Silent Pledge

by Hannah Alexander

  It also didn’t give her back her fertility. Logically she knew another child would be a bad idea at this time in her life, but she didn’t appreciate the choice being taken from her. She’d argued with God about what was happening several times in the past few months, but He wasn’t budging.

  As she brooded and felt the drug drift into her system and begin the relaxing effects, she saw car lights appear outside and slowly move along the street in front of the house. The pretty reflection of light danced against the panes of the window, against the ice as it broke the light into colors. The reflection looked like a kaleidoscope. The forward motion of the lights stopped for a moment, then moved on, then stopped again. And it hovered out in the darkness.

  Mercy frowned and shook her head. Was she suddenly having hallucinations? Had someone parked on the street in front of their house and forgotten to turn off his headlights? She recalled the time she’d taken her first sleeping pill—Tedi had suddenly sprouted another set of eyes from her forehead. For a full week, Mercy had skipped the medication, but the insomnia continued. In the end she had decided that sleep deprivation was more dangerous for her—and for her daughter and her patients—than a simple nighttime dose to help her through menopause.

  “Mustard?”

  Mercy blinked and turned from the window. “What?”

  Tedi held a bottle up. The letters on the label were already indecipherable to Mercy. “Do you want hot mustard on your wrap, Mom? I’m making myself one, too.”

  “Yes, mustard. And while you’re at it, peanut butter and banana.”

  Tedi giggled. “Mom, you’re already whacked.”

  “I know.” She frowned. Now, what was she thinking about just a moment ago? That was another problem with these sleeping pills—short-term memory loss just before sleep.

  Oh, well, a little forgetfulness couldn’t be as important as food right now. She turned and followed Tedi into the kitchen.

  Lukas knew he shouldn’t be angry with Tex for setting him up, but he wondered if this night would ever end. He and Nancy had joined Tex and Hershel in the living room, and to his everlasting humiliation, Nancy had just finished spouting the details of his dilemma with Mercy. He had a big mouth. Nancy had a bigger one. And he’d thought Tex was bad.

  What really bothered him was that Nancy had a point—not that he wanted that point spread all over Herald. He probably should have talked to Mercy about Theodore, but it was so awkward. They’d had so little time together. What was he supposed to do, blurt out in front of everyone at the dinner table, “I’m sorry, Mercy, but I can’t see you because of some theological complications resulting from your marriage to Theo”? How did one discuss such a personal issue when a talkative eleven-year-old was spilling her guts about school projects and dates with her dad and the divorce her best friend’s parents were going through?

  “Dr. Bower, I can’t believe you never said anything to her about it!” Tex exclaimed. “What are you afraid of?”

  Hershel placed an arm around her shoulder. “Now, come on, give the guy a break. He’s never even been married, and you expect him to go proposing to a woman with a child when the ex-husband is trying to get her back?”

  Lukas cleared his throat. “That isn’t exactly what I’m concerned about.”

  “But what irritates me is that he refuses to tell her how much he loves her,” Nancy said. “Doesn’t she have a right to know?”

  “Hold it.” Lukas wondered if he had the authority to fire Tex. In Knolls, where he was interim director, he might get away with it. Here they were too hard up for help—even loudmouthed, pushy help that set you up with sharp-tongued divorcees. “I’m not sure when my private life became open to public scrutiny, but I think we’re blowing this all out of proportion.”

  “And Lukas has a right to his feelings,” Hershel added. “You don’t just take a man’s emotions out and examine them under a microscope like you women do.” He scooted a little closer to Tex.

  Tex looked at him quizzically.

  “Excuse me.” Nancy’s voice rose again.

  Lukas wondered if that biker gal Birdbrain might make a more appealing date.

  “I didn’t let you drag me all the way down here for an unwanted date so you could insult me.”

  “Hey, I resent that,” Tex shot back at Nancy. She scooted sideways, forcing Hershel to remove his arm from her shoulder. “I went to a lot of trouble to set you up with him. He’s a good guy. He goes to church and everything.”

