Just a Crush

by Tabatha Kiss

  Jonah tightens, his breath coming fast. “I’m coming,” he says, grabbing my hand again. “I’m coming.”

  I let my grip loosen and he guides me to point him into his shirt. He comes with a rough groan and a bright, white string of cum stains his black shirt. And another. And another. Each one accompanied by more pleasant noises and flexing muscles.

  I keep absolutely still until he’s finished. He releases my hand and folds the ruined shirt up before letting it drop to the floor again. His head falls back, eyes closed as he heavily breathes through his open mouth.

  After a few moments, he smiles and says, “Fuck.”

  I laugh. “Fuck,” I repeat.

  Jonah turns his head and looks at me. His eyes wander my face, so full of loving affection. I wonder what he’s thinking. Well, I know what he’s not thinking, and that’s what I’m thinking.

  I love you, Jonah Botsford.

  “Come here,” he whispers.

  I slink closer and he takes my face in his hands once more, gently pulling me in to lay a kiss on my lips. We linger here for another minute — or two or sixty, who the fuck knows — before he releases me and pulls his pants back up.

  “I should get you home,” he says as he bends forward to pick up my shirt.

  I take the shirt and nod. “Probably a good idea.”

  I push one arm through a sleeve and fumble around until I find the other. I get two buttons fastened before Jonah pulls me close again and kisses me hard on the lips. He wraps an arm around my waist and shifts me onto my back with ease.

  I laugh. “Not taking me home, then?” I ask.

  He barely pauses to speak, crushing me beneath the weight of his kiss. “Soon,” he says.

  I don’t say a word. I don’t even try and fight it. Why would I?

  I’m totally, completely, unequivocally his.

  Twenty-Three

  Jonah

  It doesn’t get much better than this.

  Riding down Vegas streets with the steering wheel in one hand and a pretty girl’s hand in the other. Add in the subtle buzz of a recent orgasm and there’s some cloud nine to be had. A voice in my head tells me to just keep driving. Hit the highway and don’t stop for anything but food, sleep, and sex, but Marla would never let me get away with it.

  I turn onto her street but her hand doesn’t slip free of mine just yet. We come to a slow stop and I turn the car off. The entire street around us dims but I can still make out her big, bright eyes and pale knuckles in the dark.

  “Thanks for the ride,” Marla says, gazing at me.

  “You’re very welcome,” I say. “I’d come in for a drink or something but…” I flap open my hoodie, revealing my bare chest, “I don’t exactly have a shirt right now.”

  She chuckles. “Little too late now anyway,” she says. “Wouldn’t want to wake my brothers.”

  I nod. “Good call.”

  Still, she doesn’t move. I don’t move. We just sit and stare as I gently caress the back of her hand with my thumb.

  After a moment, she licks her lips and smiles. “I can’t believe we finished the song,” she says.

  “We did,” I say with a chuckle.

  “It didn’t take as long as I thought it would.”

  “It never does.”

  “We still need a title,” she points out.

  I chuckle. “Yeah, I almost forgot. Any new ideas?”

  She shrugs. “Not really.”

  “We’ll sleep on it some more.”

  “All right.” She rests her head back, her eyes still fixated on me.

  “By the way,” I say. “I have something for you.”

  “What?” she asks with excitement.

  I release her hand to reach for the glove box in front of her. She watches with curiosity as I flip it open and retrieve the plastic lanyard from inside.

  “I had this made up for you,” I say as I hand it to her.

  Marla takes it and her jaw drops the second she makes out the words. “A backstage pass?!” she says.

  I smile at her expression. Exactly what I wanted to see. “Just flash that at the door and they’ll let you in. No cover charge.”

  “Does it expire?”

  I shake my head. “As long as you have that, you can just walk into all of our shows.”

  She giggles. “My long con is finally paying off,” she jokes.

  “Hey, we’ve got one song in the can together. You’re officially Criminal Records crew now as far as I’m concerned.”

