Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles

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Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles Page 33

by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka


  nudging

  parental support

  power of “no,”

  safety issues

  venturing out

  Breaking off

  Breaks, as anger management strategy

  Breathing exercises

  Briggs, Katharine

  Bulldozing

  changing to persuading

  persuading compared with

  Bullies

  Button-pushing statements

  Capability, assurance of

  Cars, behavior in

  Cautious first reaction, in children

  Changing the frame

  Checking rituals

  Chess, Stella, Dr.

  Child temperament

  activity level

  adaptability

  coaching tips

  first reaction

  goodness of fit

  intensity

  persistence

  profile

  regularity

  sensitivity

  Cleaning rituals

  Clothing tips, for sensitive children and

  Coaching, benefits of

  Communication

  language problems

  nonverbal

  of standards

  Competency

  acknowledgment of

  assertiveness

  boundaries

  getting along with others

  independence

  in stressed-out kids

  Connection, significance of

  Consequences

  assertive behavior and

  importance of

  Consistency, importance of

  Cooke, Betty, Ph.D.

  Cooperation

  Coping skills, See also Problem-solving

  Cortisol levels

  Counting rituals

  Covey, Stephen

  Criticism, dealing with

  Cues

  body

  listening to

  sensitivity to

  for temper tantrums

  Curiosity, Emotion Coach response vs. Intimidator

  Cutting, Beth

  Daydreaming

  Death, impact of

  Decision making, connecting vs. disconnecting

  Deep breathing, temper tantrums and

  Defiance

  Dependent behavior

  Depression

  Developmental milestones

  Diabetes

  Diamond, Marian

  Disagreements, dealing with

  Disharmony

  Disrespect

  Disruptions, dealing with

  Distractions, temper tantrums and

  Divorce

  Doherty, William

  Dominating parents

  Drug addiction

  Ear infections

  Eating disorders

  Effective parents, characteristics of

  Embarrassment, identification of

  Emotional abuse

  Emotional development stages

  Emotional intelligence

  Emotion coach

  characteristics of

  connection with children

  intimidator vs.

  memories of

  responses of

  role of, see specific types of skill development tips for

  Emotion coaching, see Emotion coach

  defined

  goal-setting

  impact of, generally

  tips for

  Emotions

  assertiveness and

  coping skills

  family history and

  identification of

  intensity, management strategies

  monitoring

  naming

  power struggles and, generally

  recognition of

  relationships, impact on

  self-motivation

  teaching children about

  triggers, identification of

  understanding

  Empathy advice

  child’s point of view

  cues, listening to

  gut reactions

  resentment toward child

  sensitive responses

  successes and

  tips for

  worries and advice

  Encopresis

  Encouraging parents

  Erickson, Martha Farrel, Dr.

  Etiquette rules

  Excitement, Emotion Coach response vs. Intimidator

  Exhaustion, impact of

  Expectations, dealing with

  Extracurricular activities

  Extroversion

  characteristics of

  coaching the extrovert, See also Extroverts, coaching guidelines

  determination of

  preference for

  success plan

  Extroverts coaching guidelines, see Extroverts, coaching guidelines

  factual parents

  feeling parents

  Extroverts, coaching guidelines

  overview

  when they need activity and interaction

  when they need questions to help them think

  when they need to talk

  Eye level communications

  Falling apart over seemingly insignificant things

  Family bed

  Family values

  Fear

  identification of

  impact of

  Fearfulness

  Feelers, see Extroversion; Introversion

  characteristics of

  coaching, see Feeling children, coaching guidelines

  extroverted parents

  gender differences

  introverted parents

  Feeling children, coaching guidelines

  assertiveness

  find solutions that feel right

  reassure them that they’re liked

  teach them to look at the facts

  validate their feelings

  Feelings, see Emotions

  awareness of

  clarification of

  confirmation of

  expression of

  naming

  real, search for

  stress cues

  validation of

  vulnerability

  Feeling style

  Fetal alcohol syndrome

  Fight or flight response

  First feeling

  First reaction

  in children

  in parent

  Follow-through, significance of

  Forgetfulness

  Foster care

  Frustration

  Fuel for power struggles

  medical factors

  normal development

  overview

  stress

  temperament/type

  Gabrieli, John, Dr.

