His to Seek

by Elena Aitken

  He took another look at the building, and a curtain dropped back into place in one of the far windows, as if he were being watched. “You have my word,” Cyrus added and hoped like hell he hadn’t just lied again.

  Chapter Eleven

  “I don’t understand.” Natalia shook her head again. She’d been trying to process what her grandfather was telling her, but none of it made any sense.

  “There’s nothing to understand, Natalia.” Gordon Jackson had propped himself up in his bed so he no longer looked quite as frail as he had when Natalia had arrived. In fact, talking to her had brought color back into his face, and Nat was certain it had more to do with the subject matter than with the fact that it was her he was talking to. “You’re not a stupid girl. I didn’t think this would be a matter that would require explanation.”

  But it did! And the fact that he didn’t understand that was more concerning than anything else.

  “You want me to be the alpha of the Jackson clan?” Just saying the words out loud felt strange. She was the youngest grandchild, never mind the fact that she was the daughter of Gordon’s bastard daughter. There was nothing about her or her situation that made her a suitable candidate to be the head of the clan. And her grandfather didn’t even know about her new mate yet. Nat’s head spun.

  “That’s exactly what I’m saying. I’ve thought long and hard about it, Natalia. I assure you that I didn’t come to this decision lightly, but you are the natural choice. You always have been.”

  “No.” She shook her head. “Things are different now. You apologized to the boys.” It was true, sort of. Not that long ago, after almost causing Kade to lose Ella forever, Gordon had apologized. He’d come to the realization that his stubbornness had caused him to lose most of his family. But the Jackson brothers had never fully forgiven him, and obviously Gordon still had some lingering feelings about clan duty considering he’d sent Natalia’s own brothers to stop Axel and Harper’s wedding only a few months ago.

  “They’ll never forgive me,” he said. “And I don’t blame them.”

  “Do you forgive them?”

  “That’s not a fair question.”

  They sat for a moment, staring at each other. Finally, it was Nat who spoke.

  “What about Axel? He would—”

  “Never leave his ridge.”

  “Luke then. He’s the second oldest and—”

  “He’s not a leader.”

  Never mind the fact that he mated a brown bear.

  “Kade.” It had to be Kade. Out of all of her cousins, he’d liked Kade. They’d had a connection. “He’s a strong—”

  “He would have killed me,” he interrupted her. “Not that I blame him.” For the first time, her grandfather’s face softened, and he looked down at the blanket that covered his lap. “I betrayed him,” he said after a moment. “I threatened his mate. He should have killed me.”

  Nat flinched. When she’d heard the story of how their grandfather had almost killed Ella, it had hurt her heart to know he could do something like that. Especially after everything else they’d all been through.

  “But, you said you’d apologized,” she tried. “You aren’t that man anymore, right?” She looked deep into his eyes, wanting more than anything to see something she knew she could never see. For all the apologies her grandfather could make, he couldn’t change who he was at the core and he couldn’t turn back time. Even if he could, Nat knew that none of her cousins would want him to. Their life on Grizzly Ridge was as wonderful as it was because of the choices Gordon Jackson had made. No one would deny it.

  Or change it.

  “It has to be you, Natalia.” He nodded his head, as if that were the end of the discussion.

  But it was far from the end. How could she possibly take on such a responsibility?

  “Ryker?”

  Her grandfather scoffed. “I hear he mated a human.”

  She didn’t bother denying it.

  “I’m an old man,” Gordon said. “A very old man. And I’ve made mistakes along the way. Some of them I regret more than anything. But my duty has always been to my clan. I’m not going to pretend to understand the choices Ryker and your cousins made, but I’ve come to accept them because they are my grandchildren and I love them.” He held up a hand to stop her before she could speak. “I know they don’t believe that and I don’t blame them after everything I’ve done. I hope, in time, they’ll come to see it as the truth. My greatest regret is pushing all of you away.” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “I only wish I could make it up to everyone, but I fear I won’t live long enough to have their forgiveness.”

