Me & Joan (of Arc)
Page 7
ACT II
(Drum roll, single bright spot, and Lili's on again, revved up, as though coming in from an all night party)
LILI: YYYYO! How's that for a hero?! Boy oh boy, can I pick 'em. Wham, bam! The enemy got so scared they refused to fight her. So who's got the reddest face, the guy who's scared to fight this woman, or...the guy who needs this woman to save him?
Oooo, bad karma for the girl. Where's she gonna find a boyfriend? I mean, who ever heard a guy when you ask "what do you like?" say "oh, I really go for the hero type." Hah. Take it from me, they don't want a hero.
But who needs a boyfriend, anyway. I mean, a woman is stronger for not having one, right? Purer. More available to serve her fellow man. Right? In fact, I suspect the reason I keep smashing my relationships is because I'm intended for some...higher purpose.
(From out of the dark behind Lili, a skirmish between Joan and enemy soldiers begins)
But how will I ever get there? I mean, you could see the Total Terror of the senators vs. Anita Hill-baby– What if someone believes her! Crucify her! Quick. Promise her anything, just get her off the front page!
Ooo, men do not like to be laughed at. Course, women don't like to be laughed at either, but we're used to it. And they've buttoned our lip with the threat that if we laugh at their masculinity, they lose it. Well, maybe not lose it, but, it does noticeably...droop. And that can be catastrophic. So it creates a conspiracy of silence. We agree not to mention when they're weak and funny: "You're sooo strong, Baby; You're sooo smart" which, in turn, further subjugates us. Ooo – nasty little circle.
(Lili hasn't seen Joan surrounded – snarling soldiers swarm as though they'll tear her to bits, shove and mill and spin, piling onto Joan like she's a fumbled football then fling her into a dark cell. The soldiers run off)
But not Joan baby. Let some big mug make fun of her – Ka-Bam! Not that I'm hot on violence, but once in a while..."Straight to the moon, Alex." And Joan is soo famous. She has climbed her mountain. She is way out there, baby. And I. am. with her!
(Slam. Lights out. Lili's now in the dark with Joan. Only a few candles in cups scattered on the periphery)
Lili: (As she finds her way) Joan! What happened? What happened! Joan?
(Darkness. Joan is silent. Pause. Lili, terrified, but trying to hide it)
Lili: Are you all right? Joan...?
(Echoing laughter and jeers from outside their cell)
Lili: (Stiff upper lip) Just what I like. An enthusiastic crowd. (Calling after the noise) Later. Later! We'll do another set at eleven. (Listens to silence) Joan? (Pause) You all right? Not scared, are you? (Beat) Course I'm not scared, Lili. (Yelling) How about a little light in here! You got it wrong – overlooking the pool, I said! (Pause) She's the King's friend, you know. He'll be after her in two shakes. Right? (Pause) Right, Lili. (Pause) Please say something, Joan.
(She crawls close, sees Joan in the dark. They look at each other)
Joan: (Dead, distant) Why are you here.
Lili: Me? Oh...had the weekend off.
Joan: Go now.
Lili: What happened? I don't remember this part at all.
Joan: (Pause) There's nothing more I can do for you. Go.
Lili: (Angry) They got what they wanted, now you're dishwater?! (Near tears, scared) Please tell me.
Joan: (Pause) The king didn't want to fight.
Lili: He wouldn't...
Joan: “Negotiate” they all said. (Begins dully, but reliving the betrayal fires her more with each memory) And time bought the enemy more army. Why couldn't they trust me? Each guarding his little power. They were insane not to attack!
Lili: (Frightened) You attacked...alone?
Joan: Not completely alone.
Lili: But your plan was...
Joan: It's not my plan, it's God's!
Lili: Joan...
Joan: Why couldn't they see?!
Lili: (Waits till Joan is calm, then- ) If your voices told you to attack...
Joan: (Interrupting) You don't believe in my voices.
Lili: Who said?
Joan: You said they weren't real.
Lili: I've been wrong before.
(Joan looks at her, and then turns away)
Lili: I mean it might be a good time to...call them in. (Pause) Joan?
Joan: Leave. I want you to leave.
Lili: (About to cry) I can't.
Joan: Why not?
Lili: I don't know why. (Pause) It's not true you can't help me.
Joan: Leave!
Lili: Just help me...understand. Your voices told you to attack, and so you...
(Joan begins to weep)
Lili: Joan?
Joan: They didn't.
Lili: What?
Joan: They didn't tell me to attack.
Lili: You went...without your voices?
(Lili gasps, amazed, frightened at what it may mean. Joan is devastated)
Joan: You see? I can't help you! I'm out of the light.
(They hold, their eyes share pain. The cell door grinds open. A light shaft. Then the head of an elderly priest. Joan tries to rise to her knees)
Joan: (Hoarsely) Thank God, Father! Bless me, for I have sinned.
Father Felipe: Now, now child...
(Felipe enters. He cannot see or hear Lili)
Joan: Hear my confession, Father.
Felipe: In good time.
Joan: I want to go to mass.
Felipe: As soon as we determine the state of your soul.
Lili: What does he mean?
Joan: Please, Father. I'll do whatever you say.
Felipe: I know you will, dear child.
Joan: Just...please, take me out of here.
Felipe: Ah...I wish I could...
Joan: Take me to a church prison.
Felipe: You've made yourself political, Joan.
Joan: Please take me out of the dark, Father. Take me where I can see a piece of sky!
Felipe: Perhaps...
Joan: And please, dear dear Father, let me hear mass.
Felipe: Do you love God?
Joan: (Breaks down weeping) With all my heart and soul.
Felipe: You must consider your sins...
