Love Means Everything

by Emma Easter

  “You can't just leave us here!” Leila exclaimed. “We don't know anyone around this place.”

  The man laughed harshly and then said, “What do I care? I did what I was asked to do. Please come down from my car. I need to leave now.” He exited the truck and ordered them to get out.

  Zainah and Leila pleaded with him to take them to the agreed location, but he refused. Finally, he became violent, pulling them out of the car forcefully. Zainah watched him speed away with a mixture of anger and dread. And then she remembered that their bags were still in the trunk of the truck. “That man drove away with our bags!” she cried out.

  “Oh no!” Leila exclaimed.

  “It's nighttime already,” Zainah said to Leila. “Where are we going to stay?”

  Leila glanced around the busy market, her eyes wide with fear. “We haven't been outside the camp for years, and the first time we leave the camp, we’re abandoned in the middle of a market at night, with nowhere to go. What are we going to do, Zainah?” she asked, her voice shaking.

  Zainah gathered her thoughts together and brushed away the fear that had wrapped itself around her. She said, “There’s only one thing we can do. And that’s to pray. We have to ask the Lord to help us now.”

  Leila looked uncertain as she took Zainah’s hand, but she closed her eyes anyway.

  Zainah lowered her voice, praying very softly so those around would not hear her. “Lord,” she began, “please help us. We have very little money and nowhere to go. We’re stuck in the middle of this market at night. We need a place to sleep until I can decide on the next move to find Faizan.” She whispered. “In Jesus’ precious name I pray.”

  Leila whispered a frightened sounding “amen.”

  Just as they opened their eyes, a woman she had never seen before touched her shoulder. The woman whispered in her ear, “I heard you praying in the name of Jesus just now. It’s not safe to pray in his name around here.”

  Zainah’s eyes widened in surprise. “How did you hear me pray? I was whispering.”

  The woman did not answer her question. Instead, she said, “You are a Christian, aren’t you?”

  Zainah nodded hesitantly.

  The woman whispered, “What are you doing out here at this time?”

  Zainah opened her mouth to answer, but the woman said, “Never mind. I was passing by and the Lord told me clearly to help you. You both need a place to stay, don’t you?”

  Zainah’s mouth fell open while Leila’s eyes were as round as saucers.

  The woman did not wait for them to answer. She said, “Follow me.” She started to walk away and Zainah quickly began to follow her. Leila walked beside him and whispered, “Are you sure we can trust her?”

  “We have no choice, Leila. Besides, I think the Lord really did a miracle for us. I believe he was the one who sent this woman to help us.”

  They walked for a long time. Zainah kept praying quietly while Leila clutched her hand. “Lord, I’ve decided to believe that this woman was sent by you because we have no choice. Please help us.”

  At last, the woman stopped in front of a field of flowers.

  Leila raised her brows and looked at Zainah. When Zainah asked the woman why they had stopped there, she did not answer. She parted the flowers with her hand and began to walk through them.

  Zainah and Leila followed. Soon, Zainah’s eyes widened in surprise as a small bungalow emerged as though by a miracle. The woman knocked, and a minute later a girl who looked about nineteen or twenty years old came to the door. She smiled when she saw the woman and opened the door wide. The woman stepped in and beckoned for Zainah and Leila to enter.

  Zainah stepped into the house tentatively and Leila entered behind her.

  Zainah looked around the room they’d entered. It was a simply furnished room with a single couch and a small TV set that sat on a wooden stand. Dark brown curtains shrouded the windows, and the cement floor was bare except for a small rug at the center of the room.

  The woman said to Zainah, “Welcome to my home. You can sleep here tonight and then tell me all about your mission tomorrow morning. I think the Lord wants me to help you with your accommodation, though it’s not that great,” she waved her hand around the room, “as you can see.”

  Zainah felt tears in her eyes. “Thank you,” she said to the woman. “It’s perfect. We didn’t know what to do when our driver left us at that market.”

  The woman nodded and said to Zainah and Leila, “Come and take a shower, and then I’ll show you to the room where you both will stay until you are ready to leave.”

  As they lay in bed after the simple meal the woman had given them, Zainah said to Leila, “God is so good. See how He helped us by sending a stranger? And now, she said we can stay as long as we want to.”

  Before she drifted off to sleep, Zainah lifted up a prayer of thanksgiving to the Lord, and then prayed for wisdom to know what step to take next in order to find Faizan.

  *****

  Faizan walked into the doors of the New Day Fellowship Church. He had started going there the year before. On his first day, he had gone with Audrey and Trisha. He clearly remembered how excited they were to take him to their church. He’d been excited as well, and a little nervous as he had never attended a formal church service before. But his nervousness hadn’t lasted, as the church members had made him feel right at home. Plus, he had enjoyed the service tremendously. Now, a year later, it wasn’t just Audrey or Trisha’s church, it was his church.

  He walked through the carpeted foyer, greeted some of the ushers who were welcoming people into the church, and walked into the main sanctuary. He walked down the aisle of the church, and took a seat in the third row. Service had not fully started. Some of the instrumentalists and singers were standing at the pulpit, checking the microphones and musical instruments. Looking around him, he noticed that the church was already half-full.

