Living in Your Hell

by Barb Shuler

  I knew Shelby was calling me by the ringtone playing in my ear, but we were chasing after a man in a brown trench coat. A trench coat that matched the images in the surveillance cameras. He'd cut down an alley and literally, disappeared.

  How did that happen? No fucking clue. I ran my hand through my hair and cursed. Gabe was now talking to the Police Department's K-9 officer and trying to plot out a better way to set up and catch this fucker. I mean seriously, this town is not that big. Someone has to know something. He's not a fucking ghost.

  “Dispatch to Sheriff, come in. Dispatch to Sheriff, come in.”

  Derek’s voice over the radio had us all at attention. Gabe keyed the mic on his shoulder, his head tilted in question as he spoke.

  “Sheriff Cartwright, go ahead, Dispatch.”

  There was a pause, enough so that Gabe keyed his mic again and called back into the station. When Derek’s voice came back through, the tone said more than his words.

  “Sheriff-” The radio cut off. Gabe's cell rang a second later. He hit speaker and started talking.

  “Derek? What's happened?”

  “Gramps, something's going on at Doc’s. Mrs. T just called in and said Kaitlyn came screaming down the sidewalk. All she can get her to say is some man was hurting her mommy. The kid is hysterical, and- I can't get an answer at Doc’s,” Derek sputtered out.

  “Get the others over there now! We’re on our way,” Gabe ordered.

  “We’ll be right behind you,” Officer Kruger said as he ran to kennel his K-9 in the SUV.

  My heart hammered as the prospects of what could be happening played out in my head. What had happened? Why was Kaitlyn running around? What was she running from? What would we find when we got to Doc’s?

  Panic. This must be what pure panic feels like.

  My foot was hard on the pedal as I tried to get to my girls. The minute Doc’s came into view I slammed on the brakes and was out of my car. My anger rose the moment I saw my pregnant wife on the ground, holding some dude in a headlock. Stella was across the walkway with another dude all but hogtied, and then I saw the blood. Somebody was bleeding, but who?

  “Sheriff’s Department,” Gabe bellowed. “Doctor McKenna, Miss Malone, anyone else inside?”

  “Shelby, anyone inside?” Stella asked. “Sheriff, I just got back with lunch. I saw Shelby wrestling with that guy, and this one tried to run, so I tackled him.”

  I pulled the man away from my wife. Jackson had him up and in cuffs before I could blink. When did he get here? Drew called out, “clear” and I realized he was coming out of the clinic.

  I knelt beside Shelby and looked her over as best as I could. “Shelby, what happened?” Nothing. She just laid there. “Shelby, sweetheart, come on, baby, talk to me,” I pleaded.

  “Shelby,” Stella said moving to her other side. “Shelby Rea, don't make me smack you.”

  “Shelby, baby, come on. I need to know if you're okay,” I said.

  She was breathing. Her eyes were only slits though. Could she be passed out? Unconscious? What had they done to her? The EMT’s pushed me to the side and I watched as Riley ran an ammonia stick under her nose. Shelby blinked and came up in a rush of hands. I moved to grab her arms and pulled her to me. I put my face in hers as I spoke.

  “Whoa, baby. It's me. I've got ya. You’re safe, sweetheart.”

  “Charlie?” She buried her face into my neck and sobbed. My anger spiked as I held her. I moved to sit on my ass, and pulled her into my lap.

  “Shhh, I've got ya. I need to know what happened. Can you tell me what happened to you? And Kaitlyn?” I asked.

  “Kaitlyn! Oh God!” Shelby shrieked and fought to get up. Both Riley and I moved to make her stay still.

  “Hey, she's with Mrs. T. Focus on me right now, baby. Tell me what happened?”

  “Two men,” she was shaking so hard that her teeth were chattering. I wasn't sure if it was anger, fear or just the adrenaline rush. I tightened my arms around her. Pulling back when she winced.

  “Where do you hurt?” I looked towards the cars where the men were and I swear I wanted to go rip their throats out.

  “Two men came-” she was regaining her voice. “They came in. One was hurt. Knife wound. He went crazy when I said I wouldn't give him drugs. The shaggy one- he-” she stopped and pushed up from me.