  She tightly palms the pass. “Thank you, Jonah. This means… a lot to me.”

  “So, you’ll be there?” I ask. “I swear, I’ll hire a dozen babysitters to get you there if I have to.”

  “I wouldn’t miss it.”

  As if a puppet master just yanked our strings, we both lean toward each other and share a kiss in the dark. I rest my hand on her cheek, curling my fingers back and around her head to keep her close to me. I’m not quite ready to let her get out of this car yet. Still kind of want to give that fuck it and drive plan a go, to be honest.

  We finished our song.

  We explored each other in new ways.

  She moaned my name. I moaned hers.

  There’s only one other thing we could do to make this night an even more perfect one. All she has to do is say the word. I’ll drive her back to my hotel room. I’ll turn down the lights and I’ll take what I’ve wanted since the moment I fell for that smile.

  I deepen our kiss as my pulse pounds in my ears. Her hand settles on my chest and my skin tingles beneath her warm touch. I let the fantasy run wild in me, picturing what it would be like to take her over and over again.

  Marla pulls away, her blissful lips curled. “I need to go—”

  “Not yet.”

  I pull her back playfully and she submits to another kiss with a light chuckle on her breath. When we part again, she rests her forehead on my shoulder and I take the opportunity to fill my lungs with the scent of her hair. Need to do something to get me through a day without her.

  Marla sits up and licks her lips. “Text me when you think of me,” she says as she reaches for the door handle.

  “Oh, hell no.” I laugh. “If I did, neither of us would do anything else.”

  She chuckles. “You’re probably right.”

  I bring her hand to my mouth and I turn it up to kiss her palm. “Sweet dreams, Marla,” I whisper.

  My heart skips twice as she continues our little goodbye ritual.

  “Goodnight, Jonah,” she says, her fingers gently falling from mine.

  I melt against my seat as I watch her walk up to her porch. She fishes through her purse for a key and I wait to make sure she finds her way inside. As she steps in, she looks back at me once more, warming my gut with another one of those little half-smiles before she disappears behind the door.

  It really doesn’t get much better than this.

  Twenty-Four

  Jonah

  On my way!

  I smile at the text on my phone. Finally.

  Monday was a wasteland. One long, boring wasteland. Pre-show prep with the band. Walking on eggshells around Knox. Counting down the hours until I can be alone with Marla again. No amount of texts or quickie phone calls is enough to satisfy my need to be around her.

  But the wait is over. Our show at the Sin and Sand starts in an hour. Marla’s on her way according to the text she just sent. Then, a few more hours of just doing my job and I’ll have her all to myself again.

  I step onto the stage and set my guitar cases down next to my microphone stand on the left side. The curtain is closed but I can hear the soft rumble of voices behind the constant stream of pop music in the small space. The Sin and Sand is the very definition of a hole-in-the-wall establishment but that doesn’t exactly steal away from its diamond-in-the-rough reputation among the bar lovers of Las Vegas. Back in the day when we first started, the manager booked us for our first unpaid gig and we’ve been on a steady rise ever since. We c
ome back a few times a year to do a free concert for the hell of it and to show our appreciation.

  As I flip open my guitar cases and set up their stands, my mind obviously wanders far away from the stage at the Sin and Sand and toward another sin entirely.

  Things between Marla and I are progressing faster than I thought they would. I assumed I would have more time to prepare for our first time together but at this rate… it could even be tonight.

  The thought excites me in various ways but there’s still a part of me that’s hesitating. I don’t want to rush. I don’t want her to look back on it years from now and regret the way it happened. I want it to be special for her, as cheesy as that sounds.

  I’ve never thought about sex this way before but I’ve never been with a girl like Marla before either.

  As my thoughts continue to spiral, I notice Knox walking out with his own guitar to set up. After a minute or two of cold shoulders, he finally lets out a huff and turns around.

  “Okay, fine,” he says without looking at me.

  I turn from my mic stand. “Fine what?”

