How to Speak Boy

by Tiana Smith

  “Okay, I think we’ve got it,” she said, holding out the camera for us to see. I escaped from Grayson’s arm with relief.

  The pictures were cute. It didn’t even look like I hated Grayson. I was smiling and happy, so I deserved some kind of award. Really, I was just glad they were over with and I wouldn’t have to do it again.

  “Now I need to get only Grayson and Quinn,” my mom said, bursting my bubble. Already, my hands started to get clammy. Why couldn’t I be one of those girls who never sweats? “Naomi, you and Dax can go to dinner now. I hope you have a lovely night.”

  Naomi hugged me, then waved goodbye without looking back. How could she leave me like this, without any backup? Some best friend she was. They took off in Dax’s truck and suddenly I was alone with Grayson. And my mom.

  Awesome.

  “Quinn, let’s do one where you’re behind him looking over his shoulder. No, you have to be closer than that.”

  I wanted to remind my mom that we weren’t a real couple, but something told me she wouldn’t care. Instead, I let her pose us in fifty different ways until she was completely satisfied; then Grayson and I got out of there as quickly as possible.

  “Sorry about my mom,” I said as we buckled our seat belts. If I could have melted from embarrassment right there in his car, I’d be a puddle right about now.

  “Yeah, geez. A photographer doing her job? Talk about torture,” Grayson said. I tried to get a read on his emotions, but he was hiding whatever he was thinking under a smile. He started the engine. “No worries. My mom micromanaged everything tonight too. She picked out my outfit and made the dinner reservations for us without any of my input. So you can’t be mad at me if it all goes downhill from here.”

  “Oh?” I turned to face him. “Where are we going to dinner?”

  “I don’t even know,” he said.

  I brought a hand to my chest and pretended to look shocked. “You mean there’s something you don’t know? And you’re willing to admit it?”

  He laughed, and everything he’d said caught up in my brain.

  “Wait a second, how do you not know? You’re driving there right now.”

  He tapped his car’s dashboard, which had Google Maps opened.

  “She input directions on how to get there. Apparently she had to pull some strings since it’s a hot new place and they were completely booked because of the fall fling. But since we only found out we’d be going a week ago, she had to call the owner.”

  Life as the governor’s son sure came with its perks. I used to think Grayson simply got his way all the time because of his charm and presence, but I guess it didn’t hurt to have powerful parents.

  “I usually hate it when she throws around her position like that, but I’ll let it slide tonight if it means we won’t starve.” He smiled, and I stared at him, stunned.

  I opened my mouth, then shut it. I always assumed Grayson liked the attention he got from his mom’s position, but looking back now, I realized how rarely he even brought her up in our conversations. He didn’t capitalize on it at all. If he enjoyed the attention, wouldn’t he bring it up more?

  Sometimes I judged people harshly. I knew this. The question was, had I done that to Grayson?

  Chapter Eleven

  We pulled into the parking lot, and I hit the locks on the doors.

  “We can’t go in there,” I said, pushing Grayson back when he’d gone for the handle.

  “What?” He glanced down at my arm, which was still pressed against his chest. I dropped it hurriedly.

  “That’s the same restaurant where Dax and Naomi are eating tonight. The vegan place. If we go in now, they’ll wonder why we didn’t want to sit with them.”

  “Are you sure you just don’t want to be seen with me in public?”

  I sighed exaggeratedly. “You got me.”

  Grayson laughed and tapped the steering wheel. “Okay, we can go somewhere else,” he said. He put the car in reverse and I sagged against my seat in gratitude.

  “Where do you want to go? Most of the good places are probably full,” he said.

  I chewed my lip. “Fast food?” I suggested.

  He looked at me. “And you won’t call me a cheapskate to all your friends tomorrow?”

  I held up my hands in surrender. “No promises,” I said sarcastically. “Hey, I might even insist on paying my half, then where would you be?”

  Grayson laughed. “I knew I liked you. Fast food it is.”

