Breaking Tessa: A College Sport Romance

by T Christensen

  Tessa relaxed back down into her bed. Lindy lay down next to her, and they both stared up at the ceiling. Tessa’s mind was no longer cloudy with shock, and her insides started folding inward and twisting around. She turned her head and looked at Lindy with watery eyes.

  “What am I going to do?”

  She took her hand. “You’re going to talk to Jordan.”

  “I know, but not today. He just won the national championship.”

  “How far along are you?”

  “It happened before Thanksgiving, so about four months.”

  Lindy looked at Tessa, her eyes shining with love. “You know I’m here for you, right?”

  A couple of her tears fell. “I know.”

  __________________

  Chapter 33

  __________________

  “You have to tell him, Tessa,” Lindy said fiercely into the darkness a couple of weeks later as they were waiting for sleep to claim them.

  “I know,” Tessa agreed.

  The tension in the air was palpable. She knew Lindy was waiting for her to go on, but there wasn’t anything else she could say. While she appreciated her support, she needed to do this in her own way and in her own time. When she felt her eyes boring into her, Tessa gave in.

  “I will, Lindy. First I need to make sure I can do this on my own.”

  Lindy’s frustration was evident. “You don’t need to do this on your own, Tessa. You shouldn’t do this on your own.”

  Tears filled her eyes for about the millionth time since she had discovered she was pregnant. She was exhausted from trying to keep them in while avoiding Jordan and planning her future.

  “You should hear him, Lindy.” Tessa said wistfully. “Jordan is on top of the world after winning the championship. It sounds more and more like he will be the number one draft choice. I can’t be the one to ruin his future.”

  Her voice cracked. When she heard feet padding across the floor, she scooted over to make room for Lindy. After they linked hands, Lindy said in a heartfelt whisper, “I can’t even imagine how hard this is, Tessa. But why is it okay for you to suffer by yourself? There was more than one of you in that bed.”

  “I know. I’ve always known our relationship wouldn’t last beyond college, and I want Jordan to know I can do this on my own. I have two interviews for teaching positions. Once I have a job, it can be his choice to be involved or not.”

  There was a long silence. Even after Tessa’s explanation, Lindy was still frustrated. “I don’t agree with anything you just said, but this is your decision, and I will support you.”

  Tessa prayed her interview tomorrow would result in a job. She didn’t know how much longer she could live in limbo.

  _________________________

  Tessa left the interview confident that it went well. She crossed her fingers, hoping she would get the job. It was about time something went her way.

  She didn’t have to wait long. The principal called the next day, offering her a job as a fifth-grade teacher. It was in a district that would make her commute an hour each way, but Tessa wasn’t able to be picky. She planned to get her own apartment closer to the school as soon as she saved up enough money.

  With some of the stress off her shoulders, Tessa turned her attention to telling Jordan she was pregnant. Rather than waiting and worrying about what to say, she got in the car and went to his house.

  _________________________

  She was standing in front of the pool house and staring at the door. The worry Tessa had managed to bury on the way over was back with a vengeance. The churning in her stomach made her feel like she had swallowed harsh chemicals.

  For the first week after Tessa had found out she was pregnant, she’d managed to avoid any face-to-face contact with Jordan. She talked to him on the phone or through text. It wasn’t difficult. His life was even crazier since winning the championship.

  Toward the end of the second week, Tessa could hear the suspicion in his voice when she kept finding excuses to not see him.

  By the third week, she couldn’t hold out any longer. They met on campus for lunch. As soon as Tessa saw Jordan, she threw herself into his arms. The worry, anxiety, and stress bubbled up in her chest, and she had a hard time not bawling all over him. When they finally drew apart, worry creased Jordan’s brow.

  “What? What’s wrong? What can I do?”

  Tessa gulped down the emotions as she laid her head back on his chest and closed her eyes while she told a partial lie.

  “Nothing’s wrong. I just missed you.”

  She felt Jordan exhale his relief, and he tightened his arms around her. “I missed you too. Can we go to my place?”