  He scratches his scruffy cheek. “Your song,” he says. “I’ve been thinking about it and… you’re right. It’s not our style.”

  I nod. “Okay.”

  “And…” He looks up at me, the final walls between us crumbling to pieces. “And I think you should play it solo. Tonight, if you want to. It does kind of have that lonely guy on the street John Mayer vibe to it.”

  “Really?”

  “Really.”

  “What changed your mind?” I ask.

  “Nothing,” he says quickly. “Just in denial about it, I guess.”

  That means Katrina got to him.

  I glance around to see if she’s listening but there’s no sign of her sun-dazzled hair.

  “You think I should play it tonight?” I ask him.

  Knox shrugs. “If you want.”

  “But what do you want?”

  “I… want my brother back,” he says. “And if that means supporting you while you do some soul-searching outside of the band, then that’s what I’m gonna do.”

  Definitely Katrina.

  I smile. “It’s just one song, Knox,” I say. “I was never going anywhere. Nowhere far anyway.”

  “Well, still… I’m sorry I got stupid about it,” he says.

  “I’m sorry for… trying to kill the band’s momentum or whatever.”

  He scoffs. “Bunch of Jordan nonsense.”

  I laugh. “Eh, she’s good at her job.”

  “Too good.”

  “So, are we cool?” I ask, extending my hand.

  Knox takes it and we shake. “Yes, we’re cool,” he says. “The rest of the band is, too, by the way.”

  “Oh, yeah?”

  “Yeah, they nominated me to come out here.” He smiles. “I think the Sin and Sand has got us feeling nostalgic.”

  “Same here,” I say.

  “Is your muse coming tonight?” he asks.

  I nod. “Marla’s on her way, yeah.”

  “Cool.”

  “Speaking of, I’ve got something to show you later.”

  He straightens up. “You guys finish a song?”

  “We did. It’s so good, even Kat will like it.”

  “Oh, shit,” he chuckles, “don’t build it up too much now.”

  I laugh as a big, booming voice echoes in from offstage.

  “What do you mean I’m not allowed back here?!”

  Knox and I glance at each other and grin.

  “Did you know he was coming?” he asks me.

  I shake my head. “Nope.”

  “I’m a very important man!” the voice calls out, loud and purposefully dramatic.

  We step off the stage and turn the corner to find a very tall, familiar man pinched between two of the bar’s security guards.

  I grin at my big brother’s smirk. “Hayden!” I shout.

  He points at me and winks. “There he is! Call off your wolves, little brother.”

  I wave down the guards. “He’s fine. He’s my brother. And an asshole. Sorry.”

  “That’s right.” Hayden adjusts the collar on his jacket as the guards disperse and let him wander past. “On all counts.”

  “What are you doing here?” I ask him over Knox’s laugh.

  Hayden stops in front of us. “Well, I missed your dinner party,” he says. “Figured I’d surprise you tonight instead.”

  “Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”

  “What are big brothers for?” He nods at Knox. “And how are you, Mr. Benton?”

  Knox nods. “I’m doing great. You?”

  “Dandy. And how’s that little sister of yours?” Hayden asks with another sly wink.

  Knox’s smile drops. “She’s fine,” he says.

  Hayden’s eyes wander around. “Is she here? I’d love to catch up with her… in private.”

  Knox glares at him and takes a few steps back. “I’m gonna go finish setting up,” he says through his teeth.

  “That’s all right.” Hayden brushes the air. “I’ll find her later.”

  I roll my eyes as Knox walks off, beelining straight toward the girls’ dressing room in the back.

  Hayden chuckles. “God, I love dudes with little sisters. They’re so much fun to mess with.”

  I laugh. “How’s Penny?” I ask him.

  He drops the alpha male schtick and follows me. “She’s fine. She’s here.” He gestures through the wall toward the bar. “Out there somewhere.”

  I pick up my empty guitar cases and set them in the wings. “Are you guys driving back tonight or staying in town for a bit?”

