by Danica Flynn
I pulled my hair up into a bun so I could focus and shoved my headset on my head. The video game soundtrack I was listening to was going to get me through this. My fingers flew across the keyboard and I got into the zone working on a new chapter. I felt confident and good about it, but it might be a different story in the morning when I re-read what I had written.
“Hey, you there?” I heard Noah’s voice behind me and I nearly jumped out of my seat.
I yanked my headset off my head, and saw he was standing in the doorway of my office. His long and lean body was leaning up against the doorway and it made him look so sexy. God, what was wrong with me? I put a hand on my heart. He smiled at me sheepishly.
“You scared me!” I chastised him.
He crossed the room and put his hands on my shoulders. “You did tell me to give you a half-hour but I gave you forty minutes.”
I reached up a hand to my shoulder to rest on one of his. His hand felt warm and sent a shockwave of pleasure down my spine. I didn’t know if it was just hormones or if it was just my feelings for this man seeping out. “Thanks, I think I needed the extra ten minutes,” I thanked him.
“I know you have a real job, so you should get to bed,” he insisted.
I couldn’t focus on the actual words coming out of his mouth right now though, because his big hands were rubbing the tension out of my shoulders. He was a little too good at relaxing me, and he was really good at shoulder rubs. I saved my place and closed the lid to my laptop.
Noah continued to rub my shoulders. “Mmmhmm...you’re good at that, thanks,” I told him.
“Come on, come to bed, it’s late,” he urged and pulled his hands away from me.
I took his hand and he led me to my bedroom. Even though he saw me naked last night, I felt awkward changing into my pajamas in front of him. It was like exposing myself to him, but it wasn’t like this man didn’t know everything about me. He must have felt my self-conscious thoughts, because he distracted me by slipping his shirt over his head and taking off his jeans. I tried not to stare at the hard planes of tight muscle on his body, but damn Noah hid how built he was until you got him naked. I really didn’t want to think about all the other girls who may have gotten to look at this view right now. A stab of jealousy hit me in the chest when I looked at him, because I wanted to be the only woman who got to see him like that.
Whoa. Calm down, Dinah.
He joined me in my bathroom, where I handed him the extra toothbrush I had underneath the sink. We joked while we brushed our teeth and I washed my face. It was all so weirdly domestic. I mean, he was going to stay over again tonight and he wasn’t even pressuring me to get naked again.
Why wasn’t he pressuring me to get naked with him again?
I wanted to put my mouth all over him right now and ride his cock until he couldn’t handle it anymore. I sighed to myself, because he was the kindest and most decent man I had ever met. EVER. I swear, I built this gentle giant in a factory.
I slid into the bed and he pulled me close to him, my head lying on his chest and his big arm around me. I felt my eyes starting to close while his finger stoked up and down my arm.
“D?” he whispered into the quiet of my bedroom.
“Yeah?”
“What’s your day like tomorrow?” he asked.
My brow furrowed in confusion as I thought about what my schedule was like. I honestly couldn’t even remember. I pulled away from him to grab my phone off the nightstand and I scrolled through my work calendar. “Um...pretty okay. I have a meeting at three, but otherwise it’s open. Why?”
I wasn’t looking at him when I double checked that my phone was plugged in and my alarm was set for the morning. I set it back on the nightstand, and when I crawled back over to place my head against Noah’s heart he looked like he was thinking a little too hard. His hand absent-mindedly stroked my hair. It took all my composure not to moan at that, because seriously getting my hair stroked while a man I had feelings for held me in his arms was such an intimate gesture.
“You have lunch plans?” he finally asked.
I racked my brain for an answer. “I don’t think so...”
“Can I take you to lunch?” he asked, and I noticed a nervous hitch in his voice. God, he was adorable.
“Sure...wait, don’t you have practice?”
He shook his head slowly. “Nope! Let me take you to lunch tomorrow.”
I was nodding, but mostly because his stroking of my hair was hypnotizing me into agreeing with anything he said. He could have told me to get on my knees and take off my clothes and I would have done it. Not that Noah would have done that right now. Although, I wouldn’t have minded it.
“Okay, sure,” I agreed.
He kissed the top of my head gently. “Come on, let’s get some sleep.”
I let sleep take me, curled up into the side of the first man to sleep in my bed since my husband died. The man that I used to call my best friend, but I wasn’t sure what he was to me now that we crossed that line.
10
NOAH
She was asleep within minutes, and it made me want to just shake her awake and say, “HA! I knew you were lying about not being a good sleeper.” But she looked so cute asleep in my arms, with her head lying on my chest and her arms clutching onto me. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I wasn’t sure what was going on with us right now, but I thought it was good enough that I told her how I felt and left the puck on her stick. Now she had to decide if she wanted to take the shot.
I mean, what could a woman like her want with a dumb jock like me? There was no way that Dinah had feelings for me, and I couldn’t help but wonder if the other night was just sex. I was just her young neighbor who she happened to be best friends with. I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to sleep with her tonight. I was a man after all, but I didn’t want her to think I was just some horny bastard out for sex and nothing more. With Dinah, I wanted all the mores and I wanted her to know that. I wasn’t sure if my lame explanation tonight had even gotten through to her.
I heard my phone buzz on the bedside table and I glanced at it to see a text from TJ. I shifted slightly in the bed, afraid to wake the small woman curled into my side.
TJ: It’s safe to come back now, Taylor left.
ME: K.
TJ: K??
TJ: Do you even live here anymore?
ME: It’s been two nights! Why are you obsessed with me, bro?
TJ: Kens...don’t make this weird with D or she’ll never hang out with us again.
ME: I’m not.
TJ: Sure...
I set my phone down and stared up at the ceiling waiting for sleep to take hold. The sound of Dinah’s breathing eventually lulled me to sleep too.
I slipped out in the morning while she was getting ready for work with a quick wave. “I’ll see you later, okay?” I said to her.
She nodded while she blow-dried her hair. “Is noon okay for you?” she yelled over the noise.
I nodded and slipped out of her condo to go next door to my own place. I was surprised to see TJ was already up, and he was in gym clothes. Even though we had a day off, it didn’t mean we gave our bodies a break. Especially when we really needed to figure out if we could make it to the playoffs this season.
He smirked at me. “Do you need to come with me to the gym today, or did you get a good enough workout last night?”
I sighed. “Um...no.”
“What do you mean no?”
“We just talked and fell asleep,” I explained.
TJ was a casual hookup guy. Taylor was actually the first girl I had seen him hookup with for longer than a couple of weeks. I liked her, she was a sweet girl, but I think she was trying to see if she could change him. I loved the guy like a brother, but when it came to women we were just very different. I was a serial monogamist, happier to be in a relationship and he was happier to just never call women back. I don’t think he understood that talking with Dinah and trying to lay out
my feelings was more important to me than trying to get her naked again. I kind of felt bad for Taylor, she was a nice girl and she deserved happiness, but I didn’t think she would find it with TJ. I guess that made me a bad friend, but I just didn’t think he was the kind of guy into that.
“Wait, so you didn’t sleep together?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.
I felt the blush color my pale face. “We did...just not last night.”
His face was still scrunched up in confusion and then he just shook his head. “Man, I will never understand you.”
“You going to hit the gym?” I asked, changing the subject so I didn’t have to explain to TJ what it was like to actually have feelings for a woman other than wanting to sleep with her.
“Yeah, no practice today, but like we are kind of fucked this season,” TJ explained with a grimace.
“Wait for me to change? I have some time for a workout this morning.”
I didn’t wait for his answer, but went into my room to change out of my clothes from the night before and into gym clothes. I changed into gym shorts and a red Bulldogs t-shirt. TJ was waiting for me at the kitchen counter, grabbing our water bottles and checking his watch. He looked up at the sound of my footsteps.
“Come on, let’s go lift some weights and you can tell me all about what’s going on with you and Dinah.”
I sighed, but followed him out of our condo. He drove in his car to the gym and peppered me with questions about how the sex was with Dinah. I was not a kiss and tell guy, and there was no way I was going to describe it to him. That was between the two of us, and no one else needed to know about it. I was sure Dinah wouldn’t appreciate me talking in vivid detail with the boys about the night we spent together. It wasn’t their business.
At the gym, I spotted TJ while he used the bench press and gave him a taste of his own medicine. “So what’s up with you and Taylor?” I asked.
He glanced up at me in annoyance, the sweat beading on his forehead while he grunted and lifted the bar above his head. “We’re just hanging out,” he offered.
“Uh huh.”
“It’s just casual.”
“Does she understand that?”
He set the bar back down on the rack and stood up. He wiped down the bench and we swapped positions so now I was raising the bar above my head. “She knows what I’m about,” he argued.
“Okay...”
He glared down at me. “What does that mean?”
“Listen, man, Taylor’s a nice girl.”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “What are you saying?”
I sighed and grunted while I did a couple more sets. “She might say she’s okay with the casual stuff, but in my experience that always leads to feelings.”
“Yeah, I’m kind of worried about that,” he admitted with a frown.
“T, you know it’s okay to have feelings and to want a partner, right?”
He shook my head. “Nah, that’s not me, man.”
I rolled my eyes at him. He was hopeless. I got the feeling that something had to have happened for TJ to be so anti-relationship. The last time his twin had visited, she had mentioned some girl named Natalie they knew from back home in St. Catharines. I swear I saw him flinch at the sound of her name. When I asked him who Natalie was later he just shrugged and said, “Some girl from high school.” I had to remind myself to ask Rox what the story was.
I finished my set and wiped down the bench. TJ went to go run on the treadmill and I opted for the bike. I put my headphones on and saw a text from Dinah.
DINAH: Hey...can we make it one instead? I just got a meeting added to my schedule today last minute at noon.
ME: Sure! Anywhere close to your office you want to go?
I pumped my legs into circles on the bike and waited for the three dots to finish while she typed her reply.
DINAH: Let me think about it. The sandwich shop a block up is pretty good.
ME: Sounds good to me. See you later.
DINAH: Can’t wait!