  Yes sprung to her mouth, and she had to bit her lip to hold it in. “No time. I have to work in a couple of hours.”

  Now all she had to do was knock on the door in front of her, hope Jordan was home, and pray the right words came to her to tell him she was pregnant. Tessa had been so caught up in not overthinking what she would say that she hadn’t checked to see if he was there.

  She reminded herself that she had a plan if he didn’t want anything to do with the baby. Her hand moved to the bump she’d started to hide with baggy clothes. Tessa would be there for him or her, just like her mom had been for her. She could do this.

  As she knocked on the door, her heart pounded in her chest. A mixture of dread and relief filled her when he didn’t come to the door. Tessa wasn’t sure she had enough courage to go back.

  She tried one more time and knocked harder.

  “Tessa, he’s not home.”

  She gasped and spun around. Mrs. Davis was right behind her.

  “Oh.” She deflated and then gathered herself together to ask, “Do you know when he’ll be back?”

  She looked at her quizzically, and her gaze drifted down and landed on Tessa’s stomach. When Mrs. Davis’s eyes narrowed in on her hand, she quickly dropped it.

  The air froze between them, the tension thick. Tessa forced a shaky smile to her lips. Praying for a steady voice, she told her, “I wanted to surprise him.”

  Mrs. Davis kept her gaze on Tessa before she finally said, “Come up to the house, Tessa. We never get a chance to talk.”

  The refusal was on her lips, but Mrs. Davis didn’t wait for an agreement. She was already turning away and striding up the walk toward the house. Tessa reluctantly followed. Her heart beat so hard that she could feel her head pounding.

  Her gut told her to run, and Tessa desperately wanted to listen. The only reason she didn’t was her hope that Jordan would return soon.

  She followed her through the house until they ended up in an office. Mrs. Davis sat behind an old mahogany desk. Tessa warily took a seat in front of the desk, her instincts on full alert. This didn’t seem like a get to know you kind of place. It was a place to conduct business.

  Mrs. Davis’s first question had her slightly lowering her guard. “How are you doing, Tessa?”

  It wasn’t full of concern, but it seemed like a genuine question. “Good. Busy.”

  She nodded and leaned back in the high-back leather office chair. “So, tired?”

  Tessa answered truthfully, “Yes.”

  “Not always feeling the best?”

  Tessa froze, and she tried to reign in her panic. Mrs. Davis was watching her like a hawk. She fought to keep a neutral expression on her face, but breathing was difficult. Tessa gripped the arms of the chair to keep herself from running.

  “Why would you ask that?” The question came out shaky. Tessa cursed herself for showing weakness.

  Mrs. Davis leaned her forearms on the massive dark wood desk. “Let’s be frank, Tessa.”

  Tessa increased her grip on the arms of the chair, but she didn’t say a word.

  “You are pregnant,” Mrs. Davis said bluntly.

  The air was pulled out of the room, and Tessa’s vision blurred. She brought her elbows up to the arms of the chair and dropped her head into her hands. By the disgust on Mr
s. Davis’s face, it was clear how she felt about it.

  “And now you are going to try and convince Jordan the baby is his.”

  That sneered statement got her attention, and Tessa shot her head up as she responded forcefully, “It is his.”

  “How can I be sure?”

  Tessa was shocked into stillness.

  Mrs. Davis continued like her silence was all the confirmation she needed. “We are a wealthy family, dear. This scheme is not a new one. With Jordan’s promising career in the NBA, it is expected that you would want to ride on his coattails.”

  “I have never been with anyone other than Jordan, and I can assure you I don’t want your money. I’m here to give him a choice. I have a job, and I can support this baby myself. But Jordan is the father, and he has a right to know.”

  Tessa stared back defiantly at her and let her read the truth in her expression. Her face slowly relaxed, and she nodded. Tessa breathed out a little of her tension. Mrs. Davis believed her.

  “Okay. Then let’s talk about your choices.”

  The tension snapped back into place. What was she talking about? Tessa’s brain whirled. She sat as still as prey, hoping the hunter wouldn’t come after her.

