Karma of Kalpana

by T. L Smith

  My warships were irresistible as lures. Gardner let us remain long enough for the Punitraq to counter our sideways attacks. I questioned this strategy, but Gardner insisted upon continuing it. The Punitraq had proved themselves creatures of habit, so she was making our routine a habit.

  Still, it felt wrong, especially today. Standing on the bridge, I watched the battle as an overwhelming sense of dread crept over me. I couldn’t tell if it was my talents, but it shook me to the bone. “Everett, break off this assault. Something’s wrong. Look…” I pointed to a weakened area in the offensive line. “…that shouldn’t be happening, right?”

  “No it shouldn’t. I’ll get reinforcements moving in.” Everett took his eyes from the board for only a second. “Are you sensing something?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe…” Suddenly more fighters wavered in the line. The hole opened up wider. My heartbeat sped up and panic set in. “Sync out of here. Sync! Sync now!”

  I shouted the order too late. Whatever assailed our pilots was a fast moving wave, aimed at my ship. It spread out across my bridge. Several officers fell to the floor. Their bodies jerked with violent seizures. Others stood as if stunned into paralysis, even Everett.

  I grabbed his arm. “Blocks, reinforce your blocks…” He gripped my hand in return and I could see he fought something unseen. It was all he could do to stay on his feet. I pulled free, jumping into the control pit. I pushed the immobile com officer out of his chair. “Engage Sync!” I shouted across the space to the fleet, but I knew my ship and the affected pilots couldn’t get away. The Punitraq were after us… me.

  I watched as our other warships made the leap, followed by most of my fighters, leaving the rest of us defenseless. The Punitraq were quick to take advantage and swarmed my disabled fighters. “NO! NO! Damn you, Sharmila! What have you done to us?”

  I almost leapt from the com seat as a small voice echoed in my head. “The companions need full control, if your people are to survive.” I turned to Everett. “Surrender to your companion. The Elders need control.” I opened the com line again, shouting the same order to my fighters, out through my ship, to every EH. I repeated the order until I felt a hand on my shoulder. When I spun my chair around, Everett gave me a single nod, but I could see in his eyes it wasn’t him.

  “He is still here, buried deep enough the Puni can’t hurt him. Prepare yourself. It is our time now.”

  Sharmila’s voice grew inside me, but I still couldn’t sense anyone. “They won’t find you until it is time.”

  “So this is a…” The words caught in my throat. She was stronger than ever, silencing my tongue and thoughts.

  “Not all have broken their hold, so watch how you speak.”

  I kept my lips sealed and watched as my fighters regained control. Around the bridge the crew stopped seizing, but most were too weak to resume their stations. I relinquished my seat to the com officer, who still shook, but was alert.

  “Order all unaffected personnel to report to their duty stations and relieve those unable to continue. Those affected need to report to medical…” I put my hand over his as he started to open the lines to transmit my order. “First notify medical I want those worst affected heavily sedated, as they’re susceptible to further attacks.”

  “Yes Ma’am!” The man’s real soul was buried for his protection, but his companion mimicked his personality, sitting straighter in his chair, to not be ordered off the bridge.

  Everett took the weapons post while we waited for relief crews. An officer ran onto the bridge, looking at the chaos. His eyes went to the battle screen as he jumped over the navigation officer, taking his seat. “Continue…” I spoke, but Sharmila put her words into my mouth. “Continue defensive posture, prepare to fire, but hold...”

  A monstrous ship closed on us, pounding at our shields, thinking us disabled and abandoned by our fleet. This close I could see the hard lines, abundance of weapons and battered hull from prior attacks. How many worlds had they come up against? “All crew, brace for hard maneuvers!”

  Sharmila held her final orders, until it looked like we could reach out and touch their ship. The seconds grew tenser. Our shields were taking a beating, about to fail, when her voice called out. “Roll in and fire!”