  Nancy ignored her. “You know what you are?” She pointed her finger at Lukas. “You’re afraid of commitment. You don’t think you can handle raising another man’s child.”

  Lukas glared at her and wondered what the repercussion would be if he threw all three of his guests out the door.

  “I don’t blame him,” Tex said. “I wouldn’t be a good stepparent, either.”

  “At least he’s smart enough to realize the problem and back off,” Hershel said. “Most people jump into the role without giving the kids a thought, and they expect everything to be perfect, and it never works out that way. I think he’s showing common sense.”

  Lukas gazed at each earnest face in turn. Was this for real? They were yanking out and examining his private thoughts like a game of Scrabble.

  “Fine, but the least he can do is tell this poor woman how he feels.” Nancy crossed her arms and sat back. “If he doesn’t, he’s treating her like trash to be thrown away. Use and discard. I know. I’ve been treated like that.”

  “But it isn’t like that.”

  The telephone rang from its perch on the wall beside the kitchen entrance. To Lukas the phone sounded like a time-out bell at a wrestling match. He leaped to his feet and rushed over to answer, automatically hoping to hear Mercy’s voice at the other end of the line—not that he wanted three eavesdroppers telling him how to conduct his conversation.

  “Hello.”

  “Dr. Bower? This is Carmen in the emergency room. I just thought you might want to know that they found Jerod Moore.”

  “The baby?” He turned and gestured to the others. “They found him! Marla Moore’s baby!”

  Tex leaped from the sofa. “All right!”

  Hershel laughed and high-fived Tex.

  “How is he?” Nancy asked. “Is he okay?”

  Lukas relayed the question to Carmen, and to his dismay the three others crowded around him and the telephone to hear the reply.

  “They just checked him out here a few minutes ago, and he’s perfectly healthy. Two ladies from the Division of Family Services came to get him, and they’re taking him to Jefferson City. There’s a lady who runs a clinic called Alternative.”

  “Alternative!” Hershel exclaimed. “Serena Tanner runs that clinic to provide an alternative to abortion. She was the one I called when Marla first started seeing me.”

  “Shh!” Tex said. “There’s more.”

  “One of the social workers told me that they’re hoping this Tanner lady and her husband will be able to adopt Jerod. They can’t find any living relatives. So far this sounds like a happy ending, doesn’t it?”

  “Yes, but where did they find him?” Lukas asked. “What happened?”

  “That’s the weirdest thing, Dr. Bower. You know that biker gang that’s staying down there in those shacks right now? Well, somebody knocked on Catcher’s door tonight, and when he stepped out he found Jerod all bundled up, lying beside a Harley. He brought the baby in, and the police tried to give him a hard time. We had quite a stir here for a few minutes, but they let him go. It’s a pretty sure bet Catcher wasn’t in any shape to steal a baby early last Sunday morning. Uh-oh, I’ve got to go. They’re bringing in another patient.” She hung up abruptly.

  Lukas sighed in relief.

  Hershel laid a hand on Tex’s shoulder once again.

  Nancy broke the silence. “So, Lukas, are you going to be a real man and tell this woman in Knolls that you love her?”

  Lukas made an obvious show of checking h
is watch. “Wow, I can’t believe it’s so late. Time sure does fly when you’re having…uh…fun. I’ll go get your coat, Tex. Glad you guys could come for dinner, but it’s getting late and I have to work tomorrow.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  The chirp of Mercy’s cordless telephone awakened her Thursday morning. She managed to catch a glance at the glowing digits on her bedside clock as she fumbled for the receiver, punched the wrong button three times and finally made a connection. It was seven o’clock.

  “Hello.” She pushed the hair from her eyes as she waited for a reply.

  No one answered.

  “Yes, hello?” she tried again as she folded the covers back and swung her legs to the side of the bed. She would have to get up anyway in a few minutes. Tedi had school today, and patients were scheduled at the clinic, in spite of the fact that this was supposed to be her day off.