  Natalia’s heart ached for the man.

  “The Jackson clan is strong,” he continued. “And it will continue to remain strong with solid leadership. I’ve made my decision, Natalia. It must be you. There is no other choice. And before you mention Liam, don’t bother. That boy is not fit for leadership. Not right now.”

  She couldn’t argue with that. Liam had only very recently attacked Ryker. And ever since, had mostly kept to himself.

  Her mind reeled. Could she do it? Could she lead the clan? Did she want to? What would it mean? What about Cyrus?

  “Grandfather?” She stepped toward him and took his hand again. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

  With the plans made for a video call to happen the next morning, Cyrus made his way up to the log house. He knew it was only a stopgap measure. He couldn’t hide from his responsibilities forever. He was going to have to deal with the meetings, Steele Industries, and the never-ending task list that was no doubt growing by the minute. He was running on borrowed time and he knew it. They would check on Natalia’s grandfather, make sure he was doing okay, and then they’d be able to go to New York.

  Natalia would probably really enjoy the city. All the shows and the amazing restaurants. As far as big cities went, New York was a pretty good one. Had Nat ever been before? He had no idea. Cyrus shook his head as he made his way up the steps to the large covered porch. There was still so much he didn’t know about his mate. But he looked forward to getting to know every single thing.

  He’d spotted some large rocking chairs on the porch earlier and had only just sat down in one of them when a voice startled him. Immediately, Cyrus jumped up and turned to see a woman standing in the door to the house, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders to ward off the cold air.

  “You must be here with Natalia.”

  She was a striking woman with long, dark hair streaked with silver, and rich green eyes that he’d seen before.

  “Yes,” the woman said. “You’re here with Natalia.” She stepped closer to Cyrus and as she moved, her lips flicked up into the smallest of smiles. “You’re her mate.”

  Had Nat said something? He had no way to know what had happened after Natalia disappeared inside her grandfather’s house, but something told him that she hadn’t led with the fact that she was mated to a Kodiak.

  “Don’t deny it,” the woman said. “I can sense it.” Her smile was full blown by now. “My name is Kristine.” She extended her hand. “I’m Nat’s mother.”

  “Cyrus.” He took her hand. Relief washed through him that this woman wasn’t going to attack him, or call in reinforcements because he wasn’t welcome, which could have just as easily happened. “Cyrus Steele.”

  “I know who you are.” Her smile really lit up her face, and despite the obvious age difference, the more he looked at her, the more Cyrus could see the family resemblance. “Doesn’t everyone know who you are?”

  He laughed. “I certainly hope not. But it is very nice to meet you.”

  “I assume she’s in with her grandfather. It’s good that she came.” She waved to the rocking chair he’d just jumped out of. “Now, sit. I want to hear all about my baby girl’s mate.”

  He did as he was told and relented to the interrogation from Natalia’s mother that mostly consisted of questions about how they met, and his childhood. “So,�
� he said as soon as Kristine finished peppering him with questions. “Do I pass the test?”

  “We’ll see.” She narrowed her eyes, but the sly smile on her lips gave her away. “I’ll reserve judgment until I see you together.”

  “Fair enough.” He nodded and gestured to the house behind them. “She’s still inside?”

  “They have a lot to talk about.” Kristine’s smile fell and she looked straight ahead. “My father is dying.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Kristine shrugged. “He’s old. The years haven’t been kind. It’s time.” She looked to Cyrus. “Are you worried that he won’t like you?”

  It was a bold question, but not entirely unexpected. Cyrus shook his head and answered honestly. “Yes and no. Natalia likes me—that’s what matters.” It wasn’t everything, though, and he knew that. Family was important in bear clans. Very important. He didn’t know them very well yet, but he’d already seen the toll the estrangement had taken on Nat’s cousins. “I want her to be happy,” he added. “And for Nat, I know that happiness includes family.”