  I swallowed. Grayson didn’t seem aware of what he’d just said. But his words repeated over and over in my head like one of those breaking news alerts at the bottom of a TV screen. I knew I liked you. I knew I liked you. I knew I liked you.

  “So, Mexican, Chinese, American, Thai, or some other type of food you’re particularly craving? Your wish is my command.”

  “I like hamburgers,” I said as nonchalantly as possible. No need to clue him in that all his suave moves were messing with my mind. What was wrong with me?

  After a moment, I got brave enough to look over. It was getting darker and I couldn’t quite read his expression. He nodded, then pulled out of the parking lot, turning left.

  “I know what we’re going to do then,” he said.

  When we pulled into a Five Guys, I could have kissed him in gratitude. Hamburgers were a thousand times better than any vegan place.

  We ordered our food, and Grayson got it to go. True to my word, I insisted on paying for half, even when he put up a fight. Then again, fighting was nothing new to us. When we got to the car, Grayson placed the bags on the back seat.

  “What if I’m hungry now?” I asked, reaching behind us and snagging a fry from the bag before clipping my seat belt.

  “You’ll have to wait and see.” He grinned, clearly pleased with whatever he had planned next.

  We drove farther and farther from the city, up into the hills of Boise. Soon we were on a dirt road going nowhere and I briefly considered whether Grayson might be a serial killer or something sinister, luring me away from civilization and witnesses. Maybe he wasn’t trying to seduce me and sabotage my chances at beating him. Maybe he’d just kill me and be done with it. It’d give a whole new meaning to the phrase taking her out.

  Grayson turned off the road into a pullout that overlooked the city lights and my stomach flopped, unsure of what to feel. Excited? Anxious? How was I supposed to navigate this situation? If Grayson was only playing a game, and wasn’t actually interested in me, then this was sure a long way for him to go to do it. My certainty wavered. I’d always pictured Grayson as the enemy in my story, and usually he fit the part perfectly. But lately all his barbs had been less pointed, more flirty, and I couldn’t help but wonder what he was playing at. It was maddening, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Because while I was waiting, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, maybe I was getting too close to the enemy?

  Grayson grabbed the bags of food and motioned for me to stay put while he got out to get my door. That gesture alone made my head spin. Then he led me to a bench and I joined him, smoothing my skirt before I sat. It was a good thing to keep my hands busy, because suddenly I had no idea what to do with them. Thankfully, Grayson handed me my bag of food so I wouldn’t have to feel so hopelessly awkward.

  Grayson had left the radio running in his car, and the music drifted to where we were sitting on the bench, overlooking the city lights. The stars were starting to come out, and all I could think about was how it could have been romantic—if I were with anyone else. Someone who didn’t tease me mercilessly or get in my way every step of every day.

  “How’re the whales treating you?” Grayson asked. He’d put his bag of food on the other side of the bench so we were sitting side by side. It was relatively warm tonight, the air like a caress on my skin. “Is your speech going swimmingly?”

  I chewed a bite of hamburger before responding.

  “I’m killing it,” I said with a chuckle. “Get it? Killer whales? Oh, never mind.” He was looki
ng at me with pity, like he couldn’t believe such a lame joke had escaped my lips. “You’re the one that started with the bad puns.”

  He scoffed. “Me? A bad pun? That would never happen and you know it.”

  “What?” The word burst out of me. “You are the king of bad jokes. And bad … I don’t know. Everything.” I waved my hand in the air, gesturing to all of Grayson.

  He raised his eyebrows. “Says the girl who lost to me in the last competition.”

  I set my hamburger down and crossed my arms. “I lost because the judges can’t resist a pretty face. Just because you’re cute doesn’t mean you’re talented.”

  Grayson held his hands up and waggled his eyebrows. “All I hear is that you think I’m cute.”

  I shook my head, but already I could feel the heat creeping up my neck. “Yeah, well, I think a pangolin is cute, and they look like a walking artichoke, so clearly the bar isn’t that high.”

