“Is he gone?” her voice is shaky, not taking her eyes off of his body “I……I don’t know” He’s not moving, I can’t even tell if he’s breathing. I try to get her away from it, but she just sits there staring at him, rocking back and forth muttering something I can’t make out. I need to do something….
I need to find a phone or something, something to help us.
Seeing the house phone on the kitchen counter I almost sob with relief, diving for it to call help. Trying my hardest with shaky fingers, I try to dial, it takes me three attempts but I finally manage to dial the number. “I need help, I think…..I’ve killed someone”.
Hearing the door open a couple of minutes later, I feel Hayley tense up in my arms, I managed to get her to the sofa in the end, but she’s still not stopped shaking “Police!” is shouted by the door making Hayley whimper “Let me in, my mum and girlfriend are in there!” Reid! He’s here!
Two policemen come through guns pointed in front of them searching the area “Where is he?” they ask still not holstering their weapons “Kitchen” I say with a shaky voice, one of them says something into his radio as they round the corner.
My mind is all foggy, I feel like I’m not connected to my body. Abi! She said if I feel like I can’t get back I should think of my focal point, closing my eyes I focus on Reid.
I imagine us being together.
Him kissing my neck.
His beautiful smile.
“Hey sweetie” someone says bringing me away from my thoughts “Let’s get you out of here okay. I’ve got two very worried boys outside waiting for you girls” I try to focus on her face, she looks kind. Wrinkles line her forehead and under her eyes, I almost smile when she pushes her big frame glasses up her nose, she kind of adorable. Giving me a warm smile, she puts her arm around me to lead me from the house.
Not wanting to leave Hayley I try to coax her to stand with me, she snaps her face to me as soon as try to pull her up “NO! I need Asher. Where is he!? ASHER!” she shouts her eyes wild with panic, hearing his name he rushes for the door “You can’t go in there fella, it’s a crime scene” a burly cop says at the door putting his arm up to stop him, “Let him in Ian, she won’t come without him” the nice lady cop says. Letting him through he approaches Hayley on the sofa, her eyes are wild with panic, whole body shaking “Hey baby. It’s me” she squeezes her eyes shut as she shakes her head, “No No he’s here! He’s back!” she’s delirious, her mind is cracking.
Asher luckily seems to know exactly what to do, “Think of your mum Hayley…Focus on her” he seems to be able to get through to her somehow. Looking up at him, it only takes a second of seeing at his face before she jumps on him, wrapping her arms around his neck “Shhhh, I got you” he whispers as he carries her out, needing to get her awa from here. Leaning against the lady, I stumble my way towards the door, seeing all the blue flashing lights outside, I finally feel safe…..
We made it.
“Beck’s!” Reid shouts as he runs towards me. Wrapping my arms around him I fall apart on his shoulder “Oh god, I thought I’d lost you” I thought I’d lost you too. Putting his hands on my face he looks me in the eyes before kissing the life out of me “We need to get her checked over Mr. Doyle” an officer says as he coaxes us towards and ambulance. Reid holds me up as I stumble my way over, the adrenaline dissipating
The quicker I can get away from the house… the better.
Luckily I only have a slight bruise on my cheek from the kitchen floor, Hayley gets the all clear with just a busted lip and black eye…..it could have been so much worse, but we decided to fight back this time.
We chose to survive.
They take me to hospital just to make sure the baby is okay, I hadn’t experienced any bleeding or cramps, but they wanted to make sure. Having an ultrasound, I thank god when see the little peanut is still there “That’s one tough little baby” the examiner says wiping the jelly off my stomach.
My tough little baby. I could have lost him tonight.
I hadn’t known I was pregnant long, but the relief I feel at knowing he’s ok in there is huge.
I won’t let anyone hurt you
“Is he okay?” Reid asks, he hasn’t left my side the entire time. I’ve never seen him cry before but seeing him now with watery eyes looking at our baby, makes me love him even more. “Perfect, for the next few weeks I want you to just rest Becca, let your body recover” wheeling her chair over she hands me and Reid a pamphlet “This explains about any symptoms you may get, the ones in red you need to call us for straight away” Reid takes it from her and stuff it in his pocket, no doubt to over analyse later “So, No dancing?” I ask earning a look from Reid “Not for at least two weeks. Your midwife will advise you when you see her for your next appointment”
Great, more time off.
We say our thankyou’s and are finally discharged home. I just hope I can go in that house again. Reid insists on pushing me to the cab in a wheelchair, feeling exhausted I don’t have the energy to fight with him. It’s completely over kill, but my legs are feeling sluggish anyway. He also has a face of barely contained fury right now… no way I’m poking the bear.
Pulling up, I see a police car still in the driveway, I’m guessing they want my statement now. Will I go to prison if he’s dead? I feel a sense of dread at seeing the house, wringing my hands together I take deep breaths in an attempt to calm my racing heart “Hey. We go in together. We face it, together” Reid tells me grabbing my hand.
I can do this
Pulling on my big girl pants, I take a deep breath and open the car door.
