by Cole, Fiona
20 Carina
Day Two:
Ian: What are my girls doing tonight?
Carina: Having tummy time.
Ian: I love tummy time. I may have some tummy time myself later.
Carina: Well, it isn’t our daughter’s favorite. She may learn to roll over just to avoid it.
Ian: She better not roll over until I can see it.
Ian: FaceTime me. I need to tell her not to roll until Daddy is home.
Day Five:
Ian: Did you know all the museums are free here? We should bring Audrey when she’s older.
Carina: I’ll put it on her calendar.
Ian: Good. Now send me a picture so I can see my girls.
Day Seven:
Ian: What are my girls doing tonight?
Carina: Bath time.
Ian: Both of you? ;)
Ian: Quick, send me a picture.
Carina: No, you perv. Just Audrey.
Ian: Still send a picture.
Ian: She’s getting so chubby. I love it.
Carina: She’s getting heavy to hold.
Ian: Don’t worry, I’ll be home soon with my big, man muscles.
Ian: Quick question…
Carina: Shoot.
Ian: A local paper is wanting to do an interview and offering a discounted ad space. I was wondering if it was worth it to invest the time and money since their name wasn’t recognizable at first mention.
Carina: Send me the name, and I’ll look into it and get back to you.
Ian: Thank you.
Ian: Damn, I’m lucky I have the smartest girl on speed dial.
Day Nine:
Ian: Send me a pic.
Ian: Of BOTH my girls.
Ian: God, I miss you guys.
Carina: We miss you too.
Ian: We, eh?
Carina: Shut up, Ian.
Ian: You love it.
Carina: I’m rolling my eyes.
Ian: I’m imagining it now. Sooo sexy.
Carina: When do you get back?
Ian: Three more days.
This trip was making me question my sanity because I had to be insane with how much my body flushed with happiness when I saw Ian’s messages pop up on my phone each day. I had to be insane with how much I sat around waiting to hear from him and wondering what we’d talk about.
I had to be insane because three days felt like an eternity, and I wanted him home now. These past nine days have dragged on, making me realize how much I missed him. Me missing Ian. I never thought that was an emotion I’d feel when it came to him. Maybe it was because I was just lonely. I’d been out of work for almost six weeks now, only coming on for a few consulting jobs that didn’t require much of my time or to leave Audrey.
But even that sounded like a false reason since I’d spent more time at my aunts’ houses than I had all month. I didn’t lack adult interaction.
I thought back to how hard I laughed dancing around the kitchen with Ian and the fluttering in my belly kicked up. When was the last time I’d laughed so hard? When was the last time I’d had that light floaty feeling of happiness?
The day I had Audrey stood at the forefront of my mind, but Ian was there too, holding my hand and sharing the moment with me.
Somehow over these past two months, despite how hard I tried to fight him off, he’d ingratiated himself in my life, and this pang of missing him reinforces how close to the edge of falling I’d come.
That thought brought a new wave of adrenaline that felt a lot like fear. What if I was setting myself up for failure again? What if I was falling into what was easy and all of it meant nothing?
My phone vibrating pulled me out of my head, and when I saw Ian’s name on the screen, I rushed to pick up.
“She’s napping,” I greeted, already smiling.
“Well, it’s a good thing I called to talk to you.”
His deep voice rumbled across the line and shot straight to my core. “Did you need to ask me something?”
“Can’t a man just call his baby-mama and say hello?”
“I cringe every time you call me that.”
“It’s true though.”
“All right, sperm donor,” I deadpanned.
“At your service, whenever you need me.”
I couldn’t hold back my laugh no matter how much I tried to keep it in.
“What are you up to?”
“Watching a movie?”
“Porn? Please say porn?”
Another laugh. “No, but I did find your stash. Quite a collection there.”
If I expected him to be embarrassed, I would have been disappointed. “Man, you dug in the back-back of my movie collection. That stuff is from my teen years. Now, I just use the internet.”
“I shudder at your search history.”
“Oh, you know exactly what I like.”
His voice was soft and seductive, pulling me into memories of our date. Heat infused my cheeks, and I struggled to keep my breathing even. This conversation was taking a turn, and the fact that the thought of falling into phone sex with Ian didn’t completely turn me off, had me forcing the topic change.
“I found Monty Python and the Holy Grail.”
“Good choice. I haven’t seen it in forever. Maybe we can watch it when I get home.”
Home. Each time he called the place we lived together home, I melted and took a few more steps toward that cliff.
“Yeah,” I answered breathlessly. “What are you doing up so late?”
“Dinner ran long.”
“Who’d you meet with?”
“The main foreman and his daughter. Apparently, she’s in town for a photoshoot, and he asked if she could come. I figured why not.”
Because who would turn down dinner with a model? That was what I wanted to say; instead, I went with a much more eloquent answer. “Oh.”
“Yeah, it went well.”
“Good.”
“I can’t wait to get back home to my girls.”
And just like that, the sinking feeling of imagining him with some model vanished.
