Ever Lonely (Ever James Band Book 1)

by Kimberly Lauren

  Both of Rhett’s hands gripped my ass, and he pushed forward. I held him impossibly tighter and pushed against him, creating a new friction. He bit his bottom lip, so I leaned forward and licked the injured lip and sucked it into my mouth. His groan only made me want to continue torturing that perfect bottom lip.

  Then it felt as if he was kissing and touching me everywhere all at once. He picked up his pace, and the new speed caused an incredible pressure to build up inside of me. I couldn't keep up with him. He was stronger than I was in this position, so I held on to his shoulders and let him work his magic. I hadn't realized the noises I was making until his hand covered my mouth.

  “Do you want them coming in here?” he asked with a smile in his voice.

  I shook my head vigorously against his hand while he continued to fuck me against the window. He groaned and pressed into me, my back pressed against the cold surface even harder, but I couldn’t care less. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now.

  “Fuck…” he cursed. “I shouldn’t be fucking you against a window in a retirement center. Not our first time…”

  I lowered my leg, and it caused him to slip out. A shiver ran down my spine at the loss of him. I grabbed his face between my hands and forced him to look at me. The stress was back in his eyes and I roughly kissed him, begging him with my mouth to come back to me.

  “What you shouldn’t be doing is stopping. Everything else is perfect,” I said against his mouth.

  A renewed determination crossed his face as he grabbed my ass again and lifted me off my feet completely. I wrapped my legs around his waist and held on to his neck. My back hit a cold mattress and I clung tightly to him, not allowing more than a few inches between us. He pushed back inside of me so quickly my eyes rolled back into my head. I cried out in pleasure before his mouth abruptly covered mine and stifled the sound.

  "Pipes, seriously, you have to cut it out. They’ll hear you. Not to mention, that raspy voice of yours is going to make me come way too early," he half growled, half whispered.

  He pushed my hands above my head and twined his fingers through mine as he pumped into me. I had a hard time looking away from his defined chest as it moved in front of me. If my hands were free, they’d be running across all of that skin, mouthwateringly.

  “Let me touch you,” I breathed out.

  He shook his head while burrowing his head into my neck. "It's embarrassing how much of a hair trigger I am right now."

  I tightened my muscles around him and he groaned. I felt the vibrations from deep in his chest. Rhett raised his head and glared down at me for teasing him when he was obviously so close to blowing. His lips covered my nipple, and I gasped as he sucked it roughly into his mouth while pushing inside of me faster. I felt him swell deliciously inside of me, and I told myself not to, but I couldn't contain the string of obscenities that flew from my lips.

  "Rhett… Rhett…" I piped out right before I was lost in the feeling of my orgasm squeezing around him over and over.

  I heard my name leave his lips continuously as tremors rocked his body and he pounded me into the mattress. My body would be imprinted into it long after we were done. He took a few breaths before he shuddered against me afterward. Since he had finally released my hands in the heat of his climax, I held onto his strong back and ran them up and down the smooth, damp skin.

  With his face still resting on my neck, I turned my head and sucked Rhett’s earlobe into my mouth. I just needed to feel him against me a little bit longer. I felt him twitch inside of me, and a groan spilled from both of our lips. After a few beats, I ran my tongue down and sucked on the sensitive skin under his ear. I couldn’t stop myself from moving on to his neck. I sucked hard enough to feel him jerk inside of me again, but not hard enough to leave a mark on his skin.

  I didn’t know what had overcome me. I had never felt this way before. Usually, when my partner and I had both finished, I was done. But I couldn’t get enough of him… couldn’t bring myself to pull away.

  When I felt him start to recover, I pushed back and eyed him with surprise. I didn’t know that was even possible. I pressed my breasts up against his chest and let my eyes close at the feeling of his warm skin grazing mine.

  "Again," he said, pushing up on his hands. The look of determination on his face surprised me. “I just need to change this condom,” he said but didn’t move from his position.

