Pieces of Me

by E. L. Todd

  “I’m always ready for ice cream.” She smiled before she walked out.

  Together, we headed toward the elevator.

  “Just let me say goodbye to my father first.”

  “Okay.” I remained by the elevator. “I’ll wait here.”

  She gave me a sad look like she wanted to protest.

  I stared at her blankly, quietly telling her nothing she said would change my mind.

  She entered the office and shut the door behind her.

  I leaned against the wall and crossed my arms over my chest.

  Conrad grabbed something from the printer than came my way. “Babysitting?”

  “Something like that.”

  He was better than he used to be, but also worse. His eyes were heavy and lidded, like he was fighting to keep them open, only he wasn’t tired. He didn’t carry the same confidence he used to, and his movements were more sluggish. Now that he conquered his true problem, he seemed to take a dramatic hit. “Glad you guys are working it out.”

  “Yeah…we’ll get there eventually.”

  “Is she just as moody with you as she is with me?” he asked with a slight smile.

  “No, she’s been pretty good. I’m taking her out to ice cream right now.”

  “Good,” he said. “That will keep her happy.”

  “I know my wife,” I said with a shrug.

  He nodded. “Well, I’ll see you later.”

  “Con?”

  “Hmm?”

  “You know, I’m always here to talk if you need someone. I’ve been heartbroken a few times. I can relate pretty well.”

  He stopped making eye contact with me. “I’ll keep that in mind.” He walked away with his face directed toward the ground.

  Skye returned a moment later. “Still want that ice cream?”

  “Sure.”

  ***

  Skye got a cookie sundae and demolished the entire thing the second she got it. It was a miracle she kept the fudge and whip cream off her face. She tossed the spoon into the bowl when she was finished. “I wonder why they don’t make a bigger size.”

  I didn’t make a joke or tease her. Being pregnant must be stressful, physically and emotionally. She was probably self-conscious about how much her body had changed in the past few months. “Not sure.”

  “You only ate two bites.”

  “I’m not much of a sweet-tooth.” My body was in its prime and I didn’t want to mess that up. When I came home from my trip, Skye was even more attracted to me than she usually was. So I kept up my image as much as possible.

  “So…you aren’t going to eat it?”

  I smiled then pushed the cup toward her. “It’s all yours.”

  She finished what was left then stacked it into her bowl. “Ta-da.”

  “Congratulations. A very worthy accomplishment.”

  She rubbed her stomach like she was full. “Why did they have to put this place so close to work? It’s dangerous.”

  “They just put a bakery next to my gym.”

  “That’s just mean,” she said. “Why would they do that?”

  “I don’t know…but they have good muffins.”

  He laughed. “So, they suckered you in?”

  “Maybe once or twice…” I grabbed the bowls then tossed them in the garbage. “Ready to go home?”

  “Yeah.”

  We left the parlor then made it to my truck. After I got her in the passenger seat, I headed home. We didn’t talk when we were in the city, but once we were on the open road in Connecticut the conversation unfolded.

  “Conrad seems…down.”

  “He’s pretty miserable. It’s like Lexie just left him.”

  “He’s been repressing it for so long.”

  “Yeah…” Her voice carried a twinge of melancholy.

  “Worried about him?”

  “I just wish none of that ever happened. Conrad was happy and so full of life. Now he’s just…a different person. You can see the bullet holes everywhere, even through his clothes.”

  “He’ll pull through, Skye. Prestons always do.”

  “I just…” She shook her head.

  “What?”

  “What the hell was Lexie thinking? She was with him for almost two years, and when he decides to propose she dumps him? I mean, who does that?” The sadness disappeared from her tone and anger replaced it. “Conrad is like a brother to me. And no one messes with my brother.”

  “It looks like we’ll never know why she said no.” I remembered the letter Roland kept and wondered if we should hand it over to Conrad. Or maybe we should at least read it and see what she had to say.

  “If she ever sets foot in that office I’ll kick her ass.”

  I didn’t doubt that. “I’m sure she won’t come around again.”

  “She better not. And if she does, Conrad better not even think about taking her back.”

  I approached the house and pulled into the driveway. “It’s been a few months now. I don’t think Conrad would ever go back to her. Maybe right after it happened but…not now.”

  “He deserves someone better.”

  I had a feeling that Conrad would be a terminal bachelor from this point onward. And I didn’t blame him. The two times he gave his heart away it was crushed. He wouldn’t go down that road again.

  Skye and I approached the front door. I knew I shouldn’t stay because it rushed our relationship too much, but I also hated leaving. There were times when I wanted to stay and never leave, like right now. Having ice cream with her reminded me of our old relationship. It was becoming more difficult to stay angry with her and keep at her at a distance because I was remembering why I fell in love with her to begin with.

  “Would you like to come inside?” she asked. “I know we just had ice cream but I could make dinner.”

  I missed my evenings with her. Like clockwork, we’d have dinner at the table then lay together on the couch. Sometimes we would take walks on the beach, and sometimes we would make love in front of the fireplace. But we weren’t ready for that. “No, I should get going. But thank you.”

  “Okay.” She didn’t argue with me, which I appreciated. But she looked devastated that I rejected her invitation. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Good night, Cayson.” She never made a move to touch me or show affection. She always waited for me to make the move, probably because she didn’t know what I wanted.

  I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her. I touched her more often, but our affection hadn’t escalated yet. Hugging and handholding was all we could handle right now. “Good night, Skye.”

  ***

  When I approached my door I saw Scarlet standing in front of it.

  Her long brown hair was in loose curls, and her high cheekbones and full lips reminded me of Skye. Their features were similar, and any stranger could spot the resemblance between them. Skye had the same grace as her mother. She held herself with elegance, being classy and poised.

  I didn’t have a problem with Scarlet. Hesitation was in her eyes, and she always intervened when Sean and I fought. She at least gave me the benefit of the doubt, and she never said a single mean thing to me. “Hey, Scarlet. Can I help you with something?” If she was here Sean wasn’t far behind. He would never leave her alone in the city. He was too anal for that.

  “Hey, Cayson. How are you?” She hugged me like she always did, giving me a touch that reminded me of my mother.

  “I’m okay. What about you?”

  She pulled away and pursed her lips. “I’ve been better…”

  I knew exactly why she was there. “Would you like to come in?” I didn’t want to have this conversation but I wasn’t going to throw her out in the hall. I might despise Sean but I cared about Scarlet.

  “Sure. Thank you.”

  After we stepped inside she took a look around my apartment. She examined the empty kitchen and the living room with more chairs than I would ever need. “It’s nice.
You like it here?”

  “It’s not home but it does the trick. Would you like something to drink?”

  “No, thank you.” She held her purse over her shoulder and stood in her stilettos. She wore a maroon dress with sleeves.

  “So, what’s up?” I grabbed a beer from the fridge and took a drink.

  “You know why I’m here…”

  “Yeah, I figured it out the second I saw you. If you were anyone else, I would tell you to walk away and not waste your time. But, you’ve always been sweet to me so I’ll let you say what you need to say.”

  She regarded me silently, mulling over my words as she considered a response. Everyone though Sean was the smart one in their family. He was the billionaire CEO, but in reality, Scarlet had all the brains. It’s where Skye inherited it. The only thing she got from Sean was his stubbornness. “Then how about I skip all of it?”

  This was a new tactic. “Sure. Saves us both some time.”

  She came closer to me, but stopped five feet away. She didn’t invade my space like Sean did. He always tried to put me in his shadow, pinning me down so he could appear taller. Scarlet had a much different approach. “I know you love my daughter and you’re going to be with her for the rest of your life.”

  “We’re working on it.”

  “I know,” she said. “But that’s what’s going to happen. Just wait and see.”

  I took another drink of my beer.

  “So, if Skye is your life then Sean comes with the package.”

  “Unfortunately…”

  “Do you think Skye wants this? For you to hate her father?”

  “Probably not. But I don’t care what she wants.”

  “Yes, you do,” she said firmly. “When this rough patch is over you’ll go back to being the obsessive and devoted husband like you were before. And you’ll want to give her the world—on a silver platter.”

  “I’m not going to make up with Sean just to make her happy.” I was willing to do a lot to make my marriage work, but that was something I wouldn’t compromise on.

  Scarlet crossed her arms over her chest. “You’ve known Sean your entire life. You know he’s crazy, obsessive—”

  “Compulsive, psychotic, controlling…yeah.”

  She didn’t seem offended. “But you still respected him.”

  “Well, he hadn’t done anything to me at the time.”

  “No, you respected him because he has a heart of gold underneath all the flaws. And those flaws only exist because he cares so much about everyone around him. I know what he did to you was wrong, but you didn’t see things from his point of view. He loves Skye very much, and when she pointed the finger at you and said you were guilty, Sean took her word. Did you honestly expect him to do anything else?”

  “Yes.”

  Her eyes narrowed.

  “Did you take her side immediately? Did you point the finger at me and condemn me?”

  She was quiet because she knew she had no argument against that.

  “Exactly.”

  “But Sean thinks with his heart, not his brain. He cares so much that it consumes him. He makes bad decisions sometimes because he’s emotional. He held Skye in his arms while she sobbed her heart out. I admit he should have gone about it in a different way, but he’s just protective when it comes to his kids.”

  “He told me I was one of his kids.”

  Her lips fell into a frown.

  “I asked him to believe me but he refused to. I asked him to have a little faith in me but he said no. Instead, he told me to never look at him again. He threatened to kill me if Cortland wasn’t my father. Then he turned his back on me and walked away. If you expect me to sweep that under the rug then you must think I have a terrible memory.”

  Scarlet released a quiet sigh. It was so low I could barely hear it. “I live with him, Cayson. I’m with him all the time. Believe me, you’re all he ever thinks about. All he wants to do is make this right. He’s not looking for forgiveness to ease his guilt. He just wants his son back. He’ll do anything and everything to start over. Please remember all the good things about him before you immediately cut him out.”

