I Pick You

by Jettie Woodruff

  By the time Saturday rolled around, I already decided to keep my mouth shut and make it through the next two days. Rydell was good for me, and I couldn’t take what I did back. I loved her and I wanted her in my life. I saw no point in revealing hurtful information that wouldn’t change a thing. I missed Bay like crazy, but having the week with Rydell gave me hope. We could do this and Bay would always be in my life. That I would never change.

  I made love to Rydell that morning, cutting it close to being late for the clan I had to pick up and entertain for two days. Two days. That was it. I could handle two days and then come Monday, bam. Kit would leave and Rydell, Bay, and me would get back to the way we were.

  “Every time I think I couldn’t love you more, you show me I can. I had fun this week. We need more adult time.”

  I kissed Rydell one last time with a smile on her lips, and a whole lot of trepidation about the next two days, hoping like hell I could pull it off. “Maybe we can let Gabriella keep her a night or two so we can do that. I had fun, too. Now get up. We have to go pick up everyone.”

  Rydell rolled from below me, pushing my chest with her hands. “Ha, you’re a funny, funny guy. I’m going to clean the barn. You have fun with that.”

  “Seriously? You’re bailing on me?”

  “Your family hates me, and I’m not really wanting to spend the day with your baby mama. I will be back later to sleep in your bed. I wouldn’t want her to get any ideas.”

  I watched her walk to my bathroom, admiring her fit body, her sexy arms and strong back, her tight ass, and long naked legs. “Thanks for having my back, buddy.”

  “You bet, babe.”

  Adrenaline pumped through my body as soon as I called to the steaming shower, telling Rydell I was on my way out. It didn’t slow down once I was on the road, either. If anything, it propelled faster. I gave myself a pep talk the entire way there, trying like hell to assure myself this was right. I was certainly doing the right thing.

  Then I saw her.

  “Fuck me,” I audibly said, when I saw her squatted in front of a crying Bay, long sandy blonde hair flowing around her face, a tan from another country, and beautiful. God, she was beautiful and my daughter was the cutest kid on the planet. Seeing her made me realize how much I loved her.

  I parked right beside them and scooped up Bay without warning. “Hi, baby. I missed you so much. What’s wrong, pumpkin?”

  Bay dramatically cried out, heaving in deep breaths like she did when she was really upset. “Ma, ma, ma.”

  “Shhh, it’s okay, baby. Stop crying. Daddy can’t understand you.”

  “Mavis. The airline lost Mavis.”

  Bay cried out again, reaching back toward the doors, crying out for her kitty. “What do you mean they lost her? How do you lose a cat?”

  “Go ask them. They did.”

  I did go ask. I handed Bay over to her mom and walked right in, demanding someone find my daughter’s pet. Unfortunately, pissed off dad’s didn’t really get very far in finding missing animals. I was nicely escorted out by two understanding security guards, both taking my number, promising to do their own investigating.

  Bay cried herself to sleep while we waited in the parking lot for my mom and sister to arrive. An hour and ten minutes of silence. I tried to talk to Kit, but she didn’t really talk back. She answered with, Hmm-Mmm’s or short no’s. Not one glance my way.

  I called the stupid airline four times, hoping for some good news. They gave me the same answer every time. They were investigating the incident and would be in touch. “I don’t get it. I mean, did they just toss her cage in with the luggage? This guy said he thinks Mavis compromised the cage herself, yet they can’t fine the crate either.”

  “Yes, Brantley. I know. I’ve been trying to figure it out for an hour while you were doing whatever.”

  “Traffic, Kit. That’s what I was doing,” I said, while lying through my teeth. It wasn’t what I was doing, it was who, but in my defense, traffic was bad. It did take me a lot longer than I had anticipated.

  “Whatever. I don’t care. Oh, there’s Bridge, they just landed,” Kit added, totally blowing me off.

  I frowned, wondering why the hell Bridgette texted Kit and not me. I started the car with a deep breath of courage and backed out, catching a glimpse of poor Bay’s puffy eyes, sadness written all over her sleeping face. Stupid bastards.

