BLISS

by A. R. Breck

  “Oh my…” My voice trails off when I reach up and run my fingers across the glazed rock piece. Art is what this is.

  Mount Rushmore is built from this piece of rock, constructed into the most beautiful stone piece I’ve ever seen. Glazed over, it’s shiny and smooth and looks to be about a million dollars.

  Years ago, my parents and I went to South Dakota and camped in Custer and went to go see Mount Rushmore. It was one of my favorite vacations, and this rock makes me feel so connected to that memory.

  I want it.

  I look around, suddenly overcome with a thought that’s never crossed my mind in a million years.

  Should I?

  Never in a million years have I thought about stealing something or taking something that wasn’t mine.

  But suddenly, nothing sounds better.

  I look around, feeling extra confident inside of this store that’s overly packed with knick knacks. I reach up, and grabbing the stone, I slide it into my oversized purse. It bulges, and I adjust it, so it doesn’t look so obvious.

  Suddenly unsure, my hazy eyes look around, and seeing no one, I start speed walking out of the store. My face flames, and I’m sure I look guilty as hell.

  Because you are guilty, dumbass!

  I get to the doors, and stepping over the door frame, I’m relieved when the alarm doesn’t go off. Where would they put one of the alarm sensors on a stone anyway?

  “Excuse me, Miss?” A voice barks from behind me.

  I stop in my tracks, my eyes widening and my entire body locking up at that voice. Slowly, I turn around, and feel my entire body deflate when I see an oversized man in a security uniform.

  “Miss, will you come with me please?” He holds his arm out, and I debate on how quickly I could get away with him.

  Considering his legs nearly go up to my chest, I think my chances are absolutely none.

  I nod my head, swallowing the sudden oversized knot sitting there.

  I’m so screwed.

  I follow him, and he keeps an eye on me at all times. He thinks I’m going to run for it.

  Not today, buddy. I’m so high I can barely feel my legs.

  We walk through the store and end up in the back. There’s a door, and when he opens it, we pass through a tiny room filled with a ton of small cameras. One of them is pointed directly where I was standing.

  Great. I’m the worst shoplifter ever. Who doesn’t even look for cameras?

  “Please, take a seat.” He points to a metal chair that looks like it belongs in prison.

  “Am I going to jail?” I ask on a wobble.

  He looks down at me like he’s disappointed in me. You don’t even know me, bro!

  “Sit down.” He orders.

  I slink into the chair like a chastised child and look down at my shoes.

  “Mind if I search your bag?” He asks.

  I push it towards him. When he opens it up, he takes out the beautiful stone that I so desperately wanted to help with this shitty day. But all it did in the end was make things worse. He sets it down on the chair next to mine. I hear him huff, and walking away from me, he goes over to the desk and starts grabbing for papers.

  Maybe I am going to jail. Is he going to call the police?

  He comes back with a stack of papers and says, “I’m going you to need to call your parents.”

  I frown at him. “My parents are dead.”

  He blusters, his face paling for a second before asking, “How old are you?”

  “Seventeen.” I lift my chin, happy to have caught him off guard.

  “Okay then, you’re still a minor. I’m going to need to call your guardian. What’s their name?” He levels me a look, and I already know he’s dealt with way worse than me.

  “Dave.” Back to feeling chastised.

  “How ‘bout this. You give Dave a call while I make the police report.” He must be feeling bad for me.

  “Police report! You’re calling the police?” I cry out.

  “It’s protocol, kid. Sorry, but I have to.”

  I grab the stone from the chair and hold it out to him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to take it. I mean, obviously I took it, but I shouldn’t have, and I realize that. I’ve never stolen before. Please! I won’t ever do it again.” Tears spring to my eyes, thoughts of Dave kicking me out and going to foster care being the first thing to pop into my mind.

  He grabs the stone from my hands and sets it on his desk. “Call Dave.” He grabs a pen and goes to sit at his desk, starting on the mountain of paperwork that will forever label me a criminal.

