How to Speak Boy

by Tiana Smith

  “I mean exchanging digits or letting each other know who you are. Though cursive would be a nice touch, I won’t lie. Or maybe you can go old school and spritz some perfume on the paper or something.”

  “The only perfume in my apartment is my mom’s,” I said.

  “Well, that’d just be wrong.”

  “Oh, come on.” I nudged her shoulder. “You don’t think he’d like old lady perfume?”

  “I dare you to try it.”

  “I’ll let you do the honors the next time you’re at my place.” I laughed. “Then I can tell him it was all your idea.”

  “Won’t I see you tonight? I thought we were doing pizza and stalking some bands on Instagram.”

  With everything else that had been going on, I’d completely forgotten about our plans.

  “Right. Six o’clock? Oh, and I can show you everything I’ve put together for my mom’s site so far. It’s got a rotating banner and everything.”

  “Well, look at you go.” Her smile stretched across her face. “I can’t wait. I feel like we haven’t had a chance to hang out and talk lately.”

  “That’s because I have nothing worth talking about,” I said, pushing her out the doorway. “Unless you want to go over my oh-so-amazing speech tournament where I tanked so spectacularly I now need to write something on an entirely new topic.”

  Not to mention, my own mother hadn’t really loved my topic all that much. When I’d presented it to her, her lips had scrunched to the side and she’d said, So glad to know I make your life miserable. Guess I’m doing my job right. Apparently my humor kept coming across the wrong way, and I needed to work on that.

  “Right, right,” Naomi said. “Always with the speech and debate. You need to get yourself a boyfriend already.”

  “Speak for yourself,” I countered.

  “I have.”

  I stopped short in the hallway and turned to face her. “And you didn’t tell me?” I asked, disbelief coloring my tone.

  She smiled slyly. “I wanted to make sure we were official before I said anything.”

  “Who? How?” I asked. Students passed me on either side and one of them bumped into me. I barely noticed. Naomi hooked her arm through mine and walked me toward the stairs.

  “Remember two weeks ago when Dax asked me to the fall fling?”

  I nodded and allowed myself to be pulled along in a daze. Dax was sporty like Naomi. They made sense together. Except for one thing.

  “He’s shorter than you,” I said, the realization causing me to speak without thinking.

  Naomi shrugged. “If I only dated guys who were taller than me, I’d be limited to Grant Benson or McKay Williams.”

  We’d made it to the stairs and Naomi dropped my arm.

  “You’ll tell me all about it tonight?” I asked, only going up a step.

  “I promise. I even promise to listen to as much 5 Seconds of Summer as you want.” That was the only band we disagreed about. She was completely wrong, by the way.

  “You should be so lucky,” I said, playfully shoving her shoulder.

  We waved, then went our separate ways.

  The speech room was busy, with everyone passing around score sheets from the previous meet. Mine were safely stored away in my locker, where they’d never get to see the light of day ever again. I’d gone over them on the bus ride home, and I’d spent my time since then trying to figure out where the nearest shredder was.

  Coach Bates waved me over.

  “Could you help Linley with her blocking?” she asked. I nodded and made my way there.

  That’s what I did for the rest of practice. And I gave it 110 percent so that no one would claim I didn’t deserve to be co–team captain.

  When I wasn’t busy with the JV team, I worked on memorizing my own speech. I had a week to do it, so time was tight. I was desperate enough that I even let Grayson help me. If he could pretend to be friendly with me just so he could crush me in the competition, then I could use him too for practice.

  He held my notecards so I couldn’t rely on them, and prompted me when I got lost. He cracked a joke about being “lost at sea” because I was talking about whales and I couldn’t help but snort. That was what we were doing in the back of the classroom when Coach stood up at the front and clapped her hands for everyone’s attention.

  “They had to cancel the Twin Falls High tournament,” she said to a chorus of boos and the occasional cheer. As for myself, my shoulders felt lighter already. The Twin Falls meet was the one in a week. That meant I had almost an entire month to polish up my performance before competing again. That was completely doable, even with everything else going on. I could get my grades up, spend more time with Naomi, and not let this fall to the side.