  I helped her stand. We all watched as she limped to the grass and paced in a small circle. Her hand rubbed her baby bump, which was large enough now that anyone could see. The fact that those fuckers attacked her was bad enough, but to attack a pregnant woman… oh, how I wanted to get my hands on them.

  “Shelby? Baby, we need to know what happened,” I said, my voice sounding much calmer than I felt.

  Shelby turned towards the cars and then back to me. Her tears were now leaving clean trails down her cheeks.

  “The younger one, came after me,” she met my gaze. I could see the pain and fear in her eyes. “The- the other man grabbed Kaitlyn. I didn't- I couldn’t move fast enough. He- oh God, he had her, shaking her. She bit him.” She laughed and I could hear the hysteria in it. Stella moved closer to her but Shelby stopped her with a hand out.

  “Shelby, it's not your fault!” Stella ground out.

  “HE HAD MY CHILD! I couldn't….” she trailed off and screamed in frustration.

  I moved to her just as Stella did. No way she could push us both back. We encased her in our arms and let her fight. Her screams turned into sobs again and we held on. Both of us spoke to her in soft words. She was blaming herself and it was not her fault.

  “I'm- I'm okay now,” she whispered after what seemed like hours. Stella pulled back, cupping her face as I kept my arms wrapped around her.

  “You're a badass, don't forget that. You can't stop all the bad shit in life. I'll go get munchkin, so you can see that she's okay. Okay?” Stella said.

  “Thank you. I need- I need to see for myself,” Shelby panted out.

  “I've got her.” At the sound of Jackson’s voice we all looked over at him. Kaitlyn was laying against him, her little face streaked with tears. There was blood on her shirt. Shit!

  “Kaitlyn! Why are you bleeding? Oh my God. I'll kill them both!” Shelby roared.

  I grabbed her and spun her to face me. I gripped her hard and made her look at me. “Stop it! You're going to scare her more. Relax, baby. If it was bad Jacks would have said so. Deep breaths, beautiful. You're gonna make yourself sick. Think of the baby.”

  “Oh, Charlie,” she dissolved into tears again and I fought to keep my own ass under control. My anger and fear for my family was beginning to take a toll.

  “Hey,” Jacks voice was softer, and a helluva lot closer now. I shifted Shelby so she could see him and Kaitlyn. “She’s okay. They didn't hurt her,” he said, knowing we’d all hear him.

  “What happened?” Gabe asked before I could.

  “Ah, Kaitlyn tripped on the sidewalk trying to get to Mrs. T., who happened to be out sweeping the sidewalk. She saw it happen, took her inside and called the station. The scrapes will heal. She's a very brave girl,” Jacks said. I shifted my arms and let Shelby go.

  “Kaitlyn, oh, my baby,” Shelby said as she took Kaitlyn, who all but threw herself at Shelby.

  “Mommy!” Kaitlin clung to her like a little monkey.

  We all stood there for a minute, letting our nerves settle. It wasn't until Shelby started telling us exactly what happened, that an unforgettable scent filled the air. Smoke. Then a shrieking alarm went off.

  “Fire!” Someone yelled and Jacks took off inside Doc’s.

  “Oh shit! The oven was on,” Shelby said, panic in her eyes.

  “Papa’s cates!” Kaitlyn chimed in.

  Well, shit.

  20

  Unpredictable

  Charlie

  It's been four hours, a few dozen cups of coffee, many tears and a temper tantrum since everyone was hauled to the station from Doc G’s.

  Riley and Abe, Burke County’s very
own paramedics had both insisted on coming with us and getting a good look at both Shelby and Kaitlyn. Shelby was put off by this. Her exact words were, “I'm a doctor, for Christ’s sake. I’d know if I were hurt!”

  I thought things were gonna get hairy, but when your ‘almost’ four year old takes your hand and says, “Don't be scared, Mommy. Thems the good peaspoles,” all while meeting your gaze with those big blue eyes you melt and give in. That's exactly what Shelby did.

  Abe, with Dani Lynn at his side, looked Kaitlyn over while Riley and I took Shelby back to the locker room and got her cleaned up. She has multiple abrasions, bruises and will feel like hell tomorrow but she was stable. Her blood pressure was a little high, which considering everything, was understandable.