  I pull out my phone and prepare to call Dave. Ugh, I’ve been such a bitch to everyone this past week and it’s all because of today. If I would have just told Dave, I’m sure he would have done something to take my mind of the entire day. Instead, I was rude, ended up stealing, and now getting a big fat criminal stamped on my record.

  Scrolling through my contacts, I come across Aeron’s name and pause.

  Could I?

  I’m about to skip the entire idea when thoughts of calling Dave rush through my mind again.

  I push call before I think better of it, my heart thumping in my ears and the drugs are making my hands shake like crazy.

  Now that I think about it, my entire being is shaking and twitchy.

  Holy shit.

  “Mercy.” Aeron growls through the phone. His voice zings right between my thighs and I want to melt against my phone screen, except I can’t.

  Not right now.

  “Dave.” I clear my throat.

  “Uh, its—”

  “Dave, listen. I’m in trouble, and I’m going to need you to come get me.”

  I hear a heavy sigh on the other line, then, “Where are you?”

  “The mall, with security.”

  I hear a click, and pulling the phone off my ear, I see Aeron disconnected.

  I frown, and when I look up I see the security guard staring at me.

  “Uh, Dave’s not happy.” I clear my throat again and push my phone into my purse.

  “Well, is he coming?”

  “Um, yes. He’s on his way.” I look around, trying to ignore the security guard as he fills out the paperwork. I don’t want to watch him throw my life away, even if I’m the one that really threw it away by making a stupid decision.

  I look over at the cameras, watching the world outside this small room go on without me. People keep living, shopping, and having fun while I sit in here and everything has paused.

  I sit there and tell the guard my basic information while we wait. Eventually, I see a flash of color cross the screen. I wouldn’t think anything of it, but by the way my heart stops, I know.

  I just know.

  A minute later, there’s a knock at the door. The security guard presses his hands on his thighs and pushes himself up, and for a moment I think I could have really gotten away from him.

  The door opens, and there stands a worker with a furious looking Aeron standing behind him.

  The guard narrows his eyes and looks back at me. “Is this a joke? I didn’t ask you to get ahold of a friend. You need to contact your guardian.”

  “Excuse me, what’s your name?” Aeron stands tall and walks right up to the man who hulks over even him.

  “Officer Hamilton.” He reaches a hand out, and Aeron shakes it with him.

  “My name is David Reid. Officer Hamilton, do you mind telling me what’s going on here?”

  I have to bite my lip to hold in my snort. He sounds so professional and so unlike him. My eyes want to roll in the back of my head for how hard I’m holding in my laugh.

  “You’re this young lady’s guardian?” Officer Hamilton points at me, and I frown at him.

  “Is there a problem?” Aeron/Dave asks.

  “I’m sorry, can I see an ID?”

  “No, I’m sorry. If you aren’t going to tell me what’s going on with my…ward, then I’m thinking we’re going to have a real problem.”

  Offi
cer Hamilton stands down. “I caught Mercy in the store about an hour ago shoplifting this piece right here.” He lifts it in front of Aeron.

  Aeron’s forehead wrinkles in confusion. Looking over at me, he gives me a questioning look. I look away from him, completely ignoring him.

  “Mercy? Did you shoplift this?” Aeron uses his most orderly voice.

  I nod my head yes.

  Aeron lets out a deep breath.

  “Okay. So, Officer Hamilton, what are our next steps?” Aeron crosses his arms over his chest and waits for direction.

  “I’m going to be filing this police report today. You’ll receive a letter in the mail with a court date. You will both have to appear. Usually it’s pretty informal, you plea guilty and get some community service. That’s, unless, you’ve had prior convictions. Then we’re talking an entirely different situation.”

  Aeron’s heard enough. “Thank you for your time, Officer Hamilton. I promise you; this will not happen again. Let’s go, Mercy.” He reaches down and grabs onto my wrist, hauling me up and pulling me along with him.

  Officer Hamilton looks at us odd but walks to the door and opens it. “Have a good day, Mr. Reid.”

  Aeron keeps ahold of my wrist, pulling me along and squeezing so tightly I whimper in pain. He still doesn’t stop.

  He keeps this going all the way to his car. Hitting the unlock button, I feel like even the beep of the lock sounds angry. I tear my wrist out of his grasp, giving him a scowl as I open the door and get inside. He looks at me with fury but lets me get away.

  Opening up his own door, he gets in with angry jerks and slams the door.

  “What the fuck, Mercy?” He shouts at me.

  “Please take me home.” I look out the window.

  “No! I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what the fuck just happened in there. You’re stealing now?”

  “Take me home, please.” I whisper, my eyes filling up. Now with embarrassment and guilt. Aeron is only making things worse.

  “What the fuck are you trying to take a rock for, anyway?”

  I whip my gaze around to his. “A rock? It’s not just a fucking rock, Aeron.”

  He rears back, widening his eyes. “It sure looked like a rock to me. What else was it, then? Why was it so important that you had to steal it? You have the money. We have the money to buy it.”

  “It’s not about that!” I yell, batting away my tears with my hand.

  “What is it then, Mercy? What was the point of coming to the mall and taking something that you can already afford?”

  I look at him. Really look at him. My jitters are starting to calm down, and in its place is an exhaustion unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. I could melt into this leather seat and never come out.

  “Can you take me home, please?” My eyes leak uncontrollably. I don’t even wipe them away anymore.

  “Not until you let me know what happened.”

  I bang my head against the headrest, letting out the most excruciating groan. “I don’t want to talk about it!”

  “Fucking tell me, Mercy!” He shouts.

  “It’s my mom’s birthday, okay? It’s my mom’s birthday today, and I wanted to get something for me! Now, would you take me the fuck home? Please!”

  I bury my face in my hands, and cry. I hear a sigh beside me, and then he turns on the car, and when the car starts moving, I can only hope that he’s bringing me home.

  “I have another question for you.”

  “Hmm.” I mumble, not ready to show my face yet.

  “Did I ever say it would be okay for you to take some cocaine from my bedroom?”

  My head snap up, and I look at him with wide bloodshot eyes and snot running down my face. “What?”

  He looks at me, a nasty smile with a look like a viper written across his face. “You heard me. Rifling through my room. Taking my stash. It’s not fucking Tylenol, Mercy. And this isn’t some petty pills that you’ve taken. That’s real heavy shit and you could have gotten fucked up.”

  “I’m still here.”

  “Barely! Look at you. Stealing? You look fucking coked out, too, by the way.”

  I whip down the visor and look at myself, horrified by my red eyes that have huge bags under them. I try to downplay it, though, wiping my nose and then swiping the smeared mascara underneath my eyes. “I’m fine.”

  “You’re not fine. You look terrible.”

  I scowl at him.

  He scowls back. “I’m serious. Don’t dig into shit you don’t want to step in, babe.”

  “Fine. I’m sorry for digging in your stash, okay? But to be honest, I was just looking for a couple pills. I ran out yesterday…” I look up at him beneath my ashes, “Do you think I could have a couple more?”

  He barks out a laugh, “You can’t be serious.” He looks over at me, and when I cringe heavily, he balks, “Are you for real right now?”

  The more he looks at me, the more self-conscious I feel. “Never mind.” I say, then think better of it. “I’ll take some of what I had earlier, too.”

  He slams on his brakes and takes a quick left turn into an empty parking lot. He shifts into park and turns to me, “What are you asking me right now?”

  I look at him. Then look at him some more. “I’m asking for some drugs!” I blurt out, face flaming red. I never thought it would get to this.

  I don’t know how I feel, but this… urgency to use overtakes me. I feel panicked at the thought of being without it.

  He gives me a look and shifts into park, driving around the side of the building and going around to the back. We end up in a back alleyway, and it looks sketchy as hell.

  When he parks and reaches between my legs, I’m about to slap him for thinking I’ll slut myself out for some drugs, but when he pops open the glovebox, a drug-mine opens up in front of me.