I smiled at that and I didn’t care if it made me seem like that weird guy in the gym. If I got to see Dinah and our relationship was moving to where I wanted it to be, I would be the weird guy in the gym. I finished my workout and met up with TJ so we could head back to our place together. He had finished before me and took a shower at the gym, but I wanted to shower in my own bathroom. I took a quick shower and examined my face in the mirror holding up my razor in my hand. I scratched a hand across my jaw, where scruff was starting to appear already. Having been friends with Dinah for so long, I knew the type of guys she liked. Especially when we were the type of friends that got drunk together and teased each other about our “types.” Dinah liked a bearded man, and I knew she liked the hockey flow look. Hence why I kept my hair on the longish side, even though my mom hated it. The amount of “get a haircut” texts that came through from my mom after games could fill a book.
I put the razor back into the medicine cabinet and combed out my hair. I shook my head and let it air dry and walked out of the bathroom. With my towel wrapped around my waist, I peered into my closet. What do you wear to a lunch date? I mean, it was just lunch. The part of me that was still trying to win over this woman’s heart wanted to impress her. So I called Rox.
“You do know that other people have day jobs they have to be at?” she asked in way of greeting.
I stifled a laugh. “You didn’t have to answer, you know.”
“What’s going on?” she asked.
“Um...so weird question, what do you wear to a lunch date? Or if you’re not sure if it’s actually a date but you asked if you could meet a woman on her lunch break?”
She barked out the loud laugh that she would kill me if I told her sounded exactly like her brother’s. “Oh my god, Noah! Are you and Dinah finally a thing?”
Rox had visited a few times since I moved in with her twin, so of course she knew Dinah. She was actually the first person to call me on my bullshit about how I was in love with the older woman.
“Um...not exactly. I don’t know?”
“What do you mean, you don’t know?”
I dragged my hand through my hair and walked across my bedroom to my dresser to at least put on a pair of boxers. I felt a little odd talking to Rox when I was naked. I sighed. “Um, it’s complicated, but I basically told her how I felt and left it up to her.”
“Oh my god! You so went to Bone Town!” she squealed.
“Ugh, will you and your brother stop saying that?” I groaned.
She laughed some more. “Oh my god! Noah!”
“ROXANNE!” I yelled back at her sarcastically.
“Boo! Give me details!” she demanded.
I opened my closet door and surveyed a plain light blue button-down that might be okay. “Nope! You know I don’t kiss and tell.”
I could practically see her pout through the phone. “It’s just Dinah, okay? You don’t have to impress her. She already tolerates your existence,” she assured me.
“Wow, thank you for the vote of confidence.”
“No, seriously! I don’t know what’s in her head, but I think things will work out between you two. I mean, shit, you both have been too busy eye-fucking each other to notice.”
“What?”
She cackled on the other line again. “Oh, Noah, I love you, but sometimes you can be a bit thick. Just wear like a nice pair of jeans and maybe one of your button-downs.”
I pulled the shirt I was eyeing out of my closet and laid it on my bed. “Thanks, Rox. You’re the best.”
“Ha! Sure.”
There was something odd in the tone of her voice. “You okay?”
“I’m good. You’ll have to remind me when you guys are next playing Toronto and I’ll try to come meet you. Tristan always forgets.”
By Tristan, she meant TJ. She was the only one who called him by his first name.
I smiled. “Okay, but you are not allowed to fight with Benny again, okay?”
&nbs
p; She scoffed. “Ugh, Michael fucking Bennett can get bent. On that cheery note, I have to get back to work. Good luck!”
I hung up with her and got dressed. I thought I looked okay, and I really hoped that Dinah was as nervous as I was. Even though it was just lunch with a friend. But it was with a friend I had a thing for and whose kisses I couldn’t stop thinking about.
11
DINAH
I clicked my pen furiously as my boss Stacey droned on and on about new media buying strategies. We had this last minute Media Team meeting added to the schedule this morning and I was freaking livid about it. Who schedules a meeting over lunch time? Also this meeting so could have been an email, instead it was just another colossal waste of time. It’s like the company just thrived on having meetings for the sake of having meetings. Thank the Hockey Gods that Noah had a flexible schedule today.
Matt sat next to me and kicked my foot to get me to stop, to which I just flicked his Dire Wolf tattoo on his forearm in retaliation. Since Jason had died, Matt and I had grown close, but not close like Noah and I. Between Matt and I, it was strictly platonic, plus the whole working together thing had always turned me off to men. I was there to work, not find a husband!
We shared an annoyed look while Stacey droned on some more. Seriously, the mundaneness of all the bullshit meetings I had on a daily basis was starting to get to me. This whole job itself was starting to get to me. Each day I woke up with the alarming fear that this was what I was going to be doing for the rest of my life. I freaking hated it. I wanted nothing more than to quit and write full-time, but I just didn’t have that luxury. Even writers that did that, usually had a support system to fall back on, or they were supported by a partner. I didn’t have either of those.
I felt my phone buzz in my pocket, and I stealthily looked at it from below the table.
NOAH: Hey...I’m kind of early. Waiting in the lobby now.
CRAP!
ME: Sorry, hopefully almost done. Stuck in this meeting.
NOAH: No worries. I’ll be here.