  “Oh God, I don’t know…” I moaned when he began to move in me again. “Oh God…”

  “Oh Rhett,” he corrected me. “And yes, again. I haven’t shot off that fast since I was a virgin. Weeks of foreplay had me ready to burst.”

  I laughed at his choice of words because I had been thinking the exact same thing earlier. As he slowly pushed in and out of me, I felt his phone buzz in the pocket of his jeans, which were hanging on for dear life around his hips. We both ignored the intrusive sound, and I grabbed my breasts, pushed them together, and offered them to him.

  A sexy growl in the back of his throat told me he enjoyed the suggestion. Just as his lips began to move across my hypersensitive skin, his phone began to buzz again and then we heard a familiar ringtone blaring from my purse. “Overprotected” by Britney Spears. So appropriate for Beau. When the song rang out again, I knew there was no ignoring him.

  “It’s Beau…” I complained.

  A knock sounded at the door, and Rhett pulled out of me like he had caught fire. “Fuck! I forgot! When we were leaving my dad’s room, I texted him that we were on our way down.”

  I pushed him aside, jumped from the bed, and ran over to where our clothes had been strewn about. “Shit, I told him the same thing. A thousand dollars says he’s seconds away from smashing in here. Trust me, you do not want him to see us like this.”

  “Rhett, honey…” Beth’s sweet voice filtered through the closed door as I was spinning my skirt back into place. “There’s a very intimidating man downstairs saying he needs to get in to check on Ever. I’m starting to get worried for the poor girls down in reception.”

  Rhett’s eyes were saucers as he rushed to pull his zipper closed. His used condom had already been discarded.

  “Sorry about that, Beth,” he called back. “That’s her security. We’re on our way out.” He pulled his shirt over his head, and I scooped up my jacket, shoved my arms through, and hurried toward the door. Beau would be breaking doors down if he didn't see me soon. Right as my hand reached for the knob, Rhett gently grabbed a hold of my shoulders and spun me around.

  "One second," he said. Then he released me and pulled his arms through his leather jacket and adjusted the attached gray hoodie.

  "I don’t really care for Beau knowing any more about my sex life than he already does." I moved for the doorknob again, but he pulled me away.

  “I’m only asking for one more second.” Rhett’s lips pressed against mine, his delicious tongue pushing past my lips, and I thawed to his touch. My hands grabbed the sides of his face and held him to me. We acted as if neither of us were ready for our bubble to burst quite yet.

  Then he softly pushed me away from him, and I stuck my lip out. “Any longer and you’ll be back up against that window, Pipes.”

  “Would that be so awful?” I teased him.

  "If I weren't about to be on TV in two days, I’d risk the black eye Beau would give me if we don’t get down there." He winked as he swung the door wide for us both to exit. “But we don't need that kind of attention.”

  — SIXTEEN —

  After the tongue-lashing from Beau and the insane walk through the crazed paparazzi outside of the building, we made it back to our hotel. Beau dropped us off at the entrance. He sent Mark, one of his lackeys, to escort us safely inside while he parked the car.

  Travelers were milling about the hotel lobby when we walked through the grand entrance. The employees all looked at us from the corners of their eyes as we passed, but they had been trained to not make a big deal out of t
heir high-profile guests. Mark stopped to talk to one of the hotel security officers. I frowned. Beau would have never left me to take the elevator all by myself. I was completely capable of doing it, of course, but I just wasn’t used to the freedom.

  I noticed Lola and Gage chatting in a couple of comfy chairs in front of a beautiful fireplace at the other end of the room. She spotted us instantly, and I watched her gaze at us for a long moment. I started to pull Rhett over toward them until Lola's mouth dropped open and she bolted upright. I knew that look.

  “Oh my God,” I whispered. Rhett looked down at me with confusion.

  Lola took a few steps toward us. I grabbed Rhett’s hand and hauled him away from her as quickly as possible.

  “What the hell?” he asked.

  “She knows.”

  “She knows what?” Rhett probed.