  “Shit.”

  “Shit is right. Don’t think you can go around taking this shit on the daily. It’s also not like pills. You don’t need much at all. You took too much earlier. You’re lucky you’re even upright. You could have OD’d. Don’t do that shit again.” He scowls at me, reaching down and grabbing a white bag and metal tin. He pulls the stuff out, working silently as he scoops out small bits of white powder and lining it up on the metal plate. Using his pointer finger, he makes two small lines the sticks his pointer into his mouth, running it along the upper side of his gums.

  Fuck.

  “Ready?” He still doesn’t seem very happy with me, but at least he’s helping me.

  “Yeah.” My mouth waters. I think I’ve fully come down now, and I’m less and less liking the feeling of being around myself.

  I hate this.

  “Go ahead then.” He nods his head, and leaning down, I feel like a pro as I sniff up my tiny line and squeeze my eyes shut when the head rush hits. It’s not as strong as before, but it still blows my mind and makes a head rush flow through me at rapid speed.

  “Good?” I hear in the background. I nod my head, lean my head back and press my fingers into my eye lids. My blood starts pumping and it feels like I can actually feel the rushing of blood flowing through my veins.

  I hear a sniff, and imagine Aeron, with his curly hair dangling in front of his face as he snorts up his own line.

  I open my eyes and watch as Aeron shoves the supplies back into the glove box and then shuts it. “Let’s go home.”

  His voice is short. Too short.

  “Are you mad at me?”

  He sniffs. “Yeah.”

  My heart pauses a beat. “You hate me now?”

  He looks over at me. “No, Mercy. I don’t hate you. I’m just really fucking pissed at you right now. Don’t take my shit again without me knowing. And you steal something again? I’m going to whoop your ass all the way back to Aurora Falls.” He curls up his upper list in annoyance, shifting into drive and heading home.

  “Are you going to tell your dad?”

  “Shut up, Mercy.”

  17

>   Mercy

  When we get home, Aeron slams his door shut, the sound ten times louder in this large garage. I wince, silently following him into the garage.

  “Go to your room.” He barks.

  I look at him sideways. “Um, excuse me? You’re not your father.”

  “You bet I’m not. I’ll make things ten times worse that my dad ever would. You better believe that.” He opens up the refrigerator, grabbing a beer and twisting the cap off, taking a long pull from the beer. With his head tipped back, I watch him swallow and swallow and swallow, my eyes zoning onto his Adams apple.

  With the sound of glass slamming on a counter, my eyes fly up to his.

  “Go to your fucking room, Mercy. Don’t make me tell you again.”

  I turn around and walk up to my room, because I’m high and scared of what Aeron will do if I don’t listen to him.

  When I’m halfway up the stairs, I hear him whisper shit underneath his breath, and feel just an inkling of relief that he’s as confused as I am with our relationship.

  ~

  Later that night, I’m lying in my bed, relaxed and feeling better than ever. After I came up to my room, I’ve been staring at my ceiling, fading in and out of sleep. I don’t know what it is, but this… coke—I hate admitting it—is one million times better than the pills Aeron gave me. It’s crazy. I feel on top of the world.

  I feel wired but calm. Like I can finally relax, but like I should go and run a marathon. So, I’ve just been lying in my room and staring at my ceiling. I feel like I should go and do something, apologize to Aeron. Maybe figure out an excuse to Dave in case Aeron decides to spill what happened.

  But I don’t do anything.

  I just… lay here.

  My legs and arms twitch, adrenaline making my body feel wired, when I feel my door crack open.

  I lift my head and see Aeron standing in my doorway.

  I sit up, feeling the world spin for a minute before saying, “What’re you doing in here?”

  He walks in, looking stressed but determined. Like he’s been sitting on his thoughts forever and they finally exploded. “I’ve been thinking.”

  My body locks up from his tone. He sounds so resolved in whatever he’s thinking about. It makes me nervous.

  “About what?” I ask apprehensively.