  The Nav Officer swung our ship back on them, so close we nearly became a battering ram. Everett opened fire. At this close range, our weapons penetrated their shields and cut a black swath along their underbelly. Everett continued firing and their aft drive-duct collapsed, followed by a massive implosion.

  Nearly scraping ships, hull-to-hull, the Nav Officer fought the controls to pull us away. Heat glowed through our attacker’s rear section, the scorching radiance spread forward from the tail of the ship, melting the hull away faster and faster, until the ship disintegrated into pieces of molten shrapnel.

  On the outside, my ships’ shielding deflected the projected fragments, millions of high-velocity razor-sharp shards thrown out into endless space. The total destruction of one of their warships raised the EH back to their feet and their companions drove them to hit the Punitraq harder than ever.

  Sharmila recalled our fleet and I watched as we hammered the enemy, driving them back. Support ships fell in behind us to retrieve our disabled fighters. Sharmila’s words poured from my mouth as she took her old command seat, her throne.

  “Let them see what we’ve been holding back!”

  “No, that’s not the plan.” Gardner had recovered, what little bit of the Elder gene had made their attack painful, but not completely debilitating. She stood defiantly across the bridge. “It’s your plan to drive them back to their home world. To wipe them out, once and for all.”

  “That’s correct.” Everett’s Elder spoke up. “This attack changes nothing, except to disclose that they possess formidable talents. We must continue with your plan, Primary.”

  Sharmila’s strength was overwhelming, as was her anger. Nothing compared to what I’d experienced before. She looked to Everett, at his Elder within. “Then it is time to stop this game of Hit-and-Run, as the commander calls it.” She shifted her gaze to Gardner. “Proceed with the next level of the plan. Hit them with everything. Push them into a full retreat.”

  Gardner was angry too. I couldn’t feel her emotions, but I could see it in her face, in her determination. Sharmila could feel it and was willing to use it. “Make them pay for our losses.”

  It worked, that wicked smile etched into her face. A controlled mean streak she reserved for the worst of her enemies. Somehow I knew they were few and far between, and survivors of her wrath were non-existent. “You have no idea how much I’ve been waiting for this moment.” Gardner reached over the com station. “Commence Retribution.”

  Everett’s companion complied with her order. Warships we’d kept hidden behind the support lines appeared. Thousands of new pilots were unleashed. Their combined weapon fire sent enemy debris disintegrating against our shields. The larger wreckage of the ship we’d killed finished breaking apart. It tumbled out into black, forever to be a graveyard of this war.

  The battle crept on for hours. One by one, their disabled ships were added to the graveyard debris. Pilots and crew cycled forward to keep up the pressure. I lost track of how long we fought. If my men were tired, they probably didn’t feel it, any more than I did. Our bodies were no longer our own to control.

  Beneath Sharmila’s iron-fisted grip, I worried she pushed too hard. If the offensive turned against us again, we might not have the strength to stand up to it. To my relief, before exhaustion overwhelmed our physical bodies, the Punitraq broke.

  They turned and fled into FTL. For a second I thought Sharmila would follow, but she remained seated, a smile on her face, my face. “Com, contact the third team to begin pursuit. If they even look like they’re dropping out of FTL, hit them again.”

  The com officer nodded. “Orders confirmed.” Five warships slipped into Sync, tracking the Punitraq energy trails.

  We remained wh
ere we were while we retrieved our pilots and ships, destroying everything else. “All EH who were engaged in battle, take a mandatory rest period.”

  “Yes, Ma’am!” The com tech started transmissions.

  Sharmila looked at Gardner. “You as well, Commander.”

  “Yes, Primary.” She bowed her head. That angry smile was wiped away with exhaustion, but she was still standing erect. A true warrior.

  Sharmila stood from her command chair and Everett was quick to join her, holding out his hand as she stepped down. Everett’s hand, but his companion’s will. She took his hand and I felt how hard she gripped it. I knew she was tired too, fighting to remain in control. She sensed me watching her. “Yes, it was a difficult task, but I will be stronger for the next confrontation. We all will be.”

