Love Like Crazy (Crazy Love Book 1)

by Carmen DeSousa

  “He said he had an issue with the apartment complex in Georgia.”

  “Bob is one of our best managers; Dad doesn’t have a problem in Georgia. Even if he did, he’d handle it and be back tonight.” I huffed lightly, then laughed. “He’s as meddlesome as Gram.”

  Jesse rubbed his eyes. “You have no idea. He had a man-to-man talk with me yesterday. I was completely discombobulated, but in the end, thankful. He was very informative.”

  “Dad said he wanted to talk to you. What did he say? He didn’t give you the, ‘If you hurt my daughter’ speech, did he?”

  Jesse laughed. “That would’ve been easier. No. And as I said, it was man-to-man, no-girls-allowed kind of stuff.”

  I tried not to look bothered, but I didn’t like it when the two of them didn’t involve me in their decision-making. Even though I wanted to be a stay-at-home wife and mother, I planned to be intimately involved with all our affairs.

  Jesse scooped up my hand. “Seriously, Kayla, when I say man-to-man, I mean it. As we discussed, I won’t make any major decisions for our life or business without consulting you. I want us to run our lives together. But truly, your Dad wanted to discuss man stuff.”

  “Oh!” I laughed lightly. “And he left us alone for three days …” I trailed off.

  “Yes,” Jesse said on a long sigh, sounding worried.

  I couldn’t have any of that worrying nonsense today, so I decided to change the subject. “Are you hungry?”

  “Not yet. I don’t eat much in the morning.” He pasted on a straight-lined smile, the one he used when he wasn’t completely okay with something, but ready to move on. Jesse wasn’t much for arguing, which was good; I was stubborn enough for both of us. “Hey,” he said. “Let’s get cleaned up and go out for breakfast. After all, it’s your birthday.”

  I smiled. “I guess you’ll be in real trouble if you ever forget my birthday, since you’d be forgetting —”

  Jesse kissed away my words. Not a deep, passionate kiss — evidently we had time for that later — but a sweet, good-morning kiss, one of thousands upon thousands to come. “Not a chance I’d forget your birthday, cowgirl! In fact, I have a surprise for you.”

  I smiled, but then rested my head on his shoulder again. There was only one surprise I wanted, but I’d told myself that I wouldn’t pressure Jesse today. If it happened, it happened. My thoughts fixated on three days of snuggling in bed with Jesse — with or without sex — I felt all warm and fuzzy inside. But still feeling icky on the outside, I pulled away and hopped up. “Okay, I need to get cleaned up, then I’ll meet you in the hallway. I’ll be the one in white,” I giggled.

  The ceremony was short and sweet, actually very sweet. The minister spoke of marriage from a biblical view, one of the reasons I had chosen this chapel, knowing Jesse would appreciate that.

  He spoke of the symbolism of the rings having no beginning and no end, signifying eternity together. He spoke of marriage as a gift to cherish and, most importantly, that we seek God’s wisdom in everything we did.

  Jesse was as handsome as ever and looked more thrilled every passing second. When the preacher finally got to the part, “I now pronounce you husband and wife,” I didn’t think Jesse would be able to maintain his composure. It looked like he might sweep me off the stage and out the door. He took a step forward as the preacher then said, “You may kiss the bride.”

  My husband wrapped his arms around me tightly and pulled me off my feet. But his mouth was gentle on mine. He pulled back just enough to whisper under his kisses, “I’ll love you until the day I die, Kayla, and even afterward, I believe.” And his mouth was back on mine.

  When we finally parted, Jesse swept me off my feet — literally — and carried me out of the chapel, to our new life, together.

  Chapter 27 - Jesse

  I hoped Kayla wouldn’t miss the big fanfare that usually followed the wedding vows.

  I didn’t. Not today. I only wanted to hold her in my arms for the rest of the day and through tomorrow … forever. Our honeymoon wasn’t until December, so she’d told me she’d planned to make our own paradise.

  Not wanting to let her go, I kept one arm around her waist as I set her down to unlock the truck. “Do we need anything before we head back to the house?” I asked as I lifted her into the truck. Even with the running boards, it wasn’t easy for her to get in when she wore a dress. I looked up and her eyes were glassy. “You okay, love? Are you upset that your dad isn’t here?”