  He looked at the pulpit again and remembered clearly the day Pastor Mark had called him into his office and asked if he would give his testimony in front of the church the next Sunday. For the first time in his life, he’d actually been scared. What would the people in the church say when they found out he was a former jihadist? He’d asked the senior pastor for time to think and pray about it.

  For the whole week before the Sunday service, he had prayed earnestly. By Sunday, he knew without a doubt that the Lord wanted him to share his testimony. So he had, with fear and trembling, as the apostle Paul had said in the Bible. When, after service, people came up to him and told him that his testimony had blessed and encouraged them, he was relieved. Nobody had looked down on him or become afraid of him as he had feared. Instead, the opposite was the case.

  Since then, he had made acquaintances and friends in the church and he’d joined the welfare department. When one of the members of the department had asked if he wanted to join, he’d said he didn’t. He had been sure he wasn’t cut out for it. He had never cared much about other people’s welfare before he became a follower of Christ. The church member had asked him to pray about it and he had said he would in order to get rid of the man. In order not to lie, he’d said a perfunctory prayer when he got home and then promptly forgotten about it.

  The next day, however, he was reading his Bible when a verse from the book of James had jumped out at him: “Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.”

  He had been deeply touched by the words. He knew what it meant to be fatherless. Maybe if a Christian man had visited him and been a sort of father figure to him, he would not have followed the violent path he had. Mustafa had taken the role of a father and had taught him to hate and kill. All he could do now was become to someone what he’d never had—a godly role model. A man who loved God and was willing to show other young men and women how to do that as well.

  He had joined the welfare department that Sunday and had risen to b
ecome the leader now. His faith was growing stronger every day and his life would have been perfect were it not for the constant ache in his heart for Zainah.

  He sighed wearily and then pushed the familiar sadness and yearning out of his mind. He bowed his head to say a brief prayer before the service began and felt someone take the seat next to his. A sweet floral fragrance filled his nostrils and he unwittingly breathed it in deeply. He focused on his prayer and asked the Lord to speak to him as the service commenced. He also asked that God would use the service to draw him closer to Jesus.

  He opened his eyes and turned to smile in greeting at whoever it was that was sitting beside him. A blonde he didn’t know very well except for the fact that she was an old friend of Ken’s, smiled brightly at him.

  “Hi… Faizan?” the blonde said.

  He nodded, surprised that she knew his name. He’d seen her from afar here in church a few times. Once, he had spoken briefly to her when she came to the house to see Ken, but it was only to tell her that Ken wasn’t in town. “Hi, umm… I’m sorry, I can’t remember your name,” he said.

  “Lauren,” she replied in a soft voice.

  “Yes. Lauren. I should have remembered.”

  Lauren opened her mouth to say something just as the worship leader asked everyone to rise up to start the praise and worship session. Faizan turned away and focused his attention on the worship leader. As the singer raised one song after another, he lifted his hands with the congregation and worshipped from the depths of his heart. The presence and the love of God surrounded him, and the euphoria did not lift until the service was over two hours later.

  After the closing prayers, Pastor Mark asked everyone to greet the person next to them. Faizan turned and only then fully remembered Lauren was beside him. He smiled at her and shook her hand.

  He started to turn to greet the man on his left side, but Lauren said, “Sorry, but I’m a hugger.” She grabbed him before he could say anything and hugged him tightly.

  She drew back and he turned to greet the man briefly. He bent down to pick up his Bible from his seat. When he straightened, he was surprised to find that she was still standing there, looking at him.

  “You are a member of the welfare department, aren’t you?” she asked.

  “Yes,” he answered. “What department are you in?”

  “Umm… I haven’t yet joined any. Do you enjoy serving in your department? I was thinking of joining it.”

  He smiled widely and nodded. He was always on the lookout for new members. “I definitely enjoy serving in the welfare department. I’m the leader now, actually. I think you’ll like it if you are ready to visit as many members and visitors as you are assigned to.” He looked at the back of the church where he had seen his assistant moments before and then turned back to Lauren. “You can get a form from Sarah over there,” he pointed at his bespectacled assistant. “We have our meetings here in church on Thursdays at six o’clock in the evening. You are welcome to join us.”

  He began to walk away and pointed at Sarah again. “Remember to get a form from Sarah before you leave, Lauren.”

  Lauren touched his arm and stopped him. “Umm… is Ken around? I might stop by today.”

  “No… he and Audrey left for Miami this morning.”

  Lauren looked disappointed. “Oh.”

  Faizan started to walk away again, but Lauren said, “Will you be in church when I come on Thursday?”

  He gazed curiously at her. “Yes, I will be. I have to as the leader of the department.”

  She nodded while he wondered why she’d asked him that question.

  “There is no need to be nervous, Lauren. We are all nice people at the welfare department. I think you will enjoy serving with all the members. I’ll see you later.” He left quickly before she could stop him again. He had to get home and figure out a way to at least talk to Zainah again. His sanity and future happiness depended on it.

