Book Read Free

Selected Poems

Page 8

by Thomas Lux


  Goofer-Dust

  (dirt stolen from an infant’s grave around midnight)

  Do not try to take it from my child’s grave, nor

  from the grave

  of my childhood,

  nor from any infant’s grave I guard – voodoo, juju, boo-hoo rites

  calling for it or not! This dust, this dirt, will not

  be taken at dawn or noon

  or at the dusky time,

  and if you approach

  this sacred place near midnight,

  then I will chop,

  one by one, your fingers off

  with which you do your harm. Goofer-dust: if you want it,

  if you need it, then

  erect downwind from a baby’s grave

  a fine-meshed net

  and gather it

  one-half grain, a flaky mote, an infinitesimally small fleck

  of a flake at a time

  and in such a way

  it is given to you

  by the day, the wind, the world,

  it is given to you, thereby

  diminishing the need to steal

  this dirt displaced by a child

  in a child’s grave.

  The Ice Worm’s Life

  is sun-avoiding, and by burred flanks

  they wriggle through the glacier

  which they’ll never leave

  nor ever meet ice worms of a neighboring glacier.

  To them is the unexamined life

  worth living? By day

  a few yards in/under ice

  and then wild nights, wild nights

  on the glacier’s surface

  where to them the wind brings pollen, fern spores,

  and the algae

  that tint the blue frozen water red. The ice worms gorge,

  they gorge, thousands of them,

  in the dark, in the cold, aspiring to grow

  from one-tenth of an inch

  to four-tenths of an inch.

  All night, the glacier a lawn

  of them bent by the wind, and by dawn

  they’ve gone down into the ice to sleep,

  to mate, until it is time

  to ascend again: our refrigerative

  fellow creatures, our neighbors

  on the glacier beside ours

  who, if we could invite them into our living rooms,

  would decompose

  in fifteen minutes (that soon!)

  and go wherever their theology tells them they must go.

  Hospitality and Revenge

  You invite your neighbor over

  for a beer and a piece of pie.

  He says words inappropriate

  about your Xmas bric-à-brac.

  You shoot him, three times, in the face.

  While you complain to his first son

  re high off-white-couch cleaning costs,

  he shoots you in the face five times.

  At your wake, your first son pumps eight

  slugs behind his first son’s left ear.

  Your wife invites your neighbor’s widow for tea.

  Breakbone Fever

  On the femur a brick drops hard, from the top rib

  to bottom a steel

  bar slams, on neck bones and skull, on clavicle, the fever

  drops its stones, on the knuckles,

  the wrist bone; the carpals, both regular and meta-, they get

  cellar doors slammed on them. Oh the capitate, hamate,

  lunate, and pisiform bones take a bad

  beating: ball-peens bang

  and jackhammers

  jack against each one. Even some joints – interphalangeal

  agony! – ligaments, get this fever, go down

  with it; even fingernails, nerveless themselves, battered by it,

  and hair, hair enters the skull like a hot needle. Watch

  out, ossicular chain – hammer, anvil,

  stirrup, bones smaller than grains of rice

  in the ear’s pea-sized cave,

  full grown since birth, first to turn

  to ash, watch out – the pain there

  will tell you who owns the heat,

  who aligns the tenses – past, present, future, and none,

  will show you who owns the fishhook frictive verbs,

  who assigns the persons, places, and things,

  who islands the ocean, who affords the tree its rings,

  who owns, in fact, your blistering bones.

  Monkey Butter

  Monkey butter’s tasty, tasty,

  you put it in cookies and pie,

  you mix it in cake, I can’t tell you a lie:

  don’t be light with it, nor hasty

  to push it aside. It’s not too sweet,

  with a light banana-y hue,

  the monkeys all love it,

  and so will the one you call you,

  the you who’s another you want to love you.

  Put it in his pudding, in her pastry puff,

  then sweep the table of all that other stuff.

  Later, leave a little in his left, her right, shoe.

  Can’t Sleep the Clowns Will Eat Me

  (for Claudia)

  it says on the dead

  author’s (‘the author is dead’) daughter’s

  T-shirt. He sympathises with this line

  and his daughter who wears it,

  and recognises that its author (who also

  must be dead) wrote the line to describe

  and mock dread, insomnia, fear.

  The author, her father (continuing to be dead), buys

  the shirt for his above-mentioned child

  because she likes the line.

  The author (dead as a brick) is glad

  his daughter enjoys and understands

  the line, that it’s funny, parodic, odd.

  This pleases the author (a rotting corpse)

  and – forever, down the boulevard of elms and ash,

  forever beside the indeterminate river into the long night,

  forever with his child and their blood-on-blood – he will,

  he will be happy

  learning to live with being dead.

  Render, Render

  Boil it down: feet, skin, gristle,

  bones, vertebrae, heart muscle, boil

  it down, skim, and boil

  again, dreams, history, add them and boil

  again, boil and skim

  in closed cauldrons, boil your horse, his hooves,

  the runned-over dog you loved, the girl

  by the pencil sharpener

  who looked at you, looked away,

  boil that for hours, render it

  down, take more from the top as more settles to the bottom,

  the heavier, the denser, throw in ache

  and sperm, and a bead

  of sweat that slid from your armpit to your waist

  as you sat stiff-backed before a test, turn up

  the fire, boil and skim, boil

  some more, add a fever

  and the virus that blinded an eye, now’s the time

  to add guilt and fear, throw

  logs on the fire, coal, gasoline, throw

  two goldfish in the pot (their swim bladders

  used for ‘clearing’), boil and boil, render

  it down and distill,

  concentrate

  that for which there is no

  other use at all, boil it down, down,

  then stir it with rosewater, that

  which is now one dense, fatty, scented red essence

  which you smear on your lips

  and go forth

  to plant as many kisses upon the world

  as the world can bear!

  FROM

  God Particles

  (2008)

  Oh, to vex me, contraries meet in one.

  JOHN DONNE

  I do not remember our friend’s name, but he was a good man.

  RALPH WALDO EME
RSON,

  on leaving Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s funeral

  Behind the Horseman Sits Black Care,

  and behind Black Care sits Slit Throat with a whip,

  and on Slit Throat’s shoulders, heels in his ribs,

  there, there rides Nipple Cancer, and on her back

  rides Thumbscrew. No one rides Thumbscrew’s shoulders.

  Certain suicide, everyone knows not to try that,

  everyone, that is, who wants to get older.

  Even Pee Stain, the kid whose lunch money,

  instead of being stolen,

  he’s forced to swallow,

  even Pee Stain

  knows not to ride Thumbscrew’s shoulders.

  The Horseman (and, presumably,

  his horse) prefers none

  of this – Black Care with his arms

  around his waist as if he’s his girlfriend

  and those others stacked atop him

  like a troupe of acrobats, unbalanced.

  The Horseman desires a doorway,

  a cave’s mouth, a clothesline – or best: a low, hard,

  garrotey branch.

  The Hungry Gap-Time,

  late August, before the harvest, every one of us worn down

  by the plow, the hoe, rake,

  and worry over rain.

  Chicken coop confiscated

  by the rats and the raptors

  with nary a mouse to hunt. The corn’s too green and hard,

  and the larder’s down

  to dried apples

  and double-corned cod. We lie on our backs

  and stare at the blue;

  our work is done, our bellies flat.

  The mold on the wheat killed hardly a sheaf.

  The lambs fatten on the grass, our pigs we set

  to forage on their own – they’ll be back

  when they whiff the first shucked ears

  of corn. Albert’s counting

  bushels in his head

  to see if there’s enough to ask Harriet’s father

  for her hand. Harriet’s father

  is thinking about Harriet’s mother’s bread

  pudding. The boys and girls

  splash in the creek,

  which is low but cold. Soon, soon

  there will be food

  again, and from what our hands have done

  we shall live another year here

  by the river

  in the valley

  above the fault line

  beneath the mountain.

  Hitler’s Slippers

  were hand embroidered, first with a round, red

  rising sun, upon which, centered,

  was sewn the symbol – who would bow

  for long to such a crippled

  wheel? – by which his reign is known.

  Hitler’s slippers were a gift

  (someone else opened the package for him) from a mother,

  grandmother, who bent over them for months.

  She knew no other way to serve him, therefore, stitch

  by stitch she adorned his slippers,

  two-thirds of the Axis

  represented (ciao Italy already)

  to please the leader’s eyes when he slung

  his legs out of bed in the bunker

  to begin another day with dry toast,

  milk, and one egg, poached.

  Sleep’s Ambulance

  takes me to a quiet room down the long hallway, into the golden elevator,

  which whooshes me beneath – the wheat fields are stripped

  but the hay fields green – down to the many streams, estuaries

  like the veins on the back of a hand, flowing to the fingers’ tips

  and draining into the air beyond.

  Did someone turn a soothing siren on?

  I think I hear a siren. The factory whistle – Father’s home

  for supper before the evening shift? It’s something of a squeaky song.