  Grayson nudged my shoulder. “Still,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, “you think I’m cute.”

  I scoffed, then picked up a wad of napkins and threw them at him.

  “You’re the worst.”

  He took another one off the top of the pile and threw it back. “You’re the worst,” he repeated.

  I swatted the napkin away from my face and tried to stare him down.

  Grayson gave a short laugh. “You’re so … infuriating sometimes.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know whether to—to shake you, or to—” He shook his head in frustration, the words seemingly getting lost in his throat. Then turned to me, his eyes burning.

  Grayson brought his hand behind my neck and closed the distance between us.

  He kissed me.

  It was unexpected and overpowering, and without realizing it, a small gasp escaped my lips. I’d never felt so much heat in a kiss before.

  I was too shocked to react. All of me was running on instinct, trying to process what was happening.

  Was this some kind of a game? Why now? Was he hoping to break my concentration before the state championship?

  And why did I get pickles and onions on my hamburger?

  What I should have done was gotten a mint shake.

  I couldn’t think of anything more substantial than that, because literally nothing made sense anymore.

  Grayson’s lips softened, and I relaxed almost against my will, running my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. He caught my lower lip in his and I placed my other hand on his chest to keep from falling.

  He tasted like salt. I’d never known I’d liked salt so much before. I’d thought that his glasses might make things awkward, but he either had a lot of practice, which I didn’t really want to think about, or I’d been wrong, because his glasses didn’t get in the way.

  His kiss made me dizzy. And confused. Very, very confused. Because I thought Grayson hated me. But he seemed to be enjoying it as much as I was, which couldn’t be right. Everything around me dulled to a buzz and I couldn’t help but get lost in the moment.

  Until I saw flashes of red and blue light behind my closed eyelids.

  With a snap, I opened them and pulled back. There, directly next to Grayson’s, was a cop car with its lights flashing.

  “Oh no,” I breathed. Grayson turned on the bench to face the lights, so I couldn’t see his face, though I desperately wanted to. What had he been thinking? I felt wild and full of energy. Surely my face was flushed, but with the flashing lights all around us, I doubted anyone could tell. Had cop lights always been so blindingly bright? Since when had it gotten so dark? How long had I been here with Grayson?

  We were going to jail. For what, I wasn’t sure, but I was certain of it. Cops didn’t show up with their lights going if they weren’t ready to lay down some law. Served me right for fraternizing with the enemy, even if I had liked it.

  The police officer got out of her car and shut the door. She walked to the bench where we were sitting, and from her expression, it was obvious she found this whole situation humorous, which it so was not.

  “Grayson Hawks.”

  Oh great. She knew who he was. This kept getting better and better.

  I shrunk back and tried to hide in the shadows. My mom was going to kill me.

  “What would your mother think?” the cop asked, and it took me a full twenty seconds to realize she was talking to Grayson, not reading my thoughts. Which meant the police officer didn’t know him because Grayson did this a lot, but because she knew the governor, and that made a whole lot more sense than anything else I’d been thinking.

  Grayson cleared his throat. “I’m hoping you won’t tell her?” he said. It sounded more like a question. “I’d kind of like to tell her myself.” Grayson pulled at the collar of his shirt and put his hand to the back of his neck.

  The police officer smiled. “Well, since you haven’t done anything illegal, you’re off the hook.”

  My brows furrowed and I couldn’t help but speak up.

  “If we’ve done nothing illegal, why did you stop here?” And why was there a bench if people weren’t supposed to use it?

  The officer motioned to the surrounding area. “On certain holidays and school events we make the rounds at popular, ummm, canoodling places,” she responded. Who said canoodling anymore? Even she seemed uncomfortable with the word, crossing her arms and shrugging at the same time. “If there’s some public indecency going on, then we need to step in.”

  “Public indecency?” I asked.

  Then my thoughts caught up to what we were talking about and I wished I hadn’t said a thing.