  “We checked into our room a half an hour ago,” he answers. “Checking out Monday morning.”

  “Nice. We’ll hang out before then.”

  I take a knee next to an amp to connect my guitar as Hayden glances around our set. My hands move on auto-pilot, adjusting wires and finishing up as my thoughts tug right back toward my muse.

  I glance at Hayden, a man of… great experience. “Hey, Hayden,” I say. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Sure,” he says.

  “It’s a little weird.”

  “I’m always down for a little weird,” he quips.

  I breathe a laugh. “Have you ever been with a virgin before?”

  “Oh, sure.” He nods, then his head tilts. “Well, she says she’s a virgin but ten minutes into it she’s on top bucking you like a bronco and you kinda have your doubts, but... yeah. It’s possible. One or two.” He furrows his brow at me. “Why?”

  “I’ve just...” I stand up and scan the backstage for eavesdroppers before continuing. “I’ve been hanging out with a girl who really is one and I’m—”

  “Marla?” he asks, smiling.

  “How did—” I stop. Of course. “Ira.”

  Hayden nods. “So, you and the night desk girl are getting friendly?”

  “She’s not the night desk girl anymore but... yeah. We’re taking it slow and I’m fairly sure we’ll cross that line eventually but I’m not sure how to go about it. Do I do what I normally do or should I try and make it special for her in some way?”

  “Was your first time special?” he asks.

  I snort. “No. God, no.”

  “Well, then, just don’t do that and you’ll be fine.” He smirks. “All kidding aside, do you care about her?”

  “Yes,” I answer.

  “And does she care about you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then, you’re all set. That alone is going to make it feel special for her. And you. No fancy candles or rose petals necessary.”

  I nod slowly. “You’re right. Yeah. Guess I’m just over-thinking it.”

  Hayden rolls his shoulders back, looking smug. “Never thought I’d see the day when you came to me for relationship advice, Jo.”

  “First time for everything, I suppose.”

  A familiar color tingles my peripheral vision and I instantly t
urn, drawn to her like a magnet. Marla strolls through the open hallway with her backstage pass proudly presented around her neck.

  Hayden turns to see where I’m looking and he grins. “Marla!” he greets her. “What a surprise!”

  She steps toward us with excitement. “Hi, Hayden. How are you?”

  “I’m doing great. It’s been a while. You look good.”

  “Thanks,” she says, blushing slightly. “I feel good.”

  “You got a backstage pass?” He glares at me. “Why don’t I get a backstage pass?”

  “She’s valuable crew,” I say with a shrug.

  “And I’m not?”

  “Not really.”

  Hayden gasps and takes a dramatic step back. “I see how it is.”

  “Jonah.”

  I flinch at my mother’s scolding tone as she appears behind me out of nowhere. I turn around and she stands there in an elegant cocktail dress — one far too fancy for the Sin and Sand but that’s never been an excuse for her to dress down — and her own backstage pass hanging from around her neck.

  She props her hands on her hips and gestures down to the guitar cases near her feet. “How many times do I have to tell you not to leave your guitar cases sitting around in the dark?” she asks.

  “Sorry, Mom,” I say. “It’s just temporary. I got distracted talking to—”

  “A temporary obstacle is an accident waiting to happen.” She piques a brow. “Move them. Don’t make me tell you again.”

  I laugh. “They’ll be moved before showtime, Mom. I promise.”

  “Better be.” She exhales the frown off her face and smiles at Marla instead. “Ms. Gorchinsky,” she says. “It’s nice to see you again.”

  “You too, Mrs. B,” Marla says.

  “How are your classes going?”

  Marla chuckles. “A little challenging this semester but not too bad.”

  “Good. Challenge makes us better.”

  Hayden waves his hand. “Hi, Mom!” he practically shouts. “I’m here, too.”

  “Case and point,” she says with a quick wink at Marla. “Is Penelope here with you?” she asks Hayden.

  He nods. “Yes, she is.”

  “Excellent. I have a few things to discuss with her.”