  As we hightailed it toward the elevator, I glanced around to see if anyone was within hearing distance. “She knows we… had… you know…”

  “Sex?” He smirked. “How would she know something like that?”

  “She always knows. She takes one look at me and just knows. She’s like a freaking orgasm bloodhound.”

  Rhett's smirk morphed into a cocky smile. "Well, I did—"

  “Don’t even go there,” I quickly interrupted while dropping his hand. I looked back and saw that Lola had given up the chase. She was sitting next to Gage again, but I didn’t miss that little grin on her face.

  When we reached the elevator bank, my finger stabbed the button to call it down. I continued glancing around the lobby. I could never figure out if I was afraid of strangers or happy to have them around. Rhett stared at the lit numbers ticking down, signaling which car would appear first.

  My phone vibrated, and I looked down to see what Lola had to say.

  Oh, we WILL be talking later. You can’t run away from me forever.

  Rhett’s hip bumped into mine, and I looked up to see a young teenage girl openly gawking at me. When my eyes locked on to hers, her face immediately lit up and she began searching her pockets frantically. Probably for a camera phone or paper for us to sign.

  Rhett grabbed my hand and yanked me into the now open elevator doors. I heard the pounding of feet, and he pushed the button repeatedly, forcing the door to close faster. Right before our little fan and security detail could enter, the doors slid closed.

  “Sorry, but I’ve had enough for today,” he grunted.

  “Rhett! We can’t be rude to them,” I reprimanded.

  “If it had been just her, I wouldn’t have done it,” he replied through gritted teeth. Then he slid my key card into the slot that allowed us to access the thirty-second floor. “Did you not see the twenty other girls standing in the lobby, ready to join her?”

  "We could have spoken to twenty of them... that's nothing..."

  Slowly, with each word accentuated, he said, “Ever, it’s okay to take a break.” The elevator chimed, indicating we’d arrived at our floor. Rhett peeked down the hallway—I assumed to see if it was vacant—and then grabbed my hand to pull me forward. I relished the feeling of his big hand clasped tightly with mine. “Christ, it’s like you’re afraid to be out of the limelight for even a second.”

  My hand ripped from his and I bit back, “Of course I am! That’s what this entire business is built around. This is my career. If they lose interest, then I don’t have a job!”

  "If they lose interest because you didn't sign twenty autographs on top of the hundred you already did this morning…" When I gaped at him, he said, "That's right, I know all about how you wake up at the crack of dawn and sign autographs for everyone that camps outside of your hotel."

  “I have trouble sleeping.”

  “Do something normal then!” He threw his hands in the air. “Drink some tea, or hell, write a song! Don’t give every last bit of yourself away.”

  “I’ve written plenty of songs!” I yelled back at him. “If you hadn’t noticed, we wrote almost half of an album in a matter of weeks. Don’t tell me what I should do with my time. I’ve gotten where I am now because I gave every last bit of myself.”

  "My point is, if your so-called fans lose interest because you didn't sign every single insignificant little item they throw at you, then your singing wasn't that great to begin with, now was it?"

  A gasp tore through my lips. I turned on my heel and headed for the suite.

  “I’m sorry, Ever...” he called out. “I just don’t understand how you can be so insecure and yet appear to be the epitome of confidence at the same time.”

  “Wow, nice back-handed compliment, Rhett! You don’t think I don’t know I’m insecure? Trust me, I know all about my insecurities. Who wouldn’t when they’re pointed out to you on a daily basis for the entire world to see? I have the media nitpicking on every little thing about my appearance. Even down to the damn freckles on my face! And then on the flip side, I live in a world where everything I do is great, amazing, the best ever! But none of it was actually my idea. I live in a constant state of self-doubt because of it, and I don’t need it to be pointed out—especially not by you.”

  I furiously tried jabbing the keycard in and out of the door slot, but it wasn’t cooperating. Rhett pressed his body up against the backside of mine and covered my hand with his. Air rushed out of me when I felt the heat of his body leaching into my skin.