  She offered me a soft smile. “Jesse, there’s absolutely nothing in the world that could upset me today. I’m quite possibly the happiest woman alive.”

  Thrilled by her comment, I stepped up on the board and leaned in, kissing her again. We needed to get back to the house. “And I’m the happiest man!”

  Her mouth turned up under my lips. “And, no, we don’t need anything. I bought everything we could possibly need.”

  As many times as I opened doors for her and helped her in and out of the vehicle, she would still forget. Well, not today. When I pulled into the driveway, before I stopped, I said, “No hopping out of the truck this time, cowgirl. Wait for me, okay?”

  I hopped down, darted around the truck, and opened the door. I scooped her up and carried her to the house. After I opened the door, I carried her over the threshold. It wasn’t our house, but it was no different from a hotel room on our honeymoon. I’d have to officially carry her over our threshold when we moved in together.

  Inside the foyer, not sure what to do next, I pulled her head to mine for a delicate kiss, then set her down.

  Her fingers intertwined with mine, then she drew me toward the stairs.

  “Kayla … We should —” I wasn’t even sure how to finish my sentence. What should we do? I asked myself. Get to know each other better? We’d spent months getting to know every significant and even insignificant detail about each other. We’d fallen in love with each other quickly and then slowly. We knew nearly every inch of each other’s bodies. There was only one thing we hadn’t done. So, what else should we do to prepare? I asked myself again.

  Thankfully, Kayla ignored my irrational, incomplete suggestion, and continued to tow me behind her. At the top of the stairs, she directed me through her door, then nudged me down onto her bed. My heart thundered loudly in my chest, but surprisingly, that normal inner voice that always chimed out warnings seemed to be quiet for once. This was right. After speaking with her father, I’d made preparations for all outcomes, but I hadn’t been prepared for her to lead me directly to her room, to crawl on top of me. I wasn’t ready yet.

  “Wait!” I gently nudged her away. “Kayla, I —”

  “Jesse,” she sighed, “it’s perfect. Everything’s perfect.”

  I rolled her to her back and pressed a hard closed-mouth kiss to her lips. “That’s not what I meant. I have something for you. Hang on. I’ll be right back.”

  I’d waited too long. No way would I ruin everything now.

  Chapter 28 - Kayla

  As soon as Jesse darted out of my bedroom, I rolled to the center of the bed, smiling. He wasn’t going to fight me. He’d be right back.

  The long white dress I’d chosen to elope in looked great when I stood upright, but I found it hard to look sexy while lying flat on my back. I should have practiced posing on the bed in it. Defeated, I edged up on my side, propping my head up on one hand, and waited.

  A few seconds later, Jesse returned with a glittery white gift bag. He reached inside, pulled out a black box, and then set the bag on the end table. He inched his way next to me, propping his head up right beside mine. With his thumb, he flicked open the velvet box, and inside was a silver box chain with a sparkling silver heart.

  “Oh, Jesse! It’s so pretty. So delicate.” No less than eight tiny diamonds encrusted one side of the heart, and six more ran up the other side.

  He smiled up at me. “Actually, it’s not that delicate. Unlike your ring, I purposely ordered the necklace and heart in 10
k white gold. I know you said you don’t wear much jewelry because of all your work in the stables, but now you can have my heart with you all the time.”

  “It’s beautiful, Jesse. I love it! Thank you.”

  “Happy Birthday, my love. I didn’t want you to miss your birthday present because of your wedding. It’s like a kid with a birthday on Christmas.” He took the box and set it on the table.

  I peeked over his shoulder. “What else is in the bag?”

  “You’ll see.”

  Jesse pressed his lips to mine and gently lowered me to my back. My blood pulsed as his fingers traced my collarbone and down my chest.

  “This feels right, Kayla.”

  “Jesse … are you saying? Are you going to make love to me?”

  “I only want to do what you want, nothing more. We can take as long as you need. But yes, I plan on loving you all day if you’ll allow me. We don’t have to do anything specific, but I want to feel you in my arms. I want to make you feel good. I want to love you completely, and I want you in my arms when I wake up every morning.”