Joan: Yes.
Felipe: ...and put aside your arrogant behavior.
Joan: Yes! Will you hear my confession now?
Felipe: As soon as you return to us, my child...and put off these blasphemous clothes.
(Felipe leaves a bundle – Joan's red dress)
Joan: Father, I...
Felipe: (Seeing her hesitate, he's leaving) Consider your sins, Joan, that you may soon come into the light.
(Felipe exits. Joan remains immobile where she was, drops her head)
Lili: They let a priest come. That's better than soldiers. (Pause) Joan? (Pause) I mean, he just wants you to change into your dress.
Joan: I can't do that.
Lili: (Frightened) Of course you can! (Pause) You've got to make friends here. Figure it out.
Joan: I can't.
Lili: Why not?
Joan: My work isn't done. My country isn't free.
Lili: What does a skirt have to do with...?
Joan: I was told to dress as a soldier, and until my work is done...
Lili: You're in prison! You're not a soldier now.
Joan: I am! If I'm not a soldier, they can deny who I am, what I've done. If I put on this dress, they've erased me, they can forget – and even I might forget!
(Joan flings herself so violently down, that Lili is frightened into silence)
Lili: (Pause. Timidly) So, uh...what do you think they'll do to you?
Joan: (Like stone) It doesn't matter.
Lili: Because of being "out of the light?"
Joan: (Tightly. In pain) Yes. There's nothing worse.
L
ili: (Pause) I am too. Out, I mean. That's why I can't leave you.
Joan: If I knew I'd done what God wanted, nothing they do could hurt me.
Lili: I felt like that once. After a show...when I'd been flying so high...when everything I'd done was so...right, I wasn't even me, like I was part of everyone, part of God. I was so perfectly...happy, I could have died.
(Joan looks at Lili, gently surprised)
Lili: Please don't give up, Joan. I need you.
(Joan reaches to touch Lili's forehead. Lili melts, all her sorrow flowing toward Joan, who embraces her, and, with Lili's head on her breast, Joan rocks, comforting them both)
Lili: (After long quiet) Why do they want you in a dress?
Joan: (Still rocking) There are rules.
Lili: Why? Women aren't different from men.
Joan: (Startled, she laughs) Of course they are.
Lili: No!
Joan: You're afraid. So you confuse what's true with what's real.
Lili: What?
Joan: What's real...is that people think women are "less." What's true...is that women are different. And we fear anyone different.
Lili: Yes...
Joan: And evil comes from fear.
Lili: (Sighing, sensing what's coming) Oooh boy...
Joan: To love what's true...is to be fearless. And to have power.
Lili: (Little laugh) Power. And no evil?
Joan: No evil.
Lili: "To love what's true"... (Pause) Are soldiers afraid to let you lead them?
Joan: (Still holding Lili) When they see they need me, they accept it. But I have to prove they do – because I'm the one who knows it's true. In the man's world, a woman is his slave. Yet he has it harder than she does. In that world she's like a child, but he never is, all the responsibility is his.
Lili: That's not true.
Joan: I didn't say it was true. What's true is that they suffer the same. Because neither has their true soul.
Lili: (Gazing at Joan, moved) How could you be out of the light? You are light.
Joan: (Frightened again) Don't say that.
Lili: We've got to get you out of here. Have we got anything going for us? (Pause) Your voices. What's the last thing they told you?
(Joan looks at Lili, frightened, clouding up)
Lili: Well, what? You remember the last thing they said?
Joan: They told me...I'd be captured.
Lili: (Astonished) Then why were you fighting? Why didn't you stay away?!
(Joan takes a big breath, but folds, collapsing, now in full despair, beating herself)
Lili: Oh, Christ. I'm sorry. Please don't...oh, please... (Helpless) Here...come...let me hold you.
(To Lili's surprise, Joan curls up in her arms, sobbing. Lili rocks her, sings a little. Slowly Joan becomes still)
Lili: There now, there now, that's better.
Joan: I feel very strange.
Lili: No surprise. Here, let me look at your wound.
Joan: No, it's my...belly. (Beat) And my legs are wet.
Lili: You peed.
Joan: (Moving away) No.
Lili: Then you're bleeding. Is it your time of month?
Joan: No! I've never bled.
Lili: Really? Never a cramp? Here, let me see.
Joan: (Opening her pants to look) And I don't want... (Dismayed) Oooh!
Lili: Congratulations, kiddo. Welcome to womanhood.
Joan: (Panicking) They won't let me hear mass! I can't take communion!
(Lili is tearing up her underwear to make rags for Joan)
Lili: What a crock. Of course you can.
Joan: It’s a sign God has left me.
Lili: It's a sign this is one hell of a stressful day.
Joan: (Stonily) I've failed him.
Lili: (Staring at her) You crazy, flipped-out angel – celebrate! This is proof God loves you. Is this where the insanity about Mary comes from?! Give me a break.
Joan: (Her eyes wide) The Virgin Mary?
Lili: Virgin? Hah! Man-into-us is God's way to make life! What could be more sacred? Priests are the unclean ones, with their filthy minds. What did women ever do to them that they're so afraid of life?
Joan: You complained about being a wom...
Lili: Never said I wanted to be something else! Sure I yowl, but honey-chile, this blood says it's you and the gods, baby, you can make it happen.
(Lili's roused herself to giddy euphoria, now glances at Joan's bewildered amazement)
Lili: Tell you what – we need a little Christmas...(singing) “right this very minute, candles at the window, carols at the spinet, yes, we...”
(Lili prances, full routine. Joan can't resist her, finally laughs, and Lili joins her)
Lili: (Out of breath) Now, about boys...
Joan: