Beach Reads Box Set

by Madden-Mills, Ilsa

  My mother was weeping freely as she stood and searched my eyes for forgiveness before her and my father agreed to give me away. I eagerly hugged her as she held me tightly in her arms and pulled back to tell me I was a beautiful bride. We shared a smile before Jasmine stepped in to take my bouquet while wiping the tears from her eyes.

  Breathless and overwhelmed I turned to face my groom, my heart alight with love and acceptance I could never have dreamed up. Ian and I stared at each other, filled with unconditional love as we promised our lives to one another, our hearts united in our place of peace, where we began the dream that had become our reality.

  * * *

  Later at the reception under our star-sprinkled sky, Ian pulled me onto the porch full of guests and we slow danced to Cyndi Lauper’s “Time after Time”.

  “You made me choose the song,” he whispered, “I think it’s fitting.”

  “So fitting,” I whispered. “I can’t believe we just got married, crocky.”

  “I can’t believe you wore those damned gold sandals,” he said, pulling me closer and rubbing his nose against mine.

  “Of course you can. You sure you’re up for this? You ready to be a Home Depot dad again?”

  “I’m up for whatever happens. I can’t believe you’re mine.”

  “I can’t believe you’re building us a house.” We both turned to the framed skeleton sitting where our sand alley used to lay. The only thing finished was the expansive deck and that had only happened days ago as a request from a bride to a groom for her wedding day. The width of the house took up both lots that our houses used to dwell on. Ian planned to repurpose some of the wood from the old houses to add character. I think a part of him was just as sentimental that a cherished part of our childhood was gone, and it was his way of incorporating our past into our future. It had taken us close to a month to get back to the island and far longer to handle the desolation that surrounded us. The day we arrived in St. Thomas, Ian proposed to me in front of our wrecked houses amongst the scattered remains all over our beach. He wanted to turn one of our most miserable days into the happiest, and he managed it on bended knee with the question of forever and future promises pouring from his beautiful lips. We spent our days helping with the cleanup and our nights catching up. Our love paved the way through the endless wreckage that once was our paradise. We lived off love in the worst of conditions and nearly a year later, we were beginning to see some semblance of our dream. The day we broke ground on our new house, I started to plan our wedding.

  I danced with my husband as Cyndi sang our love’s lullaby thinking about the past year and the ones ahead of us.

  “This is everything I had hoped,” I said, feeling tearful. “Gah, I’m so emotional lately.”

  Ian’s smile deepened. “You think maybe that’s a good sign?”

  “No,” I said with a sigh. “Dr. Z said it will probably take a while with being on birth control so long and then there are my asshole ovaries.”

  “Have faith, beauty,” he said. “We have time, plenty of time.”

  “I know, I’m not worried about it. I just gained a teenager.”

  “She’s just agreed to stay for the summer, and she keeps eyeing that kid who lives a few streets over,” he shook his head, “let the good times roll. Remember new wife of mine, no boys, those are the rules.”

  “I have equal say now and you just made it so. I think it’s time for her to date.”

  Ian winced as if I’d punched him. “Are you kidding me? No way.”

  “She’s plenty old enough and she’s probably going to start with or without your consent. So, you might as well give her a little freedom.”

  “Are you purposefully trying to give me a fucking heart attack on our wedding night?”

  “Don’t die just yet. I need your sperm.”

  He scoffed. “How romantic.”

  “And I’m horny. We should go fuck while everyone is dancing.”

  Ian’s eyes bulged. “Do you hear yourself right now?”

  “What? Like your mouth isn’t ten times worse. Besides, it’s the hormones,” I whispered. “We can make all the sweet wedding night love later. Now come see to my needs, Pleasure Prince.”

  I yanked at his hand as he laughed loudly behind me. “Oh, my God, woman, I love you so damned much.”

  Behind his back, I signaled Ella the okay as she pulled her island crush toward the dance floor and mouthed. “Thank you.”

  Giving her the thumbs up, I smiled inwardly as Ian stomped enthusiastically through the sand toward our half a house. Minutes later, my back against the wood frame, my dress was around my waist, Ian drove into me as I bit into his shoulder to stifle my moans.

  “I could do this forever with you,” he whispered as he cradled me in his palms, holding me tightly to him.

  “That’s kind of the point of the day,” I whispered against his neck, “we get to do this forever.”

  He pulled back to gaze down at me, slowing his pace as he thrust in, the feel of him too much and not enough. There was nothing funny about the look in his eyes.

  He stopped his movements and leaned down kissing me so tenderly, tears surfaced.

  “My beautiful wife,” he dipped in. “I never thought I would be this happy.”

  “Ian.”

  “I love you so much, baby,” he said making me ache and filling it all at once. “So much.”

  Connected on every level, he gently pushed in again filling me over and over as I clung to him, our labored breaths mingling as we sank into a slow rhythm until I came apart, my body shuddering as he kissed me again and again, his tongue tasting, taking, savoring as he slid it gently against mine.