  “If anyone was naked,” Grayson said, explaining what I already had figured out. Despite the growing darkness, I was pretty sure my face was flaming so much it could light up the sky. In my defense, I still wasn’t thinking clearly. Obviously. My better judgment seemed to have taken a vacation.

  The police officer nodded, then motioned back to her car, where the lights still flashed. “I’ll be on my way. You two don’t stay long, all right? I don’t want to have to bust you for real.”

  I’d thought I’d been blushing before, but that was nothing compared to now. I actually thought Grayson might be able to feel the heat coming off my face.

  He saluted the police officer, who nodded and walked back to her car. Grayson and I didn’t say anything until she’d driven off. Then her headlights disappeared around the curve and I couldn’t help it. I burst into laughter.

  “I thought we were going to jail,” I said between wheezes. “Seriously.”

  The stress had finally gotten to me. The confusion. The complete and utter inability to know how to react to the situation. It was either laugh or … well, there was no or. Laughing was my only option.

  Grayson seemed to agree, because he had his head in his hands and was laughing so hard it filled the space around us. He tilted his head back and laughed at the sky. Neither of us stopped for quite some time.

  I finally got control of myself and took a few deep breaths. That’s when Grayson looked at me and we burst into laughter again. When we finally stopped, all we did was sit there for a while, breathing. Of course, that was when my thoughts started flooding back.

  What was that? What had possessed me? Us?

  Grayson looked at me without saying anything. Then he leaned over and kissed me again, catching me by surprise.

  It was a good surprise. Maybe. The jury was still out, but I no longer knew what to think anymore.

  Grayson pulled back, gave his token half smile, then stood up.

  “We should probably get to the dance,” he said.

  I nodded emphatically. Yes, other people. I needed other people around me, otherwise I’d be tempted to try kissing Grayson again, to see if it’d been a fluke. I mean, I hadn’t hated it. Kind of the opposite, really.

  We walked back to the car without saying anything.

  When Grayson closed my door and walked around back to his side, I let out a whoosh of air. By the
time he opened his side, I was perfectly in control again, but my head was still reeling.

  With what had just happened, I wasn’t sure if the reeling would ever stop.

  Chapter Twelve

  Grayson and I texted on Sunday. We never mentioned The Kiss (yes, it deserved capital letters), but I sent him the pictures my mom had taken before the dance and we … flirted … over the phone. And by flirting, I mean he drove me to distraction trying to analyze the meaning behind all his texts. But it was obvious that something had changed between us. If only I could figure out exactly what.

  Nothing unexpected had happened at the fall fling. (Unless you counted the zings of electricity between us whenever we danced or the way he stole glances at me all evening. It was enough to drive me batty.)

  He hadn’t tried kissing me again.

  Somehow a few less-than-sober friends from school had ended up in his car at the end of the night, so it wasn’t like we had much opportunity. I didn’t know whether to be disappointed or relieved—saved from myself. Because the fact of the matter was, I wanted it to happen again, and that was mind-boggling. The only emotion I seemed to settle on with any consistency was bewilderment.

  I thought I hated Grayson. But then he kissed me, and I realized maybe I didn’t hate him after all. I hadn’t been fooling anyone else, but I’d fallen for my own charade plenty. Now I knew I actually … liked him? I needed his attention. I needed his validation. For him to really see me. All those barbs I threw in his direction were a distraction from my own feelings. It was a startling realization to come to. That attraction had been masquerading as hate all along.

  The question was whether he felt the same way. But if he didn’t … Then what had possessed him to kiss me?

  I don’t know whether to—to shake you, or to—

  His words from that night made a perfect kind of strange sense. Well, if he really felt that way.

  The problem was, I had no idea what he was thinking. Seeing him in person was going to change that, because I needed answers, stat. If this was all some kind of game, like Carter suggested, then I needed to talk to Grayson. In person. No more texts that could mean one thing or another. Maybe Grayson was as confused as I was, but all this tiptoeing around the situation wasn’t doing my mental health any favors. I needed to know what that kiss meant, and I needed to know now.