plumbing on this chilly January morning. When he looked out the kitchen window, he saw Stella out in the yard cleaning up the tack and tending to the horses. Taking advantage of his official day off, he sat down to go through his messages.
Their parents had called him, a few times each, to check in and wish him well. He had text messages from his brothers and a few friends from home. One message stood out to him as he scrolled through them.
Merry Christmas (Christmas tree emoji with heart ornaments) from Kerry. His heart skipped a beat, and he felt a little tug in his gut, surprised but thrilled to hear from her.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you. He wrote back finally after erasing many attempts at a more apologetic and detailed text. Jesse kept it short, clean, and simple. He didn’t know what prompted her to reach out. Kerry was probably just being nice and sent this message to everyone in her contacts list.
Jesse checked his phone while doing laundry and helping Stella with the chores. He hoped for a response from Kerry.
“Hey, how about a New Year’s resolution, you and I?” Stella tapped her brother with the back of her hand to get his attention. She had completed her chores and cooked them a late breakfast.
“What’s that?”
“Let’s get ourselves on stage at the cowboy poet’s gathering in March. That’ll be about the time you will be thinking of heading home. It’s about ten weeks for us to write something up and hey, even
if we flop, you know we’ll be entertaining.” Stella had thought about sharing a poem at the local gathering, but kind of liked having that part of her life as her own personal secret. Until Jesse opened that door.
Jesse had no confidence that he could write anything the least bit entertaining. He’d barely heard of cowboy poetry, let alone written any. Stella had a notebook full of material.
“Tell you what. I’ll get in on this challenge but only under one condition.” He wanted to see what she was writing. She had read a few lines, and he knew she was witty in her writing. He wanted to see whole pieces to get a better understanding of the craft.
“Oh yeah, what’s that?” Stella wouldn’t accept the challenge blindly. She needed to know what he had in mind.
“You share your notebook with me so I can get some ideas about what to write.” If she was anything like him, there was no way she would just hand over a notebook filled with writing. It was just too personal.
“No problem, so long as you share yours with me. I see you. I know you’re writing in that journal of yours.” Stella had seen him writing late into the night by campfire glow and in his room at her home.
“I just write sentimental crap. It will not help you any. Most of it is incredibly personal. I am happy to share parts of it with you though.”
“That’s good enough for me. There’s a copier there in the office.” Stella nodded her head toward a large pantry converted into an office. She filled their plates with a hearty cowboy breakfast of pancakes, eggs and sausage.
Stella had ranch business meetings over the next few days. Things were going well for the ranch owners, Clara and Martin Drake. They were close friends of hers, but they were always thinking of contingencies if they needed to sell or could no longer manage the ranch. She enjoyed these meetings and felt respected as part of the brain trust they relied on.