  “Oh, Jesse, I want this too. I can’t tell you how much I want this. My body feels like it’s on fire every time you touch me. I want to know what it feels like to experience you completely.”

  He stopped the course his fingers had been making and gazed into my eyes. “Kayla, you realize it might hurt the first time, right?”

  “Yes …” I quietly gulped down the tiny lump that had formed in my throat. “I’m not afraid, Jesse. I know you’ll be gentle.”

  “If you don’t feel uncomfortable, I think I can make it easier.”

  “I trust you,” I said on a sigh, “completely.”

  “How about the time of the month? Do I need protection?”

  From my research, I knew that if I didn’t want to get pregnant or catch a disease, I should always use protection. But Jesse had never had sex and based on the time of the month, while it wasn’t impossible to get pregnant, it was highly improbable. And truthfully, while I’d rather wait, it wouldn’t upset me if I got pregnant.

  Not wanting to discuss contraceptives right now, though, I just shook my head. This was really going to happen. I had thought I would have to beg him, but evidently, my father’s man-to-man talk must have made the difference, and now I was nervous. Not about Jesse, but about what we were going to do. Would I be able to please him? How much would it hurt?

  Jesse pushed my hair off my neck and lowered his face to my ear. “I love you, Kayla. Please don’t be nervous. We don’t have to do anything.”

  I started to protest, but he kissed away my words. His mouth moved over mine seductively. I parted my lips and he didn’t hesitate; he kissed me deeply and passionately. Blood rushed through my body and pounded in places I’d never experienced before. His tongue moved with mine. He moved his mouth expertly. Just his kissing was incredible, and I felt a quiver run through my body.

  His fingers grazed the side of my neck, then slowly moved down my side, leaving a trail of fire. His hand lingered at my hip, then traced up around my chest, circling my breasts. He’d never touched me like this before, and I suddenly wanted more. His hands moved down to my waist and across my dress. He pressed his hand gently against my abdomen, and the blood rushed there as well. He moved his hand down my dress to below my knee. Pulling up the dress, he traced a pattern over my leg, slowly moving up my inner thigh. My blood boiled, and I wasn’t sure I could contain the rushing wave of emotion.

  I tried to move my hands to him, but he politely stopped me and moved his lips to my ear again. “Not yet. Just lie back and feel me touching you. We have plenty of time. Can I remove your dress?”

  “Yes.” I gulped, squeezing my eyes shut, feeling his breath in my ear again.

  “Breathe, Kayla. I’m your husband. You trust me, right?”

  I nodded.

  “I want to make sure you don’t hurt. I want to make you feel good, but you have to relax.”

  “Jesse?” I asked, opening my eyes. “How do you know all this?”

  “I told you. I like to read, and I listen.”

  I closed my eyes again, and my body melted under his touch. He unhooked my dress and unzipped it all the way to my lower back, but he didn’t pull it off. I kept my eyes closed as his lips traveled across my cheekbones and his fingers inched the front of my dress lower. His mouth stayed on mine as he slipped the dress to my hips. He trailed kisses down my neck, between my breasts, all the way to my tummy. My muscles tensed.

  “You’re beautiful, and your body is perfect,” he whispered between kisses. “You don’t have to feel uncomfortable. I love you, and I plan to learn every inch of you.”

  He moved his way back up to my mouth and lowered his body over mine. He kissed me lightly and moved his lips up my jaw again, over my cheeks, on my forehead. He pulled back from me. I felt his gaze and opened my eyes. He was looking at me with such passion, his eyes liquid.

  “I love you, Kayla, with all my heart.”

  I felt my eyes sting. “I love you too.”

  “How do you feel … do you trust me?”

  “Completely,” I said on an exhale, meaning it. “Please don’t stop.”

  “I’ll go very slowly.”

  Jesse removed my dress the rest of the way. “God you’re beautiful, Kayla,” he whispered again. He seemed to know exactly what to say, when to say it, and where to touch me. It was as though he were listening to my soul. His fingers trailed around my waist, gently tracing its lines. He took every move cautiously so as not to alarm or panic me. After trailing his fingers around my naval, he removed my panties and bra.