  “You could keep the baby, give it up for adoption, or end the pregnancy.”

  Mrs. Davis watched her with narrowed eyes as she raised a finger for each option. Tessa still sat motionlessly.

  She continued, “Having the baby would hurt Jordan’s career.”

  Tessa discreetly sucked in some air. “What?”

  The condescending, exasperated shake of her head made Tessa feel two inches tall. “Think, Tessa. Right now, Jordan is the golden boy. Teams are fighting for him. What happens if word gets out that he is having a baby with a girl he is not married to? What happens if you give up the baby he knew nothing about, and the press gets a hold of the information?”

  The words Jordan had said when he’d discovered they hadn’t used a condom crept back into her head.

  “The press will wonder what else he is hiding and start digging, and some reporters will make things up. Now the questions arise. Is he as outstanding as we think? Will he bring bad publicity to our team? Is he worth the risk?”

  Tessa closed her eyes to think about what she had said without her probing, judgmental gaze boring into her. But she couldn’t escape. Mrs. Davis went on.

  “Jordan won’t be the golden boy anymore, or a sure thing. Will he be distracted? Of course he will. He has a pregnant girlfriend, and he can’t play without distractions like he could before.”

  Each word made her breath harder to come by. Tessa tried to think past her pounding heart that was breaking into pieces.

  Everything Mrs. Davis had said was true. Did she want to be the reason Jordan’s dream was destroyed or derailed? Of course the answer was no, especially since they’d never talked about the future. Tessa hadn’t expected them to last past college, and Jordan hadn’t voice any plans. Mrs. Davis’s next words buried any hope she had for them.

  “Think about what his life will be like, Tessa. He will be a millionaire, and that comes with responsibilities. He will need a partner at his side. Can you be that person? Do you know how to run a party or even be at a party? Will you be in a corner or even worse, at his side mumbling like an idiot who is unsure what to say or do? Do you want to embarrass him or help him?”

  She was right. Tessa couldn’t even be at a fundraiser given by his family without praying Jordan wouldn’t abandon her. What would she do at a star-studded event? Any hope she’d had coming in here was crushed.

  There were tears in Tessa’s eyes when she finally opened them, but she refused to let them fall. She was an adult, and it was time to make difficult adult decisions.

  She locked eyes with Mrs. Davis, who nodded. “I’m glad you understand there is only one real choice.”

  Tessa didn’t speak. She didn’t know if she could. There were so many crushing emotions rampaging through her. Tessa used everything she had to lock her muscles in order to control her trembling and keep the tears at bay. She refused to let Mrs. Davis know this conversation was destroying her.

  Tessa gripped the arms of the chair so tightly that she couldn’t feel her hands. She tracked Mrs. Davis pulling open the drawer in front of her. She set a checkbook on the desk, and it felt like the rug had been pulled out from under Tessa.

  Every thunderous scratch of the pen was a dagger to her heart. She watched in a daze through blurry eyes as the pen moved across the check. The ripping was like the blast of a cannon.

  Mrs. Davis set the check in front of her, and suddenly Tessa could hear the desk clock ticking. She stared at the check like it was a snake getting ready to strike her. Her brain was shutting down, but the snap of her name made her drag her eyes up to the devil.

  “Tessa.”

  Mrs. Davis was a blur. It was like a cloud had formed between them. Each word she said resonated in Tessa.

  “After you leave this room, my family and I will never see you again. If you attempt to see Jordan or talk with him, I will sue you for slander and ruin you and your family. This conversation never happened, and I would suggest you not test me on this. I have brought people to their knees for far less.”

  She was vaguely aware of Mrs. Davis walking toward the door. All she could do was stare at the check in front of her and think about what it meant.

  “You have two minutes to leave this room and my home. If you are not gone, I will have someone escort you out.”

  The air returned to the room as soon as she left, and Tessa gulped it in. She reluctantly took the check in front of her, standing up and walking out as quickly as her shaking legs would carry her.

  Part two of the duet, Jordan’s Justice, coming soon!

  (Hopefully by December 15, 2020)

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