  *****

  Zainah spent every day looking through Facebook profiles, trying to find anyone who was related to Phil Gardner. She’d had a severe culture shock for a few days after she and Leila had arrived at Fatima’s house—the widow who had taken her and Leila in. After she confided in Fatima about her mission, the soft-spoken, middle-aged woman had told her she could start with social media.

  “What is social media?” Zainah had asked.

  Fatima had laughed out loud and then stared at her with a quizzical expression. “You don’t know what social media is? Facebook, Instagram…?”

  Zainah had stared dumbly at her and then said she had never heard of those things.

  “Wow!” Fatima had exclaimed. “You have been totally isolated. How long have you been living at that camp?”

  Zainah had already told her about the women’s camp she and Leila came from. Zainah answered, “I’ve been living there since I was eighteen. This is the first time I’ve left the place since I was taken there eleven years ago. Well, except for when we had to change camps…”

  “But how did you get your basic needs met if you never left the place?” “Miriam, the oldest woman in the camp, went to town about twice a month to get everything we all needed. We agreed to do that to keep the location of the camp secret. Since most of us came from places where we were severely persecuted for our faith, it was a necessary thing to do so we would not be found by anyone who hated Christians or wanted to harm us in any way.”

  Fatima nodded. “I understand that. Around here, people know we are Christians, but we are treated with derision and not allowed to speak publicly about our faith in Christ. Once in a while, someone has threatened us, but so far, the Lord has kept us safe.”

  Zainah looked round the bedroom she and Leila shared and then curiously asked Fatima for the whereabouts of her friend.

  “She went out with Safia, my oldest daughter. Don’t worry about it. She’ll be safe with Safia… Unless…” Fatima looked up with a thoughtful expression on her face.

  Fear gripped Zainah. “Unless what? Is Leila in trouble?”

  Fatima smiled and shook her head. “It’s nothing. She will be safe.”

  “But where did they go?”

  “Ehm, Leila told Safia she was tired of staying indoors and Safia decided some fresh air and a long walk would do her good.” Fatima smiled. “Now, stop worrying and let me show you how to search for people you want to find on Facebook.” She chuckled and then shook her head. “What I meant to say is that my son, Samir, will help you. I have to admit that I am quite useless with these social media platforms. My kids tend to help me if I need to do anything on them.” She called out to Samir, a sprightly boy who looked about thirteen.

  That had been days ago. Now, Zainah had mostly learned how to navigate Facebook after Samir helped her open an account and taught her how to use it to find whoever she wanted. But, in spite of her diligent search, she’d not found what she was looking for and frustration was already setting in. To make matters worse, Leila was never here now. She went out with Safia every single day.

  Zainah tossed aside the cheap cellphone Fatima had gotten her in frustration. She got up from the bed and paced the almost empty room. She clasped her hands together and said, “Lord, how am I going to find Faizan? Please help me!”

  Why did I think it was going to be easier than this to find Faizan when I was at the camp? Even without knowing there was such a resource as social media, she had believed the Lord would do a quick miracle and that she would find him almost immediately. But she’d gotten nowhere with this social media search. She had to change her methods.

  The door suddenly burst open and Leila skipped into the room. She unwrapped her scarf from around her shoulders and tossed it onto the bed.

  Zainah’s mouth fell open with shock and then she closed it again. “What are you wearing, Leila?” Zainah asked, staring at her friend with her eyes wide. Leila was dressed in a long, very tight, striped dress with no sleeves. All her curves were on full display in the dress.

 
Leila shrugged. “It’s Safia’s. All the young people are dressed like this now.”

  Zainah stared at her, wondering if she had lost her mind. “Firstly, you aren’t young enough to be wearing this… and nobody in their right mind should be dressed like this anyway . . . with all their curves on display.”

  “Calm down, Zainah. I wrapped my scarf around my body. Besides, you are shocked because you are so used to completely covering up in our camp. Here, in the outside world, people are a bit freer with their dressing. You would know that if you left this house.”

  Zainah shook her head. “I know how free people can be in the outside world. I just need you to be careful. And you are never here these days.”

  “I’m always careful.” She sighed and sat down on the bed beside Zainah. “I still haven’t given up on my dream to find a husband and have children. I won’t find one by sitting in the house. You are lucky because you’ve already found the man you love and want to spend the rest of your life with. I don’t have that yet. I want that with everything in me.”

  Zainah smiled sympathetically at Leila. “I don’t think just going out to random places will help you find a husband. I think you should keep praying about it and the Lord will bring you someone who loves you the way He brought me Faizan.”

  “You know things don’t usually work out that way, Zainah,” Leila said. “Faizan literally fell down from the sky for you.”

  “That’s not funny!” Zainah said, and then chuckled in spite of herself.

  “But he did fall down from the sky. And I wasn’t trying to be funny! You are blessed, Zainah. Sometimes, I get a little jealous.”

  “Maybe we should change places then.” Zainah sighed. “You can be the one who falls madly in love with someone you haven’t seen or heard from for more than a year. When you have experienced that kind of misery, then come back and tell me about how blessed I am.”

  Leila put her hand on Zainah’s arm and said softly, “I’m sorry. You still haven’t found Faizan or anyone who might be related to him on that Facebook thing?”