  I heard a small rustle of the bag, but then felt his palm press gently against my stomach again, and then he moved his hand to my thigh as he pressed his entire palm against different parts of my body, just slight pressure, desensitizing me, forcing my body to get used to his touch.

  I gasped as silky fingers slowly moved against me, gently parting me.

  His breath was at my ear again. “Breathe, Kayla. I love you, baby.”

  My pulse thudded through my body and my hips arched to feel more of him. He pressed his lips against mine and moved his mouth back and forth over my mouth in perfect rhythm with his fingers. His tongue made tiny circles with mine, as his fingers mimicked the movements.

  A current coursed through my entire body, like small doses of electricity shocking me, but it felt incredible and I didn’t want it to end. I wasn’t supposed to feel this. I’d read that it could take months to orgasm, but Jesse had insisted I feel everything. When I asked my cousin how I’d know, she simply replied, If you’re not sure if you did, then you didn’t. I hadn’t understood at the time, but now I did.

  “Oh … that … oh … my … wow.” I opened my eyes, but I was pretty sure they rolled back in my head as I arched my hips again, wanting more. I found Jesse’s eyes, and he smiled, looking pleased. He knew what he’d accomplished and looked proud.

  “Are you okay?” he whispered.

  Unable to speak, I nodded.

  He moved his mouth over mine and started to unbutton his shirt. Once done, I helped pull it off. I traced his chest. He was wide and strong — gorgeous.

  I moved my hands to his pants and helped him shed them as well. I didn’t close my eyes this time; I wanted to see him.

  He moved to my ear again. “Are you ready, my love?” I nodded again. “I need to hear you. Tell me.”

  “Jesse,” I whispered. He wanted to hear his name. How many times had he breathed my name? “Make love to me.” I braced myself, and he stopped.

  “Relax, Kayla, breathe. I’m going to make love to you, but we’re going to take as long as you need.” He moved toward me again. “Just move with me, okay? You have to let me know if it hurts.”

  I felt him then, and I couldn’t keep from gasping.

  He pulled back, his eyes widening as though he were in pain. “Are you okay? You want me to stop?”

  There was pain, but an overwhelming
desire to please my husband masked any discomfort. “No.” I grabbed onto his shoulders, holding him inside of me. “I’m more than okay,” I said breathlessly. “You have made everything right.” The only thing I felt was joy at being able to share this experience with him.

  “This is a gift, Kayla. A husband and wife are supposed to feel pleasure.” He was gentle as he moved again, and his words calmed me.

  There was no trepidation; I was in love, and this was my husband.

  I moved with him. “Jesse …” I tried to speak, but my words wouldn’t come. Heat surged through me again. “Jesse … oh … Wow!” I wrapped my arms around him tighter, pulling him deeper, never wanting to let him go.

  Chapter 29 - Jesse

  My name on her lips was all I needed to hear. She was okay, she wasn’t in pain, and she was my wife. It was everything I’d dreamt of and more. I hadn’t imagined the overwhelming joy of hearing her pleasure, but now a surge of heat pulsed through my body as her hips moved with mine. Nothing I’d ever experienced was close to this.

  There must have been a total eclipse of the sun, because the room turned pitch black as my body trembled. Depleted of every ounce of strength in my body, I collapsed beside my wife.

  “Wow, is right!” I blinked a few times to clear my vision. The room spun, but it felt good. I reached for Kayla and pulled her back into my arms. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  Tears slid down her cheeks, but she was smiling. “I’m more than okay, Jesse. That was … wonderful.”

  “And you … you did, right?”

  She licked her lips and a huge smile turned up her cheeks. “Oh, yeah.”

  “I only have one complaint, Kayla.” Her eyes grew wide, so I quickly continued, “How am I going to leave you for a week, let alone three months? This is exactly what I was afraid of.”

  “So, you’re sorry we made love?”

  “Are you kidding?” I burst out. “Never! This is the happiest day of my life. I have a beautiful bride, and we just experienced one of God’s greatest gifts. No, baby, I’m not sorry. But how am I going to be able to leave without you?”