“We can’t wait to see you too.”
“I miss you.”
And unlike the time when I dropped him off at the airport, I didn’t hesitate to say it back. “I miss you too.”
“I’ll call you tomorrow. Maybe we can FaceTime?”
“Yeah, Audrey will like that.”
I didn’t have to say it for both of us to hear that I would like it too.
And that thought brought me a little bit closer to the edge again, both terrifying and exhilarating me.
* * *
Ian
Day Ten:
Ian: Chinese or Mexican?
Carina: What?
Ian: Which do you want for dinner?
Carina: What????
Ian: …
Ian: You took too long. I chose Mexican.
I slid my key into the lock and opened the door just as my phone vibrated in my pocket. Carina’s head jerked up from where she stood in the middle of the room, a confused look scrunching her face. When she took me in standing there, her look changed to something else.
Something I had never seen before. At least, not unless it came with an eye roll.
She looked…happy.
No, not happy. But joyful.
I barely had time to drop my bags before she was across the room and in my arms. My hands went to her slim waist, and I was drowned in the masses of her long hair as she buried her head in my neck.
I would have been less surprised if Audrey came running across the room into my arms.
“You’re home early.”
Home. I’d never get tired of hearing her say that. The fact that I could feel her breath on my skin as she said it, lit me on fire.
“I missed my girls.”
I’d just begun to fully embrace her when she let go and stepped back, clearing her throat and looking down at the floor before peeking up through her lashes. “Sorry. That was a bit much.”
“Nah. I think it was just enough.”
She stared for a bit longer before dropping her eyes again. The moment grew tense, and I didn’t want to ruin the warm welcome with her overthinking it, so I didn’t push and picked Audrey up from her rocker.
“Were you that bad that Mommy actually missed me?”
I held her close and breathed in her sweet baby scent I’d grown addicted to. Kissing her fat cheek, I relished the feeling of being whole with her in my arms.
“Say, no. You’d never be that bad,” I baby-talked and smiled. “You’re an angel.”
Her big blue eyes blinked up at me before the most magical thing happened. Her little cheek twitched until she was giving me a gummy smile.
“Holy shit! She smiled,” I said to Carina but didn’t take my attention off Audrey. “Did you smile for me? Yes, you did. Yes, you did.”
“I should record this and send it to Erik.”
“Don’t you dare. He’d post it on the company website.”
Carina came over to stroke Audrey’s cheek, and I soaked in her citrus and lavender scent as well. I had to fight from turning my head and burying it in her neck to breathe more of her in.
It’d been the longest week of my life being away from my girls. Even with all the messaging and FaceTime. Each time I talked to Carina, I expected her to call me out on including her with Audrey when I called them “my girls,” but she never did. Not that it would have mattered. They both were, whether Carina would admit it or not.
“I was just about to put her down,” Carina said.
“I’ll do it. You grab the plates, and we can eat once she’s asleep.”
It was maybe ten minutes of rocking and bouncing before Audrey’s eyes slid closed despite how hard she fought to keep them open. Part of me wanted to keep her in my arms, but I was looking forward to dinner with Carina. So, I sat her in her sleeper and headed to the dining room where Carina had everything set up.
“Let me guess you wanted Chinese?”
She glowered but smiled a radiant smile. “Actually, Mexican sounded good.”
I stumbled back and put my hand to my chest. “Did hell just freeze over? Is this a dream?”
She laughed and slapped my shoulder. “Sit down and eat before I change my mind.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I’d just taken my first bite when she asked, “How are you here?”
“Well, Miss Russo, there’s this flying metal box they call an airplane. It’s magical and amazing.”
She laughed and rolled her eyes. I knew I was a goner for this woman when I even missed watching her daily eye rolls.
“Shut up.”
“I rushed some meetings and took the soonest flight home. It was too long of a trip anyway.”
She pushed some rice around her plate, and her hair fell, hiding her face. “Well, I’m glad you’re here.”
Reaching across the small space, I brushed her hair behind her ear and waited until she met my eyes. “Me too.”
Christ, I loved that blush on her cheeks. It always made me wonder how far down it went. One of these days I’d find out.
“Maybe next time you and Audrey can come with me.”
“Yeah, that would be really nice.” She cleared her throat and changed the subject. “So, tell me about work.”
We spent the rest of the meal talking shop, but I regaled her with stories of the interesting things I saw and people I met. I could have sat there all night watching her laugh and hearing her opinion on the marketing, but soon she was yawning.
“We should probably head to bed. Audrey will be up soon.”
“Yeah, let me help you clean up.”
She took the plates in, and I gathered the trash. She was just putting the last plate in the dishwasher when I walked in. Her round bottom looked extra ripe under her black leggings. Her waist had slimmed like Audrey had never been there at all. She was beautiful and I just…I just had to have a taste.
Setting the bags aside, I walked up behind her, not being subtle about what I was going after. I brushed her hair aside and lowered my nose to her neck, taking in the smell of her like I’d wanted to earlier. She tensed but didn’t pull away, and I took the opportunity to kiss up her neck to her ear.