  Still no one answered, but she heard voices in the background, like a radio or television. And she heard someone breathing, and then a click and a dial tone.

  She disconnected and shoved the telephone aside irritably. How rude.

  Clarence opened his eyes for the fourth time Thursday morning. Daylight at last. The first time he’d awakened had been two o’clock, and then four, and then five-fifteen, and each time at least twenty minutes had dragged by before he could get back to sleep. For him, bedtime was like the beginning of a work shift. Getting enough sleep was a chore. With his bulk it was hard to get comfortable, and after a while most positions put an arm or a leg to sleep. Lots of times he snored so loudly he startled himself awake, wondering if a semitruck without a muffler was bursting through the front door of the apartment. He was glad Darlene slept in a bedroom in the main house.

  Darlene was spending more time out lately. Publishers still sent her indexing projects, but she’d cut her workload to a more manageable level. To everyone’s great relief, her asthma was under control.

  Clarence sat up and looked across the room at a daily inspirational calendar Ivy had given him for Christmas. Yesterday’s Scripture portion for the day was “He hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted…”

  He knew from asking Ivy that the verse meant Jesus Christ was the Healer, but sometimes, when he saw people like Kendra and Buck hurting, he wondered if a little encouragement from a friend might tide them over while they were waiting on Jesus. He thought again about Saturday night and about Kendra’s broken heart. Could she be healed? And Buck? Was there a school that taught you how to help people like that?

  The thought of a guy his age and weight going back to school seemed crazy. Where would he get the money? He needed to start making a living for himself now, not four or six years from now.

  But still…there was Saturday night resting in his memory. For a little while he’d been able to help give two people hope. Did a guy have to have a college degree to do that?

  With a little less effort than it would have taken three months ago, he stood up and walked over to the dresser. He tore off yesterday’s date and verse from the calendar to see what today would bring. The new verse was pretty simple, another one he could memorize easily, although he would never get the address right—he didn’t even know what “Thessalonians” meant. The verse said, “Pray without ceasing.”

  Prayer. When he’d prayed out loud for Buck and Kendra, things had started to change. But to never stop praying? What did that mean?

  Part of the message grew clear to him as he thought about it: he was supposed to keep praying for Buck and Kendra and not just stop at that one prayer he said the other night. He could also pray for Odira and Crystal. He didn’t know exactly how prayer worked, because it was still a mystery nobody seemed able to explain. But the fact of the matter was that his prayer had helped Buck and Kendra…at least for a while.

  And so he sat down on the side of his bed and bowed his head and closed his eyes the way Ivy did. He’d prayed before. He could do it again.

  Mercy backed out of the garage and pushed the remote-control button on her key chain to close the garage door. As always on Thursday morning, she wondered how much of her day off she would spend working. She was supposed to meet Buck and Kendra at the clinic this morning at ten, and after that she would go to the hospital and check on Delphi Bell and probably release her if she looked okay. Odira and Crystal were due for release, too, and Odira was begging to go home. And then there were the patients who hadn’t been able to make it in yesterday because of the ice storm.

  “See those cigarette butts!” Tedi’s outraged voice filled the car, and she pecked at the car window with her fingernails as Mercy backed out of the driveway. “They weren’t there yesterday.”

  “Tedi, what on earth are you…?” Mercy looked in the direction her daughter pointed and saw tan filter tips of three smoked cigarettes lying close together on top of the ice, just inside a stand of head-tall evergreen bushes that grew along the curb by the street. “Yes, I see them. Have you suddenly joined some kind of neighborhood trash patrol?”

  Tedi sighed and rolled her eyes at Mercy. “Mom, those are on our property. And there are three of them.” She pressed closer to the window. “And they look like the same kind, which probably means that the person who smokes that brand of cigarettes was trespassing on our property long enough to smoke three of them.”

  “Or those three butts blew from down the street with the hard wind we had and got caught behind those bushes. Are you reading another Jennie McGrady mystery?”

  Tedi didn’t reply.