  Without removing his hand from mine, he whispered, “I’m sorry. That didn’t come out the way it was supposed to. You’re turning me into a bumbling idiot.”

  “I know what you intended." I tried to sound bitter, but the sting had almost left my voice. He pocketed my key card and turned me around without stepping back. The length of my body melted against his, as if I were the candle wax and he was the flame. Rhett lifted my chin so that I was looking up into his eyes.

  “No, I don’t think you do. You think I just insulted your singing. In a back-asswards way, I was trying to say you should let your talent speak for itself. You don’t need to constantly feed your fan base with attention to keep them around. Your voice does that on its own. Don’t let your insecurities win. You know that I love your voice. I know you understand what your singing does to me. I know you’ve seen it. Felt it." When I swallowed roughly, I could tell he knew he had hit his mark. His fingers combed from the back of my neck up into my hair, and he held on tenderly—yet tightly enough that he kept my rapt attention.

  “Your voice could bring me out of the darkest depression, Ever. I love that second when my heart seizes right before you start singing because I know what’s coming and I know how it’s going to make me feel. I can tell that I’m becoming addicted to that sensation.”

  I moved my hands back to brace myself against the door, and Rhett moved even closer to me until his lips grazed mine. I told myself it wasn't a kiss. The intimate contact reminded me that we were back at the hotel, the place where Noah possibly still thought he lived. My heart sunk at the thought of having to convince him—again—that we weren’t together. But I knew I needed to make sure things were completely resolved before I stood out here in the hallway practically coming undone at the slightest touch. Kissing was off limits until then.

  Rhett’s soft lips once again brushed against mine—that didn’t count as a kiss, did it?—before I could verbalize my thoughts. Then his words ensured I couldn’t even think straight. "If I didn't see you every day, I would call you just to hear you speak. I couldn’t stand not to hear that sexy rasp in your voice that drives me insane.”

  My eyes fluttered closed, and the non-kiss was starting to feel very intimate with our bodies leaning into one another. I couldn't stop myself from pushing my lips further against his. It was not a kiss... but fuck, did I love it. Denial was a real place. Why hadn't I yelled and screamed earlier until Noah had no other choice but to accept my breakup?

  Rhett and I had kissed so many times today. Too many times. Not enough times. What we did earlier was wrong. But it felt
so right. The devil on my shoulder didn't regret a second of it, but the angel on my shoulder told me I needed to put my big girl panties on and finish things with Noah. My guilt for doing this right here where Noah could see us was eating at me.

  With my hands up against Rhett’s chest and my lips firmly pressed against his, I realized that it was a lot like a kiss. Even if our mouths weren't moving, I knew we were both enjoying the feel of the other a little too much.

  This was a kiss.

  We shouldn’t kiss.

  This was wrong.

  Fuck.

  I felt him pull back and place his hands on either side of my head against the door behind me. Slowly, my eyes opened at the loss of his lips on mine

  “We can’t keep doing this,” he said softly, staring at me with those beautiful blue eyes. How did he…could he read my thoughts now? “I can’t be the other guy. I’ve never been the other guy.” I hated the fact that he was carrying guilt as well. I did that to him.

  “What if I want you to be the guy?” I whispered back.

  A small smiled pulled at his lips, but it looked forced and almost as if he were pained by my words. Shit, why did he look like that was exactly what he did and did not want to hear all at the same time? “I can’t be your rebound either.”

  I grabbed both sides of his face. “Rebound? You could never be a rebound. A rebound is used for getting over a broken heart. Noah doesn’t even exist in my world when you’re in it, and he certainly hasn’t broken my heart. No one else matters. I want you.”

  “Ever, you just told me earlier today we couldn't be in a relationship. It was too much of a risk… to our careers, to the band, to other people's jobs.” How could that have been today? I felt as if we had lived a thousand days since this morning.

  I sighed. “It’s all still true. I still feel obligated to put it all first. But does it make me a horrible person that I don’t want to anymore?”