To Love A Friend

by Jana David

Darcy

  Allie and Ian showed up around six. They were laughing and holding hands when they walked in the door, both sporting flushed cheeks and tousled hair.

  “Hey, Darce, we brought some food. I thought we'd cook together and catch up, what do you think?”

  The way he glanced back and forth between Al and myself when he said 'catch up', made it very clear what he actually meant.

  I just nodded. “Sounds great.”

  Since the weather was still nice and warm, we decided to fire up the grill one last time before we put it away for the winter.

  Allie and Ian had bought steaks, and we found some vegetables In the fridge to go with it. After we got the grill started, Ian not-so-subtly shooed me away from the food and gestured towards Allie,who was inside, setting the table.

  “Go talk”, he said, clicking the tongs he was holding in front of my face.

  His bossy attitude was really getting to me, but I didn't let it show. If he thought Allie and I needed to talk, then we'd talk. But not about how much we hated each other.

  “Hey.” I stepped inside, closing the door behind me. I told myself it was so that the smoke wouldn't waft into the house, but truthfully, it was mainly because I didn't want Ian to overhear our conversation.

  “Hey.”

  I wondered briefly, if all our conversations were going to be this awkward from now on.

  “Did Ian send you in here?” Allie asked, placing the last fork on the table.

  “Well, he seems to think you and I should have a 'talk'.”

  “I know. He told me as much this afternoon.”

  “So...”

  “So?”

  “Listen,”, I said, “we don't need to make this weird or awkward. I don't—I mean, I'm not mad at you or hate you or anything like that...even though that's what Ian seems to think.”

  “I know”, she simply said. “But I wouldn't blame you if you did.”

  I was so surprised, it left me speechless for a moment.

  Allie gave me a sad smile. “I know you, Darce. Even after all these years, and I know that when you hate someone, you aren't afraid to show it. So since you've been nothing but nice to me so far, I'd assume you don't hate me.” She looked at me, as if waiting for me to contradict her. I didn't. She was right, I could never hate her.

  “I do feel like I owe you an explanation, though”, she went on, “for why I—why I left without saying a single word to either of you. It wasn't fair, and I know that. I knew it then, too, but I did it anyway.”

  “You don't have to explain”, I cut in, seeing how hard she seemed to struggle with herself. Whatever it was that had her so torn up inside, I didn't need to hear it—didn't want to hear it—if it caused her pain like that.

  But Allie shook her head, taking a step towards me. “No, please, I have to at least try to explain what was going on at the time. Although I can't promise you it'll make sense.” She let out a little sad laugh, and looked up at me. I'm sure you know why my family left the city five years ago”, she said.

  I nodded. Of course I knew. The Wright family was forced to leave, because people were self-observed arseholes, that was why. Gossiping about others behind their backs, whispering to each other while walking past the house. Those were just some examples.

  They'd done the same thing when my parents got a divorce three years ago, but apparently, having a husband who cheated on you was still more acceptable than having a wife with mental problems.

  “Well, my father was offered the job in Brighton, and they wanted him to start as soon as he could. It came as a surprise, really, but it was a blessing for our family. Dad told me about a week before he was due to start. I wanted to tell you. I did, but every time I tried, there was just something else happening, and it never seemed like the right time, and in the end it was just easier to simply leave without a goodbye. I know that's no excuse, and I do feel like a lousy human being for treating you this way. I, out of all people, should know how it feels when someone just disappears without a word.” She lifted her head and her eyes met mine. “I guess being messed up runs in the family.”

  Without even thinking about it, I stepped forward and took her into my arms. “Don't say that. Don't—“ I searched for the right thing to say. Allie was anything but messed up. “Let's just start over”, I finally said. “Think we can do that?”

  “I'm just so sorry I treated you like this”, Al said. She sounded close to tears.

  She held onto me for a while, as I was gently rocking us back and forth like we were sitting in a rocking chair.

  “Think we can just start over, Al?”

  She let go of of me, but didn't step away. “I don't know, but I'd be willing to try.” A small smile appeared on her lips, and I wanted to capture it and never let it go.

  “One last thing, though”, I said. “Why didn't you ever try to get in contact with me after you ran into Ian?”

  She looked at me, a guilty expression on her face. “I was scared”, she admitted. “I was scared you really would hate me.”

  “I could never hate you, Al, even if I tried.” I hoped she knew that I meant it.

  She took a deep breath. “Alright, enough of this. When is the food going to be ready? I'm starving.”

  I smiled. “I'll go and ask the head chef”, I said.

  Chapter 3