His to Seek

by Elena Aitken

  After they’d made love, moments before she’d fallen asleep, she’d asked him whether he’d come with her to Jackson Valley to see her grandfather.

  Of course, the answer was yes. Without a hesitation, which was why he’d told her that without a doubt, he’d be by her side; however she needed him to show up, he’d be there. Absolutely.

  What he hadn’t told her was that he was needed in New York for meetings and then, later in the week, in Seattle. There were decisions to be made and votes to be taken and they couldn’t wait much longer. Phillip was already freaking out because he’d pushed everything back and made up stories about where Cyrus was—a detail he still hadn’t shared, not even with Phillip. Cyrus couldn’t put it off forever. He’d sworn to his business manager he’d be in New York for the meeting in two days.

  But if Natalia needed him, it couldn’t be a choice. There wasn’t a choice. It would be her. It had to be her.

  Surely the suppliers and project managers would all understand that he couldn’t be there? But he already knew the answer—they wouldn’t. He’d been working hard to secure the right materials and builders for the solar panel water project and they were under a tight deadline. If he wanted to get the panels installed before the dry season, which was when the villages would need them most, he had to move quickly. And because it was his project, almost all of the managers refused to deal with anyone but him. They wanted the reassurances that could only come from Cyrus Steele.

  Which was why he couldn’t sleep.

  How could he choose between supporting his mate when she needed him most and providing fresh water for thousands of people in Third World countries?

  With a sigh, he wiggled as gently as he could out from under Natalia’s arm and slipped from the bed. His bear was going crazy inside with his indecisiveness. He needed a release.

  Cyrus made his way downstairs into the now dark room. Everyone had long since gone to bed, so he didn’t worry about being spotted as he walked straight outside. He left his clothes in a chair on the porch and in two steps, leapt to the ground, shifting as he jumped.

  It felt good to stretch his muscles and by the time he hit the ground, he was already at full speed. Cyrus charged into the forest as fast as he could. A good run always cleared his head and helped him think straight. At least it used to.

  When was the last time he’d even had a chance to release his bear, let alone give it the chance to help him feel better about whatever it was that was troubling him?

  He knew the answer clearly. He’d been able to shift a few times, but it had been months since he had a really good run with his bear. Almost ten to be exact, a week before his father had died. They’d gone together. It had been his dad’s idea.

  “Son, you’re troubled,” he’d said. “Come.” It hadn’t been a question, and Cyrus didn’t fight it. He’d stood from his desk where he’d been trying, unsuccessfully, to go over the financial statements, and followed his dad through the office and out the back door. Wellington Steele had been a smart man, and not only when it came to business. As an alpha Kodiak, he’d recognized the importance of being able to shift and release stress as much as possible, which was why he’d built the headquarters for Steele Industries out of town, surrounded by wild forest. At a moment’s notice, they could escape into the woods, shift, and go for a mind-clearing run.

  Which was exactly what they’d done that day.

  Cyrus thought he’d been doing a good job hiding his unhappiness, but he should have known better. After a long, hard run through the woods, father and son had come out to a clearing that overlooked the valley below. Still in their bears, his father sat first, and Cyrus followed suit. For a few minutes they sat and stared out over the town and buildings below, many of which were owned by their family.

  “One day this will be yours.”

  Automatically, the way he always did, Cyrus shook his head.

  “It will,” his father said without speaking.

  He turned his massive head and looked at him. For the first time, Cyrus noticed the gray fur, the tired look in his dad’s eyes, and it struck him in a way it never had before. His father was getting old.

  “As you know,” his father continued, “you’ll have great responsibility. Lots of people depend on us. Our employees, their families, their children. It’s up to you to make sure Steele Industries continues to thrive. It’s a big responsibility, Cyrus. One you’ll need to rise to.”