  Mercy cast her daughter a worried look and reached across to touch her shoulder. “Honey, have you been having your nightmares again lately?” Tedi had a vivid imagination, and events affected her deeply. The situation with her father was better, but she might still be preoccupied with the changing relationship with him.

  “Maybe some.” Tedi shrugged. “It’s probably nothing, Mom. Don’t worry about it.”

  “Okay, but remember you can always tell me if you’re worried about something.” Mercy pulled out onto the street. She thought of Delphi. “How do you feel about having a houseguest for a while?”

  Tedi turned to her excitedly. “A guest? Is Abby going to spend the night tonight? She needs to get away from home. Her mom—”

  “No, honey, not Abby. We’ll have her over soon, but I’m releasing a patient from the hospital today, and she needs a place to stay until Arthur and Alma Collins return to Crosslines.”

  Tedi’s eagerness turned to curiosity. “Is she a homeless person? Here in Knolls?”

  “She’s homeless right now, but she won’t be as soon as we take her in, will she?”

  “Who is she? Do we know her? What happened to her?”

  Mercy slowed the car at the end of the street, checked the rearview mirror to make sure no one was driving up behind her, then turned to Tedi and laid a hand on her arm. “Sweetheart, this is very serious. I don’t want you to tell anyone that we’re even going to have company, do you understand? She could be in danger from her husband, and we don’t want word getting out that we know where she is.” She held Tedi’s dark, suddenly sober gaze. “Do you understand?”

  “Sure, Mom. I tried to hide from Dad, too, remember? I know what it’s like to be scared and not be able to go home.”

  Involuntarily Mercy closed her eyes against the sudden pain of those memories. But then a horn honked behind them, and she saw in the mirror that she was holding up traffic. She pulled out into the road to join the line of cars carrying children to school after a day off.

  “Did you know that Abby’s dad isn’t even trying to get custody of her and April and Andy?” Tedi informed her. “She told me that at school Tuesday, and she was crying. Her mom’s dumping all the housework on her, and Abby even has to babysit her brother and sister while her mom goes out sometimes at night to classes so she can get a better job.”

  Mercy shook her head sadly. Jason and Lindy Cuendet had separated last fall, and at least half the citizens of Knolls seemed to be making it their
business to keep each spouse informed about the other. Jason could smile at the wrong person, and Lindy would hear about it by the end of the day. If Lindy purchased too much on her charge card or took the kids out to dinner, Jason was calling to complain by the next morning. Tedi had a front-row seat for the show and was sometimes an active, though unwilling, participant, since she and Abby were best friends.

  “Did you know Grandma volunteered to help out at Crosslines when Arthur and Alma get it set up?” Tedi’s informative chatter on the way to school on mornings like this was sometimes the only local news Mercy heard all day. “She’s going to do their accounting. And guess who she’s talked into helping out at the clinic on Saturdays?”

  Mercy frowned. “Clinic? What clinic?”

  “Arthur and Alma are starting a free clinic on Saturdays for people who can’t afford a doctor. They’ve already lined up all their volunteers, and they start next month.”

  “Doctors, too?” Mercy turned onto the school drive and waited her turn to let Tedi out.

  “Yeah. Grandma sweet-talked Dr. Heagerty out of retirement enough to help out half a day on Saturdays. Grandma’s going to work with him.” Tedi giggled. “Grandma had to kiss him to get him to help out.”

  Mercy gasped. “What!”

  Tedi glanced around at the car behind them. “Mom, you’re going to cause a traffic jam. You know Grandma and Dr. Hugh are seeing each other. And it’s not like she hasn’t kissed him before. You’re just never around whenever they’re together.”

  Why did Mercy suddenly feel as if life was passing her by? “Who else is working at this clinic?”

  “Jarvis said he’d help out, but he and Dr. Hugh don’t like each other, so Grandma said they would have to split shifts. Either Dr. Hugh could work one Saturday and Jarvis the next Saturday, or one could do mornings and one could do afternoons. They decided to split days. That way it wouldn’t wear either of them out.”

  “Nobody ever called me to help out.”