  Once all the hugging was over, and my mom and sister paid more attention to Bay’s mom than me, Kit explained the kitten dilemma. It didn’t matter, though. We still had to leave without Mavis.

  Thanks to Rydell and her insisting I fill the spare bedroom with twin beds, my mom and Bridgette had a room to sleep in. I wanted them to get a room. Rydell was the one who called me a stubborn child and forced me to accommodate my family.

  I let the three of them takeover the plans Rydell and I had already made for Bay’s party because it was easier than dealing with the drama of it all. Rydell didn’t mind when I told her all of our circus themed decorations had been replaced with pink. Princess pink with tiaras and diamond necklaces.

  Rydell—Don’t fret it, babe. We’ll use them for your birthday. Let her mom have this with her. I get it. No worries.

  Brantley—That’s why I love the shit out of you. Please tell me you’re coming soon. I’m out numbered here.

  Rydell—Oh, so you’re telling me your family loves baby mama. Great. I’m not coming.

  Brantley—Yes, you are!

  I said it, I texted it, but I didn’t mean it. I knew I wouldn’t fight too hard to get her there.

  Rydell—I don’t know, Brantley. I honestly think I’m going to opt out.

  I texted a nasty message and erased it right away. Me pointing out how she just wanted to ditch me for the bar was me being selfish. She lived above the bar, she loved to sing there, and I knew in my heart she would have been right there had I sincerely asked.

  Brantley—I want you here, but I understand if you’re not comfortable around my obstinate family.

  Rydell—Want me to come pick you up after Bay goes to sleep?

  I smiled, looking up and catching Kit quickly turn her eyes from mine.

  Brantley—Yes! You’re a genius.

  Rydell—Right? Ever do it on a pool table? Want to close the place down?

  Brantley—Fuck yeah!

  Rydell—LOL. You’re on cowboy. I’ll see you around nine.

  One of us aided in Bay’s attention every time she mentioned Mavis, a race, a ride in her battery powered car, a playdough session, a bath full of bubbles, and whatever else we could think of to keep her mind off her kitty. This went on until she once again cried herself to sleep, wanting her Mavis. Of course the stupid airlines had no information on Mavis’s whereabouts. She just vanished into thin air and thick clouds. Literally.

  “I’m going to head out for a little bit. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”

  My mom and Bridgett looked up from Kit’s photo sharing on her phone, but Kit did not. Her thumb swiped back and forth waiting for me to go.

  “Where are you going? I just poured you glass of wine,” my mother questioned, with an outreached arm and crystal wineglass that wasn’t mine.

  “Yeah, I don’t really sip on wine. That’s a little higher class than I care to be in.”

  Bigmouth Bridgett was the one who assured me of my dick-wad status. “You’re an egotistical ass. Why don’t you get off your high horse and stop?”

  “Why don’t you kiss my high horse ass? I didn’t invite you here anyway.”

  “Good thing I’m here for Bay and not you then, huh?”

  “Brantley John, Bridgett Noel. Stop. I don’t want to hear this nonsense. Brantley, go. If you need to get out of here, then by all means, do it, but don’t be nasty to your sister,” my mother scolded, like anything she said mattered.

  I walked away, hearing the horn blow in my driveway, and Kit telling my mom and Bridgett that Noel was also her middle name.

  “Hey, baby
,” Rydell said, as I slid into the driver’s seat of her truck and kissed her.

  “God, am I happy to see you. Got any of those brownies?”

  Rydell laughed, placing her hand high on my leg. “No, but I have good news.”

  “I’ll take it.”

  “Silver Spikes canceled. Jude the lead singer has the flu. We’re filling in.”

  My hand went into the air with a half ass high-five, my fingers lacing with hers. “Sweet, that’s just what I need after the day I’ve had.”

  “It started out good,” she teased, while reminding me of why I was late getting there.

  “I bet it can end even better.”

  “Oh, I’m sure of it.”

  Getting lost in country two step music and love songs with Rydell was exactly what I needed to forget the drama going on under my own roof. I was good and drunk by eleven, singing my heart out to an old Waylon Jennings’s song, a true song. One I didn’t pick. It hit too close to home, and I was no doubt in love with a good hearted woman, and she was in love with a two timing man. Up until that moment it was one of my favorite songs. I now hated it with a passion.

  Our five minute break turned into more than a break. Rydell and I were making out like a couple horny teenagers by the men’s bathroom when my phone buzzed in my pocket.

  I answered the weird number with a frown, wondering who would be calling me this close to midnight. “Hello.”

  “Yes, is this Brantley Jandt? The one with the lost kitten?”

  “Yes,” I replied with hope, one finger in my ear, trying to hear.

  “This is Wayne, the security guard that walked you out.”

  “Yeah, did you find her?

  “Yup, I’ve got her in my arms.”

  “Oh, my God. You have no idea how happy this makes me. We’ll be there within the hour.”

  “I’ll meet you at the door.”

  I turned to Rydell, dropping the good news with a high-pitched tone. “They found Mavis.”

  “I heard, but you’re drunk.”

  My fingers were already dialing Kit. “I know. I’ll make Kit come.”

  “If you’re calling for me to come after your drunk ass, call a cab.”

  “I’m not, Kit. They found Mavis, but I can’t drive. My keys are on the hook by the garage door. Come and get me.”

  “Are you serious? They found her? Where are you?”

  “Just go to the stop sign and turn right. It’s the first bar you’ll see on the right. Mid-town.”

  “I’m on my way.”

  Being around Rydell was so easy for me. As long as Kit wasn’t around, but I still didn’t get it. I didn’t understand what it all meant. How could I love her so much, but feel this pull toward Kit? I loved her, too. That was the answer I didn’t want to accept. The cold hard truth.

  Kit still treated me like I barely existed, silence the whole trip. I talked. I talked a lot because I was drunk. I might not have made much sense, but I talked. About Harry Potter, of all things. She didn’t respond. Not once. Not even when I told her about something she probably didn’t know, but Simon did. He told me.

  “Hakuna Matata was famed by Disney in, The Lion King, The phrase is actually widely spoken over there.”

  “Shut up. You don’t even know what you’re saying. I know what Hakuna Matata means. It’s tattooed on the back of my neck.”

  “It is?”

  “Yes.”

  I knew about the little butterfly by her hipbone, but I had never seen that one. “No worries? You had that tattooed on your body?”

  “Yup.”

  “Why? I mean, what does it mean to you?”

  “It meansno worries.”

  “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

  Kit gave a signal and turned into the airport parking lot. “You wouldn’t understand if I told you.”

  “Try me.”

  “Nah, I’m good.”

  That right there made me even more curious. There was a story there and I wanted it. I didn’t deserve it, but I wanted it.

  We made our way back with Mavis safe and sound in Kit’s lap. The little bastard hated me, too. Traitor. The ride back and the alcohol left me wanting to skip the bar closing plan. I texted Rydell, hoping she didn’t have her heart set on it.

  Brantley—Soooo, guess what?

  Rydell—You’re leaving me high and dry?

  Brantley—First of all, I have never seen you dry, but no. Not that. We have Mavis, and then I’m ditching you for my bed and sleep.

  Rydell—Gah! I knew it. Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow. Wendi took your place on stage. You owe me.

  Rydell—Big time!

  I smiled as I thought about the meme from the Big, Bang Theory, with Sheldon and the, soft kitty, warm kitty, caption. I was sure the kitty part had some underlying message about sex, but I didn’t text back for clarification.

  Kit pulled into the garage, but she didn’t move. She shut off the car and stared straight ahead. The beat in my heart picked up a bit as I waited for the silence to pass, terrified of what she would say.

  “You don’t have to worry about me telling her, Brantley. I’m not going to say anything. I know you made a mistake, and I know I pushed myself on you. I just wish you would have stopped me before I made a fool out of myself. I’m going to leave here tomorrow night and you can go on with your life. I’ll still call Bay every night, but I really don’t need to hear your funny stories about seven-year-olds, and I’ll keep mine for my documentary. Night, Brantley.”

  I didn’t talk. Not a word. I watched Kit open the door and disappear into the house, feeling gutted, and so fucking lost. My fist punched the dashboard and I kicked my foot, and then the other one. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. Why me? Why the fuck me?”

  No matter how tired I felt, I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t do anything, but think about the mess I was in. Kit’s promise to keep my secret did little for my conscience. It made it worse, if anything. For whatever stupid reason, I didn’t want her to feel like it was a mistake. I didn’t cheat just to cheat. It wasn’t about the sex. It was her. It was about her, but how could I say that out loud? I didn’t understand what it meant myself. Why would I say it out loud?

  My eyes felt like sandpaper when I woke to the smell of food. Bacon and blueberry muffins. I showered and then joined all four of them in the kitchen, Bay front and center on the island.

  “Happy birthday, Bay Berry Jandt.”

  “Mavis on a cake.”

  I smiled at Kit, licking white frosting from a spatula, explaining the big pile of poufy icing on top of the cake. I know our eyes did something, and then Bridgett broke the trance.

  “Needless to say, not one of us is artistic enough to put Mavis on a cake.”

  I turned to Bridgett and looked down to Mavis attacking my feet. Bay giggled like crazy.

  “You think that’s funny? Huh? I’ll show you funny,” I said, while holding Bay’s ankles, dropping her to Mavis attacking her falling hair. “Are you having a party, birthday girl?”

  “Uh-huh, and Pill, and Wowan, and, and, and.”

  “Vander,” I said, helping her out.

  “And Dell.”

  I walked away with Bay on that note, into the dining room where my mom decorated the room in pink, and I prayed for a quick birthday party. All I had to do was make it through the day and things would go back to normal. The anticipation , caused me to hit the bottle of Jack a couple times and drink a few beers. I needed something to relax.

  The Pierce family showed up first with a big box, her four friends from school next, then Wendi and John showed up at the same time Rydell did, and finally, Father Don. I hoped he was only stopping by to drop off a gift. I had a feeling I would need a few more swigs of that bottle.

  Rydell slid her hand into mine, pulling me closer to her as we entered the dining room to a game of pin the crown on the princess already in session, led by Kit.

  “You didn’t tell me she looked like that. Now, I’m jealous.”


  I smiled at her and watched Bay argue with her mom about breaking the piñata. She already played that game, and she didn’t understand the other kids having their turn, too.

  “Dell,” Bay called, in a full run as soon as she saw her.

  “Hey, birthday girl. I brought you a present.”

  “I free,” Bay said, with two fingers in the air.

  “You’re two, don’t rush it. Can you put this with your other presents?”

  “K.”

  I watched Kit’s eyes stare at Rydell with something unreadable, and then Rydell did it. Their eyes locked and everyone noticed. My mom, Bridgett, Wendi, Gabriella, and even Father John. I didn’t know what the hidden words spoken between them were, but they were no doubt there.

  Gabriella was the one to break the awkwardness. “You’re up, Vander.”

  Other than that first encounter everything went smooth. We watched the kids play three games, then Bay wanted the cut the cake. That’s when it all unraveled. All because I talked Rydell into singing happy birthday with our guitars. I started and Rydell followed, our voices coming together to create a beautiful birthday song.

  Bay stopped it. She put her hands over the neck, covering the strings on Rydell’s guitar and pulled. “My mommy do it.”

  Again the uncomfortable glance was exchanged between Rydell and Kit, but Rydell was a trooper, and she hated drama as much as I did. She stood and handed over her guitar to Kit like the bigger person, a fake ass smile, right to Kit and then me.

  Kit propped her foot to a chair, and picked the same tune I had rehearsed with Rydell, and then my voice blended with hers, creating something…magical. I don’t know if it was the little girl we shared, or what the hell it was, but that’s how it felt - magical. Thanks again to Gabby, everyone else joined in, somewhat saving the moment.

  I caught a dirty look from Wendi and frowned when Rydell walked out of the room. Of course I followed her, hoping to salvage yet another bump in the road. “I’m sorry, babe.”

  Rydell looked over her shoulder and stepped out to the patio. “Why do I feel like there’s more going on here than the weekend that resulted in Bay? Why didn’t you tell me she was hot, or that she could sing like that?”