  And there it was: the weight that was ever present settled a little deeper on Cyrus’s heart. He’d known since he was a little boy that one day Steele Industries would be his. And almost as soon as he’d known it, he’d also known he hadn’t wanted it. Not that he didn’t value what his father had created, or how hard he’d worked to turn family money into an undeniable dynasty. He did. Very much.

  But it wasn’t who Cyrus was. He wanted to travel, see the world, find a mate, and make a difference. All things he couldn’t do if he stayed on Kodiak Island.

  Still, Cyrus didn’t speak. He turned again to look out over the place he’d always called home. He loved the island, but it didn’t stop him from wanting more.

  “I’m sorry, son.” The change in his father’s voice caught him, and Cyrus turned to look at him. He could see the sadness reflected in his dad’s gray eyes. “I know you don’t want this.”

  Cyrus couldn’t have been more stunned if his father had told him he was selling it all. He opened his mouth to object, but closed it again. There was no point lying to him.

  “I’ve always known,” he continued. “And if there was any other way, I’d take it. I would have liked to give you a brother, a sister, someone who…” He trailed off and Cyrus dropped his head. He knew how hard it had been on his dad when Cyrus’s mother had died. She’d been irreplaceable. There was never going to be any siblings. “I’m sorry, Cyrus.”

  * * *

  Cyrus still had trouble believing that had already been ten months ago.

  It was likely that his father had never been to Grizzly Ridge, or the Montana woods that Cyrus now ran through. But even so, he could feel his father next to him, matching him stride for stride as if he were running right alongside, the way they’d done so many times before. Cyrus felt the loss keenly. And it wasn’t just the man he’d always felt was invincible, but also the loss of his freedom and future as he stepped into the role that was expected of him.

  Cyrus ran until his muscles burned from the exertion. And when he was finished, he knew what he had to do.

  Business could wait. Family had to come first. Always.

  Chapter Ten

  Jackson Valley, and the home Natalia grew up in, was only a few hours’ drive down the highway, but it might as well have been a world away. It had been almost a year since Nat had been back to visit, choosing instead to keep moving from place to place. And as soon as they turned off the highway onto the gravel road that would lead her to her grandfather’s house, she remembered why.

  Jackson Valley felt suffocating. The air felt thicker, the mood more intense since her cousins had left. That was when everything changed. Her grandfather had withdrawn, becoming even more closed-off and more strict than before. He’d always led with an iron fist, but after he cast out half of his grandchildren, it only got worse.

  While Cyrus drove, Nat let herself get lost in the memories of her childhood, a happier time. She stared out the window and saw the clearing they used to play in, the tip of the lake peeking through the trees where they’d escape on hot summer days to swing from a rope into the glacial-cold waters. And then as they got closer, the lane for the house she’d grown up in with her brothers and her mother. It was set back from the main house. A small ranch style, it was only three bedrooms, but big enough for the four of them. Especially because as children they spent most of their time outside, or up at the main house with the others.

  “Just up that road is where I grew up.” She pointed it out for Cyrus’s sake, the way she thought she should, not because she tho
ught he would care. But he did.

  “Do you want me to turn in?”

  She shook her head. “No one will be there. My mom and Liam moved up to the big house after Axel and the others were banished. It was just Ryker and me who stayed and after we left…well, I can’t imagine anyone is there.” She took another look out the window toward where she knew her childhood home was just beyond that stand of pines.

  “Okay.” Cyrus smiled and slid his hand over to her thigh. His reassuring squeeze gave her the strength she didn’t even know she needed. That was the thing about Cyrus. In only a few days of knowing him, of being mated to him, she felt stronger than ever before. As if she could face anything. She’d never once considered that she might need the strength of a mate, and it’s not that she needed it now. Just that it empowered her even more than before. It was like one of those power-ups in the old video games her brothers used to play.

  She laughed a little at her own analogy and when Cyrus gave her a questioning glance, she shook her head. “I was just thinking about how nice it is for you to be here doing this with me,” she said honestly. “I don’t know why, but I’m nervous. And I shouldn’t be. He’s my grandfather, and I love him.” She took a breath and blinked back the tears that had been growing more and more insistent as they got closer. “And he’s dying.” Cyrus squeezed her thigh again. “But it’s not that…it’s…” She looked across the seat to him and she offered him a small smile.