  Everett guided her off the bridge and to our quarters. As soon as the doors closed and she’d eased herself into the sleeping cushions, she released me. Everett was released as well and I thought he would fall to his knees. He caught himself, leaning against the wall as he covered his face with both hands and slid to the floor. He didn’t speak or look at me. Whether it was exhaustion or anger, I couldn’t tell.

  Just as I thought he passed out, he let his hands fall. “What the hell was all that?”

  “Sharmila and the Elders were waiting for them to show their psychic hand. To see if they had abilities.” I wanted to sit up, but no energy remained in my body. “Obviously they do. I feel like I’ve been beat to hell, but you look worse.”

  Everett could only nod his head. “Since our companions were able to break their hold, clearly we’re stronger than these creatures, especially together. But I think our companions require a lot more energy than we produce.” Everett struggled to force himself to his feet. “I hate to think what our pilots feel like.” On his feet, he moved to the desk, leaning across to activate the com unit, ordering meals.

  “I can’t eat. I don’t even have the energy t—"

  “An order is an order.” He went to our personal stash of snacks, pulling out drinks. “If we’re going to let our companions lead the way, then we have to be physically able to deal with the requirements.” He collapsed beside me and shivered involuntarily. “There’s no way I want to go up against them without my companion between us.”

  “It was bad?” I hadn’t been hit, not with Sharmila isolating me.

  “There aren’t words to describe it.” He pressed his head into the cushions, his arms folded to add pressure to his forehead, but I could see his eyes moving behind closed lids, flinching from the nightmare playing in his head. “Human, EH, we’re capable of some pretty ugly stuff, but a few seconds of contact with them…it’s like they grabbed hold of my worst nightmare, then pulled it up through my skin. They enjoy the torture.”

  He turned his head gingerly to look at me and his eyes radiated pain. “I’d rather die before letting them get hold of me again. If I’d had a gun, I would have used it, but Sharmila interceded until my companion got control.”

  “I’m glad she thought to help you first, but she still won’t let me use my talents. I hate being cut off from you.”

  “She’s protecting you.” His face couldn’t hide his anguish. “I’m a soldier and I can’t get the pictures out of my head.” He eased over to drape an arm over me. “I never want you to see what they stirred up. When this is over, she’ll give you back to me.”

  “I hope so.” I laid my head on his shoulder.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

  Food and sleep were the immediate needs of the EH, but after a day of recovery, there came a demand for answers. With all the work we’d done with the Elders, they never told us they could assume such total control. We were grateful they interceded, but some now felt wary of the Elders becoming too attached to our human bodies.

  Blocked from my abilities, I had to rely on Everett to address our soldiers’ concerns. He had to rely on his Elder. Letting his companion be interrogated, through him. I sat in the huge conference room, the blanket of mental silence drawn around me. Limited to only watching and listening.

  EH officers from each ship represented their squadrons, broadcasting the meeting to all the members. One commander spoke for them all. “We appreciate our companions breaking up that attack.” He looked to his fellow officers. “We’re disturbed that this ability to take total control was never disclosed. Despite claims that to do this violates their moral codes, we need to understand this, before we go on.”

  “To intervene without permission violates free will.” Everett’s voice was distant and lacked any emotion, under the full influence of his companion. “We did not want harm to come to our children, but we could not share this ability, unless it was necessary. Unless the Puni posed such a threat.”

  “But now we know, and before the end of this war, we’re assuming we’ll again be expected to surrender our wills completely to the Elders.” He turned to look directly at me now. “We need to know we won’t be taken over completely, as has happened to Malant Ghiya. She has clearly become more Elder than EH and that does not look reversible.”

  Pointing me out so deliberately was like a knife in my chest. I could no longer hide the obvious markings on my skin, the icier silver of my eyes or the long white streaks in my hair. I held up a pearlescent hand between myself and the room. “What was done to me was a different process. They went to extreme measures to assure their Primary survived the millennia. I didn’t volunteer, but did what destiny demanded of me.”

  Putting my hand down, I choked a bit on my words. “Just like all my other lives, I didn’t have a choice. And just like all my other lives, I won’t recover from this. But you are free to choose this union with your companions. You will be free when this is done. I won’t. This is my destiny, to make the sacrifice.” To be sacrificed. I didn’t say that out loud and was glad no one could hear my thoughts right now.

  The commander studied me for a moment. I couldn’t feel his thoughts, but the color of his eyes was expressive. The coldness in them slipped to sympathy, which only made me feel worse. I didn’t want anyone feeling sorry for me.

  Everett’s Elder broke up the awkward moment. “Many of you fear the Elders will remain in your bodies when this is done. It is impossible. The Elders are pure energy. Any physical body they tried to assume over a long period would be consumed far faster than the host’s normal life expectancy. Mortal death is not… attractive to us.”

  The Elder continued. “Consider that we exist in a nearly eternal state. Our deaths would be instantaneous. There is simply no point.”

  “Unless you seek to die? All beings can have individuals with suicidal tendencies.”

  “Suicide is a mortal ailment, not an immortal one.” Everett looked upwards, as if looking out beyond the ship’s hull and into infinity. “There is one unifying theory for all our species. Energy and matter never truly ceases to exist. It transforms itself.”

  Elder forms appeared as Everett continued to speak. “Each of us once possessed physical bodies, but transcended. Even the beings you see before you now are not us, but the manipulation of matter to provide a visual presence. If we were to ever reach a point of existence where we no longer wish to remain...” Everett’s hands went up, fingers interlaced. He unwound them, slowly parting in two. “…our souls would return to the eternal crèche to be cleansed and reborn.”

  One hand fluttered away, leaving the other. The sparkling lights faded out. “The remaining energy is absorbed into the universe. Possibly into a nearest star nursery, to create a new world, a new possibility of life.”

  A pleasing smile crossed Everett’s face. “So death has no true concept for us, as individuals. Our death only results in life. Life is energy and energy never dies. It only transforms. However, to ‘take over’ another’s life, would be abhorrent to us, as we would interfere with their own eventual path of growth or ascension, as well as our own. That is not our individual will or right.”

  The EH looked amongst themselves. T
hey had heard pieces of this philosophy, but the confusion of this conflict made them question it. They needed to hear it all put together and said out loud. They had to understand the pointlessness of such an action.

  The commander seemed to accept this information. He circled the room before coming back to stand before Everett. “We all agree we face a formidable enemy. One we could not fight on our own, no matter how many soldiers from this new Collective are sacrificed. We’ll continue with this mission, but there will always be a shadow of doubt, of fear, that we might end up under the rule of the Elders. It is a risk we take to save all our galaxies from the Puni.”

  “The destruction of the Punitraq is our only mission. Any extended interest in our children, once this war is over, is to pass on the knowledge we have saved for you, your true birthrights.” Everett bowed to the commander.

  The commander accepted the Elder’s comments. He slipped around the table to where I sat. “My comments weren’t intended as an insult. None of us can imagine what is happening to you, physically or mentally. We respect that you didn’t ask for this, but are standing up as the Primary. Many weaker souls would have been crushed by the responsibility.”

  “Thank you.” I was glad Sharmila made it impossible for anyone to read me. Otherwise he’d sense how scared I was that when the war was done, I’d be as gone as the Elders. “Now that we have these issues hashed out, we can discuss the change in the mission plan.”

  “Yes, Primary.” He returned to his seat and I called in Gardner. I shared Sharmila’s reasoning for the change of tactics. Our hit-and-runs had inflicted enough damage on the Punitraq that they switched to their next best weapon to subdue us. Psychic energy.