  Thankfully, other than a scraped up knee, two skinned elbows and a bruised and scraped chin, Kaitlyn would be fine. She had fared much better than she had when she fell off the front steps at home. Our little bit was a tough cookie, after all.

  When Doc showed up at the station, pissed to the gills and demanding to know what happened - it was Kaitlyn that got to him first.

  “Papa!” she screamed out his name as she ran to him. The moment she was up in his arms she hugged him tight.

  “My sweet angel. Are you okay? What happened to your chin?” He asked, his brows pulling together.

  “I falled.”

  “What happened today?” He was looking at her but I knew he was asking us. Before I could say anything though, Kaitlyn was giving him a play by play.

  “Papa, dems means man's mates mommy mad. Him… hims lifts me ups and shates me. Hims smelled yucky, too” she stopped to wave her hand in front of her nose. A few chuckles filled the room before she continued. “I bides him when- when hims yells at mommy. Him yells more and… and him drops me.. and...and mommy say wuns… I wuns and falled downs. I gots owies.. but.. but I tells Nanny Ewaine ands her calls my daddy. Hims comes to helps mommy.”

  Every eye in the place had been on her as she excitedly told the tale of what happened. She had been scared, but now that everyone had reassured her that she'd done such a good job, she was back to her old self.

  As Kaitlyn spoke the old man's face went from pissed to soft and worried and back to pissed off in seconds. It was a dicey place to be. He wanted to keep his girls safe. I understood that. I wanted to do the same.

  “What happens now?” I asked. Gabe scrubbed a hand over his face and gave me a look. My brow rose in challenge but he still took another moment before he answered.

  “I've asked for some help. Officers will be patrolling tonight as usual, but the Police Department is placing men at both of your houses until this is sorted. We don't know if this is related to-” Gabe paused and looked at Kaitlyn quickly before continuing, “we’re not sure if he had anything to do with it. It's a sticky spot and before you say anything… this has nothing to do with your ability to protect your family. I want to make sure you're all safe.”

  “We’d do the same for any of them. We had help when Kris was in trouble,” Jacks said.

  “Don't forget about our help when Lana was in trouble,” Derek chimed in.

  “Or the help when I was in trouble,” Anna said as she waddled her extremely pregnant self into the main room. She went to Doc and took Kaitlyn from him for a quick kiss and hug.

  “It's a fact of life, boys and girls,” Dani Lynn said with a heavy sigh. “Nothing you can do but go with it and hope you learn something along the way.”

  “Like what? What in the hell can you possibly learn from stuff like this happening?” I asked.

  She leveled a glare at me. “For one, that you're not alone. You have friends and family ready to jump in and save you or help you. There is no shame in either. You also learn that there are still decent fuc-fudging people in this world. Not many people get to see or feel the kindness of others. Wanna know why, Charles? Because, like with those two idiots today, we learn that most people are assholes. They think about themselves and no one else. If someone else gets hurt, they don't care. It's all about them - but when you have people around you that care, and want to help you, you turn out to be that kind of person and not some asshole.”

  We had all gone silent while Dani Lynn ranted. Drew moved up beside her and the moment he touched her arm she sighed.

  “I see so much of this everyday. People throwing the ones they supposedly love away, without any regard to their well being. It's just nice to know that some good, decent people are still out there,” Dani Lynn said, giving Shelby and I a small smile.

  “I couldn't agree more, princess,” Gabe said, moving to hug his daughter.

  I was relieved when we could get our girls out of there and go.

  So, here we are back at Doc’s place, with all the windows open, to help the smell of the smoke escape. Luckily, other than a burnt pan and some smoke inside, nothing was harmed. Kaitlyn had a full blown meltdown when she learned the sprinkle cake she and Shelby made for her Papa was ruined. I mean, full out tears and screams of anger. It wasn't as if it happened a lot, and after today, it was warranted in my book.

  How do you handle that kind of a tantrum? She was sat on a small ‘time out’ stool in the doorway, facing away from the table where we sat and we let her cry it out. After a few minutes she was calmer, and came back into the room. She crawled up in my lap and fell asleep. I never knew I could hold this much love for someone inside me, not only towards my wife, but the sweet girl in my arms. My lil’ bit had my heart and I hoped she’d always know that.