  “That you’re mated to a Kodiak,” he finished for her. “He’s not going to be happy and you don’t want to disappoint him.”

  She nodded and a tear slipped down her cheek.

  “You won’t, Nat.” He sounded so confident and she wanted to believe him so badly, but he didn’t know Gordon Jackson the way she did. “He loves you,” Cyrus continued. “And love runs deeper than any old clan laws.”

  “I hope you’re right.” She exhaled a deep breath and pointed down the lane to the big log house where they were headed. “There it is,” she said, as if he hadn’t already seen it. “That’s my home.”

  The room was dim, lit only by a single lamp on the nightstand. But that didn’t prevent Natalia from seeing her grandfather clearly the moment she set foot into this room. She’d managed to slip past mostly unnoticed by the handful of people, most of whom she recognized as Jackson clan members, but there were a few she’d never seen before. Not that she cared. She was there for one reason only: to see her grandfather.

  Natalia approached his bedside cautiously, not sure whether she wanted to wake him or not. She couldn’t shake the nerves she’d had ever since getting in the car earlier. Despite his reputation for toughness, Nat had always been mostly immune to his gruffness. She had no reason to be nervous. Not that she could tell her bear that. Inside, she was a nervous wreck.

  So much so that when Gordon cleared his throat with a raspy cough, Nat jumped back a few feet.

  “Natalia? Is that you?”

  She nodded. “Yes, Grandpa. It’s me.”

  “Well, for goodness’ sake, what the hell are you doing over there, jumping around like a newborn deer? I’m not going to bite, you know?”

  She laughed a little and with her nerves settled slightly, she crossed the distance to his bedside.

  “It’s just cancer,” he said when she got closer. “And some heart failure,” he added. “I’m dying. But it’s not contagious. Come closer.”

  She did as she was told and he reached for her hand. She took his in hers and had to work to hide the shock from her face. He was so frail. So weak. Her big, strong grandfather was little more than skin and bones. “How did this…you…when…”

  “Stop stuttering, girl.”

  “How did this happen so fast? I just saw you.”

  “You haven’t been home for almost a year.”

  A pang of guilt hit her heart. It was true. Even when she’d gone to Axel and Harper’s wedding in September, she hadn’t made the short trip home. There was no excuse.

  “But you were fine then.”

  “No.” He shook his head. “The cancer’s been spreading for a while now. The ticker just couldn’t keep up anymore.” He used his free hand to pat his chest. “I’m glad you came,” he said after a minute. “You’ve always been my favorite.”

  Nat laughed, but when Gordon didn’t crack a smile, she said, “That’s not true. You’ve always loved all of us.”

  “Maybe.” He nodded. “But you’ve always been my favorite. That’s the truth.”

  She let his words settle in. She knew in her heart it was true and it always had been. Even though the boys got more attention because they were being groomed to take over the clan, Gordon Jackson always had a soft spot for his granddaughters. Especially Nat.

  “It’s good to see you, Grandpa. I wish you weren’t…I wish I’d…”

  “Don’t waste a wish on something so daft. I’m an old man. It was only a matter of time.”

  They stayed that way for a moment before he tugged a little on her hand. “Sit,” he said. “It’s past time we talked.”

  It was important for Nat to see her grandfather without him. They would have a lot to talk about and neither of them wanted that conversation to be clouded by the fact that she’d chosen an unsuitable mate.

  Cyrus knew it weighed heavily on her. He also knew he played a big role in that. After all, he was the mate.

  Either way, he was happy to wait outside, away from the prying eyes of the Jackson clan. Not that there weren’t any outside. He raised his hand in what he hoped was a friendly wave as a pair of women walked past. No doubt they’d go directly inside and report to whomever they were reporting to that there was a strange man—who was definitely not a grizzly—in the yard.