  Happy little mice, I think, eating through a sack of bones.

  Lump of Sugar on an Anthill

  The dumb ants hack and gnaw it off grain by grain

  and haul it down to the chamber

  where they keep such things

  to feed their queen and young. The smart ants

  dig another entrance, wait for rain.

  Which melts the sugar,

  and through viaducts they direct it

  to their nurseries, the old ants’ home, the unantennaed ward,

  and so on – the good little engineering ants!

  The dumb ants have to eat their sugar dry.

  Put your ear to a dumb ant’s anthill’s hole–mandibles on

  sandpaper is what you’ll hear.

  The dumb ants pray it doesn’t rain before

  they’ve done their task,

  or else they will drown – in sweetness,

  but drown, nonetheless.

  Stink Eye:

  what the mongoose gives the cobra. The eye

  that says: be confident

  with your poison while

  I kill you with my teeth – nonvenomous,

  nor as sharp. Stink

  Eye: the slit-eyes of a boy

  on the trolley from Tijuana

  to San Diego, late, telling me: where you get off,

  I get off and rob you. Stink Eye: mine,

  saying to him, Good luck, fututor matris,

  which means motherfucker

  in Latin. My whole life I’ve been an educator;

  the children come to me

  to learn their ABCs.

  Stink Eye: the broken, bitter eye

  of spite – keep that eye from me, and

  furthermore, Lordy, Lordy,

  keep me from wearing that eye,

  which looks outward and leaks inward,

  eating first the brain

  on its way to eating the heart.

  Only these things: blindfolds, clouds

  of cataracts, sharp sticks,

  eyewash of acid, lids sewn

  shut, lids sewn open

  facing nuclear blast, every boy armed

  with a BB gun–only these,

  and one more hope as recourse

  against Stink Eye: hold

  the gray backside of a mirror

  to your face and return it

  to its sender.

  The Lead Hour

  A block of black salt sits

  on his chest and on that

  a block, a city block, of ice.

  Swallowed: one ton (metric) of metal shavings.

  In his pockets: every cannonball on earth

  except the ones glued in pyramids

  near cannons on town hall lawns.

  His wallet’s solid steel, size of a toaster!

  Like the men pulling the guy wires

  on the Hindenburg just before the spark

  was set: that same strength

  hauling his eyelids down.

  Two hours before dawn: the lead hour.

  Late afternoon, winter: the lead hour.

  He’s got his stone visor on, stone shoes,

  and granite cravat, a bag on his back

  full of hammers’ heads: ball-peen, claw, and sledge.

  Each finger held down by staples

  big as goalposts! Notwithstanding,

  after all, in any event – under it,

  under the lead hour,

  he works.

  The First Song

  was sung after the first stone was thrown at a beast,

  after a spear in a man’s hand

  brought down a pile of meat.

  Of course we sang of that!

  We hardly had a language and we sang.

  We sang the stories, which turned into better stories,

  which is why stories are told

  and told again. Then, when we had more time

  and bellies full enough with food,

  we sang of love. But it began


  with stones and sharpened sticks,

  then sharpened sticks hardened

  in fire.

  The General Law of Oblivion,

  Mr Proust called it: the beloved gone so long

  you forget what he/she looks like,

  no matter portraits, photos, or memory,

  which is the best tool for forgetting.

  Though one cannot deny

  its genius, Mr Proust’s prose

  kills me, it loops

  me over and out. Is it just French novelists

  who don’t know how to end

  a sentence and so love the semicolon (‘the period

  that leaks’) they can’t write two lines

  without one? And I am so godamned tired

  of hearing about that cookie!

  As if he were the first (first fish were!) to notice

  the powers of the olfactory! But

  about the General Law of Oblivion

  he had it zeroed: ‘It breaks my heart

  that I am going to forget you,’ he said

  in a last letter to a friend.

  The length and music of that sentence

  is perfect, in English or in French.

  Midmorning,

  accompanied by bees

  banging the screen,

  blind to it between them

  and the blooms

  on the sill, I turn pages,

  just as desperate as they

  to get where I am going.

  Earlier, I tried to summon

  my nervous friend,

  a hummingbird, with sugar

  water. The ants got there first.

  Now, one shrill bird

  makes its noise too often,

  too close: ch-pecha, ch-pecha-pecha.

  If he’d eat the caterpillars

  (in sizes S to XXL!) eating my tomatoes,

  we could live as neighbors, but

  why can’t he keep quiet

  like the spiders and snakes?

  I spoke to an exterminator

 

‹ Prev