  I was having a hard time remembering a single good thing about him.

  “Your father refuses to speak to him.”

  At least he was on my side about this.

  “And that hurts Sean too—even though he understands it.”

  That wasn’t my problem.

  “And your father said he and Sean would never be friends again until you forgive him.”

  “Then it looks like Sean lost two people from his life.”

  Scarlet didn’t react at all. “Cayson, I know you aren’t a cold person. I know you’re full of forgiveness, compassion, and humility. You aren’t perfect, but you’re pretty damn close. Sean said he was sorry and he’ll keep saying it as long as you need to hear it. My husband is a complete mess over this. If you have any respect or love for Skye, please find it in your heart to let it go.” She came closer to me, pleasing with her eyes.

  “He sent you here to do his dirty work.”

  “No, I came because I can’t stand to see him like this anymore. He’s been better ever since you gave Skye another chance, but he’s totally distraught over losing you. Cayson, you will never understand how much pain he’s in. He keeps telling me he lost a son.”

  I turned away because I couldn’t look at her anymore. The emotion in her eyes was making me feel weak. It was hard to deny a woman that looked so similar to Skye.

  “Please.”

  I closed my eyes for a moment because I didn’t like the pleading tone in her voice. “Scarlet, I just don’t feel the same way anymore. I don’t trust him, and whenever he says something kind to me I have a hard time believing his sincerity after what he did. I’m sorry.”

  She turned her eyes to the ground. “There was so much love before all of this…”

  “That doesn’t change what happened. I needed him. I needed him to make Skye see reason. Instead, he punched me in the face and told me to never look at him again. He threatened to kill me.”

  “He was just upset—”

  “He would never say that to Roland no matter how upset he was.”

  She released another sigh.

  “Scarlet, I’m sorry. I can’t go back to what we were, not for you. Not even for Skye. I’m not keeping him away from Skye or my son so you don’t need to worry about that. But I don’t want a relationship with him.”

  She turned away like she was trying not to cry.

  “I know you forgave him for a lot of things he did when you first met…but not everyone has that same kind of compassion.”

  She kept her back to me.

  “I’m sorry, Scarlet. I really am.”

  She stayed still for a long time, just breathing. Then she headed to the door without showing her face. She didn’t say another word to me as she walked out of my apartment. When the door was closed, I thought I heard a loud sniff.

  But it could have just been my imagination.

  Chapter Six

  Slade

  “Dad, what’s up?” I walked into the apartment I grew up in.

  Dad was just getting a beer out of the fridge. “Knock. You don’t live here anymore.”

  “If you don’t want people to walk inside, lock the door.”

  “If you don’t want me to break in your skull, shut the hell up.” He grabbed another beer and handed it to me. “You look like shit. Did you shower today?”

  Actually, I just left the penthouse. Trinity and I got rough and nasty and I didn’t think about showering. “I was with the wife.”

  Dad rolled his eyes before he sat down at the table. “You could at least clean up a bit.”

  “Well, I was in a hurry to get over here.”

  “Why?” he asked. “You have something important to say?”

  “Very.”

  He gave me a hard look as he waited for me to spit it out.

  “So, you’re a dad.�
�

  “Yes…I’m a dad.”

  “Well, I’m having a kid. I need your help.”

  “Need my help?” he asked. “What are you talking about?”

  “You’re the best dad I know, Dad. I need parenting advice.” I pulled out my phone so I could make some notes.

  “I’m the best dad you know?” A slight smile was on his lips.

  “Yeah, you had Silke and I and we’re the most amazing people on the planet. What did you do? What’s your secret?”

  “There’s no secret, Slade.”

  “Come on. Yes, there is. Look at me.” I pointed to my chest. “I’m, like, the most perfect kid ever.”

  “I wouldn’t say that…”

  “And Silke is pretty cool too. You obviously did something and you need to tell me what it is.”

  “Well, your mother was involved. You remember her, right?”

  “But you’re the dad. And I’m going to be a dad. You get what I’m saying?”

  Dad drank from his beer.

  “So, I need to know everything. When I was born what did you do?”

  “How do you mean?”

  “When I came out of mom what’s the first thing you did?”

  “Held you…” He raised an eyebrow. “What else would I do?”

  “But then what? How did you know when I was hungry? When I was uncomfortable? Stuff like that.”

  “I just learned from being around you. Slade, I know being a first time parent is scary but it’s really not that bad.”

  “But what if I raise a serial killer?”

  He shrugged. “It could happen but it’s very unlikely.”

  “But what if it does?”

  “I don’t know…turn him in?”

  “Dad, I’m being serious.”

  He laughed. “Slade, there’s no secret to being a good parent. You just love your kids. Love them with everything they got and make sure they know that. That’s it.”

  “You’re oversimplifying it.”

  “I’m really not.”

  I remembered my childhood vividly. Dad and I did cool stuff together, but when I was in trouble he disciplined me. “What about when they are bad? Whenever I was in trouble you just talked to me. You only spanked me once.”

  “Well, talking is the best way to communicate.”