  She smiled and nodded slightly. “You’re a smart man.”

  They sat in silence for a few moments before Cyrus asked, “Will he approve? Because I’m a Kodiak?”

  Kristine shook her head. “I don’t know.” It was an honest answer, but it did nothing to soothe the worry that had been growing since they’d arrived. “He’s changed a lot over the last few months. He’s not so…what’s the word? Rigid. I think age has the power to soften a man. But there’s only one way to find out for sure.” She nodded her head toward the door that was still closed.

  Cyrus looked at the solid wooden door and then back to Natalia’s mother.

  “Go on.”

  “There’s nothing you can tell me that will change my mind, Natalia. I want you to take over as the head of the clan.”

  She shook her head and squeezed his hand tighter. “I don’t think that’s true.” She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “I’ve found a mate.”

  Gordon closed his eyes and Nat waited. It felt like forever, but finally they opened again and looked straight at her. “I know.”

  “You know?”

  “I sensed it.” He blinked slowly. “But I sense something else, too. He’s—”

  “A Kodiak,” she said quickly. “From Kodiak Island. His name is Cyrus Steele and he’s—”

  “I know who he is.” Her grandfather raised a hand to silence her.

  “You know he’s not a grizzly? That I mated outside of my lineage? And—”

  “I told you,” he interrupted her again. “I’ve made mistakes. I may be stubborn and hardheaded, but no one will ever accuse me of not learning from my mistakes. You’ve mated with a Kodiak. A very strong clan, the Steele clan.”

  She tried to smile, but she couldn’t help but feel there was more he needed to say. “If you already knew, what else do you sense?”

  His lips twitched up into a sad smile. He opened his mouth, but closed it again. “It doesn’t matter.” He laid his other hand over their clasped hands and smiled at Natalia. “It doesn’t change how I feel. I want you to lead the clan. It can only be you.”

  A flood of emotions slammed through her, and Natalia thought her legs might give out on her. Things were happening too fast. He wasn’t angry with her. He wasn’t going to banish her. He’d admitted being wrong about…everything. It didn’t seem possible. Her cousins would never believe any of it. They’d want to come and… Cyrus. Natalia spun around, her hands still clasped with her grandfather’s, to see her mate in the door of the room.

  At once, every fiber in her body wanted to go to him. The pull to her mate was intense and overwhelming. Her hands slipped free and she crossed the room to take Cyrus in her arms. “Thank you.” As soon as she was in his arms and he in hers, her nerves settled and she became grounded. Nat pulled as much strength from her mate as she could, and it didn’t take long for her head to clear and her thoughts to slow.

  “Well?” Her grandfather’s voice, only a moment ago weak and soft, boomed with a familiar strength. “Are you going to introduce me or not?”

  Natalia smiled against Cyrus’s chest before slipping from his arms and leading him toward Gordon Jackson’s bedside. “Grandfather, this is Cyrus Steele. My mate.”

  They shook and went through the pleasantries, as much as they were when you were dealing with an old, dying, grizzly alpha greeting his granddaughter’s strong, young, alpha Kodiak mate.

  “I’m glad I got the opportunity to meet you, sir.”

  “Before I died, you mean?”

  “Yes,” Cyrus answered boldly. “You mean a great deal to Natalia and therefore to me. I lost my father only a few months ago. I know how hard it can be.” He reached for her hand and squeezed it reassuringly as unexpected tears sprang to her eyes.

  She would not cry. She couldn’t. Her grandfather would admonish her if he saw tears or even the slightest trace of weakness. Especially because she was meant to be leader of the clan.

  Was she? Would she accept?

  The first step would be letting Cyrus know. After all, there was still a lot the two of them needed to work out when it came to their lives. This was definitely one of those things. Before she could change her mind, Nat blurted it out. “Grandfather has asked me to be leader of the Jackson clan.”