He’s not there anymore
He can’t hurt me again
Taking my hand, he gives it a reassuring squeeze. I don’t know what I would have done without him today, so many times I felt like was going to fall apart…. But somehow… he keeps me together.
Walking in I see Asher on the sofa chatting to Detective Sullivan “Becca, are you okay? How’s the baby?” he asks as soon as he see’s us “We’re okay, got the all clear that little peanut is still happy in there. I’m on bed rest though” I’m going to go crazy cooped up in here for weeks “Too damn right you are” Reid mutters. Turning to the Detective, I decide to get this over with “Do you need my statement?” I may sound rude, but I’m so nervous that I’ll have to go to the police station that I can’t deal with formalities right now “No, there’s plenty of time for that. I just wanted to hang around to give you an update. Gary Spurgeon has been arrested for many charges, which I’ll give you a list of later. He’s being watched in hospital at the moment” What….. “He’s still alive?” How!, I mean I’m glad I won’t be going to prison for murder, but he was stabbed and shot! “Yes he’s alive…. unfortunately,” she says the last bit under her breath making Asher smile “He sustained a collapsed lunge from the knife wound, and the bullet went right through his gut. Life threatening, but survivable”.
When I aimed the gun, I just wanted to hit him anywhere, I wasn’t paying attention to where the bullet went “We assume he passed out from shock and blood loss. Your mother was detained not long ago actually. She was found in a bar arguing with another patron about stealing her drink, she was found with almost £5000 cash on her person.”
Why did she have so much cash?
“She is being charged with aiding a fugitive, grievous assault and drunk and disorderly” I need to tell her…. I need to finally stand up for myself “And 20 years of child abuse and assault” I tell her holding my head high, its time my mum paid for making my life hell. Smiling proudly at me she rights some notes down on her pad “Okay, When you are ready you can come and give both statements. All I will say as a police officer is they will be going away for a long time, you can be sure of that….as a mother, I want to tell you I am incredibly proud of you, for fighting back, fighting for yourself” walking over I give her a hug and to say thank you for everything, her words mean more to me now than ever. I’m done not fighting for myself
and I won’t let anyone walk all over me again.
The next couple of weeks fly by without much drama for once. It takes me a full week to walk in the kitchen without running back out to throw up, I’m calling it great progress. Reid continues to treat me as if I were made of glass, on one hand, I love how attentive he’s being. On the other…..he’s driving me insane. I physically had to push him out of the bathroom every time I wanted a use the bathroom or shower, like I was going to break down when I was cleaning my teeth….it has become a great skill resisting the urge to roll my eyes when he tells me to leave the bathroom door open.
Three days after the attack I go down to the station to give both my statements, it was horrible and exhausting, but Reid was there every step of the way. It turns out, Gary had given mum more money the night he came to the house, he paid her to be able to rape me…again. She confessed to everything once she sobered up in the cells,
How he paid her to lure me to the house the first time,
Then again to keep her quiet when he came for me again.
I’d put a spanner in their plan when I went to the house that day, but when she saw my car, they cooked up a new plan. Knowing I was in there, they started making noise in an effort to convince me they were distracted. Their plan working, I snuck downstairs trying to escape when they caught me. She locked the front door knowing I would have to go through the kitchen to use the back way, I played right into their trap. She’d written me a letter while in her cell, I have no clue why, the only words she ever said to me all my life were vile, full of poison. When they gave it to me I’d been so shocked that I just shoved it into my bag and still haven’t had the guts to open it.
Hayley had also gave her statement as is thankfully doing a lot better now and we have Asher to thank for that, he brought her back from wherever her mind decided to take her. She still takes to her bed most days, but she’s been venturing the house a little more over the last week…. Everywhere except the kitchen.
I’ve been inundated with visitors since it happened, with Sherri visiting almost every day. She was pissed that I hadn’t told her about being pregnant as soon as I found out but understood when I explained about the paternity and not knowing what I was going to do at first. It’s still in my thoughts every day that Gary may be my baby’s father, but I’ve been talking to Abi regularly about it and it’s been a little easier. The nightmares of the baby looking like him still come most nights though, but Reid swoops in and tells me how much he loved both of us already and that the baby will be part him even if biologically we find he isn’t.
He still hadn’t touched me sexually, even after getting the all clear from the doctor… it was making me very hormonal. I’ve been snapping at everyone who crosses me this last week, I even resorted to begging Reid to take me the other night. I laid on the bed in the new teddy that id ordered from bondora, waiting for him to come home from work, feeling sexier than ever, and a lot turned on. When he got home he looked like he was going to have a heart attack before storming back downstairs telling me he was off to blow off some steam at the gym. It’s infuriating!
The biggest plus to come out of the last few days was actually about Tiff, she turned up at the house a week after the attack, Reid went to chew her out and scare her off but I decided to hear what she had to say.
I said I’m going to start fighting for myself now, and this was where I wanted to begin.