  His body tensed as I leaned in and whispered, “I love you.” He let go then, his frame shaking as he let out a long breath. He pulled back as we stared at each other in wonder, neither of us taking a single second for granted. It was a testament to what we had to look forward to, a collection of minutes, hours, days, weeks, months that would turn into years of the same love we both thrived on. His excitement matched mine as we shared our happiness with a smile and then sealed it with a kiss underneath the stars we unveiled for the other.

  * * *

  Koti

  Eleven months later…

  Ella smiled between us sensing our shared secret before her eyes lingered on her father who gave her a reassuring nod.

  She lifted her hands. What’s the news?

  Ian grabbed my hand and we beamed at each other before we both turned to Ella. “We’re pregnant.”

  Ella’s smile disappeared, her face twisting in agony as she lifted her hands to sign.

  Excuse me.

  She shot up from the table unaware her water glass had spilled. I managed to catch it before it hit the floor and shattered and looked up to see Ian try to stop her with a hand on her arm while she tried her best to pull away. When she finally managed to get free, she began frantically signing.

  “No,” he spoke and signed in unison, “You’re signing too fast. Slow down or speak.”

  Her face twisted as her broken voice sounded out breaking both our hearts. “Congrats, Ian, you finally get a child of your own.”

  “What?” Ian paled as I sucked in a breath.

  Tears flooding her eyes, Ella leveled us both with her next words. “I know you’re not my father.”

  Ian flinched as Ella faced him head-on.

  “I’m deaf, not stupid, remember? You’ve been telling me that my whole life. Hey, Ian—”

  “Stop calling me that!” He was smashing his hands together as he signed, pain twisting his features.

  “Fine, Dad, how could you think I wouldn’t know? Haven’t you ever seen a picture of Daniel?”

  Ian closed his eyes and I could feel the shatter in his chest from a foot away.

  “I look just like him!” She was screaming, her voice faltering in heartbreak as she continued. “I have his face, his eyes! I’m not an idiot. All those months ago when you were sad, wh
en you first came to St. Thomas, I saw you crying when you thought I wasn’t watching. The minute I met Daniel, I knew why.”

  Ian slowly lifted his hands. You knew this whole time?

  Ella slowly nodded. “So, it’s true?”

  Ian’s tears were instant, the hurt on his face etched in every line. “I’m so sorry, baby.”

  Ella sobbed in our kitchen, her words coming out in an angry burst. “I hate her!”

  Ian signed slowly. “You told her you know?”

  “No, she was too busy kissing his dick until he broke up with her.”

  “Language!”

  “It doesn’t matter, I don’t care about her or him. And now I’m losing you because you will have this new family without me. I know you got what you want now. A baby of your own.”

  “That’s not why Koti got pregnant, not for that reason.”

  “You’re too old.”

  “Now who’s the asshole? And I’m not too old, I’m still in my thirties until tomorrow.”

  “Then why?”

  “Because I love her, and I’m meant to be a dad.”

  “You got your wish.” Her heart was breaking, and I could feel the pain radiating off him. Ella shook with emotion as her father cut the air with his hand furiously until she raised her eyes to his.

  “You. Are. Mine,” he whispered fiercely, as he signed slow and with the same emphasis.

  “But I’m not. I’m not your daughter, I’m his.”

  I coughed back a sob standing on the sidelines, helpless and wanting to comfort them both.

  “You are mine and you know it. Neither of us can help what your mother did, but we can move past it because of the truth, nothing will ever come between us. I love you as much now as I did the minute I found out you were coming. It was the happiest moment of my life.”

  Ella broke before us, watching his hands as Ian fought with emotion, on the verge of losing his own battle. He cut the air, again and again, stomping his foot so she could feel the vibration as Ella’s shoulders fell forward in defeat. He moved swiftly toward her but remained inches away so she had no choice but to watch his plea. She lifted shimmering eyes to meet his before she followed his hands.

  “I’m so proud of you. You are mine. Your sarcasm, that’s mine, your need to fix things, that’s me, your independence, me, your mean right hook, your love for superhero movies, that all comes from me. All of those things and much more. You are a reflection of me. And you will never be replaced.”

  “Daddy.” She crumbled, and he stood where he was, his eyes filling as his voice broke. “But I deserve to be happy too. You are the one who pointed that out to me. And Koti makes me happy and this baby is a blessing and you will finally have the brother or sister you’ve been asking for since you were five.”

  Ella cried harder as Ian stood strong, adamant on making his point as he fought his need to physically comfort her. “Look at me, little woman. I’m your father, your Dad, forever. Don’t be afraid of this change, of this baby, or of losing an ounce of my love. Don’t be afraid of anything, because you are mine.”

  He pressed both hands to his chest and closed his eyes moving his body back and forth. I muffled back a sob. “You are mine, since the day your mother put you in my arms and we got linked.” He clasped his fingers together and pushed them toward her. “We are forever, Ella, nothing or no one can or will ever change that. Tell me you understand. Tell me you know that.”

  She nodded before she rushed into his open arms and broke inside them with relief. Ella’s cries had Ian faltering as I coughed out my own tears. After a few minutes of their embrace, Ella lifted her soaked face from his shoulder and stretched a hand out to me. “I’m sorry, Koti. I didn’t mean to ruin it for you.”

  Don’t you dare be sorry. You didn’t ruin anything. I love you and you are mine too.

  She nodded as she moved from her father’s embrace and nestled into my arms. After a few minutes, she looked up at me with stained cheeks and a sheepish smile. “I hope it’s a girl.”

  “I don’t,” Ian coughed out with a sigh as I shook with laughter. Ella frowned sensing her father’s smartassed comment and glanced behind at him before she looked to me for an answer.

  “What?”

  “Your dad is an asshole.”

  “That’s not news.”

  * * *

  My dreams and I spent the rest of the day playing in the waves on the shore in the backyard of our new home and later that night, two childhood friends held hands beneath the stars.

  “Well that went wonderfully,” Ian said with a chuckle. “Fuck, I think I had a small stroke.”

  “I think it went the way it was supposed to.”

  “I never wanted her to know.”

  “Ian, she’s lived with it for a while. She just needed to hear from you what she already knew, that it doesn’t matter.”

  “You think so?”

  “I know so. Also, you’re kind of incredible. Who knew the insane man with the shitty accent and bubble butt, would turn out to be Mr. Wonderful? Definitely not me.”

  He kissed the back of our clasped hands.

  “I think I first loved you when I was fourteen. Not the way I do now, but I’m pretty sure I loved you even then.”

  “I loved you because you gave me sweets.”

  “I know,” he chuckled.

  I stopped and turned to stare at my husband whose laughter lines had deepened and only made him more appealing. I reveled in the sexy grays that framed his temple. I looked forward to every year I noticed those subtle differences because it meant we would spend those years together. “Ian, how lucky are we to have met at all?”

  “Coming from different worlds, we had so many chances to miss each other.”

  I nodded. “Does this make you a believer?”

  “It makes me a believer of us.”

  “Forever a realist.”

  “Not so much anymore.”

  “Why is that?”

  He cupped my face and brushed his lips against mine. “Because I married my miracle.”

  * * *

  I laid in bed gazing at the twinkling galaxy outside of our skylight window thinking of the narrow roads that brought us back together. Sometimes what’s meant to be isn’t written in the stars, instead, it’s a journey on the path less traveled without a map of guidance, without certainty. Though Ian didn’t fully admit it, I was sure he had to believe that every battle we fought in our separate lives—good or bad—led us to that beach, to a glimpse of the life we could share together, and that was enough for us. That brief blip in time was all we needed to decide on the life we wanted. In that moment, I was grudgingly thankful for a body that wouldn’t cooperate and a mind that ran in circles, and I knew without a doubt my husband was grateful for the trials that led him to me because, without them, our stars wouldn’t have finally aligned. Our lives would’ve turned out differently, and for me, that would have been the real tragedy. In finding each other, we also discovered the why of our journey.

  Ian tenderly kissed my stomach while I whispered a prayer of thanks to the stars above with renewed faith.

  Not all love stories come with happy endings, but some do.

  THE END

  Listen to Someone Else’s Ocean playlist on Spotify

  Acknowledgments

  First and forever, I want to thank my readers. Four years after I published my first book, I’m still able to do something I love and it’s because of you. Thank you from the bottom to the top of my heart.

  A huge thank you to my Beta readers: Donna Cooksley Sanderson, Stacy Hahn, Sharon Dunn, Maiwenn Blogs, Patty Tennyson, Malene Dich, Christy Baldwin, Kathy Sheffler, Kelli Collopy, Sophie Broughton, Anne Christine, and Bex Kettner. Your infectious excitement makes it so easy to hand over a piece of my heart. Trusting you ladies is one of the best things I could ever do. You are so greatly appreciated and loved.

  Thank you to my PA, Bex Kettner, for effortlessly doing the job you do and for being my rock. Y
ou are an amazing help to me and a top-notch friend. I love you.

  Thank you, Autumn Gantz, for organizing the chaos and being the kick-ass friend you are. You are one of a kind and I’m so lucky to have found you.

  Donna Cooksley Sanderson, wow, just wow. You are one of the brightest lights I’ve ever met. I consider your friendship a gift and one of the best I’ve ever been blessed with. Our talks are the best parts of my day. You are one of the best friends I’ve ever had, and I promise to always set my coffee down for you. XO

  Thank you to my proof team-Donna Cooksley Sanderson, Joy Sadowski, Bethany Castaneda, Marissa D’Onofrio, Grey Ditto, for swooping in and saving the day.

  Christine Estevez, my editor extraordinaire, thank you so much for the endless faith you have in me. It means so much. I’m so excited about our new adventure and friendship.

  Thank you to my amazing family; Bob & Alta Scott, Angie, Kristan, Tommy, and Stephen. Watching everyone grow is such a gift. I love you all and our crazy dynamic. Not a day goes by where I’m not thankful to be a part of such a fantastic family. We are so lucky. I’m so lucky. I love you guys.

  A huge thank you to my BFF, Erica Fischer, my inspiration for Jasmine and her and Koti’s friendship. I’ll never be able to express how much I love and admire you, or how knowing you has changed me and at times saved me. You and me until the wheels fall off, buddy, and even after. Thank you for holding my hand through the last fourteen years.