  The second the words were out of her mouth, it felt real for the first time. She watched Cyrus’s face closely, but before he even had a chance to react, a strong voice boomed behind them.

  “What?”

  Liam.

  Natalia turned to see her brother. His frame filled the door. He looked bigger than he had a few months ago. Stronger. Angrier.

  “Liam.” She stepped toward him but he ignored her and walked straight past her, without even a flicker of acknowledgment.

  “Did I hear that right?” he demanded of his grandfather. “You want her to lead the clan?”

  Even dying in his bed, weaker and smaller than Nat had ever seen him, Gordon Jackson was a formidable presence. But still, his youngest grandson towered over him. “I do.”

  A vein in Liam’s neck bulged, and Nat’s instincts kicked in. Liam had always been a bit on the wild side, a bit unpredictable. But in the last few years, that unpredictability had become downright dangerous. She feared that if she hadn’t have been there, he might have killed Ryker the day of Axel and Harper’s wedding. She saw that same now familiar rage in his eyes when he looked down at his grandfather.

  “I am the only one of your grandchildren who has remained loyal,” Liam growled. “The only one suitable to run this clan.” His hands flexed and twitched into fists by his side as he spoke. “You’re making a mistake, old man. And it’s not one I’m going to stand for.”

  She stepped forward and grabbed her brother’s arm. “Liam, I—”

  He spun and growled at her, his teeth bared.

  Before Natalia could react, Cyrus was between them. He had one hand on her as he pushed her behind him, placing his body between her and her brother. “No one bares their teeth to my mate.” Cyrus’s voice was tight and barely controlled.

  Liam was a big man. At six three, with thick, broad shoulders and an attitude that was almost larger than his muscles, he was a presence to be reckoned with. But he looked downright tiny next to Cyrus, who stood over him, blue eyes boring into Liam’s. He was outmatched and he knew it.

  He growled, low under his breath, and turned back to his grandfather. “This isn’t over.”

  “It is, Liam.”

  “We’ll see,” was all Liam muttered as he turned and stalked out of the room.

  After he left, Cyrus turned to face Nat. There was so much she needed to say, but in that moment she couldn’t seem to find even one word to say. To her surprise, she was shaking, but it wasn’t from fear.

  It was from anger. She looked at Cyrus. Did he really just do that? Shove her aside as if she couldn’t take care of herself? As if she were some weak woma
n who needed to be tended to?

  Hell no.

  She turned away from her mate and walked toward her grandfather’s bedside. She took his hand and looked straight into his dark eyes, clouded with age. “I’ll do it,” she said. “I’ll lead the clan.”

  Chapter Twelve

  “Nat. Talk to me.”

  They’d been back at Grizzly Ridge for an hour already and still Natalia had barely said more than a few words to Cyrus. The car ride back had been largely silent, with the exception of Cyrus asking questions that went mostly unanswered and his recounting of the meeting he’d had with her mother, Kristine.

  She was processing everything.

  At least that’s what he kept telling himself, despite the fact that he knew it was total bullshit.

  She was mad.

  And he didn’t need to be her mate to sense it.

  Natalia vibrated with her anger, and the more time that went by without her talking to him about it, Cyrus was pretty sure it was getting worse. But it was he who should be angry, shouldn’t he? After all, she’d accepted the clan leadership without so much as talking to him about it.

  How in the hell was she going to lead a grizzly clan in Montana when she would be at his side leading the Kodiak clan and running a business in Alaska?

  More than once the question was on his lips, but he was smart enough to swallow it back. Whatever it was she was mad about, it was enough to keep her teeth clenched and her gaze fixed solidly away from his.

  He’d wait.

  They had slipped up to their room in the Den without being spotted by any of Nat’s cousins, and she’d disappeared almost at once into the shower. He’d been hoping it would sort her out and clear her head, but when she appeared with only a towel wrapped around her beautiful, curvy body, her dark hair wet, dripping and hanging over her bare shoulders, she didn’t look any less pissed off.