  Cyrus shook it off and pulled his cell phone out. He’d been doing a good job ignoring the vibrating that was almost constant the entire drive to Jackson Valley, but he couldn’t ignore it forever. He took a breath, and ignoring all of the unheard messages, pressed the number to call Phillip.

  “What the hell?” Phillip answered on the first ring. “Where have you been, Cyrus? I can’t put these meetings off forever and you know as well as I do that if you don’t make an appearance, all of these contractors are going to walk.”

  “Hi to you, too.” He tried to keep his voice light.

  “Cyrus.”

  There was a warning tone to his business manager’s voice, and Cyrus knew he couldn’t push it too much further. No doubt Phillip was already strung as tight as he could go. The last thing he needed was the man to snap completely. He needed Phillip and they both knew it.

  “Sorry, Phillip.” He shook his head and looked at the ground. “I really am. I don’t…” He trailed off, unwilling to make an excuse. “I’m sorry,” he said again instead. “I dropped the ball and I left you to pick it up. I really am sorry.”

  There was a deep sigh on the other end of the line. “Tell me you’re on a plane.”

  “I can’t do that.”

  “You can’t tell me that, or you can’t get on a plane?”

  Cyrus looked to the long, low log house his mate had disappeared into. “Both,” he answered honestly. He couldn’t leave Natalia alone while her grandfather was dying. He just couldn’t. He needed to be there for her.

  “That’s not the answer I need, Cyrus. You need to be here or this entire project will fall apart. Never mind everything else.”

  Cyrus winced. He’d largely ignored the running of Steele Industries, leaving most of it—okay, all of it—to Phillip. The man really did deserve a raise. But the solar panel project had definitely taken priority. It meant too much; he couldn’t let it fall apart.

  “Look.” He shook his head. “Something has come up here and I—”

  “Where is here?” Phillip interrupted him. “You were in the Bahamas researching the panels. You were supposed to be on a plane to New York and no one has seen you since. Except…are you in Montana?”

  The question caught him off guard and Cyrus’s head
shot up. “Montana?”

  “There was a rumor,” Phillip said. “It was on some of the gossip sites. You know I have an alert set on your name, but I ignored them because why on earth would you be in Montana?”

  Why indeed? Once again, Cyrus looked at the log building that currently held his mate. He’d hoped that Gabe had been able to send those nosy reporters on their way, but obviously it had been a slow news day and they were hungry for a gossipy story. Perfect. He’d been hoping to keep his relationship with Natalia a secret for a bit longer. At least when it came to the rest of the world.

  “Where are you, Cyrus?”

  This time when Phillip asked, Cyrus answered.

  “Montana.”

  He could almost see his friend all the way in New York roll his eyes, straighten his spine, and take a deep breath. No doubt the poor man’s blood pressure was skyrocketing.

  “Do I need to ask why?”

  “You don’t need to,” Cyrus answered. “But I’ll tell you anyway.” He couldn’t keep the smile out of his voice when he answered. “I met a woman.”

  “Of course you did.” For the first time since they’d started their conversation, Cyrus heard a tone of lightness in his friend’s voice. Maybe if it had been anyone else, Phillip would have reacted differently, but he knew better than anyone that Cyrus didn’t take relationships lightly. He didn’t date just for the sake of dating, and he most certainly had never blown off an important business meeting for a woman before. “She must be pretty special.”

  “She is.”

  “I can’t wait to meet her.” Phillip’s business tone returned. “When you fly to New York tomorrow.”

  Cyrus didn’t hesitate. “It’s not happening, Phillip. Not tomorrow,” he continued before the other man could have a stroke. “But soon. I promise. Natalia has a very important family issue to attend to for the next little while, but I promise we’ll be on a plane as soon as we can. In the meantime, how about we set up a videoconference meeting? I can answer everyone’s questions and put their fears at ease and then next week, I promise, I’ll be there.”