“God, I missed you.”
“Ian…” she breathed my name like a plea. I didn’t know if it was a plea to stop or a plea to go further, but I knew which one I was going to give her.
I gripped her full hips under my palms and pulled her back against my growing erection. “Just go with it, Carina.”
I continued kissing her neck, moving from small kisses to full-on, making love to it with my tongue. All the while, my hand crept across her abdomen—that did still bear the signs of carrying our child—and descending into her pants.
She gasped and jerked back when my finger slipped through the lips of her pussy and fingered her clit. My cock was impossibly hard and desperate for her. It’d been entirely too long. Thrusting against the curves of her ass, I dipped into her opening and pulled wetness back up to her bud, rubbing harder.
“I want to be inside you, Carina.”
Her throat moved under my mouth with a swallow, and she shook her head. “It’s too soon.”
I was about to argue that it’d been almost a year when she clarified.
“I can’t have sex until six weeks.”
“Fine,” I said before nipping her neck. “Then I’ll settle for hearing you come.”
I played with her clit, using my other hand to move up to her breasts, pulling the cup of her bra aside and thumbing her pebbled tip. She moaned and rocked into my hand. Her fists clenched tight on the counter, her head fallen back on my shoulder.
“Does that feel good, baby?”
“Yes. More.”
I pinched the bundle of nerves between my fingers and rolled it back and forth.
“Ian,” she almost screamed. Almost.
“Come on. You can do better than that.”
“Make me,” she issued the challenge over her shoulder.
“My pleasure.”
I dipped into her wet pussy again and furiously rubbed across her clit, not stopping until her legs shook, and she squeezed my palm between her clenching thighs. Not until I felt her opening throbbing against my fingers. Not until she screamed my name.
Slowing my movements, I peppered kisses down her shoulder and up her neck until she finally controlled her breathing. I was slowly removing my hand from her pants when she jerked away and immediately fell to her knees in front of me.
“Uh, C—Carina.” I stuttered, shocked at her position.
“Shut up, Ian.”
Her hands efficiently unbuckled my pants and tugged them down my hips until my cock sprang free.
“Fuck, I forgot how big you are.”
She was so close to the head of my cock, I could feel the words against my skin, and I shuddered. My legs almost gave out when her tongue slicked across the tip, collecting the drop of precum.
“Show me how much you like it.”
She smirked and held my gaze as she sank down my length and slid back up, achingly slow.
I buried my hand in her hair and gave her my own smirk in return. “Come on, Carina, you can do better than that.”
She repaid my comment by dragging her teeth along my cock and nipping at the end gently. But then she did more than better. She did fan-fucking-tastic. She had my eyes rolling to the back of my head, and my legs damn near giving out.
She used one hand to play with my balls and the other to stroke what her mouth couldn’t cover, which wasn’t much because she was giving it her all to get every inch of me in her mouth. One of these days I’d teach her how to take me into her throat. The thought of her laying on the bed and my cock buried so deep it bulged against her throat, mixed with the sight of her full lips wrapped around my dick was too much.
“I’m gonna come. Are you going to swallow? You going to let me spill my cum in that pretty mouth?”
Without stopping, she cocked a brow, and I growled, gripping her hair tight and fucking her mouth with quick short thrusts until everything zeroed in on the pleasure consuming me. I didn’t want to close my eyes but couldn’t help it. The orgasm was too strong. It’d been way too long since I’d come any other way than my own hand.
She sucked and swallowed, but not fast enough to not have some leak out the corner of her mouth.
“Fuck, that is sexy,” I barely breathed, taking my thumb and wiping away what escaped.
She popped off my cock and took my thumb in her mouth.
“Yes,” I moaned.
Her tongue swirled around my finger, and I couldn’t take it. I jerked her up and pinned her to the counter, claiming her mouth with mine. Loving the taste of my cum on her tongue.
But as the kiss slowed, I could feel the doubt creeping in. Each muscle slowly stiffened under my hands, and I needed to do damage control. Carina was giving in to her desire a little more each time the tension between us snapped, and I found backing off before she could build a giant wall against me worked better than trying to break it down.
“Don’t overthink it, Carina,” I whispered against her trembling lips. “Everything is still fine.”
“But, Ian. I—”
I pressed my fingers to her lips. “Don’t. Over. Think. It.” When she nodded, I pulled my hand back and fastened my pants. “Now, let’s go to bed and let me hold you.”
“Ian—”
“Ah, ah, ah.” I halted her argument. “Just so I can help you through the night with Audrey. You’ve been on solo duty all week.”
After only a moment’s hesitation, she gave in.
We got ready, and she tried to sleep on the edge of the bed, but I pulled her close so I could spoon her, keeping my hands in safe territory.
“I’ll be right here if Audrey wakes up. Get some sleep.”
It didn’t take long for her breathing to even out and for the first time since she’d been born, Audrey slept through the night, letting Mommy and Daddy stay pressed together until dawn.