  General anxiety disorder

  Giving in

  Goal setting

  in relationship building

  standards and

  stress management

  Goleman, Daniel

  Goodness of fit

  Gottman, John

  Grocery store, stopping strategies

  Growth disorders

  Growth spurts

  Guilt

  dealing with

  identification of

  Gut reactions

  Habits

  Handwashing rituals

  Harmony

  Heart of Parenting, The (Gottman)

  High-activity children

  Highly intense children

  Highly persistent children

  Highly sensitive children

  Hitting

  Hitting behavior

  Hoarding

  Holiday, stress and

  Honesty

  How to Raise a Child with a High EQ (Shapiro)

  Indecisiveness

  Independence

  Individual differences

  acknowledgment of

  adjusting boundaries for

  Individual needs, understanding of

&nb
sp; Ineffective parents, characteristics of

  Information processing

  Injustice, identification of

  Insensitive parents

  Instinctual responses, recognition of

  Intensity

  awareness of

  in children

  management of

  in negotiations

  in parent

  reduction strategies, see Intensity reduction strategies

  stopping strategies

  stress cycle and

  Intensity reduction strategies

  changing the frame

  learning effective strategies

  monitoring feelings

  overview

  setting standards

  tips for

  Intentional Family, The (Doherty)

  Interpretations

  empathic responses

  standards enforcement

  Interruptions

  Intimidation, impact of

  Intimidator

  anger, physiology of

  emotion coach vs.

  impact of, generally

  responses of

  Introversion

  characteristics of

  coaching the introvert, See also Introverts, coaching guidelines

  negotiations and

  preference for

  success plan

  Introverts coaching guidelines, see Introverts, coaching guidelines

  factual parents

  feeling parents

  Introverts, coaching guidelines

  overview

  when they need an opportunity to watch or listen

  when they need space—physically, verbally, and visually

  when they need time for reflection

  Intrusive parents

  Irregularity, in children

  Jealousy, Emotion Coach response vs. Intimidator

  Jessen, Lynn

  Journal of American Medical Association

  Jung, Carl

  Justice, value of

  Kohn, Alfie

  Kranowitz, Carol

  Language problems

  Learning disabilities

  Lethargy

  Limit-setting

  Listening

  escalation and

  introverts and

  problem-solving and

  Losing Control (Baumeister)

  Loss, identification of

  Lovies, letting go of

  Low-activity children

  Low-persistence children

  Low-sensitivity children

  Magic Trees of the Mind (Diamond)

  Magic words

  Manipulation

  Medical factors

  anxiety disorders

  assertive behavior and

  attachment disorders

  attention deficit disorder (ADD or ADHD)

  autism

  coaching tips

  depression

  encopresis

  Medical factors (cont.)

  evaluation guidelines

  focus on child

  as fuel for power struggle

  identification of

  invisible

  language problems

  negotiation and

  obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)

  pervasive developmental disorders (PDD)

  seeking help for

  sensory integration dysfunction (SI)

  support and encouragement, significance of

  team approach to

  Medical practices, invasive

  Mental-health days

  Mildly intense children

  Mistakes, acknowledgment of

  Mixed messages

  Motion sickness

  Motor mouth

  Moving, impact of

  Myers, Isabel Briggs

  Myers-Briggs Type Indicator

  Name calling

  National Institute of Mental Health

  Needs, search for

  Negotiation

  childhood experiences of

  coaching tips

  giving in distinguished from

  importance of

  intensity, management of

  listening skills

  medical factors and

  mistakes, acknowledgment of

  with other children

  problem, description of

  problem solving

  process

  solutions

  stress level and

  temperament and

  value of

  Neural static

  Neuroscience

  New situations, dealing with

  No, power of

  Nonverbal communication

  Normal development, fuel for power struggle,

  Nudging

  Nurturance, stress level and

  Observation skills, in introverts

  Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)

  Out-of-Sync Child, The (Kranowitz)

  Overstimulation

  Parental fighting

  Parent-child relationship

  building, see Relationship-building strategies

  instinctual responses and

  as process

  reciprocity in

  resentment in

  significance of

  Parent temperament

  activity level

  adaptability

  coaching tips

  defined

  first reaction

  importance of

  intensity

  parental, types of

  persistence

  regularity

  sensitivity

  successes with

  trigger traits

  understanding

  Pausing, as anger management strategy

  Persistence

  in children

  impact of, generally

  in parent

  Persuading

  bulldozing compared with

  changed from bulldozing

  Pervasive developmental disorders (PDD)

  Physical abuse

  Physical activity, temper tantrums and,

  Point of view, child’s

  Potential solutions, in problem-solving

  Power struggles, generally components of

  coping with, see specific types of skill development

  threads in, see Fuel for power struggles

  Praise

  Predictability

  benefits of

  temperament and

  Preschool age children

  assertiveness in

  thinking and feeling styles

  Preventive actions

  Problem, description of

  Problem solving

  decision making

  follow-through

  importance of

  problem, description of

  solution

  steps to

  working together on

  Professional guidance, need for

  Projection

  Psychobiology

  Psychological type theory

  Public behavior, standards enforcement

  Punished by Rewards (Kohn)

  Pushing/shoving behavior,

  Questions

  for extroverts

  for introverts

  thinking children

  Quick-to-adapt children

  Rage

  Raising Your Spirited Child

  Raising Your Spirited Child Workbook

  Receptive-expressive language disorder

  Reciprocal parents

  Reciprocity

  Reflection time

  Reframing

  Refusing behavior

  Regressive behavior

  dependence

  difficult separation and disrupted sleep patterns

  falling apart over seemingly insignificant things

  fearfulness

  forgetfulness and indecisiveness

  lethargy and apathy

 

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