  “They couldn’t get enough food sponsors, so even though the state tournament is still months away, I want to make sure we’re on top of things since we’re hosting it. Grayson and Quinn, have you two worked out any preliminary details?”

  I chewed my lower lip. When I looked at Grayson, it was obvious this was a surprise to him too. With our own tournament being so late in the school year, I hadn’t even considered finding sponsors this early.

  Coach Bates shook her head. “Well then, put it on your agendas please. It’s state, so it needs to run smoothly. We’ll need enough food to feed all the volunteer judges lunch for two days, plus the coaches in the tabulation room.”

  I hastily nodded, and next to me, I felt Grayson do the same. Of course we’d have things organized by the state tournament, but that didn’t mean it was on our radar now.

  Coach kept talking about what to expect at the next meet, and I tuned her out. Grayson leaned over to whisper in my ear.

  “So the Twin Falls tournament was canceled.” His breath tickled my skin and I rubbed the goose bumps on my arms.

  “Looks like it,” I murmured, hoping Coach wouldn’t catch us talking.

  “You know what that means, right?”

  I furrowed my brow. “That the meet was canceled, I’m guessing.” This meant, in addition to working on the whale speech, I’d also have time to start something new. Something real for the following tournament.

  Grayson smiled like I was missing the point. “The meet was scheduled at the same time as the fall fling. We can all go. Problem is, everyone has dates but the people who were planning on going to the speech meet.”

  My breath caught, the realization sinking in. I looked around the room, mentally calculating my options. There weren’t many. Maybe I wouldn’t go. I could claim to be busy. Except, everyone would know that was a lie since I’d been free for the tournament, which was now canceled.

  Would Carter be willing to go as just friends? Whether I liked it or not, he was probably my best bet, so I started brainstorming ways to bring it up with him.

  “We should go together,” Grayson whispered.

  My head whipped around to face him.

  “What?” I asked the question more loudly than I was intending. My voice echoed around the room and Grayson’s eyes got wide.

  Everyone looked at me, including Coach Bates.

  “I didn’t think my remarks on bus etiquette were that surprising,” Coach said. I scrambled through my memory to think of what she’d been saying. Something about bus etiquette, apparently.

  “But we can’t listen to music?” I asked, latching on to the one thing my subconscious could remember.

  “Not through speakers, Quinn. But personal headphones are completely fine.”

  “Oh,” I mumbled. Heat rushed to my cheeks and I zipped my hoodie up and down. “I guess that’s okay, then. Thanks.”

  Everyone turned away from me then, except Grayson, who was obviously trying to hide the fact that he was laughing behind his hand. At least he found this situation funny. Because there were a lot of other things he could have felt about my outburst. Maybe laughing was his coping mechanism. I knew I was struggling to cope with what was happening.

  What. Was. Happening?

>   Had Grayson just asked me to the fall fling? He had. I was 90 percent sure of it. He’d probably only asked because he was limited to the people in this room. So it wasn’t like I should feel flattered. Was this a sign that Carter was right, and Grayson really was trying to do the same thing to me that he’d done last year to Zara to be class president? I really couldn’t trust him. But did that mean I couldn’t play at his game?

  Okay, so one, I could go with Grayson to the fall fling. Two, I could go with Carter, which could give him the wrong idea. Three, I could maybe ask 15211 if he already had a date, but hello, that was desperate. Because asking him would mean letting him in on the fact that I wasn’t exactly popular and didn’t have a date yet.

  No matter what, it wasn’t like I had a whole lot of time to think things through.

  “Don’t read too much into it,” Grayson whispered. “You know what they say. Keep your friends close…”

  “And your enemies closer,” I finished, holding out my hand for him to shake. Luckily for me, it was steady, even though I had no idea what I was doing.

  He took my hand in his. It was warm, and for some bizarre reason, it made my pulse pick up speed.

  “I’ll pick you up at five for dinner,” he said.

  I nodded.

  I was going to the fall fling with Grayson, and that was that.

  Chapter Ten

  It was weird how knowing I’d be going to the dance with Grayson made it so we completely avoided each other for the whole week leading up to it. He was at practice of course, and we nodded to each other from across the room. But I was always careful to make the bus on time and I felt too unsure to go up and say anything.

  Had he only asked me because of limited options? Because he was setting me up for failure later? It wasn’t clear. So we circled around each other like the loading/refresh loop on my phone that continuously circled without ever going anywhere.

  There wasn’t speech practice on the day of the dance, so I went home to be ready by five o’clock. Thankfully, Naomi was really good at updos, so I was letting her take the reins on that one. When she’d heard Grayson had asked me, she’d insisted we get ready together. It was easier to agree than to argue, so I’d caved under the pressure.

  My mom knocked on the door, then opened it as Naomi finished spraying practically an entire can of hairspray around my head.

  “How’re things coming?” She had to speak loudly to be heard over the music, so I turned it down.

  My mom had traded work shifts in order to take pictures for us. She was all smiles as she leaned on the doorframe. Her brown hair was tied back in a bun like usual, but she wasn’t wearing her work uniform. I’d almost forgotten she had other clothes. It reminded me why I wanted her photography business to take off. That was her real passion, and she deserved happiness.

  I turned from the mirror so she could see the final result. Her eyes crinkled at the edges as she smiled.

  “You look so beautiful, Quinn.”

  Naomi showed me off with her hands in a grand “ta-da” motion. “Her hair is so thick! I had to use like thirty bobby pins.”

  We both looked good. In contrast to my pinned-back look, Naomi’s hair was wild and free, her curls like a black halo around her head. It was my favorite look of hers.

  “You’re both so grown-up,” my mom said. Which was proof that parents can’t help but say embarrassing things around their kids’ friends. “I want a few pictures of just you two before your dates come.”

  I put a hand over my stomach as we walked to the front room, but it did nothing to calm my nerves. My lips felt dry, and while I wanted to blame the lipstick for that, I knew better. The fact was, I’d be spending the next hour or so alone with Grayson, and that caused my head and heart to do funny things lately. They were currently in a cage match, and it was anyone’s guess who’d win.

  Naomi’s date was vegan, so we were meeting up at the dance. Vegan was all well and good, but I personally wanted something more substantial. After all, I didn’t want to face tonight on an empty stomach. Even the pictures my mom wanted were enough to make me anxious.

  There wasn’t really a good picture spot in our apartment, so we went outside to use the black brick as a backdrop. That was where we were when Naomi’s date showed up. Dax drove a dark gray truck that looked freshly cleaned. For some reason, that only made me more nervous. Like this dance was more important than I’d realized. It was just the fall fling. It wasn’t homecoming or prom. People went with friends all the time, and asking someone as a date didn’t mean much.

  That’s what I told myself. So why did it feel like tonight was some kind of tipping point?

  I shouldn’t like Grayson. I didn’t. I was pretty sure. But it seemed like my heart rate picked up anytime he was in the room, and the reasons behind that were getting fuzzy. He never sugarcoated things around me, which I liked, but how real could a guy be when everyone said he used people to get what he wanted? He had an annoying habit of getting in my way and derailing my plans, showing up with his too-good looks and too-smug grin. He knew exactly how to push my buttons and get a reaction out of me, making me all flustered because I never knew how to react.

  No matter what Naomi said, that wasn’t attraction. That was a thorn in my side.

  Dax hopped out of his truck and walked to where we were standing. He whistled at Naomi, who twirled her skirt and acted bashful, even though we all knew she was anything but.

  “Naomi’s parents will never forgive me if I don’t get some pictures of you two,” my mom said, motioning for Dax to join Naomi by the brick wall. I stepped out of the frame and joined my mom.

  Because I didn’t know Dax well, it was still weird to see them as a couple. But they certainly acted like it. Dax kissed her cheek, and Naomi giggled in response. At our girls’ night the other night, Naomi couldn’t stop blushing as she’d told me all about how Dax had admitted he wanted to be more than friends and how awkward he’d been. I’d hardly seen her since they’d become official, but that was the way things were sometimes. If she was happy, that’s what mattered.

  “Okay, enough with the PDA,” I said when my mom had finished taking pictures. “You two go on already; you’re making me sick.” Naomi was used to my sense of humor, but it was only after I saw Dax’s stricken expression that I worried he’d taken me literally. “No, no, you’re fine,” I hurried to explain. “I’m kidding.”

  Naomi bounced over to me. “Of course you were kidding. Because soon your own boy will get here and you’ll be doing your own PDA.”

  I shushed her, like that would somehow erase her comments, or the way my mom’s eyebrows rose into her hairline.

  “She’s joking,” I told my mom, waving my hands in the air. “I’m not with Grayson. We’re just friends.” Friends was such a weird thing to call whatever we were, but it was better than whatever my mom was thinking. Competitors-trying-to-get-the-upper-hand didn’t have a great ring to it.

  Naomi laughed, slinging an arm over my shoulders. “Okay, yes, but, Ms. Edwards—sorry, I mean Lindsey—they’d totally make a cute couple if Quinn would just take her head out of her butt.” Even though my mom always preferred people calling her by her first name, my friends still slipped up.

  My mom’s face relaxed and she handed her camera over to Naomi so she could look at the pictures. “I’m sure they would. Quinn could use some more fun in her life.”

  “Traitor!” I gasped at my mom, who was supposed to be the one person in the world who never wanted to see me date.

  Of course, that was when Grayson pulled up in his car. So when he stepped out and asked what we were all talking about, everyone burst into laughter.

  Everyone but me.

  I was too busy trying not to ogle Grayson in his button-up shirt and dress pants. Everything about his outfit was perfectly tailored and too flattering for his own good. Or mine. His dark hair was ruffled the same way it was for speech tournaments—like he woke up looking that casually sophisticated and did
n’t even have to try. He was like a model who’d escaped the runway to stroll casually into my life. How come he had to be so attractive? Life wasn’t fair.

  “Mom, this is Grayson, Grayson, this is my mom,” I said when he’d walked up to us.

  “Nice to meet you, Ms. Edwards,” Grayson said politely, extending his hand.

  “Please, call me Lindsey.”

  I could already tell my mom liked him. She didn’t just shake his hand; she practically cradled it in hers like a caress. So that wasn’t embarrassing at all. I put my hand on her arm, signaling that bonding time was officially over. She dropped Grayson’s hand and pushed us together.

  “Picture time! Let’s do the whole group now.” My mom arranged us in front of the wall, Naomi and Dax to my side with Grayson’s arm around my waist. This was the closest we’d ever been, and by far the longest we’d ever touched. His hand rested on my hip, every part of me burning under his touch. My mom seemed to take forever fiddling with the adjustments on her camera. She looked up for the briefest of moments and my jaw dropped at her expression. She was totally doing this on purpose.

  Traitor, indeed.

  “Any day now, Mom,” I said. My hand was resting on Grayson’s arm and I was pretty sure I was starting to sweat, which I was sure Grayson would find super attractive.

  “What’s the matter, Quinn?” Grayson whispered in my ear. I hated that. It sent shivers down my spine and made me feel all … confused. “Do I make you nervous?”

  Yes.

  “No.”

  He chuckled, and I pinched his arm.

  “You wish,” I said.

  “Maybe I do.”

  What was that supposed to mean? I was going to spend the rest of the night thinking about it. He could be saying he liked me, which wasn’t likely. Or he could be saying he liked the attention, which I already knew. Or, worst of all, Carter could have been right about him all along.

  One thing was for sure, in that moment I was 100 percent glad he’d said it low enough that no one else could have possibly heard it, especially my mom who was busy snapping pictures and then looking at them with much too big of a smile taking over her face.