  “Now that the badges aren't here, excluding Charles that is, and things are calm, tell me the truth. I know you were leaving something out of your story back there,” Doc said looking at Shelby. I raised my brow at him and looked towards her.

  “Shelby?” I questioned.

  “I wasn't hiding anything,” she said softly. Her hands were slowly rubbing her lower back and I frowned. “It's just-” she stopped and looked over at Kaitlyn, curled up against my chest. “If you hadn't have gotten there- I wanted to kill him. I wanted to squeeze the life out of that man for what he had done.”

  “Sweet Pea,” Doc shifted and spoke gently to her as I laid my hand on her thigh, squeezing lightly. “Look at me, Shelby.”

  When she looked up there were tears in her eyes. “I feel so ashamed,” she whispered.

  “No. You listen to me. You are not the only person to have those feelings. Shit. I've had them everyday since you were six. When I walked in your room that day-” he took a shuddered breath. “If Robert and Gabriel hadn't been there- Sweet Pea, I've wanted to rip his head off every day for the last sixteen years.”

  “But-”

  “No buts, dammit. That man was going to hurt our sweet little Kaitlyn and you. You did what you had to do. End. Of. Story. You were justified,” Doc said, his jaw tight with fury.

  “You have a right to defend your life, and the life of our children, baby,” I said softly, squeezing her thigh as I did. “I'd have done the same thing, or worse.”

  “I don't want to be like him…” she trailed off as she dissolved into tears.

  “You could never be like him, Sweet Pea. Never. You hear me? Never,” Doc said as he rubbed her back.

  Doc wrapped his arms around her and I had to close my eyes and lean my head back. Lord give me strength. If I get my hands on her father… there may be no stopping me.

  A few minutes passed before Shelby pulled back from him and wiped her face. She let out a small chuckle before she sighed.

  “I'm sorry. I'm okay now,” she said.

  I sat up, careful not to disturb Kaitlyn and kissed her temple. “Nothin’ to be sorry for, sweetheart.”

  Our silence was interrupted by frantic knocking on the back door. I stood, ready to pass Kaitlyn to Shelby, but stopped when I heard the voice on the other side of the door.

  “Um.. Papa, can- can I come in? Please?” Colton stuttered out. My phone rang as Doc jumped to his feet. I frowned and answered without looking answered. “Wh
at now?”

  “Hello to you too, jerkface,” Dani Lynn said.

  “Sorry. What's up?”

  Doc hurried to open the door for Colton. The kid came bounding in. He went straight to Shelby and hugged her so tight that she grunted in surprise. She pulled him on her lap and hugged him back just as hard. It took me a minute to realize Dani Lynn was calling my name.

  “Charlie!”

  “Shit, sorry. Hey, I thought you were keeping Colton since- ya know,” I said. I was trying to figure out what was going on here. How did Colton get here? Was something else wrong?

  “Uh, yeah well, he overheard chatting at the station when we dropped off Drew and Daddy's supper and took off out of here like his ass was on fire. I'm sitting outside. I followed to make sure he was okay. I wasn't thinking when I took them all inside. I’m sorry!”

  “It's okay. Shelby has him now. Thanks for everything today. We appreciate it,” I said, meaning every word.

  “Anytime, it's what family does. If you're all good I'm gonna get my horde and head home. If he and Kaitlyn want to come play at the center tomorrow, just drop them off. We’d be glad to have them,” she said.

  “Thanks. I'll let you know in the morning.”

  “Okay, night then.”

  “Night Dani Lynn, see you tomorrow.” I hung up and watched Shelby as she whispered softly to Colton. His worried gaze had ran over her face and moved back and forth between her and Kaitlyn so many times I was afraid he’d get whiplash.

  “Hey, bud.” When he looked up at me I gave him a reassuring smile. “They're both okay, I promise. Your Papa wouldn't let them out of bed if they weren't. Trust me.”

  “Damn straight,” Doc said kissing the boy on his head.

  “I-I was scared he- I was scared he’d hurt them,” Colton stuttered out his words. I saw Doc lean in and hug the poor kid.

  “No, it wasn't him. Just some mean men that- well-” Shelby seemed at a loss as how to explain what had happened without freaking him out more.