She shocked the hell out of me and Reid when she apologised for what she had done, she deleted the video and pictures right in front of us and promised there was no copies. It may be a trick, but I can’t bring myself to care about it anymore. It all seems so mundane now after what we’ve been through.
Things seem to finally be settling now, I can finally get some sort of peace. I still have the trails to get through, but they have been put to the back of my mind for today as it’s my midwife appointment. Hopefully she tells me I can start teaching again.
I need something to get rid of this sexual frustration.
Chapter Nineteen
Laying down on the cold bed, me and Reid watch the screen as she scans my belly. It’s been two weeks since I saw this little peanut, and I’m shocked when I see how much he’s grown! “It’s all looking perfect Becca, growing nicely. Baby is measuring about about 6 weeks along at the moment, so you are still very early days, but so far so good” 6 weeks… that would mean there is more chance of the baby being Reid’s! “Can you pinpoint conception by any chance” I hope she can, I don’t want this hanging over me for the rest of my pregnancy “I can’t be 100%. But from 9 weeks pregnant we can do a paternity test while baby is still in the womb. It poses little risk, but there is still some” she says wiping the jelly off me “Do some research into it, and we can chat about it at your next appointment” I don’t want to risk my baby, but I need to know….
Feeling a little more positive, I suggest going to the shopping centre to look at baby stuff. I know its too early to buy anything, but I’m actually allowing myself to get a little exited. Reid is like a kid in a candy shop when we get to Mothercare, its adorable to see him getting so hyped up about this. I ended up having to drag him out after an hour, only buying one soft yellow blanket, I wasn’t going to get anything, but when I say it with the little peanut on it, I had to bring it home.
Today is Brady’s birthday, but trying to get Reid to go alone is infuriating. I get he’s worried about leaving me alone again, but Gary is in a cell right now, he can’t hurt me again. Trying to explain this to him proves to be fruitless, giving up I agree to order In and have a quiet movie night with him. I feel bad for not seeing Brady on his birthday, but who knows how I’ll react to being at a party rammed with people.
Hearing a knock at the door, Reid gets up to grab the food while I get some plates ready in the kitchen. Hayley and Asher decided to have an early night and are watching something upstairs, giving me and Reid a quiet night alone. Grabbing two cokes from the fridge, I wonder where he’s got to with our dinner? Walking to the front room I freeze when I see everyone, Sherri, Brady, Spencer and Gavin all stand there with giant smiles on their faces “Hey babe” Brady says walking over to give me a squeeze “What are you guys doing here? You should be celebrating at your party right now” I saw with a grin of my own “Wasn’t a party without my two best friends. You didn’t really expect me to have a birthday without you did ya?” he says bringing me in for another bear hug. “We all missed you like crazy lately. And we know you needed some time, but being cooped up in here is going to drive you mad” Sherri says when she steals me from Brady for her own hug. “So, we have come to kidnap both of you and take you to the garage for a hang out” Gavin says. How do I tell them I can’t be around loads of people at a party yet “Don’t worry, its just going to be us, like it should be” Sherri explains. I can’t believe they would do this for me, Brady loves a party, so for him to want a quiet one for his birthday is huge “Guys, I don’t know what to say” I say feeling the tears well up, these guys truly are the best friends I could have. “You say let’s go!” Spenser says grinning. Can I do this? They’re right when they say I’m going stir crazy in here, but am I ready for this?
Only one way to find out… “Let’s go”
Pulling up at the house, I start to think this is a bad idea, I can feel myself sweating already and I haven’t even got out of the car yet “Take as much time as you need” Reid says quietly as he grabs my hand, feeling him rubbing his thumb back and forth over my finders is calming me. After about 20 minuets of sitting in the car focusing on Reid, I finally get the courage to open the door. Breath…. You can do this.
It actually turns out pretty great, as they promised, its only us here, which massively helped my nerves. I’m still a little jumpy but it’s been an amazing night. After watching the band practice their set, we start singing happy birthday to Brady making his cheeks turn pink. Sitting on Reid’s lap, we spend the rest of the evening laughing and joking… it starts to feel like old times, I�
�m finally back where I belong.
Arriving home, I tell Reid I’m running up for a shower, let’s give this seducing thing one more try. I pull the teddy that I bought out of my draw and run to the bathroom locking the door. Stripping off my leggings and top, I lather myself in coco butter so my skin is smelling delicious, he’s bound to jump me this time. I’m actually shaking with how exited I’m getting, its been way too long since I’ve had my man!
Slipping the teddy over my head, I pull on the matching thong and fluff my hair to give it somebody. Looking at myself in the mirror I feel really sexy, I feel confident… I feel like a new me.
Walking back into the bedroom, I’m glad to see Reid is still talking to his mum, he can’t be much longer though so I need to hurry up! Running over to my bedside table, I yank it open and look for the bullet vibrator I stuffed down the back under my book. Jumping on the bed I lay down and get myself comfy, ready to give my boyfriend a show he won’t be able to resist.
Break my heart (Estate Series 1) Page 13